If you have been reading my blog using the key word dyslexia, chances are you have read about my adult friend who supplied me with her unresolved symptoms. She came in many names, in fact she is most paranoid about being my subject in this blog. After a few years, she came to trust me enough to tell me more.
That day she told me confidentially that when she could no longer cope with any verbal abuse, she could dissociate her consciousness and step away from her body. In a way she was still standing or sitting there, but she also becomes an onlooker, thus the verbal tirade would not hurt as much.
When I told her about the Davies' Method of therapy for dyslexic children, she was visibly distressed. As I revealed more about my observation as a Home Tutor, what the mother of the target child said, and what the child himself testified about, my friend started coughing quite badly. On the one hand, it is to her advantage to know more about her condition, as knowledge would set her free. But on the other hand, she could not handle too much information at any one installment. Thus, though she is drawn to me, she could not handle listening to me for too long or too frequently. As you must have concluded by now, my pet topic is learning difficulties as a broad subject.
When I told her in detail about how my ex-student found it difficult to read, the reason was words danced around him; I saw anguish in her eyes. I realized she was getting to tread back into her landmine years. It must have been difficult! She conquered her own demons with no help whatsoever. Her salvation came in the form of English children's books. She would fail every subject except English. Some how by working triple hard, she passed major examinations. The few short term jobs she has had before she married did not work out. For one she was too disorganized to file or find documents. But as a language tutor now she is perfect. She takes students in all shapes, sizes, with all kinds of baggage and turned them into A students. In the process, she loves them, mothers those who are neglected for whatever reason. She worms her way into her students' hearts, she spoils them with attention and snacks. After a while they would work hard for her sake alone, so that she would be able to continue to earn a good living charging those well-to-do parents her rates.
After the therapy, my ex-student was able to center his attention about eight inches on top and slightly behind his head. Then with that anchored, he could read normally. For him, his point was yellow in colour. As a tutor who worked with him for at least a year before he underwent therapy, I could see him greatly improved. What I marveled at was he was installed with an activity level meter on top of his navel. The level of activity runs from 1 to 10. In order to study and absorb new things, he should tune it to 5. Most often, he bounced around at 8. It sounded like a huge imagination, yet it really worked. With reminding him about attaching his attention to his yellow point, tuning down his buoyant personality to 5, he could actually go through an exercise in English with no sweat. After a while, he no longer needed to have a special tutor and I moved onto other interesting students.
I know all these knowledge came too late for my friend the language tutor. But I am sure it helps to know that she belongs to a big group of sufferers worldwide. She was not a retard as others teased her years ago. She is not stupid as her siblings claimed. She is not crazy as her ex-husband presumed. She is just a dyslexic who made good. No mean feat! It is quite an achievement that she should be proud of!
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Saturday, September 17, 2011
(531) The Chase by Louisa M Alcott
When I was fourteen years old, we were using Little Women as our literature text. It was many years before I located Good Wives in a pile of old books in a jumble sale. I read Jo's Boys one summer in a community library in a suburban area when I was a college student in America. And it was after my children started reading that I finally read Little Men. It was not as well written as Little Women. I guess the author must be fed up about the long and drawn out tale across the generation. But readers are not to be deterred, demands must be met.
Imagine my surprise that there is another book published by her. This "new" book is totally different from the four books I have read over the years. I can't say it is better or worse, but it is difficult to imagine that such a different book is written by an author I am familiar with. This topic about obsessive love is more of a contemporary topic too. I think of Nemesis by Agatha Christie. Obsessive love kills eventually. Indeed, in these two books, "love" is a frightening thing!
Imagine my surprise that there is another book published by her. This "new" book is totally different from the four books I have read over the years. I can't say it is better or worse, but it is difficult to imagine that such a different book is written by an author I am familiar with. This topic about obsessive love is more of a contemporary topic too. I think of Nemesis by Agatha Christie. Obsessive love kills eventually. Indeed, in these two books, "love" is a frightening thing!
