There are sixth formers in my church in Sabah. STPM (formerly HSC, equivalent to GCE A-level) results come out in a much shorter time than 40 years previously.
While I waited for my HSC result, I worked as a temporary teacher in a Chinese Primary School in KL for a term. Similarly, my youngest worked at a law firm doing conveyance clerical work for 4 months. From that experience, she decided law is the last profession she wanted in town.
Joanna, who is a happy-go-lucky person in the Sabah church, could not find a job and seemed to cheerfully doodle at home. Yvonne is a little more assertive, she grabbed a tutoring job and has been almost tearing out her hair in struggling to teach since. In teaching, I started the ball rolling a few years before Form 6. In Form One I had a student who came to my house three times a week for English tutoring for a few months. His English did not improve much but his mum was quite pleased to see him lose a few pounds during those months. For whatever homework he did not do, he cheerfully skipped rope as punishment. The dad stopped sending him when he sensed the boy was not interested in improving his English. After LCE (now called PT3) I taught a few children in the neighbourhood for a few months. That was a learning experience for me. As the parents and the housekeeper were supportive, the children did improve much in English and Malay during that period.
Therefore I could see why Yvonne has such difficulties. Firstly most parents in Sabah just forked out money and left things pretty much to the tutor. Next thing to note is that the children could actually do substantial work during the school holidays if the parents and the nannies are supportive. Let's say the children come for one hour of tutoring three times per week, and they consistently do one hour of home exercise every week day, that would be 8 hours of work done per week. Assuming 6 weeks of work, it adds up to 48 hours of work done. We can see that judicially planned exercises done conscientiously work wonders with some explanation during lesson time.
By the time I was working as a temporary teacher, I realised that 9 years old are not the right age group for me. After strict streaming, 3E as a class is difficult to teach. I used to mark sentence making twice a week and journal writing weekly. The first was tough enough, it is the second that killed a novice teacher. It is funny that I did spend most of my adult life teaching remedial English to either college age classes or one-to-one tutoring to young children. At least it is much easier than attempting to teach a class of 48 children whom each required special attention.
Tuesday, June 16, 2020
(1246)Triple C
There are three men in my church, all transplants from out of town. One of their wives called them Triple C because all their family names begin with C.
Senior C1 hailed from the Capital city. C2 comes from Sarawak and C3 was born in Perlis. C1 accepted the Lord recently and was baptised. C2 has been a faithful servant of God for many years. It was he who brought C1 and C3 to his adopted church. I met up with C1's wife briefly right before I returned to the peninsular. She related the long story of how her husband ended up working in a plantation about an hour by car from where I live. I must say that it is rather unusual that a transplanted manager from hundreds of miles away would bump into two others to form a tightly knitted little care group for all practical purposes.
When one of the Cs was hospitalised, the second C took care of transportation and registration while the third C cooked for him and sent the food to the hospital. Then when the patient was discharged, he was taken back to the bigger apartment and the other two Cs cared for him until he could return to his working place.
For the current academic term, 3 teenagers from my church are going over to Perak to attend an English intensive course. One of the three Mrs C assumed the role of the guide to help them look for rooms and settle down. This is cultural exchange at its best in a country of two geographical portions separated by the South China Sea.
Senior C1 hailed from the Capital city. C2 comes from Sarawak and C3 was born in Perlis. C1 accepted the Lord recently and was baptised. C2 has been a faithful servant of God for many years. It was he who brought C1 and C3 to his adopted church. I met up with C1's wife briefly right before I returned to the peninsular. She related the long story of how her husband ended up working in a plantation about an hour by car from where I live. I must say that it is rather unusual that a transplanted manager from hundreds of miles away would bump into two others to form a tightly knitted little care group for all practical purposes.
When one of the Cs was hospitalised, the second C took care of transportation and registration while the third C cooked for him and sent the food to the hospital. Then when the patient was discharged, he was taken back to the bigger apartment and the other two Cs cared for him until he could return to his working place.
For the current academic term, 3 teenagers from my church are going over to Perak to attend an English intensive course. One of the three Mrs C assumed the role of the guide to help them look for rooms and settle down. This is cultural exchange at its best in a country of two geographical portions separated by the South China Sea.
(1245)Student housing
My thoughts turned to a young friend from Borneo who is currently studying on the island of Penang.
She paid more than a fair price for her room on the third floor. Since she needed air-conditioning, she puts up with $500 advance payment for electrical usage. Once the balance dips below $50, she has to top up with another $500. All the electricity used in her room was metered.
The unbelievable part is that while she has no water heater in an attached bathroom yet she is not allowed to use any kettle in her room. For drinking hot water, she has to collect it from downstairs from a dispenser. There are dogs downstairs within the premise and these dogs are bathed in the downstairs bathroom. Since she is not fond of dogs, she is therefore reluctant to be downstairs more than a few minutes at a time. She thinks that the downstairs bathroom is too dirty for human use. Yet that is the only source of hot water available to her. For someone who is thin and with low immune system, she regularly catches colds or flus in Penang. She chose this house to stay in because she doesn't have a car as well as she is nervous about driving on Penang island. Some of the roads in the city centre are rather narrow. From her present abode, she could walk to college within five minutes.
The thing that she mentioned that brought goose bumps along my spine is: there are at least two rats in her building. One fat one that she regularly saw behind the water dispenser. On the very next day after she first sighted the fat rat, she saw a thin, small one staring at her from her air-conditioning unit above her bed. Imagine the first thing one looks at in the morning is a rodent, what a "charming" place to reside in!
There were quite a few of us at the gathering when she related her harrowing experience. Each one came up with one suggestion or another. None could work out for her as she placed quite a number of limitations on her daily life. So it does look like she will have to rough it for all three long years. And this is where a foreign missionary couple could rent a sea-facing condo for $1,200 monthly with four rooms and three baths in relatively good condition in Tanjung Bungah, quite a good neighbourhood to me. Half the condos in that compound were empty, crying for tenants, just one year ago.
She paid more than a fair price for her room on the third floor. Since she needed air-conditioning, she puts up with $500 advance payment for electrical usage. Once the balance dips below $50, she has to top up with another $500. All the electricity used in her room was metered.
