(819) Chinese weddings

My friend Mei Fang went to her home town that is four hundred km away to attend two weddings. She may be young but she is the grand aunt of one groom. Two months ago she was informed of the good news. But is it good news when she is tight financially? I could see her pushing off her house repair. She even stopped eating out to conserve cash.

At first she planned to buy a golden item for her cousin's daughter. After she took a look at the high rate of gold, she changed her mind. As she worried, her mum came to the rescue and told her that it is not necessary to spend that much money. After all these people are her near and dear relatives. They would understand that she does not have any spare cash at this point of life to splash. Since she had always been generous when she was doing better in the bygone years, it is not a sign of being mean.

The night before she left for the trip up north, she told me her game plan. Her mum said that the average gift (ang pow) for drinking the cup of tea served by the bride or groom is twenty dollars in the little village. She planned to have two packets for one set of newly weds -- that will be fifty times 2 = $100. She figured it this way, she came from the city and is considered an elder. An income earning grand aunt will be twice as generous as others. Then since the dinner is not held in a highly priced restaurant, she will give a gift of fifty dollars for herself instead of the average $20 each villager will give. That would mean she will spend $150 for one couple.

As it turned out, she has to come back early to make a presentation. As an accounts executive, she has not much of a choice over this matter. Her company can only survive through its employees putting in their best to win the contracts. And no one would change a client's choice of time and date of a presentation unless it is absolutely necessary.

Therefore she could not attend the second ceremony, nor could she grace the dinner. The only thing she needs to do is to turn up the day before to congratulate the bride-to-be and the parents. Then she would probably hand them a red packet and apologise for her would be absence. Let's say she puts in thirty dollars in the packet. That would be pretty good already. Without taking the seat nor consuming any food, she would be paying more than most villagers.

So apart from the petrol and toll, she could spend $180 plus some incidentals. Thank God for wise mothers.