(775) Excessive protective love

I have been debating about whether I should write this real story. While I hope it is a unique case and not common, the undue emphasis of excelling in public examinations in my country does not contribute positively to mental health.

When my family lived in a small town, the fellowship group used to rotate its meeting place among the members' homes. Our member Jane brought a young lady to my house. With no prior information given, I thought she was in her early twenties. Much later, we found that she was already thirty two years old. Apparently she did badly in her high school public examination. Since she did not anticipate it, it came as a blow. For weeks she hid in her room and refused food.

Obviously the family  did not seek professional help. Otherwise, things would not have deteriorated to the extent that this young girl stopped studying but never was gainfully employed. Since the parents were well to do, every year they took her overseas on tour. From what she said, she had been to many popular tourist destinations all over the world and to other countries that none of our members have been to.

Since she usually brought a big bag to our meetings, I was fearful of what she brought in the bag. Each time I hosted the meeting in my house, I made sure my children were upstairs in their locked rooms. You may think I was paranoid, but she had chased her brother with a cleaver knife before. Her parents let her whims control over whether she takes her medications. Without her medicine for four days, she could not even carry on a normal conversation.

In this case, it was the excessively protective love that prevented her from the medical breakthroughs that could heal that ravaged brain. Her parents listened to horror stories told about insane asylum and never admitted her even once. Whenever she got out of control, they placed her in hospital. Once she became coherent, they took her home. They loved her so much and they feared what others would do to her that they refused to commit her to long term psychiatric care even though the chances of cure was high for the initial stage.