The unbelievable part is that while she has no water heater in an attached bathroom yet she is not allowed to use any kettle in her room. For drinking hot water, she has to collect it from downstairs from a dispenser. There are dogs downstairs within the premise and these dogs are bathed in the downstairs bathroom. Since she is not fond of dogs, she is therefore reluctant to be downstairs more than a few minutes at a time. She thinks that the downstairs bathroom is too dirty for human use. Yet that is the only source of hot water available to her. For someone who is thin and with low immune system, she regularly catches colds or flus in Penang. She chose this house to stay in because she doesn't have a car as well as she is nervous about driving on Penang island. Some of the roads in the city centre are rather narrow. From her present abode, she could walk to college within five minutes.
The thing that she mentioned that brought goose bumps along my spine is: there are at least two rats in her building. One fat one that she regularly saw behind the water dispenser. On the very next day after she first sighted the fat rat, she saw a thin, small one staring at her from her air-conditioning unit above her bed. Imagine the first thing one looks at in the morning is a rodent, what a "charming" place to reside in!
There were quite a few of us at the gathering when she related her harrowing experience. Each one came up with one suggestion or another. None could work out for her as she placed quite a number of limitations on her daily life. So it does look like she will have to rough it for all three long years. And this is where a foreign missionary couple could rent a sea-facing condo for $1,200 monthly with four rooms and three baths in relatively good condition in Tanjung Bungah, quite a good neighbourhood to me. Half the condos in that compound were empty, crying for tenants, just one year ago.
(1244) Visiting wet market
Believe it or not, it has been three years since I visited a wet market. Where my permanent home is, the only wet market is miles away and parking is hard to get. For two and a half years I did my marketing in nearby supermarkets.
For the previous two days, I bought stuff from a very small but clean wet market. On the first day, I chose to buy vegetables from the first right hand stall, as I had to break a $100 bill. On the second day, I patronised the third left hand stall. Prices were indeed a little steep in this second stall. I paid 70 cents for each medium size onion. However I found service quick and pleasant. Those who served me were from a country far away. Language had to be hand signals to simple, easy to understand Malay words. There after, for speed I chose the more pricey stall. The first right hand stall also served restaurants and cafes who phoned in orders. Patrons who come in person have to queue for payment. On that first day I moved over to buy eggs and fish from other stalls after choosing and placing my vegetables in a colander provided. By the time I returned to the first stop, all the patrons were gone. Prices were good, I could see.
On subsequent days, I walked out very early, by hurrying with my few purchases, I managed to walk back home way before sunlight hit the streets. Sometimes a few dollars could be spent to buy a little time so that one need not sweat excessively nor even be sun burnt.
For the previous two days, I bought stuff from a very small but clean wet market. On the first day, I chose to buy vegetables from the first right hand stall, as I had to break a $100 bill. On the second day, I patronised the third left hand stall. Prices were indeed a little steep in this second stall. I paid 70 cents for each medium size onion. However I found service quick and pleasant. Those who served me were from a country far away. Language had to be hand signals to simple, easy to understand Malay words. There after, for speed I chose the more pricey stall. The first right hand stall also served restaurants and cafes who phoned in orders. Patrons who come in person have to queue for payment. On that first day I moved over to buy eggs and fish from other stalls after choosing and placing my vegetables in a colander provided. By the time I returned to the first stop, all the patrons were gone. Prices were good, I could see.
On subsequent days, I walked out very early, by hurrying with my few purchases, I managed to walk back home way before sunlight hit the streets. Sometimes a few dollars could be spent to buy a little time so that one need not sweat excessively nor even be sun burnt.
(1243)Tibet's Secret Mountain by Chris Bonington; Charles Clark
It is amazing that the mountaineering bug would bite a person until he would climb mountains into his sixties.
To me, it is like the bug for reading. Once a person loves to read, he or she may read until well into old age. It is eye-opening to read about an outsider's view of China throughout the years of travel and climbing mountains. Tibet, to many of us armchair persons, is a cold and quaint land. It is fascinating to read about it, but I seriously doubt if I would ever travel there even if I have both the budget and the leisure.
To me, it is like the bug for reading. Once a person loves to read, he or she may read until well into old age. It is eye-opening to read about an outsider's view of China throughout the years of travel and climbing mountains. Tibet, to many of us armchair persons, is a cold and quaint land. It is fascinating to read about it, but I seriously doubt if I would ever travel there even if I have both the budget and the leisure.
Monday, June 15, 2020
(1242) Professional chief tenant
Very often we cannot get something for nothing. For example, I get a new life in Borneo by adapting to life in two little rooms in commercial quarters with very few amenities in the building.
I look at someone else's life with a nice big house, pleasant and conveniently located. Yet it is at the cost of putting up with six girls young enough to be her daughters. After all, they are like the daughters that she never had. So it is a part of the circle of life nevertheless.
After all, as a main tenant, the stay is free. One has to look after the cleanliness and enforce the rules for the common good. Should all six rooms be let, there is a surplus sum to pay a cleaner weekly, should the purse holder so desires. As she improves the house, she raises the rental accordingly. For two years she had had full house. The task of chief enforcer actually pays a generous food budget monthly.
One room is available for $450 a month in two months' time. Although there is no window facing outside. Guess one could not ask for everything. Getting eight out of ten points usually is sufficient. If the perspective tenant is smart, she should ask for an exhaust fan to be installed.
I look at someone else's life with a nice big house, pleasant and conveniently located. Yet it is at the cost of putting up with six girls young enough to be her daughters. After all, they are like the daughters that she never had. So it is a part of the circle of life nevertheless.
After all, as a main tenant, the stay is free. One has to look after the cleanliness and enforce the rules for the common good. Should all six rooms be let, there is a surplus sum to pay a cleaner weekly, should the purse holder so desires. As she improves the house, she raises the rental accordingly. For two years she had had full house. The task of chief enforcer actually pays a generous food budget monthly.
One room is available for $450 a month in two months' time. Although there is no window facing outside. Guess one could not ask for everything. Getting eight out of ten points usually is sufficient. If the perspective tenant is smart, she should ask for an exhaust fan to be installed.
(1241)Ambience
I am sitting in a harmoniously arranged living-dining area. The three main pieces of furnishing are a glass top long wooden table, six rattan chairs and two long sofas of off-white fabric and beige leather.
On one side, there was a square, good quality mirror with a line of knick-knacks along the lower edge. A vase of bare branch hung with Chinese New Year paper decorations on the left of the mirror. Next to the vase are two metallic shelves of plants in interesting receptacles. On the right of the mirror is a Yamaha piano and right in the corner of a two level stairs is a triangular old wooden whatnot displaying photos and sparking glasses. On blank pieces of walls we see an abstract picture and an old black and white framed travel itinerary in French.
