If you are an Agatha Christie fan, do you know that she actually wrote Murder on the Orient Express in Room 411 of Pera Palas Hotel in Istanbul?
Apparently Warner Brothers wanted to make a film of the missing 11 days in her life, you know it was when she disappeared but was found in a resort under her husband's lover's name. From consulting a medium, the room was searched on 7 March 1979 and a rusty key was found under the floor boards. Sad to say, the hotel President demanded an exorbitant sum and Warner Brothers refused to comply. Therefore, her diary for that period is still locked somewhere and the key to access that was in turn locked in a safe to safeguard the Hotel's interest.
I was fascinated reading this account on pages 98 and 99.
Thursday, July 25, 2013
Wednesday, July 24, 2013
(266) Possession in Death by J.D.Robb
This story reminded me of recent crimes both in Germany and USA. It is heinous to kidnap young women, detain them against their wishes to do things they would not want to. In Germany it happened in an underground dwelling. In USA it actually happened in a house with near neighbors. In this story the unbalanced perp just wanted to dance with those beautiful girls until a new one comes. Then he had to kill the old one with tears.
The twist in the story is having the deceased grandma taking possession of the detective's body to find the victim added color to the plot.
The twist in the story is having the deceased grandma taking possession of the detective's body to find the victim added color to the plot.
(265) Chaos in Death by J.D.Robb
This series is written by Nora Roberts under another pen name.
I must say that I prefer to read her in her romantic genre. In Chaos in Death, I detected a modern version of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. The writing is of course Nora Robert smooth, yet somehow it does not sound original. A commercial success, no doubt! I probably would not purchase and keep any one of the 39 books listed.
Yet to be fair, if you choose to pay 35.90 of my local currency you do get an entertaining read.
I must say that I prefer to read her in her romantic genre. In Chaos in Death, I detected a modern version of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. The writing is of course Nora Robert smooth, yet somehow it does not sound original. A commercial success, no doubt! I probably would not purchase and keep any one of the 39 books listed.
Yet to be fair, if you choose to pay 35.90 of my local currency you do get an entertaining read.
Sunday, July 21, 2013
(264) Beautiful faces
Elizabeth was looking at her friend's face book picture, and she commented that Kylie has a very distinctive face. I sneaked one glance and said she looked a little like my childhood friend Primrose. The busy body in me went on to say that Kylie would likely marry very well - in terms of her future husband's looks and financial circumstances.
However, there is usually one catch: really beautiful women may not have daughters or some of them may be infertile. Here I quoted Primrose is childless, my school friend Serene who has two boys, my cousin-in-law who has two sons and adopted a girl from Korea. There was Princess Diana. My own sister-in-law has two boys and could not have any more children...
It is almost as if nature conspired to make sure such beautiful genes are not passed on to the next generation. Well, my Thai cook friend told me that her elder sister in Southern Thailand has a very beautiful daughter. At age thirteen, suitors came. One serious proposal was rejected. Another good proposal came at age 14, this time the parents knew they could not say no as the prospective groom is a good guy and he came from a good family. They managed to delay the wedding until the girl was 15. But under the circumstances the poor beautiful girl never get to complete her education. You see, if the parents had objected again, some bad guy would kidnap and forced her to marry whom she abhor because the parents are arrogant in continuing to reject suitors.
However, there is usually one catch: really beautiful women may not have daughters or some of them may be infertile. Here I quoted Primrose is childless, my school friend Serene who has two boys, my cousin-in-law who has two sons and adopted a girl from Korea. There was Princess Diana. My own sister-in-law has two boys and could not have any more children...
It is almost as if nature conspired to make sure such beautiful genes are not passed on to the next generation. Well, my Thai cook friend told me that her elder sister in Southern Thailand has a very beautiful daughter. At age thirteen, suitors came. One serious proposal was rejected. Another good proposal came at age 14, this time the parents knew they could not say no as the prospective groom is a good guy and he came from a good family. They managed to delay the wedding until the girl was 15. But under the circumstances the poor beautiful girl never get to complete her education. You see, if the parents had objected again, some bad guy would kidnap and forced her to marry whom she abhor because the parents are arrogant in continuing to reject suitors.
Saturday, July 20, 2013
(263) Unwritten sex rules
In Bed of Roses by Nora Roberts, I read about the rule among girl friends that once a guy was "taken" sexually, the others are not supposed to "conquer" him. I suppose I must be both conservative and from the older generation that sex both outside and inside of marriage was not discussed even among bosom friends in my home country.
I remember when I just returned from college abroad, I was so lonely that I connected with a lady lawyer qualified from UK. We spent a lot of time together doing many things. I even caught quite a few theater shows with her and her different escorts. At that point she didn't drive and I didn't have a car. So naturally she requested whomever to date her to pick me up during the weekends. After the show, he would send me home and went on to the next destination with her.
She dated an accountant, a business manager, an architect, an engineer and well, another lawyer. At least I met all five briefly. It was the fellow lawyer that she pointed out to me. Apparently he was together with another lawyer for four years in UK. I have met his long term girl friend in another party. Interestingly, that girl married shortly after that, but with another chap. Sad to say, the lady involved has had quite a number of miscarriages after her marriage. Much later, we found out that the cause of those miscarriages : the petite and short lady has been taking over the counter birth control pills for more than four years and those pills were designed for white women seven inches taller whose body mass many kilograms heavier.
In the end the couple concerned decided to adopt a Korean orphan girl and they migrated to Australia. From this brief meeting, it seemed that course mates from British universities do date friends' ex-lived ins. Perhaps, one rule works in one country but not another. Well, the law circles in my home town are relatively small, one would have to deal with one's ex professionally and socially to a certain extent. It certainly would not help if one's ex work in the same firm or if one's seniors in the firm become married to one's ex. But then for those concerned, it would have to be all in a day's work!
I remember when I just returned from college abroad, I was so lonely that I connected with a lady lawyer qualified from UK. We spent a lot of time together doing many things. I even caught quite a few theater shows with her and her different escorts. At that point she didn't drive and I didn't have a car. So naturally she requested whomever to date her to pick me up during the weekends. After the show, he would send me home and went on to the next destination with her.
She dated an accountant, a business manager, an architect, an engineer and well, another lawyer. At least I met all five briefly. It was the fellow lawyer that she pointed out to me. Apparently he was together with another lawyer for four years in UK. I have met his long term girl friend in another party. Interestingly, that girl married shortly after that, but with another chap. Sad to say, the lady involved has had quite a number of miscarriages after her marriage. Much later, we found out that the cause of those miscarriages : the petite and short lady has been taking over the counter birth control pills for more than four years and those pills were designed for white women seven inches taller whose body mass many kilograms heavier.
In the end the couple concerned decided to adopt a Korean orphan girl and they migrated to Australia. From this brief meeting, it seemed that course mates from British universities do date friends' ex-lived ins. Perhaps, one rule works in one country but not another. Well, the law circles in my home town are relatively small, one would have to deal with one's ex professionally and socially to a certain extent. It certainly would not help if one's ex work in the same firm or if one's seniors in the firm become married to one's ex. But then for those concerned, it would have to be all in a day's work!
(262) Rage
This morning Elizabeth, my youngest, asked if she did something bad in her childhood and tried to cover up. ( The question is the result of some rather "nosy" bible study question her youth group subscribed to. I was lucky to have only accepted Christ at age 24, so the youth organization era was not in my past.)
Well! Elizabeth was tiny in size but rather hot tempered many years ago. Her closest friend Cassandra at age seven nursed some wounds for about a week until I heard from the mother. Apparently Cassandra knowingly goaded Elizabeth into scratching her at the wrist. The interesting part was Cassandra was at my house for three evenings a week but I failed to notice the bandage. Probably it was the left wrist and she was quite good at hiding it from me.
I dare say both girls were at fault. But Cassandra's mom was adamant that the young girl was teasing and goading to see how Elizabeth would react. The practical and sensible mother felt that it was a relief that it was my daughter who merely scratched the aggressor. Imagine if the victim swing a filled mineral water bottle at Cassandra's head! Of course I went home and gave Elizabeth the third degree for scratching a playmate. I taught her to turn around and walk off, it is far smarter to ignore such a person, even if it was her best friend.
Now! The reason I blog this is not to show my readers how bad or good my child was in the past or is at present. Usually the first sign I spot in a recovered learning disabled adult is the disproportionate reaction to being forced, coerced, victimized or being made to feel injustice. Well, the last time I gave my husband a good dressing down was when he asked me an ungrammatical question,"Water boil ah?" early one morning when I was bustling around trying to accomplish a few tasks in order to leave the house for the day. What he really meant was: "Did I turn off the fire and actually forgot about it?" I took it that he was unreasonable enough to expect me to drop everything to boil more drinking water. I collected the water bottles and could not find my jug. He was unwise enough to put real lemon to soak in a plastic jug. A volcano erupted and he was still trying to shake sleep off his head, all he wanted to know was if I had turned off the fire under a whistling kettle. My daughter said he deserved the shelling as he could have just stepped into the kitchen and touched the kettle rather than irritate me early in the morning.
Well! Elizabeth was tiny in size but rather hot tempered many years ago. Her closest friend Cassandra at age seven nursed some wounds for about a week until I heard from the mother. Apparently Cassandra knowingly goaded Elizabeth into scratching her at the wrist. The interesting part was Cassandra was at my house for three evenings a week but I failed to notice the bandage. Probably it was the left wrist and she was quite good at hiding it from me.
I dare say both girls were at fault. But Cassandra's mom was adamant that the young girl was teasing and goading to see how Elizabeth would react. The practical and sensible mother felt that it was a relief that it was my daughter who merely scratched the aggressor. Imagine if the victim swing a filled mineral water bottle at Cassandra's head! Of course I went home and gave Elizabeth the third degree for scratching a playmate. I taught her to turn around and walk off, it is far smarter to ignore such a person, even if it was her best friend.
Now! The reason I blog this is not to show my readers how bad or good my child was in the past or is at present. Usually the first sign I spot in a recovered learning disabled adult is the disproportionate reaction to being forced, coerced, victimized or being made to feel injustice. Well, the last time I gave my husband a good dressing down was when he asked me an ungrammatical question,"Water boil ah?" early one morning when I was bustling around trying to accomplish a few tasks in order to leave the house for the day. What he really meant was: "Did I turn off the fire and actually forgot about it?" I took it that he was unreasonable enough to expect me to drop everything to boil more drinking water. I collected the water bottles and could not find my jug. He was unwise enough to put real lemon to soak in a plastic jug. A volcano erupted and he was still trying to shake sleep off his head, all he wanted to know was if I had turned off the fire under a whistling kettle. My daughter said he deserved the shelling as he could have just stepped into the kitchen and touched the kettle rather than irritate me early in the morning.
Friday, June 28, 2013
(261) Liquid gold
I saw a program on Astro about the Italian economy. In the program they touched on the test marketing of extra virgin olive oil in Beijing.
I had a neighbor in Silver City whose cousin's year end bonus in 2000 was a cool million dollars. Of course the lady concerned lives in a mansion in a gated and guarded area with tight security. Of interest to me, the wealthy lady only uses olive oil in her kitchen. She bought different grade oil for different purposes: extra virgin for salads and ordinary olive oil for light frying.
After listening to that, I actually went to the supermarket and checked on the prices of those bottles. What I found out was that none of the different brands of liquid gold was less than two times the price of the normal cooking oil I use. And I want to point out that I am using mid range vegetable based oil. At the end I did buy one small bottle to find out why folks would pay so much for it. Among the many purposes I used it for, it was quite good as salad oil and in cooking pasta sauce. That was the last time you find olive oil in my kitchen. It is not because I don't like it, I simply feel that in order to pay for that as a daily staple, I am not willing to trim my budget to fit it in.
I had a neighbor in Silver City whose cousin's year end bonus in 2000 was a cool million dollars. Of course the lady concerned lives in a mansion in a gated and guarded area with tight security. Of interest to me, the wealthy lady only uses olive oil in her kitchen. She bought different grade oil for different purposes: extra virgin for salads and ordinary olive oil for light frying.
After listening to that, I actually went to the supermarket and checked on the prices of those bottles. What I found out was that none of the different brands of liquid gold was less than two times the price of the normal cooking oil I use. And I want to point out that I am using mid range vegetable based oil. At the end I did buy one small bottle to find out why folks would pay so much for it. Among the many purposes I used it for, it was quite good as salad oil and in cooking pasta sauce. That was the last time you find olive oil in my kitchen. It is not because I don't like it, I simply feel that in order to pay for that as a daily staple, I am not willing to trim my budget to fit it in.
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
(255) Bed of Roses by Nora Roberts
I find this book interesting as it dealt with unwritten codes among friends in the USA. Quite a bit of it reminded me of confidences exchanged in the dorm rooms in the middle of the night. It is certainly easier to tell your friends the difficult to talk about things if it is in the wee hours and there is dimmed lighting and preferably if there is someone asleep and the remaining two whispering in a dark corner.
Yes, I heard about the first kiss, first French kiss, the petting and necking in the back seat ... According to this book, girls tell. They expect each other to, and they themselves disclose. Well, in my home town, things are different. I used to have a group of close friends, after being abroad for college, I was no longer that close with most of them but one. When I unexpectedly returned from America, everyone has moved on. One got married and had two children. Another was engaged and actually went on a pre-nup trip to Europe. (Well, they have registered legally as man and wife but had not gone through the Chinese ceremonies) Another two were dating seriously with the men in their lives. The rest were busy with jobs and dating around. I actually found myself a whole new set of friends and acquaintances to do things with. I must have missed out on the hot dates and the hot news of the old set because I was away. But, one incident stood out: our advertising consultant managed to grill an errant friend and found out why she chose to go work in Papua.
Now, this errant friend has always been close mouth and kept her own counsel. She has a stubborn streak and would refuse to tell if she so decides. However, she did not count on our media research friend's skills developed by countless consumer research projects funded by international companies. There our advertising consultant small talked and asked more than sixty seemingly unrelated questions. Those questions were of two types, random ones and the related ones. By being relax and answering those questions, the end result is telling. Even if some answers were lies, our consultant could sieve them out and ask from completely different angles.
So, the consultant taxed her brain cells and came to one conclusion: our dear friend was heart broken with her hot boy friend in Borneo. While the relationship was going well, she must have slept with him (that was her first, we were certain) thinking she would eventually marry him. But she must have found out something pretty bad about him and she wanted out. Just a simple break up would not do, seemed like he was not willing to let her go and she resorted to being transferred to Papua, of all places! I'll end on a happy note, she is the proud mother of one son with a Thai husband. Of course her son is like sixteen years younger than mine as she took her time to select her lucky man and then she has some difficulty conceiving in her late thirties.