(530) Secrets by Freya North
It was interesting to read about house sitting. I was a student when it was both convenient and economical to house sit for friends' friend during the summer.
Here in this book, I read of professional house sitters who bring their little world with them into the house they are bound by contract to care for. That is very different from my amateur days of moving in with sufficient clothing with not much else.
Tess chose to keep her love child, that was the first step towards economic hardship. Then it did not help to have a failed business venture that left debts. It is really familiar. I have a friend who achieved financial success in her mid twenties. She had a few failed relationships and one brief marriage. Some how she kept on with a pregnancy when her partner told her to abort. When her daughter was in her teens, she failed in a daring venture and has unpaid debts since. These two years, she has been slowly clearing her debts to friends and relatives. It was a slow, tedious crawl upwards.
Joe sounded like a much broken man. His avoidance of monogamous relationship sounded like a fear to commit. It is uncanny that my friend's new face book hot friend also goes by the same moniker. Just like the story Secrets, the real live tess and joe could not walk away from each other. Of course a courtship on the internet is very different from that between a house sitter and the land lord. I was much amazed by the frequent quarrels they have had over the net.
Real life is not that different from fiction. In the book, it was ended as they live happily ever after. Although I have known a life group member who actually married her friend whom she met over the net quite a few years ago, I often wonder if such a feat could be repeated.
Here in this book, I read of professional house sitters who bring their little world with them into the house they are bound by contract to care for. That is very different from my amateur days of moving in with sufficient clothing with not much else.
Tess chose to keep her love child, that was the first step towards economic hardship. Then it did not help to have a failed business venture that left debts. It is really familiar. I have a friend who achieved financial success in her mid twenties. She had a few failed relationships and one brief marriage. Some how she kept on with a pregnancy when her partner told her to abort. When her daughter was in her teens, she failed in a daring venture and has unpaid debts since. These two years, she has been slowly clearing her debts to friends and relatives. It was a slow, tedious crawl upwards.
Joe sounded like a much broken man. His avoidance of monogamous relationship sounded like a fear to commit. It is uncanny that my friend's new face book hot friend also goes by the same moniker. Just like the story Secrets, the real live tess and joe could not walk away from each other. Of course a courtship on the internet is very different from that between a house sitter and the land lord. I was much amazed by the frequent quarrels they have had over the net.
Real life is not that different from fiction. In the book, it was ended as they live happily ever after. Although I have known a life group member who actually married her friend whom she met over the net quite a few years ago, I often wonder if such a feat could be repeated.
(529) Enigma
While waiting for university admission, Elizabeth took on coaching a student for examination. Although she made him go through work book exercises of all subjects, she specialised in teaching him mathematics. After she moved into the hostel for the academic year, I took over the task on week days.
It was interesting that I found out a few contrasting facts about him. He is fifteen years old. He spent the first six years studying in a Chinese medium school with English and the National language thrown in. Next he transitioned into a school where he did all his subjects in the National language except Maths and Science. He still studies English as a second language.
By the time Elizabeth was summoned, he was barely passing all his subjects. I was appalled by the English composition he wrote for his final exam. I was shocked by the silly and careless mistakes he made in his Maths paper one. He worked sums in his head, wrongly. He read his question in part, leaving out the line that states that the answer be presented in two decimal places. And he left questions with diagrams that look complicated, when in actual fact it was easily solved by one single observation.
Yet, when I went through his many mistakes in science, I found that he not only read faster than I. He could reason out arguments, chose two out of four statements just like that, within the time to snap his fingers. Now, that was unusual! Although I read English more slowly than Chinese, I am not a slow reader. Of course I can't compete with my son, Kenneth, who reads five, six lines at one go. I have seldom come across any college students who reads fast, let alone a fifteen year old.
His grammar could be atrocious, but once he was given sufficient points for content; the composition he wrote was quite acceptable. Surprisingly, he could summarise both in English and the National language rather well. He could pick out main points, articulate in simple sentences that fall within the word limit.