I can't even begin to describe the restfulness of this 17x25 feet high ceiling room. Yet I know for a fact that most of these items came from various friends and acquaintances as well as sourced from discarded furniture from ex-pats moving out of their apartments. My hostess was a real estate agent before she returned to tertiary education in her early fifties. As a foreign student I have visited 14 families in the United States ranging from graduate students struggling to make ends meet to very wealthy families. Yet I must say that not in old money nor new wealth have I seen a place so well appointed yet it is homey and comfortable. Of course I have been to my boss' parents home in Houston which would have netted a 4-star rating. And I have been to two rustic country homes in Texas of millionaires, one from oil and the other from beer. Although those two places were something to talk about and admire, compared to the room I just described, they paled in terms of the sense of ease, peace and ambience.
On one side, there was a square, good quality mirror with a line of knick-knacks along the lower edge. A vase of bare branch hung with Chinese New Year paper decorations on the left of the mirror. Next to the vase are two metallic shelves of plants in interesting receptacles. On the right of the mirror is a Yamaha piano and right in the corner of a two level stairs is a triangular old wooden whatnot displaying photos and sparking glasses. On blank pieces of walls we see an abstract picture and an old black and white framed travel itinerary in French.
I can't even begin to describe the restfulness of this 17x25 feet high ceiling room. Yet I know for a fact that most of these items came from various friends and acquaintances as well as sourced from discarded furniture from ex-pats moving out of their apartments. My hostess was a real estate agent before she returned to tertiary education in her early fifties. As a foreign student I have visited 14 families in the United States ranging from graduate students struggling to make ends meet to very wealthy families. Yet I must say that not in old money nor new wealth have I seen a place so well appointed yet it is homey and comfortable. Of course I have been to my boss' parents home in Houston which would have netted a 4-star rating. And I have been to two rustic country homes in Texas of millionaires, one from oil and the other from beer. Although those two places were something to talk about and admire, compared to the room I just described, they paled in terms of the sense of ease, peace and ambience.
(1240) A thing of beauty
Looking at me, no one would suspect that I love beauty in odd things. The only item in my home that I want to transfer to Borneo someday is a round slab of black marble. Talking about marble, most marble tables are white and green where I come from. We do see black marble with glittering bits in major banks and exclusive hotels. Once my husband and I admired yellow marble in Danang, Vietnam on a flying visit.
Many years ago, an old friend bought the present marble slab for five thousand ringgit. I used to frequent her house to talk, to eat and to hang out as fellow homemakers. When she needed cash, one of her brothers offered $200 for the table. Another sibling offered to take it off her hands for free as the former figured she had to pay for transportation to haul the slab and the heavy stand from one house to the other. There I was, day in and day out I walked past it, touched it with wonder and looked at it with admiration. I actually thought black marble is much more beautiful than the traditionally white marble table tops. When the owner of the marble table finally moved out to one room, she gave the table to me because I love and thought it exotic.
I keep it because I like to look at it and touch its cool surface. Nature produced such pleasant looking things that the best inventors could not counterfeit in completeness. Of course I am aware of its financial value as a second hand item. I would have treasured such a thing of beauty even if it is not worth a cent on e-bay.
Many years ago, an old friend bought the present marble slab for five thousand ringgit. I used to frequent her house to talk, to eat and to hang out as fellow homemakers. When she needed cash, one of her brothers offered $200 for the table. Another sibling offered to take it off her hands for free as the former figured she had to pay for transportation to haul the slab and the heavy stand from one house to the other. There I was, day in and day out I walked past it, touched it with wonder and looked at it with admiration. I actually thought black marble is much more beautiful than the traditionally white marble table tops. When the owner of the marble table finally moved out to one room, she gave the table to me because I love and thought it exotic.
I keep it because I like to look at it and touch its cool surface. Nature produced such pleasant looking things that the best inventors could not counterfeit in completeness. Of course I am aware of its financial value as a second hand item. I would have treasured such a thing of beauty even if it is not worth a cent on e-bay.
(1239)When god doesn't answer your prayer by Jerry Sittser
I am surprised that I finished reading this book in my friend's house. Normally I would grab every opportunity to read and blog on Reader's Digest Condensed Books and most fictions. However, all the books I saw in this friend's house previously belonged to a daughter who has since married and moved away. Thus apart from writing and typing from written manuscripts, I started reading what caught my eyes.
For one who has sat in church long enough, the common answer is that God could say yes, no, or wait to any prayer. The single prayer I have prayed over the years regarding my father's salvation took 26 years to come to pass. I am thankful that after waiting a long time, God did say yes so graciously.
But of course for anyone who prays earnestly through the years over many matters, some prayers were not answered. In this book I learned that prayers were not centred on the answers, it is centred on our relationships with God. For a person who faithfully prays, it is he who was changed in a manner that enables him to help change the world in his corner. In other words prayer is a "dangerous" thing, it changes us, takes us out of our comfort zones to work out the matter we pray about.
For one who has sat in church long enough, the common answer is that God could say yes, no, or wait to any prayer. The single prayer I have prayed over the years regarding my father's salvation took 26 years to come to pass. I am thankful that after waiting a long time, God did say yes so graciously.
But of course for anyone who prays earnestly through the years over many matters, some prayers were not answered. In this book I learned that prayers were not centred on the answers, it is centred on our relationships with God. For a person who faithfully prays, it is he who was changed in a manner that enables him to help change the world in his corner. In other words prayer is a "dangerous" thing, it changes us, takes us out of our comfort zones to work out the matter we pray about.
(1238)Shaking hands with death by terry pratchett
As part of the Baby Boomers generation, I am seeing more and more cases of Parkinson's, Alzheimer's, dementia, ... in folks mainly older than I. But sometimes in a few who are younger than 60.
A family friend, Fillip, recently died from some urinary ailment. His main complaint was he could no longer chew solid food. A soft diet of porridge and milk simply could not deliver enough nutrients to keep his body functioning. But what could a 91 year old man expect? Many parts of his aging body were almost worn out. He was getting increasingly forgetful, when he could no longer sign a legible signature to cash a cheque, he had to resort to transferring all his funds to his wife's account. His daughter and nephew would prefer to send him to a nursing home, he objected. His wife valiantly soldiered on...