Yes, I heard about the first kiss, first French kiss, the petting and necking in the back seat ... According to this book, girls tell. They expect each other to, and they themselves disclose. Well, in my home town, things are different. I used to have a group of close friends, after being abroad for college, I was no longer that close with most of them but one. When I unexpectedly returned from America, everyone has moved on. One got married and had two children. Another was engaged and actually went on a pre-nup trip to Europe. (Well, they have registered legally as man and wife but had not gone through the Chinese ceremonies) Another two were dating seriously with the men in their lives. The rest were busy with jobs and dating around. I actually found myself a whole new set of friends and acquaintances to do things with. I must have missed out on the hot dates and the hot news of the old set because I was away. But, one incident stood out: our advertising consultant managed to grill an errant friend and found out why she chose to go work in Papua.
Now, this errant friend has always been close mouth and kept her own counsel. She has a stubborn streak and would refuse to tell if she so decides. However, she did not count on our media research friend's skills developed by countless consumer research projects funded by international companies. There our advertising consultant small talked and asked more than sixty seemingly unrelated questions. Those questions were of two types, random ones and the related ones. By being relax and answering those questions, the end result is telling. Even if some answers were lies, our consultant could sieve them out and ask from completely different angles.
So, the consultant taxed her brain cells and came to one conclusion: our dear friend was heart broken with her hot boy friend in Borneo. While the relationship was going well, she must have slept with him (that was her first, we were certain) thinking she would eventually marry him. But she must have found out something pretty bad about him and she wanted out. Just a simple break up would not do, seemed like he was not willing to let her go and she resorted to being transferred to Papua, of all places! I'll end on a happy note, she is the proud mother of one son with a Thai husband. Of course her son is like sixteen years younger than mine as she took her time to select her lucky man and then she has some difficulty conceiving in her late thirties.
Thursday, June 20, 2013
(254) Himalaya by Michael Palin
I happen to have an elder brother who continually buys and reads travel books and then generously passes them to me.
This is one book which describes places that I wish I could go. But of course I have not the financial means to travel to such far off the beaten track countries. Even if I have a sudden windfall that solves the money angle, I do not have the necessary mobility to tackle mountain paths.
It was a happy few days that I spent living my armchair traveling through Palin's eyes. I particularly want to visit Bhutan, the country with clear, clean air that is still made up of many acres of virgin temperate forest.
One day I might just go and visit a few friends who live in Kunming and add on a side trip to Lijiang. With really cheap fare offered by Air Asia, dreams do come true!
This is one book which describes places that I wish I could go. But of course I have not the financial means to travel to such far off the beaten track countries. Even if I have a sudden windfall that solves the money angle, I do not have the necessary mobility to tackle mountain paths.
It was a happy few days that I spent living my armchair traveling through Palin's eyes. I particularly want to visit Bhutan, the country with clear, clean air that is still made up of many acres of virgin temperate forest.
One day I might just go and visit a few friends who live in Kunming and add on a side trip to Lijiang. With really cheap fare offered by Air Asia, dreams do come true!
Wednesday, June 19, 2013
(253) To hear God
The other day Elizabeth was lamenting that she could not hear God. Since Michael went for YWAM (Youth With A Mission) and was trained daily in his Discipleship Training Course to wait for God's still small voice, she made one of those rare hand phone calls to pick his brain. But for someone who has yet to hear that voice, even what he said was too stupendous.
The summer after my college graduation, I was living in a small town working in a small outfit. Every Friday night a very kind couple would pick me up for what they called home fellowship. I distinctly remember one testimony (story about one's walk with God) of a quiet and serious old man. He was deliberating over an important decision in his life as a young believer and was losing much sleep over it. One co-worker told him to seek God - meaning read the bible and ask God to speak to him. At that time, my fellowship group member was a young man feeling rather foolish when he proceeded to carry out the act of seeking God. He knelt down and asked God to speak to him concerning his problem with scripture verses. Then he thanked God and got up to sit at the study desk to read the next portion of scripture from his reading list. Lo and behold, one verse lit up and jumped at him. He could not believe his own eyes and actually went to wash his face. After a five minute break, he went back to the same line: the very same verse jumped out at him again. Then he knew that was God's answer to his problem. He thanked God aloud and went on to apply that verse to his problem. For indeed God hears and he answers his children.
A week later I was asking God what should I do : to continue in the same town or go on to a nearby University town? To work or to go to summer school? The answer came that very night, I was reading some page in the Old Testament. Three words jumped at me and was blinking: Return to Samaria. At that point I did not know where Samaria was or even who the Samaritans were. But the meaning was clear: God wanted me to return to my home country. I remember telling God that since seven years old I meant to find a way to go to America and stay on there. Although I wanted very much to be obedient to him, but would he change my heart. That He did, He changed my heart within three days: overruling a decision that I held in my heart for seventeen years. More than that, I still have three months to seek for employment, an additional visa extension of six months to be applied for. On top of all that, my host couple generously offered me a scholarship to do my Masters degree. At the very same time, an eligible pilot in the Arm Forces was courting me with my host family's permission. Despite all that, I did return home. Yes, my earthly father told me in no uncertain terms that I was stupid to return at that time. He said I could have negotiated with God and gotten my second degree first. Moreover, he said that to be married to a US pilot would mean I could travel with him to many bases around the world. But I suppose what he said was true, yet to obey is better than sacrifice. And what human could see is so very limited. To God, He transcends time and space. Thirty odd years later, it is proven that God had my well being in His mind when He asked me to return. I may not have a second degree today, neither have I traveled as much as I could have wished for; yet I am content with who I am today.
The summer after my college graduation, I was living in a small town working in a small outfit. Every Friday night a very kind couple would pick me up for what they called home fellowship. I distinctly remember one testimony (story about one's walk with God) of a quiet and serious old man. He was deliberating over an important decision in his life as a young believer and was losing much sleep over it. One co-worker told him to seek God - meaning read the bible and ask God to speak to him. At that time, my fellowship group member was a young man feeling rather foolish when he proceeded to carry out the act of seeking God. He knelt down and asked God to speak to him concerning his problem with scripture verses. Then he thanked God and got up to sit at the study desk to read the next portion of scripture from his reading list. Lo and behold, one verse lit up and jumped at him. He could not believe his own eyes and actually went to wash his face. After a five minute break, he went back to the same line: the very same verse jumped out at him again. Then he knew that was God's answer to his problem. He thanked God aloud and went on to apply that verse to his problem. For indeed God hears and he answers his children.
A week later I was asking God what should I do : to continue in the same town or go on to a nearby University town? To work or to go to summer school? The answer came that very night, I was reading some page in the Old Testament. Three words jumped at me and was blinking: Return to Samaria. At that point I did not know where Samaria was or even who the Samaritans were. But the meaning was clear: God wanted me to return to my home country. I remember telling God that since seven years old I meant to find a way to go to America and stay on there. Although I wanted very much to be obedient to him, but would he change my heart. That He did, He changed my heart within three days: overruling a decision that I held in my heart for seventeen years. More than that, I still have three months to seek for employment, an additional visa extension of six months to be applied for. On top of all that, my host couple generously offered me a scholarship to do my Masters degree. At the very same time, an eligible pilot in the Arm Forces was courting me with my host family's permission. Despite all that, I did return home. Yes, my earthly father told me in no uncertain terms that I was stupid to return at that time. He said I could have negotiated with God and gotten my second degree first. Moreover, he said that to be married to a US pilot would mean I could travel with him to many bases around the world. But I suppose what he said was true, yet to obey is better than sacrifice. And what human could see is so very limited. To God, He transcends time and space. Thirty odd years later, it is proven that God had my well being in His mind when He asked me to return. I may not have a second degree today, neither have I traveled as much as I could have wished for; yet I am content with who I am today.
Thursday, May 2, 2013
(249) Red by Ted Dekker
Red - Second Part of The Circle Series - The Heroic Rescue
In this book we have Justin (Elyon) being betrayed and put to death by a most inhumane method of drowning. Meanwhile 21st century earth was spinning out of control to imminent mass death and nuclear strikes and counter strikes.
In the final pages of this book, twelve adults and five children followed the footsteps of Justin in choosing to be drowned in the red water of the lake. Miraculously, they did not die but emerged cleansed from the dreaded skin disease the desert dwellers had. Strangely, those forest dwellers who used to dip daily in the green lake to escape from the dreaded skin disease were all affected by the disease in their brains to stay away from the lake water which by washing could no longer heal them.
It is all a paradox: with Jehovah, one chooses death of self in order to have new life. A real believer must hold his or her life loosely as in losing one's earthly life would lead to gaining eternal life. It somehow does not seem logical nor smart. Therefore, God chooses the fools to shame the wise. And only the sick would need the Great Physician. That is why we find that sometimes Buddhists and Taoists actually are much nicer people than some Christians in many churches. Perhaps the relatively more righteous people outside of the sheep fold feel less of a need for forgiveness and cleansing. When I was so sick that I could hardly stand up at age 31, only two Christian sisters could and would comfort me. Most judged me and told me that there must be sin in my life, my illness was judgement from God. The rest shunned me, as if by walking near me or by having contact would mean they would catch my ailment.
Looking back, it was a difficult test. It must have been by the grace of God that I did not walk away from the Church or from God. Now that it has been over, I become a person that would be able to sit for hours to listen, understand, cry, and to pray with any one whom God called me to be alongside to help. It was like undergoing the refining fire, it was terrible to be burnt for the duration. But the end result is good for me and for others.
In this book we have Justin (Elyon) being betrayed and put to death by a most inhumane method of drowning. Meanwhile 21st century earth was spinning out of control to imminent mass death and nuclear strikes and counter strikes.
In the final pages of this book, twelve adults and five children followed the footsteps of Justin in choosing to be drowned in the red water of the lake. Miraculously, they did not die but emerged cleansed from the dreaded skin disease the desert dwellers had. Strangely, those forest dwellers who used to dip daily in the green lake to escape from the dreaded skin disease were all affected by the disease in their brains to stay away from the lake water which by washing could no longer heal them.
It is all a paradox: with Jehovah, one chooses death of self in order to have new life. A real believer must hold his or her life loosely as in losing one's earthly life would lead to gaining eternal life. It somehow does not seem logical nor smart. Therefore, God chooses the fools to shame the wise. And only the sick would need the Great Physician. That is why we find that sometimes Buddhists and Taoists actually are much nicer people than some Christians in many churches. Perhaps the relatively more righteous people outside of the sheep fold feel less of a need for forgiveness and cleansing. When I was so sick that I could hardly stand up at age 31, only two Christian sisters could and would comfort me. Most judged me and told me that there must be sin in my life, my illness was judgement from God. The rest shunned me, as if by walking near me or by having contact would mean they would catch my ailment.
Looking back, it was a difficult test. It must have been by the grace of God that I did not walk away from the Church or from God. Now that it has been over, I become a person that would be able to sit for hours to listen, understand, cry, and to pray with any one whom God called me to be alongside to help. It was like undergoing the refining fire, it was terrible to be burnt for the duration. But the end result is good for me and for others.
(248) Black by Ted Dekker
Black - First part of The Circle Series - The birth of evil
This book reminds me of The Time Traveler's Wife. Thomas Hunter is like the time traveler. The major difference being the fact that when Tom is asleep in America in the twenty first century, he was asleep and dreaming of another world in a different time and vice verse.
From the abandoned son of an army chaplain, Tom became an internationally known villain who kidnapped a virologist in Bangkok. The new vaccine that was just unveiled was wrenched into the bad guys' hands to become a mutated virus capable of killing billions on earth within three weeks. It was a good plot, full of suspense!
The colored forest and the innocent long living people who enjoyed the fruits and water bestowed by Elyon (the creator) paralleled the garden of Eden. Those evil black bats that have no power over the innocent people are like the fallen angels before Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit.
After being a practicing Christian for more than twenty years, I am afraid I still cannot see why nor am I able to explain fully why God created humans who are given the choice of good and evil. Yes, books explained that men cannot be truly free without such a choice. But look at what the choice led to: violence, suffering, perverse actions, evil ... But how can the created being question the creator? I bow to the deep knowing in my heart that God loves me and everyone else in this world. Yet even before the foundation of this world was laid, God already knew who would choose Him and who would reject Him. Even knowing that, He sent His son Jesus to die for our sins so that we can find a way to go back to Him. My son Kenneth said that reading this series (Black, Red, White and Green) enables him to understand Genesis (the first book of the Bible) better. I am still reading the second book Red, I cannot claim anything of this sort yet. Though I went right to the back and read both the given endings.
This book reminds me of The Time Traveler's Wife. Thomas Hunter is like the time traveler. The major difference being the fact that when Tom is asleep in America in the twenty first century, he was asleep and dreaming of another world in a different time and vice verse.
From the abandoned son of an army chaplain, Tom became an internationally known villain who kidnapped a virologist in Bangkok. The new vaccine that was just unveiled was wrenched into the bad guys' hands to become a mutated virus capable of killing billions on earth within three weeks. It was a good plot, full of suspense!
The colored forest and the innocent long living people who enjoyed the fruits and water bestowed by Elyon (the creator) paralleled the garden of Eden. Those evil black bats that have no power over the innocent people are like the fallen angels before Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit.
After being a practicing Christian for more than twenty years, I am afraid I still cannot see why nor am I able to explain fully why God created humans who are given the choice of good and evil. Yes, books explained that men cannot be truly free without such a choice. But look at what the choice led to: violence, suffering, perverse actions, evil ... But how can the created being question the creator? I bow to the deep knowing in my heart that God loves me and everyone else in this world. Yet even before the foundation of this world was laid, God already knew who would choose Him and who would reject Him. Even knowing that, He sent His son Jesus to die for our sins so that we can find a way to go back to Him. My son Kenneth said that reading this series (Black, Red, White and Green) enables him to understand Genesis (the first book of the Bible) better. I am still reading the second book Red, I cannot claim anything of this sort yet. Though I went right to the back and read both the given endings.
Friday, April 26, 2013
(246) Cullinarily challenged
The organizer called up, assuming that the fried vermicelli my family promised would be cooked by me. Honestly, I only cook three possible types of food for pot bless: fried rice, fried wanton and Chinese spinach because I have done it thousands of times that these are my fail safe food.
When my husband was courting me, I confessed that I am willing to cook for my future children but cooking is at the very bottom of my list of life skills. He said never mind, for he is a talented and great amateur cook; we would never starve. Hence we have the relationship that I prepare the food and I do the cleaning up but he would artistically cook up whatever happened to be available in the house. For I hate to shop too, my idea of nourishing myself would be to swallow some desiccated food with mugs of water and then able to not be hungry for the next 6 hours.
Genes do not lie, I look at Elizabeth attempts at cooking and realize that God has been more than kind to me. At least I could fry decent omelets and judge well how cooked or whether instant noodle is just cooked and crunchy. And interestingly Michael could whip up sinfully delicious food from funny combinations of ingredients in my fridge. Crystal is just at the stage of frying up all kinds of process meat and beginning to brew some old fashion soups her employer likes. She is in the business of geriatric care.