And this same boy does not read, at all. He did not read his literature book through, not even once. He could not remember reading any non-text book at all, in his entire life. After having had dedicated and interesting teachers in his first six years, he gave up not listening to any of his class teachers the last three years. There is a point that he is right, most of his current teachers probably could not even be compared to those he had when he was younger. But not to listen to a single lesson tentamount to committing academic suicide. I wonder if there are lots of boys like that within our educational system? Is that the reason why each year we have increasingly more girls who made it to government universities?
It was interesting that I found out a few contrasting facts about him. He is fifteen years old. He spent the first six years studying in a Chinese medium school with English and the National language thrown in. Next he transitioned into a school where he did all his subjects in the National language except Maths and Science. He still studies English as a second language.
By the time Elizabeth was summoned, he was barely passing all his subjects. I was appalled by the English composition he wrote for his final exam. I was shocked by the silly and careless mistakes he made in his Maths paper one. He worked sums in his head, wrongly. He read his question in part, leaving out the line that states that the answer be presented in two decimal places. And he left questions with diagrams that look complicated, when in actual fact it was easily solved by one single observation.
Yet, when I went through his many mistakes in science, I found that he not only read faster than I. He could reason out arguments, chose two out of four statements just like that, within the time to snap his fingers. Now, that was unusual! Although I read English more slowly than Chinese, I am not a slow reader. Of course I can't compete with my son, Kenneth, who reads five, six lines at one go. I have seldom come across any college students who reads fast, let alone a fifteen year old.
His grammar could be atrocious, but once he was given sufficient points for content; the composition he wrote was quite acceptable. Surprisingly, he could summarise both in English and the National language rather well. He could pick out main points, articulate in simple sentences that fall within the word limit.
And this same boy does not read, at all. He did not read his literature book through, not even once. He could not remember reading any non-text book at all, in his entire life. After having had dedicated and interesting teachers in his first six years, he gave up not listening to any of his class teachers the last three years. There is a point that he is right, most of his current teachers probably could not even be compared to those he had when he was younger. But not to listen to a single lesson tentamount to committing academic suicide. I wonder if there are lots of boys like that within our educational system? Is that the reason why each year we have increasingly more girls who made it to government universities?
(528) Phantoms by Dean Koontz
It is fiction that tied in with age old unexplained mysteries. Looking at those beautifully built monuments that were left to be reclaimed by nature, I have wondered what exactly exterminated such a distinct ancient civilisation in South America. We know that the Spanish had waged war successfully for decades, but that would not explain a hill top city that was both deserted, unknown and abandoned.
Koontz wove such mystery into modern day doomsday in a town called Snowfield in California. Here the police, the Governor, the army and the press were involved. Where unexplained deaths occurred, autopsies were performed. Scientists in space suits carried out their tests determining if it was chemical or biological weapons. Even specialists in outer space alien theory were invited to be present. Here the author built the image of an invincible monster. Almost, but not quite! The ego of the monster turned itself into an object to be examined. That in turn revealed its vulnerability. The desire for glory determined that the monster wanted an author to document its power. That bought time for the biologist to import an item which might destroy the monster.
After the monster was killed, it went on to show us that the two human followers of the creature were overcome by fire power while they tried to carry out more murders. As in traditional tales, the two heroes were rewarded by finding their soul mates. I felt like I was sitting by the fire side listening to the end of an exciting epic poem.
It is a well written book. However, it is unlikely I would read it again. My friend who lent me the book seemed to think differently. She had given me better books for recycling but she wanted this one back. Interesting!
Koontz wove such mystery into modern day doomsday in a town called Snowfield in California. Here the police, the Governor, the army and the press were involved. Where unexplained deaths occurred, autopsies were performed. Scientists in space suits carried out their tests determining if it was chemical or biological weapons. Even specialists in outer space alien theory were invited to be present. Here the author built the image of an invincible monster. Almost, but not quite! The ego of the monster turned itself into an object to be examined. That in turn revealed its vulnerability. The desire for glory determined that the monster wanted an author to document its power. That bought time for the biologist to import an item which might destroy the monster.