My uncle was 89, suffering from Alzheimer's, when he fell and injured his head. He did not wake up from surgery. His brain was sufficiently affected by the disorder that his wife had to whisper to my mum and I not to believe what he claimed. The last two times we talked to him, facts essentially changed enough in his memory that we had to listen to things that were not true and we tried hard not to argue with him.
His elder sister of 92 was hospitalised last December. Her muscular-skeletal system was good, but sad that the part of the brain that help her balance malfunctioned. She would wake up and struggled to stand up, yet failed to do so and fell. Her short term memory was reduced to a few minutes at best, thus the constant struggling and falling repeated itself.
My sympathies go to the overworked caregivers. A person who has lost his or her mind is no longer the person we knew them as. The third person mentioned above recognises no one. She is blissfully happy living in her own made up world. The second person was a little paranoid about others poaching on his property or his cash, one had to humour him to get along with him.
I have a lot of respect for Pratchett to bring up the no win topic of a good, dignified death. It is much needed in every country where the life expectancy of people crosses 72.
A family friend, Fillip, recently died from some urinary ailment. His main complaint was he could no longer chew solid food. A soft diet of porridge and milk simply could not deliver enough nutrients to keep his body functioning. But what could a 91 year old man expect? Many parts of his aging body were almost worn out. He was getting increasingly forgetful, when he could no longer sign a legible signature to cash a cheque, he had to resort to transferring all his funds to his wife's account. His daughter and nephew would prefer to send him to a nursing home, he objected. His wife valiantly soldiered on...
My uncle was 89, suffering from Alzheimer's, when he fell and injured his head. He did not wake up from surgery. His brain was sufficiently affected by the disorder that his wife had to whisper to my mum and I not to believe what he claimed. The last two times we talked to him, facts essentially changed enough in his memory that we had to listen to things that were not true and we tried hard not to argue with him.
His elder sister of 92 was hospitalised last December. Her muscular-skeletal system was good, but sad that the part of the brain that help her balance malfunctioned. She would wake up and struggled to stand up, yet failed to do so and fell. Her short term memory was reduced to a few minutes at best, thus the constant struggling and falling repeated itself.
My sympathies go to the overworked caregivers. A person who has lost his or her mind is no longer the person we knew them as. The third person mentioned above recognises no one. She is blissfully happy living in her own made up world. The second person was a little paranoid about others poaching on his property or his cash, one had to humour him to get along with him.
I have a lot of respect for Pratchett to bring up the no win topic of a good, dignified death. It is much needed in every country where the life expectancy of people crosses 72.
(1237)Playing for pizza
After living a few years in America, I fully appreciate the place American football occupies there. For secondary school children in Sabah, it is Rugby. In Peninsular Malaysia, it is soccer.
It is therefore interesting to find that folks actually play football in Italy. The idea that they have a Superbowl there boggles my mind. Lately Italy is one of the countries where Corona virus seemed to pass from village to village killing many people. Perhaps one of the Chinese Medical Team's observation of Italians wearing their outdoor shoes indoor giving the virus unbridle means of infecting more and more persons is the crucial difference between European and Asian culture. It has been said that the mountainous terrain of Italy tends to make one area isolated from another. Then the longevity of the aging population possibly make the country a prime target for the relentless attack by the fast mutating virus. The western concept of personal freedom being supreme made it difficult for public order to be enforced. All these factors are contributing causes to the rapid spread of disease in that country.
Would Italy be the same joyous place I read about in this book after this pandemic ends?
It is therefore interesting to find that folks actually play football in Italy. The idea that they have a Superbowl there boggles my mind. Lately Italy is one of the countries where Corona virus seemed to pass from village to village killing many people. Perhaps one of the Chinese Medical Team's observation of Italians wearing their outdoor shoes indoor giving the virus unbridle means of infecting more and more persons is the crucial difference between European and Asian culture. It has been said that the mountainous terrain of Italy tends to make one area isolated from another. Then the longevity of the aging population possibly make the country a prime target for the relentless attack by the fast mutating virus. The western concept of personal freedom being supreme made it difficult for public order to be enforced. All these factors are contributing causes to the rapid spread of disease in that country.
Would Italy be the same joyous place I read about in this book after this pandemic ends?
(1236)George Muller by Janet & Geoff Benge
This is the second biography of Muller I have read. The first one I borrowed from a church library probably 20 years ago, that dealt with his life work of opening orphanages and bringing up orphans in a big way.
This book, however, uses 5 chapters to show us the earlier life of Muller. Apparently, he was quite a scoundrel before he followed Christ in Theological Seminary. It was in Herr Kayser's Bible Meeting that he met God. He went there to get ideas on how to preach, after all, he was being educated to become a pastor. Apart from bible reading, hymn singing, it was the sermon reading that brought about his abrupt change of heart. After that conviction of heart, he became a new person mightily used by God to improve the lives of thousands of orphans. Amazing achievement for someone who depends only on prayers.
This book, however, uses 5 chapters to show us the earlier life of Muller. Apparently, he was quite a scoundrel before he followed Christ in Theological Seminary. It was in Herr Kayser's Bible Meeting that he met God. He went there to get ideas on how to preach, after all, he was being educated to become a pastor. Apart from bible reading, hymn singing, it was the sermon reading that brought about his abrupt change of heart. After that conviction of heart, he became a new person mightily used by God to improve the lives of thousands of orphans. Amazing achievement for someone who depends only on prayers.
(1235)contrasting living conditions
As I walked from the kitchen to the dining and the sitting room in the mornings, I get glimpses of the individual rooms of tenants as they move in or out. Since the chief tenant and I would use the public space at will, I wonder what it felt like to be confined to a 10x12 feet room outside of class or work time? Most of them, I notice, eat their meals in their individual rooms.
In comparison, I am fortunate to have the space of 30x65 feet in Sabah even though the work and bed rooms cover perhaps one third of that area. In spite of the fact that the landlady's miscellaneous equipment for a defunct restaurant and a thriving catering business is scattered outside of the two little rooms, it is still wonderful to have the run of the entire first floor except for the daily visit of the landlady in adding or retrieving ingredients from the deep chest freezers for her business. She cooks either in her apartment or her sister's big wooden house in the outskirts of the city. The same sister rears 200 chickens for sale all around the spacious house. Their 82 year old mother, still plants and harvests vegetables for sale, lives next door to the said sister. Talk about the long and active lives of the seniors living in the land below the wind.