Just in case you think that the clutz in the kitchen is not too hot in other spheres of life, I happen to have won quite a number of full scholarships in the earlier years. Elizabeth is articulate and quite accomplished in singing, acting, music making and quite a good student if you look at her track record. Believe it or not, we are not adept at multi-step sequences like cooking. Elizabeth and I would be equally hapless in the chemistry lab. But I could have chosen to continue with a Masters in IT concentrating on expert systems, it might not have been as fun as working on children's brains and character; though the former would have been equally challenging as well. Elizabeth's professors are telling her to consider going for a Masters as she is gifted in academic writing. We will see what God has in store for her.
When my husband was courting me, I confessed that I am willing to cook for my future children but cooking is at the very bottom of my list of life skills. He said never mind, for he is a talented and great amateur cook; we would never starve. Hence we have the relationship that I prepare the food and I do the cleaning up but he would artistically cook up whatever happened to be available in the house. For I hate to shop too, my idea of nourishing myself would be to swallow some desiccated food with mugs of water and then able to not be hungry for the next 6 hours.
Genes do not lie, I look at Elizabeth attempts at cooking and realize that God has been more than kind to me. At least I could fry decent omelets and judge well how cooked or whether instant noodle is just cooked and crunchy. And interestingly Michael could whip up sinfully delicious food from funny combinations of ingredients in my fridge. Crystal is just at the stage of frying up all kinds of process meat and beginning to brew some old fashion soups her employer likes. She is in the business of geriatric care.
Just in case you think that the clutz in the kitchen is not too hot in other spheres of life, I happen to have won quite a number of full scholarships in the earlier years. Elizabeth is articulate and quite accomplished in singing, acting, music making and quite a good student if you look at her track record. Believe it or not, we are not adept at multi-step sequences like cooking. Elizabeth and I would be equally hapless in the chemistry lab. But I could have chosen to continue with a Masters in IT concentrating on expert systems, it might not have been as fun as working on children's brains and character; though the former would have been equally challenging as well. Elizabeth's professors are telling her to consider going for a Masters as she is gifted in academic writing. We will see what God has in store for her.
(244) No hope?
Today I was hopping channels among BBC, CNN, CCTV and Al Jazeera. The image that struck me was an interview with a small family in Spain. The father is jobless, the mother is unemployed and the boy is still young.
According to the man of the family, he and his wife could find no job. His parents ended up helping his family. He can see no hope for his son. What a bind for the present three generations! No wonder a fair amount of people migrate from Spain to South America. What a predicament to be in! For urban folks, there is not even land for the poor to till and grow food.
What went wrong?
I can see little human solution. One country after another went into economic crisis. But surely the Almighty who created us has good plans for each country and each individual. We have to turn to Him and He is just a prayer away.
According to the man of the family, he and his wife could find no job. His parents ended up helping his family. He can see no hope for his son. What a bind for the present three generations! No wonder a fair amount of people migrate from Spain to South America. What a predicament to be in! For urban folks, there is not even land for the poor to till and grow food.
What went wrong?
I can see little human solution. One country after another went into economic crisis. But surely the Almighty who created us has good plans for each country and each individual. We have to turn to Him and He is just a prayer away.
Thursday, April 25, 2013
(243) Overcoming pain in marriages
My area of passion is on children having learning disability. It is quite effortless to remember cases and trivia as long as they belong to my category.
For my friend, it is on marriage and divorce. Whatever anyone told her, as long as it is related to either marriage or divorce, she would remember it for life. She was rattling a list of facts while I listened on: six years have passed since she left her husband, now they have reconciled. It is like falling in love for a second time with the same person. She remembered that a speaker said that it took him six years for him to really forgive his adulterous but repentant wife and have the marriage on an even footing. Then one of my friend's friend also said that she suffered for six years, after she confessed that she had an illicit relationship abroad while she was working on her post graduate studies. Her husband did not want to end the marriage but it was hard for him to be intimate with her for a long time.
Interesting! I have not come across a single woman in this country who would admit to cheating on her husband. But as a college student in USA, I used to regularly listen to all kinds of different experiences, heart ache, disaster on male-female relationships. Perhaps my current status of being a married woman does not invite confidential sharing.
For my friend, it is on marriage and divorce. Whatever anyone told her, as long as it is related to either marriage or divorce, she would remember it for life. She was rattling a list of facts while I listened on: six years have passed since she left her husband, now they have reconciled. It is like falling in love for a second time with the same person. She remembered that a speaker said that it took him six years for him to really forgive his adulterous but repentant wife and have the marriage on an even footing. Then one of my friend's friend also said that she suffered for six years, after she confessed that she had an illicit relationship abroad while she was working on her post graduate studies. Her husband did not want to end the marriage but it was hard for him to be intimate with her for a long time.
Interesting! I have not come across a single woman in this country who would admit to cheating on her husband. But as a college student in USA, I used to regularly listen to all kinds of different experiences, heart ache, disaster on male-female relationships. Perhaps my current status of being a married woman does not invite confidential sharing.
Wednesday, April 24, 2013
(242) Money is a good servant but bad master
One mother in Silver City bought a four bedroom house before she passed on. Her three unmarried daughters stayed in it. A few years back one married daughter came back from Belgium and occupied the fourth bedroom.
The eldest of these sisters is eighty years old while the youngest is already seventy. Interestingly the one which came back from abroad has three million dollars in the bank but continues to share the house with her not so wealthy sisters. It is amazing that with such liquid wealth in the bank, she would count her dollars and her pennies. These four women would argue and quarrel about amounts as small as a few dollars in house hold expenses.
Meanwhile, the married sister's husband made sure he came at least once a year and be with his wife so that she could not divorce him. He is waiting for her to be senile so that he could declare her incompetent and grab her wealth to return to Belgium. There is inherently nothing wrong with being wealthy. But in this case the wealth is not doing much good for the owner, her husband and her sisters now. No one trusts another. Each one check and recheck bills to make sure the others are not making them pay a penny more. While the money accrues interest in the bank, five people are watching each other but no one is touching even the interest as our careful married woman survives on a small part of her monthly pension.
A few years back two dead bodies were found in a Silver City house. The daughter who was in her fifties died suddenly in front of the TV. Her mother, who was bed bound, starved to death. The house land line telephone was just a matter of ten feet away from her hospital bed in the sitting room. Later relatives found two million dollars in fixed deposit in a local bank. Those two women lived very simply, without a car and with no household helper. Looking at the house and the furnishing, one would think they were destitute.
Money in the hands of wise owners can do much good, miserly people who are slaves to money would live like paupers until the day they die.
The eldest of these sisters is eighty years old while the youngest is already seventy. Interestingly the one which came back from abroad has three million dollars in the bank but continues to share the house with her not so wealthy sisters. It is amazing that with such liquid wealth in the bank, she would count her dollars and her pennies. These four women would argue and quarrel about amounts as small as a few dollars in house hold expenses.
Meanwhile, the married sister's husband made sure he came at least once a year and be with his wife so that she could not divorce him. He is waiting for her to be senile so that he could declare her incompetent and grab her wealth to return to Belgium. There is inherently nothing wrong with being wealthy. But in this case the wealth is not doing much good for the owner, her husband and her sisters now. No one trusts another. Each one check and recheck bills to make sure the others are not making them pay a penny more. While the money accrues interest in the bank, five people are watching each other but no one is touching even the interest as our careful married woman survives on a small part of her monthly pension.
A few years back two dead bodies were found in a Silver City house. The daughter who was in her fifties died suddenly in front of the TV. Her mother, who was bed bound, starved to death. The house land line telephone was just a matter of ten feet away from her hospital bed in the sitting room. Later relatives found two million dollars in fixed deposit in a local bank. Those two women lived very simply, without a car and with no household helper. Looking at the house and the furnishing, one would think they were destitute.
Money in the hands of wise owners can do much good, miserly people who are slaves to money would live like paupers until the day they die.
Tuesday, April 23, 2013
(241-) Nightmares
A friend's teenage son had fever and woke up from a terrible nightmare with the image of having his legs dismembered and thrown over his head, the pain was sharp and he was frightened.
I am not any authority on dreams. After saying that the idea of the Boston Marathon came to mind. After the blasts many people had to have their leg or legs amputated. I saw the video images on International news repeatedly as I tried to make sense of the violence. If the teenage boy has been exposed to those images or even more explicit ones on the internet, it is little wonder that at night his mind tried to process and make sense of the blood shed.
One of my more sensitive daughters did have a vivid dream that she and her best friend were in line - those who refuse the mark of the beast would have their head chopped off. In her dream she was encouraging her best friend to go through momentary pain. In a sense that dream changed her world view, she now sees that her main purpose in life is to be encouraging her friend (s) to choose God. I am not trying to discount her conviction. But I see that our brain is like a Hollywood movie house, whatever goes through the brain during the day would be sorted and might be distorted in the night for filing purposes. Not all dreams would come true nor should every dream be taken seriously.
I am not any authority on dreams. After saying that the idea of the Boston Marathon came to mind. After the blasts many people had to have their leg or legs amputated. I saw the video images on International news repeatedly as I tried to make sense of the violence. If the teenage boy has been exposed to those images or even more explicit ones on the internet, it is little wonder that at night his mind tried to process and make sense of the blood shed.
One of my more sensitive daughters did have a vivid dream that she and her best friend were in line - those who refuse the mark of the beast would have their head chopped off. In her dream she was encouraging her best friend to go through momentary pain. In a sense that dream changed her world view, she now sees that her main purpose in life is to be encouraging her friend (s) to choose God. I am not trying to discount her conviction. But I see that our brain is like a Hollywood movie house, whatever goes through the brain during the day would be sorted and might be distorted in the night for filing purposes. Not all dreams would come true nor should every dream be taken seriously.
(240-) Language acquisition
Many years ago I used to teach remedial English in both public universities and a private college. As a rule, I would keep my six years of elementary Chinese education from my students. After I earned their respect, I still would pretend I don't understand Mandarin. But on the last lecture I would reveal the fact that I crossed over from being Chinese educated to living in the English educated group. Often, students asked me how I did it. It took genuine desire and years of discipline application.
Below I list the good habits one can form for the purpose of language learning:-
Means channels Media
eye read newspaper books magazines
ear hearing radio CD talking books
mouth speak friends teachers strangers
read aloud news poem stories
sing pop songs movie songs
hand write letters diary journal
eye/ear video U tube VCD/DVD TV movies
From age 12 to 21, I would have a piece of cardboard pinned on my bedroom wall. There would be drawn on it a chart for 3 months. Let's say that for the following three months I aspired to read :
1. The editorial page of the Sunday English newspaper
2. One fiction per week
3. One magazine per month
There would be boxes on my chart to tick and document if I do live up to expectation for that duration of three months.
As for hearing, I used to have a little transistor radio that I turned to English station as I did my home work in the afternoons. At night, I would listen to one hour of either BBC or Voice of America short wave broadcast at 11 pm to 12 am in bed. Forty years ago we used cassettes, I could hardly afford to buy anyway. There were no talking books on sale then. But on week end nights, I recall BBC used to put up plays and literature excerpts read by authors. Similarly I would record the hourly listening day by day.
When it came to speaking, it took conscious effort to find friends who would speak to me in English. At first I would open my mouth to talk to Indians girls I met in bus stops. From experience, they are usually English speaking if they are dressed in western clothes. I would join societies and carefully nurture friendships with girls who spoke English as a default language. Another group is teachers who appreciate students who venture into the staff room to ask them questions about class work.
Singing along to pop songs is a very fun way of learning colloquial English. I also used to watch musical and tried to find ways to copy the lyrics from friends. For example, I was singling "My favorite things" long before I understand individual words used by Julie Andrew in that song.
I had pen pals and wrote monthly letters. Starting from all Chinese entries in my Grade 6 diary, it changed gradually to all English entries in Grade 9. For my literature courses in college, I was keeping journal. Lately, I was laughing at the TV programs my children downloaded from the internet. A good example is the international students taught by Mr Brown in Mind Your Language. By borrowing DVD movies, I still make attempts to improve my listening skills. With the advent of 24 hours TV broadcast, watching National Geographic and Discovery Science would be wonderful avenues to improve our vocabulary.
This proverb is always true: where there is the will, we will find a way to achieve our heart's desire.
Below I list the good habits one can form for the purpose of language learning:-
Means channels Media
eye read newspaper books magazines
ear hearing radio CD talking books
mouth speak friends teachers strangers
read aloud news poem stories
sing pop songs movie songs
hand write letters diary journal
eye/ear video U tube VCD/DVD TV movies
From age 12 to 21, I would have a piece of cardboard pinned on my bedroom wall. There would be drawn on it a chart for 3 months. Let's say that for the following three months I aspired to read :
1. The editorial page of the Sunday English newspaper
2. One fiction per week
3. One magazine per month
There would be boxes on my chart to tick and document if I do live up to expectation for that duration of three months.
As for hearing, I used to have a little transistor radio that I turned to English station as I did my home work in the afternoons. At night, I would listen to one hour of either BBC or Voice of America short wave broadcast at 11 pm to 12 am in bed. Forty years ago we used cassettes, I could hardly afford to buy anyway. There were no talking books on sale then. But on week end nights, I recall BBC used to put up plays and literature excerpts read by authors. Similarly I would record the hourly listening day by day.
When it came to speaking, it took conscious effort to find friends who would speak to me in English. At first I would open my mouth to talk to Indians girls I met in bus stops. From experience, they are usually English speaking if they are dressed in western clothes. I would join societies and carefully nurture friendships with girls who spoke English as a default language. Another group is teachers who appreciate students who venture into the staff room to ask them questions about class work.
Singing along to pop songs is a very fun way of learning colloquial English. I also used to watch musical and tried to find ways to copy the lyrics from friends. For example, I was singling "My favorite things" long before I understand individual words used by Julie Andrew in that song.
I had pen pals and wrote monthly letters. Starting from all Chinese entries in my Grade 6 diary, it changed gradually to all English entries in Grade 9. For my literature courses in college, I was keeping journal. Lately, I was laughing at the TV programs my children downloaded from the internet. A good example is the international students taught by Mr Brown in Mind Your Language. By borrowing DVD movies, I still make attempts to improve my listening skills. With the advent of 24 hours TV broadcast, watching National Geographic and Discovery Science would be wonderful avenues to improve our vocabulary.
This proverb is always true: where there is the will, we will find a way to achieve our heart's desire.
Monday, April 22, 2013
(239) Human suffering in Greece
One of my brothers work in a Bank. We were discussing about such countries like Greece, Cyprus, Spain, France ... According to him, the problem in Cyprus is unique because it is part of the European Union. While it might not work for Cyprus to opt out of EU, it is not feasible for the single common currency to keep bailing out one country after another.
He read somewhere that one Greek Headmaster said that there were children in the city that went to school with no food in the tummy. Parents could have been unemployed for at least two years, have little marketable skills and could no longer subsist on social security that have been cut drastically. People who were formerly civil servants usually do not upgrade themselves thinking they have an iron rice bowl (unbreakable). I find urban children going hungry shocking. On our TV screen we see that refugees in Africa were fed. In fact I just saw ethnic Muslim Myanmarese walked into refugee camps on one of the International news channels. Sure, during WW2, my mother's family(one widow with five children) survived on sweet potatoes and other roots. But at least they had one meal daily. My father was old enough to run errands for the Japanese soldiers, his family had rice to eat throughout the Japanese occupation.