After the monster was killed, it went on to show us that the two human followers of the creature were overcome by fire power while they tried to carry out more murders. As in traditional tales, the two heroes were rewarded by finding their soul mates. I felt like I was sitting by the fire side listening to the end of an exciting epic poem.
It is a well written book. However, it is unlikely I would read it again. My friend who lent me the book seemed to think differently. She had given me better books for recycling but she wanted this one back. Interesting!
Friday, September 9, 2011
(527) Visiting
Over the festive days, we visited Elizabeth's former Vice Principal. Since we left Silver City, we have been visiting her family most years. Last year we went to enjoy her asam laksa on the first day of Moslem Year after Ramadan. We were really entertained by the stories of her son and daughter-in-law's exotic green lizard from South America. The year before, we sat in her sitting room looking at the bridal pictures of her son's wedding. This year, the beautiful bride has put on some weight, she looks like the wife of a prosperous restaurant owner.
The Vice Principal did not change much. After retiring from Government teaching, she joined the local International School. She kept house. She pampered her plants. She is a teacher to be reckoned with. Elizabeth is a very fortunate girl to go to a mission school with many serious teachers like this Vice Principal. Even though my country's educational system has turned to gear itself towards churning out A's, there are still a few schools where we find teachers who are dedicated and really educate the children.
Now that a person is measured in terms of the house she owns and the car she drives, we need to nurture more teachers who are called to teach. The salary alone may attract the wrong type of people. We need teachers who are there to make a difference. In my church, I am beginning to see the answers to our prayers for Godly teachers. There are a few youth training themselves to teach. May this trickle multiply many folds!
The Vice Principal did not change much. After retiring from Government teaching, she joined the local International School. She kept house. She pampered her plants. She is a teacher to be reckoned with. Elizabeth is a very fortunate girl to go to a mission school with many serious teachers like this Vice Principal. Even though my country's educational system has turned to gear itself towards churning out A's, there are still a few schools where we find teachers who are dedicated and really educate the children.
Now that a person is measured in terms of the house she owns and the car she drives, we need to nurture more teachers who are called to teach. The salary alone may attract the wrong type of people. We need teachers who are there to make a difference. In my church, I am beginning to see the answers to our prayers for Godly teachers. There are a few youth training themselves to teach. May this trickle multiply many folds!
Thursday, September 8, 2011
(526) Starting University
I just sent Elizabeth off to Uni with her father. It was interesting looking at the many parents who went to attend the talks given by the Uni officials. The roads to the hostels were bumper to bumper. We parked as directed and walked for a good fifteen minutes to get to her hostel.
Once she was registered, we climbed to her room and found two girls and their mothers cleaning the room. One mom actually brought a vacuum cleaner and was hoovering the dusty mattress. I left Elizabeth with her rags and her room mate's pail. High time she learns to be independent.
On the way back, I saw the only luxurious big model car with a well endowed girl and her entourage. They were carrying about fifty outfits of silk formal wear in crisp plastic covers out of the enormous boot. Well! Good luck with the closet that was about fourteen inches wide. Not unless she can persuade the hostel staff to let her pay triple the fee and kick out two other students. Space is a premium, a single bed, a double decker and a regular closet divided into three sections fitted in a room no bigger than fourteen by eleven feet. I did not even notice if there are any study desks. If there is, they must be mini desks.
I am very thankful she was accepted. With the low tuition there is no need for her to take a study loan. She will be one of the few graduates in a few years' time that will be debt free. Primitive as her living conditions will be, she will be a lot more comfortable than the children in any refugee camps. If she can live in harmony in such an environment with two room mates, chances are she would do well with any difficult co-workers in the future.
Once she was registered, we climbed to her room and found two girls and their mothers cleaning the room. One mom actually brought a vacuum cleaner and was hoovering the dusty mattress. I left Elizabeth with her rags and her room mate's pail. High time she learns to be independent.