In comparison, I am fortunate to have the space of 30x65 feet in Sabah even though the work and bed rooms cover perhaps one third of that area. In spite of the fact that the landlady's miscellaneous equipment for a defunct restaurant and a thriving catering business is scattered outside of the two little rooms, it is still wonderful to have the run of the entire first floor except for the daily visit of the landlady in adding or retrieving ingredients from the deep chest freezers for her business. She cooks either in her apartment or her sister's big wooden house in the outskirts of the city. The same sister rears 200 chickens for sale all around the spacious house. Their 82 year old mother, still plants and harvests vegetables for sale, lives next door to the said sister. Talk about the long and active lives of the seniors living in the land below the wind.
(1234) Being green
As I listened to the sound of hair dryer in operation, I thought of two men.
One is a bright spark in Thailand. He is very careful of his carbon footprint. Hair dryer and air-conditioners are deemed non-essential. But his wife and daughters keep long hair. Without the use of a hairdryer, washing hair at night would not be easy.
The other is my cousin. When he is at home, each member of the family and a hapless visitor like me would have to turn off the fan as soon as we stand up to leave the room. Else we risk his ire and we would see a black face for a while. One January I saw the electric bill was $18.96. He need not pay that bill as the city council waived payment of any bill below $20.00. The following month the bill was even lower, $12.07, as the family was away for 7 days out of the preceding 30 days. I marvel at the low power usage of a house with four bedrooms, three baths, two air-conditioners, 4 adults living full time within! Unbelievable!
One is a bright spark in Thailand. He is very careful of his carbon footprint. Hair dryer and air-conditioners are deemed non-essential. But his wife and daughters keep long hair. Without the use of a hairdryer, washing hair at night would not be easy.
The other is my cousin. When he is at home, each member of the family and a hapless visitor like me would have to turn off the fan as soon as we stand up to leave the room. Else we risk his ire and we would see a black face for a while. One January I saw the electric bill was $18.96. He need not pay that bill as the city council waived payment of any bill below $20.00. The following month the bill was even lower, $12.07, as the family was away for 7 days out of the preceding 30 days. I marvel at the low power usage of a house with four bedrooms, three baths, two air-conditioners, 4 adults living full time within! Unbelievable!
(1233) Living in a borading house
It is interesting to be downstairs, cooking fish porridge as I observe the tenants who are getting ready to go out for the day. By the look of their attire, most of them are probably students with their backpacks.
Each girl is different in their morning routines. One boiled an entire kettle and brought it back to her room. Two collected cooled boiled water from the jug or dispenser. Two girls shared one bathroom upstairs. Each of them paid more than the others who shared the one downstairs. For a house with seven rooms, three bathrooms seem inadequate. But they know each other's routine and the downstairs bathroom usage worked like a choreographed dance of ballet.
I realise by looking at them, I was extremely fortunate that I have full room and board during my college days. For the interim between graduation and marriage, I was back with my family. Hence this studying or working from a rooming house is new to me. I guess my youngest is very blessed that she roomed with a wonderful family near the train station a stop from University. She was there for 5 years for her Bachelor's and Master's degrees. Now she is back at home within walking distance from a newly minted train station on another line. Thus she too was spared from a boarding house experience.
Each girl is different in their morning routines. One boiled an entire kettle and brought it back to her room. Two collected cooled boiled water from the jug or dispenser. Two girls shared one bathroom upstairs. Each of them paid more than the others who shared the one downstairs. For a house with seven rooms, three bathrooms seem inadequate. But they know each other's routine and the downstairs bathroom usage worked like a choreographed dance of ballet.
I realise by looking at them, I was extremely fortunate that I have full room and board during my college days. For the interim between graduation and marriage, I was back with my family. Hence this studying or working from a rooming house is new to me. I guess my youngest is very blessed that she roomed with a wonderful family near the train station a stop from University. She was there for 5 years for her Bachelor's and Master's degrees. Now she is back at home within walking distance from a newly minted train station on another line. Thus she too was spared from a boarding house experience.
(1232)Sunset industry
Talking about artificial intelligence, I think of how self driving vehicles would make the jobs of drivers obsolete.
There is a father, who is a well-paid accountant, told his 13 year old son that his profession would be progressively taken on by computer programs. If any accountants are needed in his son's generation, it would be few and the nature of the job very different from his. He told his son who is good in science to aim to be an engineer.
Yesterday I found out that Zelda's god daughter was qualifying as an accountant. Now I wonder what the 22 year old young person would face in her next 38 years of employment? This young lady is in her final semester before graduation. Then she would face a much higher hurdle to pass her professional exam.
I remember how I heard that work in the electronic factories in Malaysia would be considered sun-set industry in the 1980s. Yet I know personally a man, who is the husband of my office manager in a private college I taught in, worked in his one job since graduation. He actually retired from that same job in the same department after 4 changes of ownership in 2018.
Of course his university mate moved from quality assurance to banking. Another colleague of the husband mentioned in the above paragraph took a voluntary resignation with compensation and changed line to real estate. Yet the interesting point is that at least one person did stick to and actually finished his working life in a sunset industry.
There is a father, who is a well-paid accountant, told his 13 year old son that his profession would be progressively taken on by computer programs. If any accountants are needed in his son's generation, it would be few and the nature of the job very different from his. He told his son who is good in science to aim to be an engineer.
Yesterday I found out that Zelda's god daughter was qualifying as an accountant. Now I wonder what the 22 year old young person would face in her next 38 years of employment? This young lady is in her final semester before graduation. Then she would face a much higher hurdle to pass her professional exam.
I remember how I heard that work in the electronic factories in Malaysia would be considered sun-set industry in the 1980s. Yet I know personally a man, who is the husband of my office manager in a private college I taught in, worked in his one job since graduation. He actually retired from that same job in the same department after 4 changes of ownership in 2018.
Of course his university mate moved from quality assurance to banking. Another colleague of the husband mentioned in the above paragraph took a voluntary resignation with compensation and changed line to real estate. Yet the interesting point is that at least one person did stick to and actually finished his working life in a sunset industry.
(1231)Thinking out of the box
In a lovely garden of varied plants, we find boxes of papers immersed in water. It took great self control on my part not to ask. Slowly, the story unfolded: a friend who had accumulated boxes of correspondence was planning to leave the country. She no longer worked therefore had no access to paper shredder. Daily she worried about those documents as we are all concern about digital identity and security.