Pulling my view finder from Greece to my country, we also have a huge civil servant population. Similarly our debt to earning ratio is not exactly healthy. I certainly hope that the coming election would change deep seated problems like that so that we would not face in the future what Greece faces now.
He read somewhere that one Greek Headmaster said that there were children in the city that went to school with no food in the tummy. Parents could have been unemployed for at least two years, have little marketable skills and could no longer subsist on social security that have been cut drastically. People who were formerly civil servants usually do not upgrade themselves thinking they have an iron rice bowl (unbreakable). I find urban children going hungry shocking. On our TV screen we see that refugees in Africa were fed. In fact I just saw ethnic Muslim Myanmarese walked into refugee camps on one of the International news channels. Sure, during WW2, my mother's family(one widow with five children) survived on sweet potatoes and other roots. But at least they had one meal daily. My father was old enough to run errands for the Japanese soldiers, his family had rice to eat throughout the Japanese occupation.
Pulling my view finder from Greece to my country, we also have a huge civil servant population. Similarly our debt to earning ratio is not exactly healthy. I certainly hope that the coming election would change deep seated problems like that so that we would not face in the future what Greece faces now.
(238) Lost eternally
One of Elizabeth (my youngest)'s uni mate was drown a week ago. Details were sketchy: she went to use a private college's pool, somehow she knocked her head and fainted. Once she became a dead weight at the bottom of the pool, whoever present was not strong enough to lift her up.
What really upset Elizabeth was that she actually shared bus seats on a uni trip with the deceased a few months ago. She knew the deceased was a Buddhist but she did not attempt to share the good news at the first meeting. However, Elizabeth did have a long chat with her and perhaps did conversationally mentioned that the former is a practicing Christian. After the sad news of her passing, Elizabeth went into a self-bashing mode, blaming herself for the lost opportunity.
Somehow, I see things much differently. My family was more Taoist than Buddhist. Friends have been sharing the good news with me on countless occasions for like fourteen years before the opportune moment when I saw the light. In fact, I used to hate those folks who bashed my head with their bibles, in a manner of speaking. Perhaps if those Christ Ambassadors were less active, I would have not been forced to sit in the opposition corner for so many years. While I knew those statues my parents worshiped to were not God, I strongly resented the facts that born again Christians called them idols. I honestly believe that God woos each person along the high ways and the by ways. I am not ashamed of my belief and would gladly share when someone wants to hear. But I certainly would not force, push or share with any and everyone I meet.
What really upset Elizabeth was that she actually shared bus seats on a uni trip with the deceased a few months ago. She knew the deceased was a Buddhist but she did not attempt to share the good news at the first meeting. However, Elizabeth did have a long chat with her and perhaps did conversationally mentioned that the former is a practicing Christian. After the sad news of her passing, Elizabeth went into a self-bashing mode, blaming herself for the lost opportunity.
Somehow, I see things much differently. My family was more Taoist than Buddhist. Friends have been sharing the good news with me on countless occasions for like fourteen years before the opportune moment when I saw the light. In fact, I used to hate those folks who bashed my head with their bibles, in a manner of speaking. Perhaps if those Christ Ambassadors were less active, I would have not been forced to sit in the opposition corner for so many years. While I knew those statues my parents worshiped to were not God, I strongly resented the facts that born again Christians called them idols. I honestly believe that God woos each person along the high ways and the by ways. I am not ashamed of my belief and would gladly share when someone wants to hear. But I certainly would not force, push or share with any and everyone I meet.
Saturday, April 20, 2013
(237) The Report Card by Andrew Clements
This is a Scholastic book written by the author of Frindle - a two-million-copy bestseller.
The story tells of a hidden genius call Nora. She was able to appear normal from 2.5 years old to fifth grade. That shows she not only is high in her IQ, she must be full of EQ (emotional quotient) too. Most parents would love to have really smart children, but I suppose it is not easy to bring up a genius in a balanced way.
In the book a very wise teacher asked Nora why she was given such high IQ. It would probably take Nora the rest of her life to find out. I probably would not test as high on the scale as Nora. In those days I doubt any of my teachers have access to any IQ test. But I remember cooking my scores in primary school so that I don't stand out like a sore thumb. From Grade Three to Six I alternated at First and Second place with my Assistant Monitor. When he begged hard enough, I would score just low enough for him to be first in class - after all, he claimed that his father would beat him for coming second. The the next year he would boast and get on my nerve - then I would make sure I outscore him by about thirty marks in the final exam so he would come second again.
Now I can see that I was given a brain that is able to absorb facts and incidences and file them most systematically away. As Kenneth said, I don't just have on-line and off-line storage, I seemed to have the ability to instantly recall things stored away from any part of my life -- whether real life experiences, things I heard or things I read at will. This come in handy in my teaching life, I could tell interesting, one of a kind stories at the drop of a pin to wake up nodding students. Most of these stories are true too, maybe with a few minor facts altered so that the people involved would remain anonymous. There is a purpose in telling real stories, apart from entertainment. Usually I would ask for the moral lesson and more often than not, at least one person would give me the correct or an acceptable answer.
Since I have not continued in teaching for the past seven years, I have noticed that this unique memory serves me really well when people I spend time listening to tell me facts or experiences that they have never shared with anyone before. Keeping in mind that each person is unique, and the fact that I do not have a psychology degree nor am I a qualified counselor, to be able to come up with an upbeat, encouraging response use up every bit of my immense storage files.
The story tells of a hidden genius call Nora. She was able to appear normal from 2.5 years old to fifth grade. That shows she not only is high in her IQ, she must be full of EQ (emotional quotient) too. Most parents would love to have really smart children, but I suppose it is not easy to bring up a genius in a balanced way.
In the book a very wise teacher asked Nora why she was given such high IQ. It would probably take Nora the rest of her life to find out. I probably would not test as high on the scale as Nora. In those days I doubt any of my teachers have access to any IQ test. But I remember cooking my scores in primary school so that I don't stand out like a sore thumb. From Grade Three to Six I alternated at First and Second place with my Assistant Monitor. When he begged hard enough, I would score just low enough for him to be first in class - after all, he claimed that his father would beat him for coming second. The the next year he would boast and get on my nerve - then I would make sure I outscore him by about thirty marks in the final exam so he would come second again.
Now I can see that I was given a brain that is able to absorb facts and incidences and file them most systematically away. As Kenneth said, I don't just have on-line and off-line storage, I seemed to have the ability to instantly recall things stored away from any part of my life -- whether real life experiences, things I heard or things I read at will. This come in handy in my teaching life, I could tell interesting, one of a kind stories at the drop of a pin to wake up nodding students. Most of these stories are true too, maybe with a few minor facts altered so that the people involved would remain anonymous. There is a purpose in telling real stories, apart from entertainment. Usually I would ask for the moral lesson and more often than not, at least one person would give me the correct or an acceptable answer.
Since I have not continued in teaching for the past seven years, I have noticed that this unique memory serves me really well when people I spend time listening to tell me facts or experiences that they have never shared with anyone before. Keeping in mind that each person is unique, and the fact that I do not have a psychology degree nor am I a qualified counselor, to be able to come up with an upbeat, encouraging response use up every bit of my immense storage files.
Friday, April 19, 2013
(236) Broken Children, Grown-up Pain by Paul Hegstrom
For my readers who have followed my blog, you would know that I have the privilege to listen to 4 women in pain for the past 19 years.
I primarily saw them as former sufferers of learning disabilities. Which probably was not too far off the mark! Well! In the above book the author proposes the theory that when children went through trauma before the age of 13, they might have what was called arrested development and then they remained as children in certain areas of their lives until their minds are renewed by God.
The first lady I spent a fair amount of time listening to did not want to change her paradigm, she merely wanted to keep looking for new people to pay her sympathetic attention. The second one came to accept her troubling marriage as something she would rather keep than dissolve, she also increasingly prayed about things and issues that bothered her. About that time I moved away from Silver City.
The third one was Zelda. It was marvelous how God was gracious to her. He was restoring to her the locust eaten years of girlhood. I guess she would have to delve deeper why she has an anger problem that seems somewhat disproportionate to the incident that trigger the emotion.
The fourth one was the one whom God miraculously reconciled with her ex-husband. Well! I suppose they would still have issues and hurts to settle for a while more. But there is nothing God could not accomplish if they only allow Him to.
This is a book that every people worker should read. I think in our imperfect world there are many people who are walking around with crippling hurts that dated back from their childhood days.
I primarily saw them as former sufferers of learning disabilities. Which probably was not too far off the mark! Well! In the above book the author proposes the theory that when children went through trauma before the age of 13, they might have what was called arrested development and then they remained as children in certain areas of their lives until their minds are renewed by God.
The first lady I spent a fair amount of time listening to did not want to change her paradigm, she merely wanted to keep looking for new people to pay her sympathetic attention. The second one came to accept her troubling marriage as something she would rather keep than dissolve, she also increasingly prayed about things and issues that bothered her. About that time I moved away from Silver City.
The third one was Zelda. It was marvelous how God was gracious to her. He was restoring to her the locust eaten years of girlhood. I guess she would have to delve deeper why she has an anger problem that seems somewhat disproportionate to the incident that trigger the emotion.
The fourth one was the one whom God miraculously reconciled with her ex-husband. Well! I suppose they would still have issues and hurts to settle for a while more. But there is nothing God could not accomplish if they only allow Him to.
This is a book that every people worker should read. I think in our imperfect world there are many people who are walking around with crippling hurts that dated back from their childhood days.
(234) Vote for a brighter future
Years ago I used to read about Soviet citizens who would make jokes and laughed about themselves and their country while waiting in line for essential goods.
Just now among a group of friends we were having a good laugh at our beautiful land which produced a bunch of folks who would purchase marine vehicles which could not submerge, would lose airplane engines from military camps, and would fly military men on civilian flights. It is really not our proudest moment!
Thank God we can still turn up and vote come the big day!
Just now among a group of friends we were having a good laugh at our beautiful land which produced a bunch of folks who would purchase marine vehicles which could not submerge, would lose airplane engines from military camps, and would fly military men on civilian flights. It is really not our proudest moment!
Thank God we can still turn up and vote come the big day!
(233) A Murder is announced by Agatha Christie
On page 10 of A Murder is Announced, we read "And die on the same day and be buried in the same grave. That would be lovely." Bunch, a happy vicar's wife said this to her husband.
In real life, a fair number of people seem to take their lives for granted. My mother's neighbor, Mrs Kok, used to say that she planned to live in her present house with her husband in old age, as she expected her children to move out one by one. My mother, the realist, chose to point out to her that one day one of the pair would most likely die before the other. Then the prospect of living alone in a big house presented itself to Mrs Kok. She did not relish the idea of being all alone since women usually outlive men if they are about the same age. Since then, she no longer said that she would urge each child to move out.
My cousin lives in a small single story house. A few houses away, an old man lived alone. He seldom talked to anyone and there were few visitors. Since he did sometimes leave his house to be away for a week or two, no one was alarmed that he was not seen for a few days. The complacency lasted four days, when foul smell that came from his house caused neighbors to call him and then later the police. He was found dead seated in front of a TV that was tuned on world news.
In real life, a fair number of people seem to take their lives for granted. My mother's neighbor, Mrs Kok, used to say that she planned to live in her present house with her husband in old age, as she expected her children to move out one by one. My mother, the realist, chose to point out to her that one day one of the pair would most likely die before the other. Then the prospect of living alone in a big house presented itself to Mrs Kok. She did not relish the idea of being all alone since women usually outlive men if they are about the same age. Since then, she no longer said that she would urge each child to move out.
My cousin lives in a small single story house. A few houses away, an old man lived alone. He seldom talked to anyone and there were few visitors. Since he did sometimes leave his house to be away for a week or two, no one was alarmed that he was not seen for a few days. The complacency lasted four days, when foul smell that came from his house caused neighbors to call him and then later the police. He was found dead seated in front of a TV that was tuned on world news.
(232) Things in storage
Moments ago a missionary couple came to collect some visual aid left by another colleague. They are going to stand in for the missionary on leave, running a course in empowering a village community to make their own decisions on literacy work.
The missionary on leave went back to take care of her father with Alzeimer's. I really sympathize with that as I see how my cousin struggles with the care of her mum. This couple who just left said that they are going on furlough in June. The convention is four years in the field, one year home on furlough. If they decide to come back, it would make a lot of sense to find a few tenants to live in their present rented house for the year that they will be away. Otherwise it would mean that they have to find an alternate site to place their household goods in storage for one year.
Next to pastor's kids, missionary kids are the one group of people that grew up with periodic upheavals throughout their childhood. Yet I have met a Swiss couple from Bern and Zurich respectively, and their daughter who married an American. All four of them are missionaries, the senior couple have been in South East Asia for most of their lives. The junior couple so far have served in different parts of Asia.
The missionary on leave went back to take care of her father with Alzeimer's. I really sympathize with that as I see how my cousin struggles with the care of her mum. This couple who just left said that they are going on furlough in June. The convention is four years in the field, one year home on furlough. If they decide to come back, it would make a lot of sense to find a few tenants to live in their present rented house for the year that they will be away. Otherwise it would mean that they have to find an alternate site to place their household goods in storage for one year.
Next to pastor's kids, missionary kids are the one group of people that grew up with periodic upheavals throughout their childhood. Yet I have met a Swiss couple from Bern and Zurich respectively, and their daughter who married an American. All four of them are missionaries, the senior couple have been in South East Asia for most of their lives. The junior couple so far have served in different parts of Asia.
Thursday, April 18, 2013
(231-) Remarry?
I have a friend who reconciled with her estranged husband. They were divorced a few years ago.
The next question is : should they remarry?
Hold your horses there! Let us be calm and reason out the pertinent facts. First of all, the legal part of the marriage costs next to nothing. My brother paid 20 Hong Kong dollars to be registered with his beautiful wife. My husband probably paid a few dollars more for our marriage cert. My poor friend actually paid S$15,000 for the dissolution of her marriage, since it was registered in Singapore. Please note: it is more than easy to be wed but it costs a horrendous amount to be divorced!
My personal opinion is there is no real need for them to sign on the dotted lines again! After all, for all the time apart they have neither had any ties with any opposite sex. They are not Muslim, no one would check for their married papers in hotels. The only people who may be bothered about their status would be their children. As long as juniors do not take their fickle parents as role models, I suppose the latter are not doing anyone any harm living as man and wife.
The next question is : should they remarry?
Hold your horses there! Let us be calm and reason out the pertinent facts. First of all, the legal part of the marriage costs next to nothing. My brother paid 20 Hong Kong dollars to be registered with his beautiful wife. My husband probably paid a few dollars more for our marriage cert. My poor friend actually paid S$15,000 for the dissolution of her marriage, since it was registered in Singapore. Please note: it is more than easy to be wed but it costs a horrendous amount to be divorced!
