(829) Spousal Abuse

Contrary to general thinking, highly educated women did and do get physically abused in their marriages.

In my last blog, we saw a fried noodle seller who seemed to get away with wife abuse. But this is really the tip of the ice berg. While I was bringing up my babies and toddlers, it is not unusual to see bruises on my neighbours in a poor neighbourhood.

 What was unusual was one case that went on for years in an expensive residential area. We were renting a detached house in a small town. I am certain it was definitely spousal abuse. I have seen the bruise that my friend was vainly trying to hide. Her maid told me why her Sir wacked her Mam. My friend's relative confirmed it.

But this woman steadfastly protected her husband. I sat with her regularly for tea once in a while for years. She slowly pulled herself out of her depression. She is not only a college graduate. She is a professional who holds a very important position in society. You may ask me why she decided to put up with it all? I may have lots of data I collected on her through the years, but honestly I can't tell you why. I don't think she loves him anymore. Neither is she financially dependent on him. Perhaps she feared him!? Perhaps she was afraid of losing her children. Maybe she did not want the the stigma of a divorce?!

Throughout this relationship of being neighbours, I was a listener. Whatever decisions she came to, I did not contribute to it directly. If I had been of help at all, the glory goes to God who taught me to listen through personal pain and recovery.