Out came our heroine who produced a neat solution. She noticed that water removed ink and dissolved paper. Hence wet documents would disintegrate and all confidential information would be safe from any prying eyes. As the paper fell to fragments, pieces of plastic from official envelopes could be easily picked up from the mixture. Then our resourceful person dried them in batches in the tropical sun. These paper pulp was then added, some to line flower pots bottom, some to the trash. Voila! Problem solved! Talk about thinking out of the box!
Out came our heroine who produced a neat solution. She noticed that water removed ink and dissolved paper. Hence wet documents would disintegrate and all confidential information would be safe from any prying eyes. As the paper fell to fragments, pieces of plastic from official envelopes could be easily picked up from the mixture. Then our resourceful person dried them in batches in the tropical sun. These paper pulp was then added, some to line flower pots bottom, some to the trash. Voila! Problem solved! Talk about thinking out of the box!
(1230)Crystal's friends
Many years ago, it was reported that two corpses, a mother and her daughter, were removed from a Canning Garden house. The daughter happened to be a member of Crystal's old church. The former lived in a double-storey house with her bed-ridden mum. There was no helper. Mother and daughter would eat packed hawker food daily.
People in church would kindly drop old TV or whatever mum and daughter lacked in their bare house. Crystal was by no means rich, she too bought slippers for the daughter when the old ones gave way. When neighbours complained to the police, a team came to break the locks and remove the decomposing bodies. It was found by autopsies that the daughter died of a massive stroke while watching TV. A few days later, the mother died of dehydration.
After the news broke, various relatives turned up. Apparently mum and daughter jointly owned ten shop buildings in town. Rental collected monthly reaches $30,000. There were $10 millions in fixed deposit in various banks. Yet the "poor" old lady could not shout loud enough to get help. The land line was ten feet or so from the hospital bed in the sitting room. She literally starved for a few days until she died of thirst. Imagine a millionaire died like a beggar in any fourth world way side.
Millions and the love for it could be a terrible slave driving force. Both mum and daughters were slaves to their hidden millions. They lived like paupers throughout their lives.
People in church would kindly drop old TV or whatever mum and daughter lacked in their bare house. Crystal was by no means rich, she too bought slippers for the daughter when the old ones gave way. When neighbours complained to the police, a team came to break the locks and remove the decomposing bodies. It was found by autopsies that the daughter died of a massive stroke while watching TV. A few days later, the mother died of dehydration.
After the news broke, various relatives turned up. Apparently mum and daughter jointly owned ten shop buildings in town. Rental collected monthly reaches $30,000. There were $10 millions in fixed deposit in various banks. Yet the "poor" old lady could not shout loud enough to get help. The land line was ten feet or so from the hospital bed in the sitting room. She literally starved for a few days until she died of thirst. Imagine a millionaire died like a beggar in any fourth world way side.
Millions and the love for it could be a terrible slave driving force. Both mum and daughters were slaves to their hidden millions. They lived like paupers throughout their lives.
(1229) Sticky end?
My eldest child has this theory that old folks with too much money would face difficult ends.
In Mei Lian's case, it is quite true. She has outlived her husband and all her sisters. As she wanted, she accumulated lots of money in the bank. Yet, for what? To make enemies of kind church members who took her in? To have a "rubbish" house for the Filipino maid to treasure hunt in? To leave the entire caboodle to the trusted lawyer who is rather high-handed to her nephew and nieces?
Mrs Lee, who lost time and money for meals who tried to sort out Lian's financial affairs, finally threw her hands up and refused to be involved anymore. Just as well the former is selling her Silver City house and stay on permanently in the capital city with her daughter. If not Lian would continue to take advantage of Mrs Lee and foul things up for any kind bank officials. Apparently Lian made a formal complaint against a very helpful and honest bank officer. Mrs Lee said that unless the officer with the complaint as a black mark change job, she would not be promoted throughout her working life.
Lian would sleep on the sitting room sofa with all the lights on in her inherited house. Perhaps she was afraid of her three deceased sisters coming back to take her to task. After all, she left two sisters' urns behind a coffin shop open to the elements. The life of a wealthy woman with a few millions in the bank is not good. She eats take out food. All the rooms in her house are full of her dead sisters' old things. That house was filled to overflowing with three spinsters' frugal living. Nothing had been thrown away for the past 30 years. The house was dim, dusty and dirty. I remember I had to remove things from a chair if I wanted to sit down to wait for Lian to get ready for an outing. I used to car sit for her whenever she summered in New Zealand. Her car had been a great blessing to my family. She has been a most fair car owner and treated me well. I guess I took very good care of her cars for a few stints. It ended when my family moved away.
Money is a good servant but a terrible master.
In Mei Lian's case, it is quite true. She has outlived her husband and all her sisters. As she wanted, she accumulated lots of money in the bank. Yet, for what? To make enemies of kind church members who took her in? To have a "rubbish" house for the Filipino maid to treasure hunt in? To leave the entire caboodle to the trusted lawyer who is rather high-handed to her nephew and nieces?
Mrs Lee, who lost time and money for meals who tried to sort out Lian's financial affairs, finally threw her hands up and refused to be involved anymore. Just as well the former is selling her Silver City house and stay on permanently in the capital city with her daughter. If not Lian would continue to take advantage of Mrs Lee and foul things up for any kind bank officials. Apparently Lian made a formal complaint against a very helpful and honest bank officer. Mrs Lee said that unless the officer with the complaint as a black mark change job, she would not be promoted throughout her working life.
Lian would sleep on the sitting room sofa with all the lights on in her inherited house. Perhaps she was afraid of her three deceased sisters coming back to take her to task. After all, she left two sisters' urns behind a coffin shop open to the elements. The life of a wealthy woman with a few millions in the bank is not good. She eats take out food. All the rooms in her house are full of her dead sisters' old things. That house was filled to overflowing with three spinsters' frugal living. Nothing had been thrown away for the past 30 years. The house was dim, dusty and dirty. I remember I had to remove things from a chair if I wanted to sit down to wait for Lian to get ready for an outing. I used to car sit for her whenever she summered in New Zealand. Her car had been a great blessing to my family. She has been a most fair car owner and treated me well. I guess I took very good care of her cars for a few stints. It ended when my family moved away.
Money is a good servant but a terrible master.
(1228) Merry widow
There is a widow who lives a few doors from me. She knows everybody in the neighbourhood. As things go, she is one of the most friendly persons I've known these thirty years or so.