My personal opinion is there is no real need for them to sign on the dotted lines again! After all, for all the time apart they have neither had any ties with any opposite sex. They are not Muslim, no one would check for their married papers in hotels. The only people who may be bothered about their status would be their children. As long as juniors do not take their fickle parents as role models, I suppose the latter are not doing anyone any harm living as man and wife.
(230) Deputy Minister with a bogus degree
We are having election soon. It has been a long time coming.
My husband was just reading some political web sites online just now. Apparently, we have a deputy minister with a bogus Master's degree from the USA. Co-incidentally, a previous IT CEO in China also possessed a supposed degree from the same university. I guess it is easy to buy a piece of paper saying that such a person graduated from such a university in such a field. But honestly, it does not take too much time and effort to verify if such a university exists or if indeed this person is listed as an alumna.
Come election day, I will rise early and wait in line at my polling station. I will probably attend Saturday afternoon service. As a believing voter, I will trust that our sovereign God will oversee that worthy men are chosen as his Government in this nation.
My husband was just reading some political web sites online just now. Apparently, we have a deputy minister with a bogus Master's degree from the USA. Co-incidentally, a previous IT CEO in China also possessed a supposed degree from the same university. I guess it is easy to buy a piece of paper saying that such a person graduated from such a university in such a field. But honestly, it does not take too much time and effort to verify if such a university exists or if indeed this person is listed as an alumna.
Come election day, I will rise early and wait in line at my polling station. I will probably attend Saturday afternoon service. As a believing voter, I will trust that our sovereign God will oversee that worthy men are chosen as his Government in this nation.
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
(228) The Moving Finger by Agatha Christie
In her story, a woman received a poison pen letter accusing her of having a son with someone other than her husband. She was found dead after a daily nap, with a note saying "I cannot go on ..." That was a fictional account, I am sure.
However, in real life I have come across one parallel case. A friend of mine is married to man with five brothers. One of those brothers has a young son with some congenital defect that could be fatal if not treated. In order to find a suitable bone marrow donor, all the uncles as well as the nucleus family members went for blood tests and tissue typing.
All five brothers were gathered in the home of the affected boy. They proceeded to compare test results. All six men were trained in science. One glance at the blood types, their faces paled. My friend, who is married to one, could not comprehend anything even when she looked at the myriad result; since she was in the arts stream as early as lower secondary school. Being alert and curious, she quietly memorized each individual result and consulted me when she came home.
Being conservative Chinese, the entire incident was swept under the carpet and not mentioned again. It is clear that at least three of the six brothers were conceived from man or men other than the legal father. By now, the long suffering father had died. The mother who has led such a colorful life is rather old and is becoming senile. Little wonder that the old woman would complain that throughout her married life, her husband had beaten her time and again. In the old days, wife beating was somewhat tolerated and not many couples would divorce even if there was spousal abuse. It is interesting that deep secrets such as these could not be submerged for long. I guess this saying explains it somewhat: old sins cast long shadows.
However, in real life I have come across one parallel case. A friend of mine is married to man with five brothers. One of those brothers has a young son with some congenital defect that could be fatal if not treated. In order to find a suitable bone marrow donor, all the uncles as well as the nucleus family members went for blood tests and tissue typing.
All five brothers were gathered in the home of the affected boy. They proceeded to compare test results. All six men were trained in science. One glance at the blood types, their faces paled. My friend, who is married to one, could not comprehend anything even when she looked at the myriad result; since she was in the arts stream as early as lower secondary school. Being alert and curious, she quietly memorized each individual result and consulted me when she came home.
Being conservative Chinese, the entire incident was swept under the carpet and not mentioned again. It is clear that at least three of the six brothers were conceived from man or men other than the legal father. By now, the long suffering father had died. The mother who has led such a colorful life is rather old and is becoming senile. Little wonder that the old woman would complain that throughout her married life, her husband had beaten her time and again. In the old days, wife beating was somewhat tolerated and not many couples would divorce even if there was spousal abuse. It is interesting that deep secrets such as these could not be submerged for long. I guess this saying explains it somewhat: old sins cast long shadows.
(225) They Came to Baghdad by Agatha Christie
This is one of Christie's big picture of the entire world being threatened by a bunch of bad guys story. What I truly enjoyed reading about is Victoria, the impressionable young girl who could "follow" a handsome guy to the other side of the world. After all, there is nothing much in common between London and Baghdad.
Yet, through a series of danger and muddling, she met someone she would probably marry later on should the story has a sequel. What I admire most about her is the fact that she was able to make the best of everything that happened to her. Most importantly, she could learn from her own perceived mistakes. If it was foolhardy to fall in love with a good looking guy who was arrogant and evil, she next chose a slightly older chap who was solid and dependable.
I have a childhood friend who married twice. The first husband was a widower with three boys. Whatever reason she has for choosing him, it was not because he had a lot of time to spend with her. After all, he was a busy specialist doctor. None of her friends know much about why she left him: if it was difficult to be a step mother to three boys? He was nasty to her? She felt badly neglected? A couple of years later, she remarried. This time round it was to a younger guy from another country. He loves her enough to relocate to be with her initially. Even though they remained married for a much longer period, she failed to bear any children. Lately, I heard that he spent more time in his own country than with her. Knowing that he is an only child, I won't be surprised that he started another family in his home country to ensure that he has descendants (traditional Chinese view having heirs as extremely important).
Should there be a third marriage (since my friend is still a most attractive lady although she is in her early forties now), I certainly hope that she will have learnt from her first and second marriages. Let the third man love her, be good to her and will stick to her through thick and thin.
Yet, through a series of danger and muddling, she met someone she would probably marry later on should the story has a sequel. What I admire most about her is the fact that she was able to make the best of everything that happened to her. Most importantly, she could learn from her own perceived mistakes. If it was foolhardy to fall in love with a good looking guy who was arrogant and evil, she next chose a slightly older chap who was solid and dependable.
I have a childhood friend who married twice. The first husband was a widower with three boys. Whatever reason she has for choosing him, it was not because he had a lot of time to spend with her. After all, he was a busy specialist doctor. None of her friends know much about why she left him: if it was difficult to be a step mother to three boys? He was nasty to her? She felt badly neglected? A couple of years later, she remarried. This time round it was to a younger guy from another country. He loves her enough to relocate to be with her initially. Even though they remained married for a much longer period, she failed to bear any children. Lately, I heard that he spent more time in his own country than with her. Knowing that he is an only child, I won't be surprised that he started another family in his home country to ensure that he has descendants (traditional Chinese view having heirs as extremely important).
Should there be a third marriage (since my friend is still a most attractive lady although she is in her early forties now), I certainly hope that she will have learnt from her first and second marriages. Let the third man love her, be good to her and will stick to her through thick and thin.
(224) Age of great mobility
I came back from an inter-denominational prayer gathering. Around the table sat seven individuals. Winnie just came back from a few weeks in Indonesia. She founded a scattering of pre-school classes in the highlands and still raises fund for the literacy project.
Evon visited her social worker friends in China. Mr and Mrs Sebastian just came back from Miri. My husband is going on a trip in two weeks to Chiangmai to look up friends. That left Emily and I who did not go anywhere the last month and we have no trip planned for the next month.
We belong to an age of high mobility. Air tickets are relatively cheap thanks to budget airlines. We talked about the avian flu in China. Yet none of us fear enough to curtail our jetting about. None of us are in business nor do we work for corporations. Most of us are semi-retired or self-employed. No wonder any virulent bug gets passed from passenger to passenger and within days it could spread all over many countries.
Evon visited her social worker friends in China. Mr and Mrs Sebastian just came back from Miri. My husband is going on a trip in two weeks to Chiangmai to look up friends. That left Emily and I who did not go anywhere the last month and we have no trip planned for the next month.
We belong to an age of high mobility. Air tickets are relatively cheap thanks to budget airlines. We talked about the avian flu in China. Yet none of us fear enough to curtail our jetting about. None of us are in business nor do we work for corporations. Most of us are semi-retired or self-employed. No wonder any virulent bug gets passed from passenger to passenger and within days it could spread all over many countries.
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
(220) The Boston explosions
My husband has a good friend living in Boston. As far as I know, he run in quite a few of the Boston Marathons previously. When I heard about one of the three dead was an eight year old boy, my heart did not rest until his name was announced and a photo was flashed. My husband's friend has an only son around that age. It was not that boy as I feared.
The CNN special report on the Boston incident was clear and informative. It is tragic that such a healthy event on a cool spring day was turned into a blood bath. Apart from the three dead, about 25 were seriously injured out of more than 140.
Think about it, nobody would or could imagine such a horrific thing happening. After all, for family members and friends of the participants, it would be natural to gather near the finishing line. Whoever who placed the bombs must hate America enough to want to inflict such terrible wounds (amputations of legs) on folks who merely show love and support to their loved ones! After all, the wounded ranged from age 2 to 71. These are ordinary citizens, they are not VIPs nor are they policy makers. Of all cowardly acts, this is surely one of the lowest of the low!
The CNN special report on the Boston incident was clear and informative. It is tragic that such a healthy event on a cool spring day was turned into a blood bath. Apart from the three dead, about 25 were seriously injured out of more than 140.
Think about it, nobody would or could imagine such a horrific thing happening. After all, for family members and friends of the participants, it would be natural to gather near the finishing line. Whoever who placed the bombs must hate America enough to want to inflict such terrible wounds (amputations of legs) on folks who merely show love and support to their loved ones! After all, the wounded ranged from age 2 to 71. These are ordinary citizens, they are not VIPs nor are they policy makers. Of all cowardly acts, this is surely one of the lowest of the low!
Monday, April 15, 2013
(219) The safest place for my money
Ever since I heard about Cyprus' financial crisis, I have been watching international news whenever I have the chance.
This seems to be the first case of having depositors being penalized for saving when the nation require bailing out. Even though Cyprus is a small nation, depositors of other nations would be affected. I wonder if those who are affected are from Cyprus or are they mainly from Russia as reported? Today I heard from a middle eastern TV news that badly affected depositors are given Cyprus citizenship.
When I mentioned the last bit to my husband, he doubted any foreign depositors would want to live in Cyprus with the current financial climate. Now I see why Asians prefer to convert liquid wealth of a certain strata to real estate. A piece of land or a building could not be taken away by any financial institution as easily. Real estate in prime sites would appreciate over a period of years too.
I have long ago given up my career to bring up my children. Since my husband had a business failure, I have learnt to live a simple life. Whatever little surplus I have, I give away to God's work. In that sense, I don't have to worry about any authority taking away my wealth in any local or foreign bank. God is no man's debtor, the bread I have cast over the water did come back in ways I earlier could not imagine.
This seems to be the first case of having depositors being penalized for saving when the nation require bailing out. Even though Cyprus is a small nation, depositors of other nations would be affected. I wonder if those who are affected are from Cyprus or are they mainly from Russia as reported? Today I heard from a middle eastern TV news that badly affected depositors are given Cyprus citizenship.
When I mentioned the last bit to my husband, he doubted any foreign depositors would want to live in Cyprus with the current financial climate. Now I see why Asians prefer to convert liquid wealth of a certain strata to real estate. A piece of land or a building could not be taken away by any financial institution as easily. Real estate in prime sites would appreciate over a period of years too.
I have long ago given up my career to bring up my children. Since my husband had a business failure, I have learnt to live a simple life. Whatever little surplus I have, I give away to God's work. In that sense, I don't have to worry about any authority taking away my wealth in any local or foreign bank. God is no man's debtor, the bread I have cast over the water did come back in ways I earlier could not imagine.
Saturday, March 23, 2013
(218) Good Food Moments
There are two main groups on earth: those who eat to live and the others who live to eat.
Out of my children, Elizabeth and Michael love to eat. They often count on their fingers what dishes they like from their favorite restaurants. I enjoy good food too, but my memory often zooms in on children and adult's foibles or antics I could not help but observe. They would remind me of food we shared from years past but to be honest, I have forgotten or only vaguely recall with a lot of reminders.
However, there are a few good food moments that I would not forget :-
1. Eating freshly caught prawns in a fishing village near Singapore. My grand ma steamed them and they tasted heavenly. I was six years old, it was the first time my father took me back to his hometown. I have not tasted any better prawns since. For my American readers, prawns are like shrimps but they are slightly different.
2. When I was young, my family was so poor that my brothers and I would only get to eat fish ball noodle only if one of us had fever. I still recall my mum would walk with the healthy children across the main road to buy fifty cents' worth of Teo Chew fish ball noodle soup (rice noodle called kway teo) cooked by a man in a tiny roadside stall. Of course the sick child could hardly swallow much as fever was often caused by sore throat. The rest of us would share and feast over the remainder. As our mother and grandmother would brew Chinese herbal tea often, sicknesses were few and far in between. All the more wonderful when we had a chance to eat the precious noodle.
3. When my husband and I brought the children to the beach, we ate in a small restaurant in Pantai Remis. That was the only time we had a steamed silver pomfret (a delicacy Chinese value in my country) that required no ginger, spring onion nor sesame oil. It was absolutely fresh and sweet.
4. During my last visit, my uncle, auntie and cousin (from China) took us to the famous Sar Hor Fun in Canton. They generously ordered three types of Hor Fun (rice noodle). The best was the noodle in clear soup. I can't quite recall if it was served with meat or fish ball. Neither am I certain if it was pork or beef ball. But what impressed me was the simple soup and the noodle that crunch just the right amount.
So you see, I am a simple eater who enjoy non-sophisticated food.
Out of my children, Elizabeth and Michael love to eat. They often count on their fingers what dishes they like from their favorite restaurants. I enjoy good food too, but my memory often zooms in on children and adult's foibles or antics I could not help but observe. They would remind me of food we shared from years past but to be honest, I have forgotten or only vaguely recall with a lot of reminders.
However, there are a few good food moments that I would not forget :-
1. Eating freshly caught prawns in a fishing village near Singapore. My grand ma steamed them and they tasted heavenly. I was six years old, it was the first time my father took me back to his hometown. I have not tasted any better prawns since. For my American readers, prawns are like shrimps but they are slightly different.
2. When I was young, my family was so poor that my brothers and I would only get to eat fish ball noodle only if one of us had fever. I still recall my mum would walk with the healthy children across the main road to buy fifty cents' worth of Teo Chew fish ball noodle soup (rice noodle called kway teo) cooked by a man in a tiny roadside stall. Of course the sick child could hardly swallow much as fever was often caused by sore throat. The rest of us would share and feast over the remainder. As our mother and grandmother would brew Chinese herbal tea often, sicknesses were few and far in between. All the more wonderful when we had a chance to eat the precious noodle.
3. When my husband and I brought the children to the beach, we ate in a small restaurant in Pantai Remis. That was the only time we had a steamed silver pomfret (a delicacy Chinese value in my country) that required no ginger, spring onion nor sesame oil. It was absolutely fresh and sweet.