On the way back, I saw the only luxurious big model car with a well endowed girl and her entourage. They were carrying about fifty outfits of silk formal wear in crisp plastic covers out of the enormous boot. Well! Good luck with the closet that was about fourteen inches wide. Not unless she can persuade the hostel staff to let her pay triple the fee and kick out two other students. Space is a premium, a single bed, a double decker and a regular closet divided into three sections fitted in a room no bigger than fourteen by eleven feet. I did not even notice if there are any study desks. If there is, they must be mini desks.
I am very thankful she was accepted. With the low tuition there is no need for her to take a study loan. She will be one of the few graduates in a few years' time that will be debt free. Primitive as her living conditions will be, she will be a lot more comfortable than the children in any refugee camps. If she can live in harmony in such an environment with two room mates, chances are she would do well with any difficult co-workers in the future.
(525) At the Altar by L.M. Montgomery
I just came back from my neighbour's house. While one sister is planning a spring wedding with her American boy friend, the other sister's relationship came to a stand still. Reason: boy friend's mom.
The situation reminded me of "The Wooing of Bessy" in At the Altar. In the story, the mother of Lawrence Eastman contrived to cause a quarrel between her son and his girl friend. She not only lied but put the blame on another person.
My neighbour was doing well with the boy friend's mom until one daughter came for a visit from New Zealand. For all we know, the visitor was the mischief maker. It seemed to me that if the prospective mom-in-law trusted her enough to seek her help in remitting funds from Thailand, it was most surprising that once the daughter returned to New Zealand, she was no longer welcome in the old lady's house.
In the story, true love triumphed as Lawrence went and checked to see if his mom told the truth. In real life, if a forty-five-year-old man is still tied to his mom's apron strings, I don't think my neighbour should cry over losing him!
The situation reminded me of "The Wooing of Bessy" in At the Altar. In the story, the mother of Lawrence Eastman contrived to cause a quarrel between her son and his girl friend. She not only lied but put the blame on another person.
My neighbour was doing well with the boy friend's mom until one daughter came for a visit from New Zealand. For all we know, the visitor was the mischief maker. It seemed to me that if the prospective mom-in-law trusted her enough to seek her help in remitting funds from Thailand, it was most surprising that once the daughter returned to New Zealand, she was no longer welcome in the old lady's house.
In the story, true love triumphed as Lawrence went and checked to see if his mom told the truth. In real life, if a forty-five-year-old man is still tied to his mom's apron strings, I don't think my neighbour should cry over losing him!
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
(524) P.Jackson & Olympians by Rick Riordan
One day my old school buddy who is a pre-Christian asked Elizabeth if she had seen any Harry Porter movies or read any of the series. My daughter's answer was I advised her not to read it when she was young. Now that she is an adult, she has lost the desire to read or watch any of them.
To be fair to my children, I did not either. Not that if I read any of those books, they would shake my beliefs. My stand now is my adult children are welcome to read them or watch the movies if they really want to.
By borrowing from two friends, Elizabeth and I read the "Eragon" series. We enjoyed them tremendously as folk tales. Perhaps there were former worlds where dragons were present. Perhaps not! But the important thing is we are living in our present world where we only see dragon dance during Chinese New Year celebrations.
Lately I have access to Riordan's series. I can assure you I spent many hours reading happily. Here I will record their names: The Lightning Thief, The Sea of Monsters, The Titan's Curse, The Battle of the Labyrinth, and The Last Olympian.
It may seem strange that a woman of my age with much grey hair is reading what some may consider as children's books. Well, I am still trying to catch up with the years when I was speaking, thinking and dreaming in Mandarin. I read my first English book with the help of my trusty English-Chinese dictionary when I was fourteen. I only managed to source and finish reading the Famous Five series when I was eighteen years old. All I can remember about the Greek Mythologies was a simplified reader I plow through in the dim past. Since then I have found lots of contradictory references to it in numerous books and magazine articles. A few years ago, I learned a little more of it from Agatha Christie's The Labour of Hercules.
