(1058) Children and parents

Now that I belong to the white hair wise person club, I look at my fellow members and learn a fair bit about life as a senior citizen.

There is Lydia, who passed away a few months ago. She had a full life, loving wife, good mother and dedicated teacher... Only one thing is missing, her two eligible sons are still single in their thirties. Her husband seems to think that perhaps the elder son may decide to tie the knot next year, after all, he had been with the same girl friend for at least six years.

Yesterday Amy fell down and went to the emergency room. Her sister drove at least three hours to get her to an x-ray machine. Since all the other sisters are indisposed, I accompanied them for the last hour and pushed the wheel chair in the public hospital. We three got home after midnight. At least one of the sisters has enough common sense to inform the son. When the doctor gave two weeks' medical leave, it must be pretty serious. She emerged with a full length leg cast. I learnt the next morning that her son was on the way back from Singapore.

We have Jane, her two sons do not lack female admirers. Yet both are single. Unless one knows the family dynamic, there is no earthly reason why the two handsome six feet sons are without fiancée. You see, they come from a wealthy family. The person who wields the baton is Jane, she insisted that her future daughters-in-law should stay in her mansion. Little wonder there are no takers. For my generation, Jane and Veronica both housed their in-laws. Jane bought a house and the in-laws moved in to keep an eye on the parade of maids for at least 15 years. Veronica moved in as a bride to her in-laws' bungalow and stayed in it long enough to buy up the lovely house from her brothers-in-law. Jane and Veronica are considered dutiful and filial. Sad to say, millennial girls don't buy that old fashion nonsense anymore. Should Jane and Veronica insist on staying in with their sons, the sons may not be married within the mums' life time. 

I have one son, he is thirty one years old. He lives across the sea a few hundred miles away. Should he marry a local from his resident home state, I may see my future daughter-in-law once a year, either during Chinese New Year, winter solstice, or moon cake festival. Perhaps because I don't have a few millions in the bank, or I am enlightened, I have little expectations in that area. It was a joy to bring up a son I am proud to have; my sacrifice, if any, is well worth it for he is a contributing member of the society he chose to embrace. I chose not to entertain any sense of entitlement.