4. During my last visit, my uncle, auntie and cousin (from China) took us to the famous Sar Hor Fun in Canton. They generously ordered three types of Hor Fun (rice noodle). The best was the noodle in clear soup. I can't quite recall if it was served with meat or fish ball. Neither am I certain if it was pork or beef ball. But what impressed me was the simple soup and the noodle that crunch just the right amount.
So you see, I am a simple eater who enjoy non-sophisticated food.
(217) Asking for a miracle
Being a believer, I often pray. Most of the time is for good weather when I am on the go and I pray for parking in crowded places. Yes, I pray for finances, places in universities for my children, gainful employment, scholarships and good exam results. Recently I visited my elderly aunt in hospital and prayed for a successful hip replacement surgery, speedy recovery and painlessness. Of course others prayed too, my husband and children, my Wednesday prayer group, my husband's Sunday morning group, my old uncle(my aunt's brother)'s entire family too.
Above all that I expected, she came out of the long operation and she was alert. She healed rapidly, until today she only took one pain killer when my cousin insisted because the patient had to travel to the hospital to take out the stitches. She started standing on both feet within a week of the operation and two nights ago she attempted to walk to the toilet by herself. My poor cousin almost had a fit as she was afraid the old lady would fall. The next day the carer resorted to tying one leg of the patient's to the bed post so as to remind her that she needed help going to the toilet.
I am most amazed and grateful that God answered our prayers. When the patient's daughter challenged me to pray for the former's short term memory lost to be reversed, I balked. After reading lengthy articles on Alzeimer's and dementia, I lack the faith to believe. If I don't believe, there is not much point praying.
However, by chance I attended a Full Gospel Business Men's meeting and heard that one young man received a new brain after being in a coma for six months. Well, I did not ask for a new brain for my aunt, I merely requested for the ability to remember. In return for the speaker's prayer, I promised to take my aunt, who lives an hour away, to the meeting to testify if she recovers her memory. After all, she needs salvation more than a good brain at age eighty four. (The above was blogged on 3/23/13)
On 4/15/13 my aunt's memory has not improved. I take it that the answer from God is no or wait. I, an ordinary mortal, cannot understand why some prayers are answered fast and in a beautiful manner; but other prayer requests are not granted. God is sovereign and his ways are much higher than all I can think or reason. Recently a former church member died in Singapore of cancer in her thirties despite months of corporate and personal prayers. She happened to have rather young children. The only silver lining is that the deceased's last wish of having her parents accept Jesus into their hearts was granted. Both aged parents repeated the sinners' prayer ( in her presence) during her last window of consciousness.
Above all that I expected, she came out of the long operation and she was alert. She healed rapidly, until today she only took one pain killer when my cousin insisted because the patient had to travel to the hospital to take out the stitches. She started standing on both feet within a week of the operation and two nights ago she attempted to walk to the toilet by herself. My poor cousin almost had a fit as she was afraid the old lady would fall. The next day the carer resorted to tying one leg of the patient's to the bed post so as to remind her that she needed help going to the toilet.
I am most amazed and grateful that God answered our prayers. When the patient's daughter challenged me to pray for the former's short term memory lost to be reversed, I balked. After reading lengthy articles on Alzeimer's and dementia, I lack the faith to believe. If I don't believe, there is not much point praying.
However, by chance I attended a Full Gospel Business Men's meeting and heard that one young man received a new brain after being in a coma for six months. Well, I did not ask for a new brain for my aunt, I merely requested for the ability to remember. In return for the speaker's prayer, I promised to take my aunt, who lives an hour away, to the meeting to testify if she recovers her memory. After all, she needs salvation more than a good brain at age eighty four. (The above was blogged on 3/23/13)
On 4/15/13 my aunt's memory has not improved. I take it that the answer from God is no or wait. I, an ordinary mortal, cannot understand why some prayers are answered fast and in a beautiful manner; but other prayer requests are not granted. God is sovereign and his ways are much higher than all I can think or reason. Recently a former church member died in Singapore of cancer in her thirties despite months of corporate and personal prayers. She happened to have rather young children. The only silver lining is that the deceased's last wish of having her parents accept Jesus into their hearts was granted. Both aged parents repeated the sinners' prayer ( in her presence) during her last window of consciousness.
(216) Popularity
I had a chat with my first cousin who works in advertising and is really into psychology. According to her, when we want to relate to the masses, it is really easier to be a little of an underdog so that many people would feel like they would give us helping hands. On the other hand, it is not really wise for a public figure to portray a perfect image.
For example, she asked me if I like Nicole Kidman. Well! I am not really big on super stars. I think she looks more than beautiful in some of her shows. Can't say I am a follower of hers but then again I have nothing against her. My first cousin said that while there are lots of people who adore her yet there is a group of people who dislike her and think she is stuck up. Apart from the media portrayal and the many movies, these people don't have anything else to judge her on. Therefore, it is all a matter of perception. My first cousin has this theory that because Nicole is near perfect, mortals cannot accept perfection. It may not be envy either, some very ordinary women may not even want to trade places with her.
Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Proverbs 31:30
For example, she asked me if I like Nicole Kidman. Well! I am not really big on super stars. I think she looks more than beautiful in some of her shows. Can't say I am a follower of hers but then again I have nothing against her. My first cousin said that while there are lots of people who adore her yet there is a group of people who dislike her and think she is stuck up. Apart from the media portrayal and the many movies, these people don't have anything else to judge her on. Therefore, it is all a matter of perception. My first cousin has this theory that because Nicole is near perfect, mortals cannot accept perfection. It may not be envy either, some very ordinary women may not even want to trade places with her.
Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Proverbs 31:30
Tuesday, March 5, 2013
(215) Second Glance by Jodi Picoult
It is interesting that when a ghost hunter met a ghost, he thought it was a living person. Perhaps it is because I am from the East, I know that there are things between heaven and hell that human could not find explanations for.
Personally I have not seen any apparitions. But my grand ma and eldest aunt both could and did see spirits. During the Japanese occupation, they ventured into deep jungle to find edible leaves and roots. My eldest aunt saw a native mother and two children clearly while my grand ma saw them as shadows. My grand ma cautioned my eldest aunt not to say anything as the two parties passed each other on the narrow trail.
When my children were young, I had a helper. A few years before, she actually saw a woman combing her hair in a hotel room when my helper barged into it to retrieved some item. Interestingly, the woman looked normal, both human and spirit ignored each other.
When my youngest was about five, she saw people walking home in the moonlight. I turned and had a good look and saw nothing at the first floor window. Taking the counsel from my grand ma and my helper, my daughter and I went back to sleep while whomever she had a glimpse of went back to wherever they came from.
Personally I have not seen any apparitions. But my grand ma and eldest aunt both could and did see spirits. During the Japanese occupation, they ventured into deep jungle to find edible leaves and roots. My eldest aunt saw a native mother and two children clearly while my grand ma saw them as shadows. My grand ma cautioned my eldest aunt not to say anything as the two parties passed each other on the narrow trail.
When my children were young, I had a helper. A few years before, she actually saw a woman combing her hair in a hotel room when my helper barged into it to retrieved some item. Interestingly, the woman looked normal, both human and spirit ignored each other.
When my youngest was about five, she saw people walking home in the moonlight. I turned and had a good look and saw nothing at the first floor window. Taking the counsel from my grand ma and my helper, my daughter and I went back to sleep while whomever she had a glimpse of went back to wherever they came from.
(214) Salem Falls by Jodi Picoult
The name Salem brought two images to me: cigarettes and the witch hunt. Picoult wove a story that brought a handsome, well educated man from a rich background to a rape victim who not only kept her rapist's child but loved and mourned her for years after the child died of an illness. While the victim suffered in silence, the man was openly accused of rape of a minor and was imprisoned as a result of a plea.
Both the man and the woman were innocent who suffered grievously. I felt very angry with Jack, the history teacher who doubled as soccer coach, who did not have a care about what others thought about him. He was a fool for getting his class of teenage girls to put on their swim suits and then draped table cloths over themselves for mock war fare. He was a moron for picking up his student's bra and kept it on his person. That just about sealed his fate of being charged as a child rapist.
When I was residing in Silver City, there was a woman who waited for words from her daughter who disappeared during her first year as a university student in Australia. The mother kept her old house and her old house phone for years until the death of her husband. Then she sold her house to a relative who promised to keep the old house number and would pass the message if her daughter called. Twenty one years to the date her daughter was missing, a call did come. Two months later, her long lost daughter came back with a twenty year old son. Apparently, she was raped on a date. As a Roman Catholic, she refused abortion and accepted state aid. She changed her name legally to protect herself and her son. Overnight she relocated to another state with the help of a social worker. Happily for the mother, her long wait was over.
Both the man and the woman were innocent who suffered grievously. I felt very angry with Jack, the history teacher who doubled as soccer coach, who did not have a care about what others thought about him. He was a fool for getting his class of teenage girls to put on their swim suits and then draped table cloths over themselves for mock war fare. He was a moron for picking up his student's bra and kept it on his person. That just about sealed his fate of being charged as a child rapist.
When I was residing in Silver City, there was a woman who waited for words from her daughter who disappeared during her first year as a university student in Australia. The mother kept her old house and her old house phone for years until the death of her husband. Then she sold her house to a relative who promised to keep the old house number and would pass the message if her daughter called. Twenty one years to the date her daughter was missing, a call did come. Two months later, her long lost daughter came back with a twenty year old son. Apparently, she was raped on a date. As a Roman Catholic, she refused abortion and accepted state aid. She changed her name legally to protect herself and her son. Overnight she relocated to another state with the help of a social worker. Happily for the mother, her long wait was over.
Friday, February 22, 2013
(213) Three days two nights in Sandakan
My husband paid a nominal amount during a charity fund raiser and obtained a coupon for two nights' stay in a fairly new hotel in Sandakan.
I was disappointed as I was hoping for somewhere in London, Melbourne, Chiangmai, or Hong Kong. After offering to let one of my children to travel with daddy, each one refused to go. Reasons are varied: no friends there, nothing much to see or do there, it is a gruffy old town ... In the end when we found economical air tickets by Air Asia, I decided to come myself.
The only place I have been to in Borneo is Sibu, Sarawak before coming to Sandakan. To be brutally frank, I was not impressed at all with Sibu. But my missionary friends are right, Sandakan is much more attractive than Sibu. I like the coastal scenery. For being the second largest city in Sabah, it has a laid back charm like Ipoh.
My husband and I enjoyed the only Korean eatery: Seoul Palace(I think). He had beef and I ordered an omelet. We went to have western lunch near the Alice Keith house. Scones were on promotion. The beef stew offered was delicious! The best place we ate in was the Sea King: we had a steam red snapper Cantonese style (Sandakan is also called Little Hong Kong), beef cooked with black beans (highly recommended), fried kalamari ring(squid) and a simple garlic fried vegetable.
Neither my husband nor I are big on wild life, we spent virtually all our meals chatting with our friends. It actually turned out to be a trip to renew friendship.
I was disappointed as I was hoping for somewhere in London, Melbourne, Chiangmai, or Hong Kong. After offering to let one of my children to travel with daddy, each one refused to go. Reasons are varied: no friends there, nothing much to see or do there, it is a gruffy old town ... In the end when we found economical air tickets by Air Asia, I decided to come myself.
The only place I have been to in Borneo is Sibu, Sarawak before coming to Sandakan. To be brutally frank, I was not impressed at all with Sibu. But my missionary friends are right, Sandakan is much more attractive than Sibu. I like the coastal scenery. For being the second largest city in Sabah, it has a laid back charm like Ipoh.
My husband and I enjoyed the only Korean eatery: Seoul Palace(I think). He had beef and I ordered an omelet. We went to have western lunch near the Alice Keith house. Scones were on promotion. The beef stew offered was delicious! The best place we ate in was the Sea King: we had a steam red snapper Cantonese style (Sandakan is also called Little Hong Kong), beef cooked with black beans (highly recommended), fried kalamari ring(squid) and a simple garlic fried vegetable.
Neither my husband nor I are big on wild life, we spent virtually all our meals chatting with our friends. It actually turned out to be a trip to renew friendship.
Thursday, February 21, 2013
(212) New Top Ten
134 Upbringing
168 A change of Heart by Jeffrey Archer
89 Never Stop on the Motorway by Jeffrey Archer
664 Nightshade by Nora Roberts
575 Hide and Seek by James Patterson
91 Shoeshine Boy by Jeffrey Archer
647 The Return of Rafe MacKade by Nora Roberts
686 Night Smoke by Nora Roberts
653 The Pride of Jared MacKade by Nora Roberts
981 In a Free State by V.S.Naipaul
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(211) Sanctuary
We met a couple from Tawau who are building their vacation home in the interior of Sabah that is about four hours' drive from the nearest petrol station. They are planting fruit trees for a start. Now they have a cabin that boasts of a large living area and a small bed room. In stages, they plan to add a kitchen, an indoor toilet and a wash room. Ultimately they want to have a self-sustaining farm to move to in a few years' time. They have a stream in their property so there is no real need to dig a well. For electricity they are thinking of solar panels and a small generator to supply a few energy efficient tubes.
This couple reminds us of another we met in Tanjung Malim. The latter bought a link house with some government idle land behind their house bordering a forest reserve. The part-time mechanic cum hospital assistant who was a pastor in his earlier years planted fruit trees, vegetables and root vegetables on the open land. He shares his harvests with his neighbors gladly and therefore no one has a motive to complain about his using the public land.
The idea of being self-sufficient is fairly attractive to me, born and bred in the city. But I suppose it would require a fair bit of effort to learn to plant crops, even for our own consumption. One has to be convinced enough to devote financial resources towards purchasing or leasing some land to create a sanctuary.
This couple reminds us of another we met in Tanjung Malim. The latter bought a link house with some government idle land behind their house bordering a forest reserve. The part-time mechanic cum hospital assistant who was a pastor in his earlier years planted fruit trees, vegetables and root vegetables on the open land. He shares his harvests with his neighbors gladly and therefore no one has a motive to complain about his using the public land.
The idea of being self-sufficient is fairly attractive to me, born and bred in the city. But I suppose it would require a fair bit of effort to learn to plant crops, even for our own consumption. One has to be convinced enough to devote financial resources towards purchasing or leasing some land to create a sanctuary.
(210) A Change of Hearts
I am extremely surprised to see (168) A Change of Heart (written on 12/1/2013) garnered 60 viewing and rose to the second highest ranking within a little more than a month.
When my brother won a scholarship to a college in New York state, my father told him not to return but to gain resident status. He did stay on long enough to earn a Masters degree. After that he went to work in China and Hong Kong. When my turn came, I was given a sound telling to for choosing to return to a country that father said bode a dim future for me. Of course he was glad that I was around to care for him whenever he was sick. Now that he is no longer around to see what financial strait USA has been reduced to, I realize I am correct to listen to an all knowing God rather than to decide based on the then current circumstances.