I thought the authors or the historians got all mixed up over Greek mythologies. It was not until Riordan pointed out in his series that there was a Titan's age and then an Olympian age that I began to see that many sets of players fought for power over thousands of years. It sounded like the dynasties in China. The only difference is that the Chinese killed everyone connected with the deposed Emperor. The Olympians cannot kill their predecessors for good because they were supposed to be immortal. I wonder how much was related in the mythologies and how much was made up by Riordan.
The fact that Percy chose to remain a mortal so he would not outlive Annabeth made the series an Adventure love story. In a way it is a happy ending. The irresponsible Olympians were bound by oath for a time to acknowledge their half-blood off-springs and bring them to the training camp. It was good to have the population of the camp increase. It sounded like in the ancient days where angels took human females and begot children who become the heroes of old.
To be fair to my children, I did not either. Not that if I read any of those books, they would shake my beliefs. My stand now is my adult children are welcome to read them or watch the movies if they really want to.
By borrowing from two friends, Elizabeth and I read the "Eragon" series. We enjoyed them tremendously as folk tales. Perhaps there were former worlds where dragons were present. Perhaps not! But the important thing is we are living in our present world where we only see dragon dance during Chinese New Year celebrations.
Lately I have access to Riordan's series. I can assure you I spent many hours reading happily. Here I will record their names: The Lightning Thief, The Sea of Monsters, The Titan's Curse, The Battle of the Labyrinth, and The Last Olympian.
It may seem strange that a woman of my age with much grey hair is reading what some may consider as children's books. Well, I am still trying to catch up with the years when I was speaking, thinking and dreaming in Mandarin. I read my first English book with the help of my trusty English-Chinese dictionary when I was fourteen. I only managed to source and finish reading the Famous Five series when I was eighteen years old. All I can remember about the Greek Mythologies was a simplified reader I plow through in the dim past. Since then I have found lots of contradictory references to it in numerous books and magazine articles. A few years ago, I learned a little more of it from Agatha Christie's The Labour of Hercules.
I thought the authors or the historians got all mixed up over Greek mythologies. It was not until Riordan pointed out in his series that there was a Titan's age and then an Olympian age that I began to see that many sets of players fought for power over thousands of years. It sounded like the dynasties in China. The only difference is that the Chinese killed everyone connected with the deposed Emperor. The Olympians cannot kill their predecessors for good because they were supposed to be immortal. I wonder how much was related in the mythologies and how much was made up by Riordan.
The fact that Percy chose to remain a mortal so he would not outlive Annabeth made the series an Adventure love story. In a way it is a happy ending. The irresponsible Olympians were bound by oath for a time to acknowledge their half-blood off-springs and bring them to the training camp. It was good to have the population of the camp increase. It sounded like in the ancient days where angels took human females and begot children who become the heroes of old.
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
(523) Total shut down
For anyone who is reading my blog for the first time, a little background. I was probably born dyslexic with some gifts in-built for learning Chinese. At age twelve I chose to confront English and at great cost I struggled to be acceptably proficient in it. At age twenty one I lived for a while with a full blown dyslexic boy eleven years old. It was through looking at him that I realized that I must have been somewhat dyslexic when I was young. After my marriage I ventured into teaching remedial English to college students. By the time my youngest was three I stumbled into special education as a home tutor. When my youngest was fourteen, I met a few women who must have been learning disabled to whatever degree. I am still in touch with some of them today.
This blog is written to compare two of the women I have attempted to help. I met both through my old school mate. A little about this old friend, she has a child who was diagnosed dyslexic. While I self diagnosed myself, she was blissfully busy with her college, boy friend and later career and business. I worked, prayed and planned on early intervention for my children. They were more or less normal by the time they reached school age. My old friend had a hard time struggling with her boy, from age seven until he was seventeen. She met Annabel through her kindergarten hunt and Zelda as a car pool mum.