It is a good thing that she is shrewd and manages to hide the fact that she is an heiress. Even her husband did not know of her trust fund income. She has a good friend who allows her to use the latter's mailing address for investments and bank statements. There she is, an ordinary middle age woman who drives a tiny car. While her children were schooling, she was a transportation lady for school and tutoring classes. After all, might as well pick up a few hundreds while ferrying her children around.
After her husband passed on rather suddenly due to respiratory problems, folks were recommending her part-time jobs left and right. It was out of good intentions to help her as she looked distraught and haggard. Little did others know that it was not finances that caused her stress. It was her three children and her mother's disagreements that caused her much headaches until the legacies were safely banked away. Then she bounced back to her happy-go-lucky self. The last time I met her, she was back into her swing of ballroom dancing classes, line dancing mornings and other social whirls.
It is a good thing that she is shrewd and manages to hide the fact that she is an heiress. Even her husband did not know of her trust fund income. She has a good friend who allows her to use the latter's mailing address for investments and bank statements. There she is, an ordinary middle age woman who drives a tiny car. While her children were schooling, she was a transportation lady for school and tutoring classes. After all, might as well pick up a few hundreds while ferrying her children around.
After her husband passed on rather suddenly due to respiratory problems, folks were recommending her part-time jobs left and right. It was out of good intentions to help her as she looked distraught and haggard. Little did others know that it was not finances that caused her stress. It was her three children and her mother's disagreements that caused her much headaches until the legacies were safely banked away. Then she bounced back to her happy-go-lucky self. The last time I met her, she was back into her swing of ballroom dancing classes, line dancing mornings and other social whirls.
(1227) Fishes
I was sitting outside watching my friend emptying muddy water and removing fishes from one container to another. While all the tenants enjoy the sight of the water plants and flowers, there is actually much maintenance work involved.
She kept two bottom feeders in each big receptacle, she calls them "Bandaraya" (Malay word for city council refuse removal). Then about two pairs of ordinary hardy fish we called drain fish. That way the fishes would eat up the ever present mosquito larvae. It is then a necessity to have a lot of floating plants to hide the fishes from king fishers. I remember my Silver City neighbour who took the trouble to net up her ornamental pond for the protection of fishes from birds. Another neighbour spent thousands to buy fishes that are too big for birds to catch.
While I enjoy observing cats, my friend loves flowers and beautifully shaped leaves.
She kept two bottom feeders in each big receptacle, she calls them "Bandaraya" (Malay word for city council refuse removal). Then about two pairs of ordinary hardy fish we called drain fish. That way the fishes would eat up the ever present mosquito larvae. It is then a necessity to have a lot of floating plants to hide the fishes from king fishers. I remember my Silver City neighbour who took the trouble to net up her ornamental pond for the protection of fishes from birds. Another neighbour spent thousands to buy fishes that are too big for birds to catch.
While I enjoy observing cats, my friend loves flowers and beautifully shaped leaves.
(1226) Visits to China
Mum's earlier visits to China were with my cousin, father or eldest brother.
In 1998 I saved up some money from home tutoring. With substantial help from my brothers, I went for my first visit to China with mum and my children. Since the early years of communist rule, China had come a long way by then. In 1960 my grandma had problem finding sufficient acceptable food to eat. That was the year she was 55 according to the western calendar. Chinese babies at birth were considered 1 year old. Therefore by the Chinese lunar calendar, grandma was 56 when she could apply to the Home Office to visit her youngest son for the first time. She bought a sewing machine and a bicycle vouchers in Hong Kong and my uncle collected the items in Kwangchow. Actually that was her first flight ever, thirty six years ago she arrived in Singapore by ship.
Grandma related how my uncle queued two whole hours to buy two miserable looking pineapples. While he was jubilant, she did not have the heart to eat any piece he offered. Uncle ate one whole fruit in record time. He saved the other for his buddies. The pineapples were sour, picked before they were ripe. Yet these were rare delicacies from Hainan Island. It was seldom seen sold in the tiny town two hours north of Kwangchow. There was one visit my grandma came back with only clothes on her back. She gave all her spare clothes away as she could not bear seeing her loved ones in tatters. Even her old battered cardboard suitcase was toted away as a winter clothes storage container. She related small incidences with tears in her eyes, my dad explained that years with no extras actually impoverishes the people to the extent they have nothing except a change of rags and daily food. He said it was not greed, it was a great need for daily necessities when folks are barely surviving.
By the time my mum was old enough to visit China, things were much improved from my grandma's days. Yet I still hear of door less public toilets in the rural area. President Nixon made his historic visit to Beijing. Dr Mahathir, the then Prime Minister to Malaysia befriended China the economic powerhouse. Finally China is opened to a relatively young person like me. When I first mooted the idea of visiting my uncle, I asked people if I need to prepare an umbrella for toilet visits. Folks had a good laugh and asked if I was planning to go to the countryside miles from the city. I said, of course not, if I wanted to rough it, I might as well go into Division Four of Sarawak to get close to nature.
So we departed and my children were dazzled by the huge four storey bookshop in Kwangchow. My youngest was excited about the first photo she captured of a long tail jungle fowl in a park reserve near my uncle's town. My eldest was happily occupied reading the English translation of all my bi-lingual selections bought as gifts. I had a smashing time selecting fitting presents for adults and children from those very economical range of books, from proverbs to folk tales to classics.
Quite a few years later, my youngest was no longer seven years old. She was a strapping young lady strong enough to carry my mum's luggage as well as her own. With my language skills (I had six years of Chinese elementary education) and her muscle power, we did quite well. This trip we did not eat a single home cooked meal, even though my uncle was still cooking for his own family before and after our visit. My aunt explained that the per capita income in China doubled and tripled through the preceding 8-10 years, my uncle and her still kept their thrifty way of life. They hardly spent a tenth of their combined income monthly. Hence every meal was eaten in some famous restaurants. Images of those banquets were in some computer's hard discs or external drives. Ever since hand phones come into vogue, every meal of significance was immortalised in digital form and stored away.