Looking at my generation of Chinese men and women, generally we have done well despite reverse discrimination in broad educational policies. Those who are good in academics managed to gain entrance into Singapore, USA, Australia, New Zealand ... Even those who are not wealthy managed to win scholarships and financial aid to study abroad. A handful who are not academically inclined managed to start businesses and made good. It could be a hawker stall, small restaurants, machinist factory, packaging contractor, computer retail, hand phone booths in shopping centers, stalls selling crystal jewelry, service center offering cleaning service ...
Although it is not easy to live under discrimination, I personally think that my brothers and I work three times as hard as those who are favored. In the short term, it was frustrating. However, we were forced to strive harder and aim for excellence. My eldest brother sat for our O-level national language paper quite a few times to get a good grade. I was lucky that I managed to qualify for a Credit at first try. For my generation, my siblings and I all possess at least one foreign degree.
For the next generation, Victor is working now with two foreign degrees. Mandy is finishing her local private college degree. Kenneth and Elizabeth are both working towards local public university degrees. Whatever government policies are, those who have the will shall find a way. The rest of the children are still young or have opted for other avenues.
There is, however, one snag that exists: for those who were side-lined whom later chose Christianity, a few received clear callings to relocate to neighboring countries. The people group they have to work with look like the main race in our country, have similar religion and language roots. One missionary from my home town struggled for years to love the tribe he has dedicated his life to win. It was not until he realized the bitterness he held toward these people because of our governmental decisions that he had the breakthrough he had worked years to gain. I am fortunate that even though I did not receive any local uni offer, I could choose between an US and a Singaporean offer. But interestingly, I was not called to work with any regional tribes. I am called to work with the learning disabled, at first children and later adults. With the advent of the world wide web, I could literally reach all countries, every race regardless of time zone and geographical differences. For years I have functioned in English, but now I am required to speak in Mandarin and Cantonese to reach my targets.
When my brother won a scholarship to a college in New York state, my father told him not to return but to gain resident status. He did stay on long enough to earn a Masters degree. After that he went to work in China and Hong Kong. When my turn came, I was given a sound telling to for choosing to return to a country that father said bode a dim future for me. Of course he was glad that I was around to care for him whenever he was sick. Now that he is no longer around to see what financial strait USA has been reduced to, I realize I am correct to listen to an all knowing God rather than to decide based on the then current circumstances.
Looking at my generation of Chinese men and women, generally we have done well despite reverse discrimination in broad educational policies. Those who are good in academics managed to gain entrance into Singapore, USA, Australia, New Zealand ... Even those who are not wealthy managed to win scholarships and financial aid to study abroad. A handful who are not academically inclined managed to start businesses and made good. It could be a hawker stall, small restaurants, machinist factory, packaging contractor, computer retail, hand phone booths in shopping centers, stalls selling crystal jewelry, service center offering cleaning service ...
Although it is not easy to live under discrimination, I personally think that my brothers and I work three times as hard as those who are favored. In the short term, it was frustrating. However, we were forced to strive harder and aim for excellence. My eldest brother sat for our O-level national language paper quite a few times to get a good grade. I was lucky that I managed to qualify for a Credit at first try. For my generation, my siblings and I all possess at least one foreign degree.
For the next generation, Victor is working now with two foreign degrees. Mandy is finishing her local private college degree. Kenneth and Elizabeth are both working towards local public university degrees. Whatever government policies are, those who have the will shall find a way. The rest of the children are still young or have opted for other avenues.
There is, however, one snag that exists: for those who were side-lined whom later chose Christianity, a few received clear callings to relocate to neighboring countries. The people group they have to work with look like the main race in our country, have similar religion and language roots. One missionary from my home town struggled for years to love the tribe he has dedicated his life to win. It was not until he realized the bitterness he held toward these people because of our governmental decisions that he had the breakthrough he had worked years to gain. I am fortunate that even though I did not receive any local uni offer, I could choose between an US and a Singaporean offer. But interestingly, I was not called to work with any regional tribes. I am called to work with the learning disabled, at first children and later adults. With the advent of the world wide web, I could literally reach all countries, every race regardless of time zone and geographical differences. For years I have functioned in English, but now I am required to speak in Mandarin and Cantonese to reach my targets.
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
(207) Crisis with aged relative
I went to a place south of here to visit my eldest aunt. She fell a few times the day before and was hospitalized yesterday. My two cousins took their mum to the public hospital at 8 am. Finally, at 2:30 pm we managed to visit her, two visitors at a time, in the ward after she was settled in. We were given special concession to visit during non-visiting hours for we came from out of town.
My cousin May took my mum up first. After my mum came down, May took me up. In the intervening 5 minutes, my aunt had forgotten that my mum visited. She was surprised to see me and asked why I came alone and not bring anyone with me as it was a long drive. I suppose at that moment reality struck, her short term memory loss was so pronounced that I could expect that she would not recognize who I am some time in the foreseeable future. But she has known me for as many years as I have lived. I remember my deceased grand ma said that this aunt came to help care for me as a new born and cook for my mum while my grand ma was looking after my two other siblings and cook for the rest of the extended family. You see, special food full of ginger, wine and vinegar is usually cooked for the lactating mother. We were quite poor then that the best food was given to the new mum.
May was her usual bustling, efficient self, after all she was formerly a school principal. She tended to everything that needed to be done as she was required to spend every night in the hospital caring for her mum. There is a severe shortage of trained nurses for public hospitals as many went to earn the high salaries in the middle eastern countries. My cousin Leon was very subdued and he was near tears when my mum and I asked about the details of the several falls. Meanwhile, my husband and son was waiting in another area with my God sister.
According to the x-rays taken, the fracture was located at the top of the femur which is actually in the hip joint. An operation seemed indicated. On the other hand, my aunt is 85 years old. While she has hypertension, her overall health is good. Her blood sugar is perfectly normal and she has a BMI to be envied. Well, we can only pray that she will heal with traction and bed rest. Should she be operated on and not survive, that she would go painlessly.
My cousin May took my mum up first. After my mum came down, May took me up. In the intervening 5 minutes, my aunt had forgotten that my mum visited. She was surprised to see me and asked why I came alone and not bring anyone with me as it was a long drive. I suppose at that moment reality struck, her short term memory loss was so pronounced that I could expect that she would not recognize who I am some time in the foreseeable future. But she has known me for as many years as I have lived. I remember my deceased grand ma said that this aunt came to help care for me as a new born and cook for my mum while my grand ma was looking after my two other siblings and cook for the rest of the extended family. You see, special food full of ginger, wine and vinegar is usually cooked for the lactating mother. We were quite poor then that the best food was given to the new mum.
May was her usual bustling, efficient self, after all she was formerly a school principal. She tended to everything that needed to be done as she was required to spend every night in the hospital caring for her mum. There is a severe shortage of trained nurses for public hospitals as many went to earn the high salaries in the middle eastern countries. My cousin Leon was very subdued and he was near tears when my mum and I asked about the details of the several falls. Meanwhile, my husband and son was waiting in another area with my God sister.
According to the x-rays taken, the fracture was located at the top of the femur which is actually in the hip joint. An operation seemed indicated. On the other hand, my aunt is 85 years old. While she has hypertension, her overall health is good. Her blood sugar is perfectly normal and she has a BMI to be envied. Well, we can only pray that she will heal with traction and bed rest. Should she be operated on and not survive, that she would go painlessly.
Monday, February 11, 2013
(201) Perfect Match by Jodi Picoult
In Perfect Match, Nina Frost (Assistant District Attorney) lost it when her own son was raped by a priest. Instead of putting faith in the faulty legal system, she shot the child abuser dead in court.
My daughter read this book some time ago but she remembered this plot and said that it was one of the best she came across. I was born with a slant with words and grew up with adults telling me that I should become a lawyer to use my gift. Some how I did not but quite a few of my closest friends are in the legal profession.
Perhaps I was rather sheltered, I honestly can claim that I did not personally know of any child abuse victims in my country. Well, in the East, such things are buried and everyone concerned considered it best forgotten. And so, my readers probably wondered why I choose to elaborate on response to such a book.
A short recap: I suffered emotionally from some form of learning disability as a child. At 21, I witnessed first hand how angry a full blown dyslexic child was when taunted by peers that he could not read. The trip I made to a self diagnosis became a life long passion. I worked with my own children. Then I took in other people's children to help them to over come obstacles in learning. Ultimately I become a listener to women who might have overcome all the learning obstacles but whose lives were plagued by unresolved anger, frustration, irrational fears and whatever emotional scars caused by the desperate fight many years ago.
Recently I heard of two children in my church. A teenage boy who aimed high to become a medical doctor found that he was not made for studying the sciences at age 16. In fact no matter how hard he worked, his grades fell. Until now I hesitate to get involved. Both the mother (who is kind of a friend) and the teenager are Chinese educated. Even if I reveal my blog name and ask them to read the relevant blog, they are not going to understand enough to help the situation.
The other child is seven years old. His parents sent him to a Chinese primary school. He is already displaying the classic symptoms of not being able to cope in class. In fact his back ground is rather interesting. His mother possesses two degrees and is an educator in a local college. His father, I don't know his educational back ground, works in a restaurant selling a local delicacy. Since both sets of grand parents have money, the boy will turn out ok in the end. But even as I think about their decision to put him in a Chinese school, I get angry. He may end up with much baggage and lots of emotional scarring. I somehow survived with my perfect recall (long ago I probably functioned as a photostat machine, which explained why I excelled in Chinese which is made up of unique ideograms), and now I can still pick up knowledge easily as I can elect to turn on an in built tape recorder. But funnily enough, I live in a house full of English books but you would be hard pressed to find a single Chinese book. No, I don't hate the Chinese language. On the contrary, I do love Chinese literature and Chinese poems. At some point, I should rewrite my entire set of blogs in Chinese. But I delay and I drag my feet. I suppose it is all a matter of time. My next person to listen to is talking to me in Cantonese now. In a few years' time I would have acquired all the working vocabulary in Cantonese to explain about the learning process and the emotional journey she struggled through. By then, it would be easier to type in Chinese characters without bothering with Han Yu Pin Yin.
My daughter read this book some time ago but she remembered this plot and said that it was one of the best she came across. I was born with a slant with words and grew up with adults telling me that I should become a lawyer to use my gift. Some how I did not but quite a few of my closest friends are in the legal profession.
Perhaps I was rather sheltered, I honestly can claim that I did not personally know of any child abuse victims in my country. Well, in the East, such things are buried and everyone concerned considered it best forgotten. And so, my readers probably wondered why I choose to elaborate on response to such a book.
A short recap: I suffered emotionally from some form of learning disability as a child. At 21, I witnessed first hand how angry a full blown dyslexic child was when taunted by peers that he could not read. The trip I made to a self diagnosis became a life long passion. I worked with my own children. Then I took in other people's children to help them to over come obstacles in learning. Ultimately I become a listener to women who might have overcome all the learning obstacles but whose lives were plagued by unresolved anger, frustration, irrational fears and whatever emotional scars caused by the desperate fight many years ago.
Recently I heard of two children in my church. A teenage boy who aimed high to become a medical doctor found that he was not made for studying the sciences at age 16. In fact no matter how hard he worked, his grades fell. Until now I hesitate to get involved. Both the mother (who is kind of a friend) and the teenager are Chinese educated. Even if I reveal my blog name and ask them to read the relevant blog, they are not going to understand enough to help the situation.
The other child is seven years old. His parents sent him to a Chinese primary school. He is already displaying the classic symptoms of not being able to cope in class. In fact his back ground is rather interesting. His mother possesses two degrees and is an educator in a local college. His father, I don't know his educational back ground, works in a restaurant selling a local delicacy. Since both sets of grand parents have money, the boy will turn out ok in the end. But even as I think about their decision to put him in a Chinese school, I get angry. He may end up with much baggage and lots of emotional scarring. I somehow survived with my perfect recall (long ago I probably functioned as a photostat machine, which explained why I excelled in Chinese which is made up of unique ideograms), and now I can still pick up knowledge easily as I can elect to turn on an in built tape recorder. But funnily enough, I live in a house full of English books but you would be hard pressed to find a single Chinese book. No, I don't hate the Chinese language. On the contrary, I do love Chinese literature and Chinese poems. At some point, I should rewrite my entire set of blogs in Chinese. But I delay and I drag my feet. I suppose it is all a matter of time. My next person to listen to is talking to me in Cantonese now. In a few years' time I would have acquired all the working vocabulary in Cantonese to explain about the learning process and the emotional journey she struggled through. By then, it would be easier to type in Chinese characters without bothering with Han Yu Pin Yin.
(200) The Pact by Jodi Picoult
I find that I not only need to think deeply when I read a Picoult book, I also learn interesting facts. Two apparently happy and well adjusted teenagers were found with one shot in the head and the other fell down with a head wound. It is every parent's nightmare!
Emily, the dead girl, was her mother's pride and joy. Her mother loved her very, very much. To that, no one would dispute. But, look a little closer, did the woman love Emily as a person or as a successful image that brought her pride?
I met some one lately who was a little like Emily's mom, Melanie. This woman brought her son, Byron, to work in a non-profit book room because Byron, who was quite a scholar academically, refused to go to college and he refused to go to work. The reason for being a recluse was he could not take criticism. Since everyone who takes a hefty pay cut to work in the religious center would likely to be kind, we all hope that Byron would find the book room a safe refuge. One thing everyone observed is that Byron would not utter a single word in the presence of his mother. Did she speak on his behalf all the time? Did she make fun of his opinion? Yet when his mother stays away, he is not exactly chatty but he would talk. Did his family insist on him taking up a profession that he absolutely fears? It was obvious they have the necessary money. And Byron would qualify, with his excellent grades.
In The Pact, the last picture painted by Emily was evaluated by an expert. The skull found in her self portrait indicated possible preoccupation with death. The way that black and red were juxtaposed in the background was a documented hint about suicide. The painting of clouds and rain are drawn by people who are depressed and/or suicidal. The eyes are symbolic of a person's thoughts. In Emily's self portrait, she painted gathering downpour in the empty eye sockets. The long developed eye lashes and a highly realistic tongue sent off warning signals about sexual abuse. Apparently, victims of sexual abuse fixate on tongues, eye lashes, wedge shaped objects and belts. When someone paints a floating image, the person doesn't have a feeling of control in his or her life.
Although The Pact is probably a fictional story, it is a story that I can learn from. As parents, we should not insist on the future that we visualize on our reluctant children. Emily was bright, pretty, talented and probably had a winning personality. But she could not reconcile between an unexpected pregnancy with college, she could not face an early marriage while she dealt with the feeling of being unworthy and being dirty/tainted with an act of sex abuse years ago that she hid. She could not see how she could live the ten years between her present self and the future of being a painter. And so she planned and pressurized her beloved to kill her since she could not kill herself on her own.
Emily, the dead girl, was her mother's pride and joy. Her mother loved her very, very much. To that, no one would dispute. But, look a little closer, did the woman love Emily as a person or as a successful image that brought her pride?