Both Annabel and Zelda are capable women. They both are very attractive to men. Annabel is still single in her forties, but not because she lacks faithful suitors. She is very good at keeping her many ex-boyfriends as close friends. Zelda, on the other hand, has a disastrous marriage when she was much younger. She, too, is swinging single and attracting men like flies.
Both of them told me they have worked themselves until total physical break downs. Annabel would spend four day week-ends resting. All she could do was eat whatever was in the house, sleep and go to the toilet before returning to bed. She would give her all either to her corporate boss or her own business venture. From what she said she has no switch to lower her speed of working. It was either going at full speed or total break down for a few days of recuperation. That year that I hung out with her, I knew of two break downs.
Zelda has a tendency to be anaemic. She regularly complained about being very tired. Of course she gets run down, being on line and working at her data base at all hours. One day I met her at four pm and her hands shake - low blood sugar. All she had eaten was two bananas and a cup of coffee. She had spent hours searching for information and been on the phone continually since nine am talking to clients.
I am beginning to wonder if it is the case that both strived extremely hard to overcome their respective disabilities. So much so that both of them over compensated. They both achieved a great deal: Annabel, with Cambridge level education, was earning something like $16,000 as a team manager in a financial institution in the early eighties. Zelda, who runs her own manufacturing operation in her mid twenties, was having an average income of $20,000 - $30,000 monthly. Zelda did not have the means to further her education at age 16.
I thank God that I have slowed down. My hard working husband kept the family afloat. It is thanks to him that I have the leisure to ponder much to jot down thoughts on this blog. I am also blessed with supportive children. I hope that by sharing these observations, it will help you in some way or other in understanding my favourite group of people: those who have to work very hard to fit into regular society.
This blog is written to compare two of the women I have attempted to help. I met both through my old school mate. A little about this old friend, she has a child who was diagnosed dyslexic. While I self diagnosed myself, she was blissfully busy with her college, boy friend and later career and business. I worked, prayed and planned on early intervention for my children. They were more or less normal by the time they reached school age. My old friend had a hard time struggling with her boy, from age seven until he was seventeen. She met Annabel through her kindergarten hunt and Zelda as a car pool mum.
Both Annabel and Zelda are capable women. They both are very attractive to men. Annabel is still single in her forties, but not because she lacks faithful suitors. She is very good at keeping her many ex-boyfriends as close friends. Zelda, on the other hand, has a disastrous marriage when she was much younger. She, too, is swinging single and attracting men like flies.
Both of them told me they have worked themselves until total physical break downs. Annabel would spend four day week-ends resting. All she could do was eat whatever was in the house, sleep and go to the toilet before returning to bed. She would give her all either to her corporate boss or her own business venture. From what she said she has no switch to lower her speed of working. It was either going at full speed or total break down for a few days of recuperation. That year that I hung out with her, I knew of two break downs.
Zelda has a tendency to be anaemic. She regularly complained about being very tired. Of course she gets run down, being on line and working at her data base at all hours. One day I met her at four pm and her hands shake - low blood sugar. All she had eaten was two bananas and a cup of coffee. She had spent hours searching for information and been on the phone continually since nine am talking to clients.
I am beginning to wonder if it is the case that both strived extremely hard to overcome their respective disabilities. So much so that both of them over compensated. They both achieved a great deal: Annabel, with Cambridge level education, was earning something like $16,000 as a team manager in a financial institution in the early eighties. Zelda, who runs her own manufacturing operation in her mid twenties, was having an average income of $20,000 - $30,000 monthly. Zelda did not have the means to further her education at age 16.
I thank God that I have slowed down. My hard working husband kept the family afloat. It is thanks to him that I have the leisure to ponder much to jot down thoughts on this blog. I am also blessed with supportive children. I hope that by sharing these observations, it will help you in some way or other in understanding my favourite group of people: those who have to work very hard to fit into regular society.
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