I met some one lately who was a little like Emily's mom, Melanie. This woman brought her son, Byron, to work in a non-profit book room because Byron, who was quite a scholar academically, refused to go to college and he refused to go to work. The reason for being a recluse was he could not take criticism. Since everyone who takes a hefty pay cut to work in the religious center would likely to be kind, we all hope that Byron would find the book room a safe refuge. One thing everyone observed is that Byron would not utter a single word in the presence of his mother. Did she speak on his behalf all the time? Did she make fun of his opinion? Yet when his mother stays away, he is not exactly chatty but he would talk. Did his family insist on him taking up a profession that he absolutely fears? It was obvious they have the necessary money. And Byron would qualify, with his excellent grades.
In The Pact, the last picture painted by Emily was evaluated by an expert. The skull found in her self portrait indicated possible preoccupation with death. The way that black and red were juxtaposed in the background was a documented hint about suicide. The painting of clouds and rain are drawn by people who are depressed and/or suicidal. The eyes are symbolic of a person's thoughts. In Emily's self portrait, she painted gathering downpour in the empty eye sockets. The long developed eye lashes and a highly realistic tongue sent off warning signals about sexual abuse. Apparently, victims of sexual abuse fixate on tongues, eye lashes, wedge shaped objects and belts. When someone paints a floating image, the person doesn't have a feeling of control in his or her life.
Although The Pact is probably a fictional story, it is a story that I can learn from. As parents, we should not insist on the future that we visualize on our reluctant children. Emily was bright, pretty, talented and probably had a winning personality. But she could not reconcile between an unexpected pregnancy with college, she could not face an early marriage while she dealt with the feeling of being unworthy and being dirty/tainted with an act of sex abuse years ago that she hid. She could not see how she could live the ten years between her present self and the future of being a painter. And so she planned and pressurized her beloved to kill her since she could not kill herself on her own.
(199) Vanishing Acts by Jodi Picoult
This week belongs to Picoult books. I have been reading quite a few of them: Vanishing Acts, The Pact, Perfect Match and Salem Falls. Each of these involved sexual abuse or assault of minors. Each book is different.
In Vanishing Acts she dealt with multiple issues: kidnapping, stealing identities, alcoholism, and child abuse as well as neglect. While reading this, I think of a Klang mother who lost her son on his first day of school. It was unthinkable for her son to be claimed by a woman with dark glasses in plain sight of a teacher on duty in the waiting area after school. Until today, the boy was not found. A few years ago, a reporter interviewed the family on the boy's birthday and found the family keeping a place for the missing child at the dinner table. Actually, a relative who visited Southern Thailand claimed he saw the boy begging by the way side, but by the time the parents rushed there he was nowhere to be seen. It is not unusual for such a child to be maimed and used for earning money by crooks.
A few weeks ago, a boy called William walked out of his family car one evening and vanished. A huge man hunt was mounted, much money was offered for clues to recovering him. Sad to say, his body was found about a week later in the river. Many people commented on face book, much of it was sympathetic and some filled with anger. The shocking part was the bereaved mom chose to read those messages and was so upset that she made a public apology to the Chinese media. It was perhaps a not very wise decision to leave three children locked in a car while both parents went to see washing machines in an electrical appliance shop. The story went into a twist when the autopsy found some old wounds in the skull and some smart reporters unearthed a report of physical abuse by the father a few months back. A further high point was having clips of the grandmother turning up at the cremation wailing as she had not met up with William, whom she brought up, for a long six months.
I suppose no mothers who love their children deserve to lose them, whether in not taking leave to be in the sending and the picking up of the child on his first day of school; or in desiring to be alone with her husband to find the dream washing machine! But I firmly agree with Delia (the central character in Vanishing Acts) that if her birth mother chose to be blind to the sexual abuse carried out by her boy friend and later second husband, then she deserved to be alone and could not expect visitations from her only living daughter and little grand daughter.
In Vanishing Acts she dealt with multiple issues: kidnapping, stealing identities, alcoholism, and child abuse as well as neglect. While reading this, I think of a Klang mother who lost her son on his first day of school. It was unthinkable for her son to be claimed by a woman with dark glasses in plain sight of a teacher on duty in the waiting area after school. Until today, the boy was not found. A few years ago, a reporter interviewed the family on the boy's birthday and found the family keeping a place for the missing child at the dinner table. Actually, a relative who visited Southern Thailand claimed he saw the boy begging by the way side, but by the time the parents rushed there he was nowhere to be seen. It is not unusual for such a child to be maimed and used for earning money by crooks.
A few weeks ago, a boy called William walked out of his family car one evening and vanished. A huge man hunt was mounted, much money was offered for clues to recovering him. Sad to say, his body was found about a week later in the river. Many people commented on face book, much of it was sympathetic and some filled with anger. The shocking part was the bereaved mom chose to read those messages and was so upset that she made a public apology to the Chinese media. It was perhaps a not very wise decision to leave three children locked in a car while both parents went to see washing machines in an electrical appliance shop. The story went into a twist when the autopsy found some old wounds in the skull and some smart reporters unearthed a report of physical abuse by the father a few months back. A further high point was having clips of the grandmother turning up at the cremation wailing as she had not met up with William, whom she brought up, for a long six months.
I suppose no mothers who love their children deserve to lose them, whether in not taking leave to be in the sending and the picking up of the child on his first day of school; or in desiring to be alone with her husband to find the dream washing machine! But I firmly agree with Delia (the central character in Vanishing Acts) that if her birth mother chose to be blind to the sexual abuse carried out by her boy friend and later second husband, then she deserved to be alone and could not expect visitations from her only living daughter and little grand daughter.
Thursday, January 24, 2013
(198) Pirate Latitudes by Michael Crichton
From history, I know of Spain warring with England for colonies. But it is with this book I learn of the difference between pirating and privateering.
Crichton writes interesting books based on scientific theories. I well remember how impressed I was with The Andromeda Strain. This is the first of his that I read that is historical. A lot of research and imagination must have been through to result in such a piece of work. Somehow I felt a little disappointed with Pirate Latitudes.
Crichton writes interesting books based on scientific theories. I well remember how impressed I was with The Andromeda Strain. This is the first of his that I read that is historical. A lot of research and imagination must have been through to result in such a piece of work. Somehow I felt a little disappointed with Pirate Latitudes.
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
(197) Pavilion of Women by Pearl S. Buck
According to The New Yorker, this is the first novel Buck concerned herself with Chinese of wealth.
I am glad that I did not read it when I was younger. I suppose even ten years ago I might not have understood what she was trying to convey. It is ironic that the priest Andre was considered a heretic by his church in Italy. Yet he housed, brought food and love to orphan girls and he fed and cared for those who could not help themselves. With that good work, no religion and culture would condemn. Compared to him, the traditional missionary Little Sister Hsia was insignificant. It is not that I want to belittle one who left behind her loved ones, country and everything to proclaim the gospel. She gave her entire life up for the love of her God and she was sincere in heart. One preached with words while the other with deeds. Of course deeds outshone words alone!
What Buck portrayed was pre-communist China. I am sure little remain in the China of today. After decades of shared poverty, the gap between the have and the have-not in China widened again. Not being much read in history, I can't tell whether the gap today or seventy years ago was wider. I only know that my ancestors escaped to South East Asia to find a living. Around that time hundreds of thousands left China for many parts of the world. On my father side, his clan spent years clearing virgin jungle to plant rubber trees. On my mother side, my grand parents tapped rubber trees as daily waged labourers. Now, I hear of Chinese nationals robbing restaurants at knife points in the cities. We see China dolls in the big cities as well as tiny towns. I have known a few families and marriages being broken by the wealth seeking Chinese females. At the other extreme, I also have close friends who work in companies and factories owned by Chinese nationals.
I am glad that I did not read it when I was younger. I suppose even ten years ago I might not have understood what she was trying to convey. It is ironic that the priest Andre was considered a heretic by his church in Italy. Yet he housed, brought food and love to orphan girls and he fed and cared for those who could not help themselves. With that good work, no religion and culture would condemn. Compared to him, the traditional missionary Little Sister Hsia was insignificant. It is not that I want to belittle one who left behind her loved ones, country and everything to proclaim the gospel. She gave her entire life up for the love of her God and she was sincere in heart. One preached with words while the other with deeds. Of course deeds outshone words alone!
What Buck portrayed was pre-communist China. I am sure little remain in the China of today. After decades of shared poverty, the gap between the have and the have-not in China widened again. Not being much read in history, I can't tell whether the gap today or seventy years ago was wider. I only know that my ancestors escaped to South East Asia to find a living. Around that time hundreds of thousands left China for many parts of the world. On my father side, his clan spent years clearing virgin jungle to plant rubber trees. On my mother side, my grand parents tapped rubber trees as daily waged labourers. Now, I hear of Chinese nationals robbing restaurants at knife points in the cities. We see China dolls in the big cities as well as tiny towns. I have known a few families and marriages being broken by the wealth seeking Chinese females. At the other extreme, I also have close friends who work in companies and factories owned by Chinese nationals.
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
(196) Book of Souls by Glenn Cooper
This is a sequel to Library of the Dead. In the second book we see more about how one book of records written by the mysterious monks was passed from one hand to another through the generations.
It was smart of Cooper to link a son of the owner of the book to John Calvin the reformist. Then a plague brought the same son to Nostradamus who wrote the books of predictions. Later another descendant even brought in the young William Shakespeare who was supposed to write a sonnet as a clue to help find hidden letters.
As I read of how the young agent Nancy fell for her partner, Will, even though he was old enough to be her father. Will has been through two marriages and numerous girl friends. Well, Nancy didn't mind and neither did her parents. In contrast to that, my neighbour who is a young fifty year old divorcee was not an acceptable choice as a wife to her boy friend. They have been together more than six years but his mother could not accept her because she has married before. I think of her boy friend who is 48 as a man without back bone. If he loses her, it would have been his own fault. It is futile to fight for equal rights for women because in things like marriage and remarriage, men are often more equal than women.
It was smart of Cooper to link a son of the owner of the book to John Calvin the reformist. Then a plague brought the same son to Nostradamus who wrote the books of predictions. Later another descendant even brought in the young William Shakespeare who was supposed to write a sonnet as a clue to help find hidden letters.
As I read of how the young agent Nancy fell for her partner, Will, even though he was old enough to be her father. Will has been through two marriages and numerous girl friends. Well, Nancy didn't mind and neither did her parents. In contrast to that, my neighbour who is a young fifty year old divorcee was not an acceptable choice as a wife to her boy friend. They have been together more than six years but his mother could not accept her because she has married before. I think of her boy friend who is 48 as a man without back bone. If he loses her, it would have been his own fault. It is futile to fight for equal rights for women because in things like marriage and remarriage, men are often more equal than women.
Monday, January 14, 2013
(195) Library of the Dead by Glenn Cooper
I enjoyed reading this book as I did Da Vinci Code, knowing that it is a work of fiction. My son Kenneth said that he would not pay for this book. In any case we borrowed it from his cousin, therefore it did not cost us a cent to obtain it.
From my fairy tales days as a mum borrowing books for my young children, I have come across the superstition of a seventh son of a seventh son being a wizard. Well! I haven't some across one, have you? With very small families in our cities, it is difficult to find a seventh child, let alone a seventh son! The idea of the monastery management forcing young girls under their care to be impregnated so that they can gather more scribes to document the birth and death data of the world is frightening!
As such, information like that belong to God. Would the forces of darkness be able to access such data? I choose to think that only God the Father alone knows when the end of the world is. It cannot be 2027 as recorded in any novel.
From my fairy tales days as a mum borrowing books for my young children, I have come across the superstition of a seventh son of a seventh son being a wizard. Well! I haven't some across one, have you? With very small families in our cities, it is difficult to find a seventh child, let alone a seventh son! The idea of the monastery management forcing young girls under their care to be impregnated so that they can gather more scribes to document the birth and death data of the world is frightening!
As such, information like that belong to God. Would the forces of darkness be able to access such data? I choose to think that only God the Father alone knows when the end of the world is. It cannot be 2027 as recorded in any novel.
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
(194) A rocking vehicle
The other day I drove along a busy road and found a parking lot near McDonald and Hong Kong
Bank. There was an empty lot on my left and then there was a blue Toyota parked next to it. Since Michael wanted to look for a book for his sister, I decided to wait in the car.
Where I was then was near an intersection with heavy traffic. Once people going straight stopped because of a red light, those who wish to turn left have to queue and wait. Off the periphery of my sight, I noticed the blue Toyota shaking. Well, perhaps a parent was waiting inside with two active kids! Next I heard a soft hoot. Looking all around, there was no reason for anyone to hoot at others. I followed the progress of two teenage girls with skirt and shorts that could not be any shorter along the road. There went a slightly louder hoot, this time I know it came from the blue Toyota. I saw arms flinging through the tinted window. The car began to rock again.
Oh! There must be two reckless individuals necking in a parked car in a very public place at six o'clock in the evening. Since sunset occurs at almost eight this time of year, it was bright day light then. Michael came back without buying anything. We drove off. He said that the risky behavior is called dogging in UK. Usually those involved are young people looking for thrills. Sex is blase, multiple partners are the norm, orgies may be old play... Yet these people are not up to the level of performing for the web cam. They choose a place where they might be challenged. All the more exciting if one of them is of the Muslim faith: any moment the religious police could come calling and they would be charged in a religious court. Perhaps they are exhibitionists! We were in a suburb, no where near any campuses. It is likely that those two are working folks. I was shocked and yet it was funny to imagine how uncomfortable they must be performing gymnastics in the limited space the two front seats offer.
Bank. There was an empty lot on my left and then there was a blue Toyota parked next to it. Since Michael wanted to look for a book for his sister, I decided to wait in the car.
Where I was then was near an intersection with heavy traffic. Once people going straight stopped because of a red light, those who wish to turn left have to queue and wait. Off the periphery of my sight, I noticed the blue Toyota shaking. Well, perhaps a parent was waiting inside with two active kids! Next I heard a soft hoot. Looking all around, there was no reason for anyone to hoot at others. I followed the progress of two teenage girls with skirt and shorts that could not be any shorter along the road. There went a slightly louder hoot, this time I know it came from the blue Toyota. I saw arms flinging through the tinted window. The car began to rock again.
Oh! There must be two reckless individuals necking in a parked car in a very public place at six o'clock in the evening. Since sunset occurs at almost eight this time of year, it was bright day light then. Michael came back without buying anything. We drove off. He said that the risky behavior is called dogging in UK. Usually those involved are young people looking for thrills. Sex is blase, multiple partners are the norm, orgies may be old play... Yet these people are not up to the level of performing for the web cam. They choose a place where they might be challenged. All the more exciting if one of them is of the Muslim faith: any moment the religious police could come calling and they would be charged in a religious court. Perhaps they are exhibitionists! We were in a suburb, no where near any campuses. It is likely that those two are working folks. I was shocked and yet it was funny to imagine how uncomfortable they must be performing gymnastics in the limited space the two front seats offer.
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