After we returned, my mum declared it would be her last trip to visit her brother. Since then, my uncle and his son came to visit us on three separate trips. While I am not mercenary, I should mention that my uncle was dispensing cash like Santa Claus during his last trip. Just about every grand-niece and nephew each received RMB1,000. These days China dollars strengthened against the Ringgit and that meant on certain days, the exchange would be close to R$600 for 1000 Yuan. My youngest kept hers for a planned visit to her fifth grandaunt on my husband side, of course she would keep one meal that she would have with my uncle and family. After she handed in her Master's dissertation, she deliberately made up days in her part-time employment to allow herself a short visit to Kwangchow. I declined going on dietary grounds. My husband went with her and they had a wonderful time with the grandaunt's family. Matriarch Ho, eldest son, eldest daughter-in-law, eldest grandson and great-grandson. Unfortunately, the timing was such that while they were in China, the eldest grandson was in hospital because of an occupational eye-strain. Even the eldest grandson's brother -in-law who was waiting for results was pressed into night duty looking after the critically-ill young man who needed complete quiet bed rest.
Even though my youngest was "banana" through and through, her smattering of "Mandarin", gestures and mimes got her through the 5-day visit. They laughed and laughed over the language gaps. It sounded like a really fun visit. My daughter is a person with charisma and she received favours everywhere she went. Her grandaunt enjoyed her piano playing so much in her second trip that she was invited to visit again. During her third visit it was the eldest son and daughter-in-law who invited her to visit again and they said make it a longer visit so they could take her to more places of interest.
This is 2020. Sometime right before Chinese New Year, I was mooting about taking some savings to send my youngest and my mum back for a 4-day trip to Kwangchow. I was planning on business class tickets and 3 nights in a 3-star hotel close to my cousin's condo. Alas! Corona virus struck. I kept quiet about the outlandish idea. Only my eldest heard about it way before the lock down in Wuhan. He warned me that such a pandemic would make a social visit impossible for 2 to 3 years. Which by then it would be too late for my mum to fly, she is already 88 this year. Anyway, it was a wonderful brain wave while the idea lasted.
In 1998 I saved up some money from home tutoring. With substantial help from my brothers, I went for my first visit to China with mum and my children. Since the early years of communist rule, China had come a long way by then. In 1960 my grandma had problem finding sufficient acceptable food to eat. That was the year she was 55 according to the western calendar. Chinese babies at birth were considered 1 year old. Therefore by the Chinese lunar calendar, grandma was 56 when she could apply to the Home Office to visit her youngest son for the first time. She bought a sewing machine and a bicycle vouchers in Hong Kong and my uncle collected the items in Kwangchow. Actually that was her first flight ever, thirty six years ago she arrived in Singapore by ship.
Grandma related how my uncle queued two whole hours to buy two miserable looking pineapples. While he was jubilant, she did not have the heart to eat any piece he offered. Uncle ate one whole fruit in record time. He saved the other for his buddies. The pineapples were sour, picked before they were ripe. Yet these were rare delicacies from Hainan Island. It was seldom seen sold in the tiny town two hours north of Kwangchow. There was one visit my grandma came back with only clothes on her back. She gave all her spare clothes away as she could not bear seeing her loved ones in tatters. Even her old battered cardboard suitcase was toted away as a winter clothes storage container. She related small incidences with tears in her eyes, my dad explained that years with no extras actually impoverishes the people to the extent they have nothing except a change of rags and daily food. He said it was not greed, it was a great need for daily necessities when folks are barely surviving.
By the time my mum was old enough to visit China, things were much improved from my grandma's days. Yet I still hear of door less public toilets in the rural area. President Nixon made his historic visit to Beijing. Dr Mahathir, the then Prime Minister to Malaysia befriended China the economic powerhouse. Finally China is opened to a relatively young person like me. When I first mooted the idea of visiting my uncle, I asked people if I need to prepare an umbrella for toilet visits. Folks had a good laugh and asked if I was planning to go to the countryside miles from the city. I said, of course not, if I wanted to rough it, I might as well go into Division Four of Sarawak to get close to nature.
So we departed and my children were dazzled by the huge four storey bookshop in Kwangchow. My youngest was excited about the first photo she captured of a long tail jungle fowl in a park reserve near my uncle's town. My eldest was happily occupied reading the English translation of all my bi-lingual selections bought as gifts. I had a smashing time selecting fitting presents for adults and children from those very economical range of books, from proverbs to folk tales to classics.
Quite a few years later, my youngest was no longer seven years old. She was a strapping young lady strong enough to carry my mum's luggage as well as her own. With my language skills (I had six years of Chinese elementary education) and her muscle power, we did quite well. This trip we did not eat a single home cooked meal, even though my uncle was still cooking for his own family before and after our visit. My aunt explained that the per capita income in China doubled and tripled through the preceding 8-10 years, my uncle and her still kept their thrifty way of life. They hardly spent a tenth of their combined income monthly. Hence every meal was eaten in some famous restaurants. Images of those banquets were in some computer's hard discs or external drives. Ever since hand phones come into vogue, every meal of significance was immortalised in digital form and stored away.
After we returned, my mum declared it would be her last trip to visit her brother. Since then, my uncle and his son came to visit us on three separate trips. While I am not mercenary, I should mention that my uncle was dispensing cash like Santa Claus during his last trip. Just about every grand-niece and nephew each received RMB1,000. These days China dollars strengthened against the Ringgit and that meant on certain days, the exchange would be close to R$600 for 1000 Yuan. My youngest kept hers for a planned visit to her fifth grandaunt on my husband side, of course she would keep one meal that she would have with my uncle and family. After she handed in her Master's dissertation, she deliberately made up days in her part-time employment to allow herself a short visit to Kwangchow. I declined going on dietary grounds. My husband went with her and they had a wonderful time with the grandaunt's family. Matriarch Ho, eldest son, eldest daughter-in-law, eldest grandson and great-grandson. Unfortunately, the timing was such that while they were in China, the eldest grandson was in hospital because of an occupational eye-strain. Even the eldest grandson's brother -in-law who was waiting for results was pressed into night duty looking after the critically-ill young man who needed complete quiet bed rest.
Even though my youngest was "banana" through and through, her smattering of "Mandarin", gestures and mimes got her through the 5-day visit. They laughed and laughed over the language gaps. It sounded like a really fun visit. My daughter is a person with charisma and she received favours everywhere she went. Her grandaunt enjoyed her piano playing so much in her second trip that she was invited to visit again. During her third visit it was the eldest son and daughter-in-law who invited her to visit again and they said make it a longer visit so they could take her to more places of interest.
This is 2020. Sometime right before Chinese New Year, I was mooting about taking some savings to send my youngest and my mum back for a 4-day trip to Kwangchow. I was planning on business class tickets and 3 nights in a 3-star hotel close to my cousin's condo. Alas! Corona virus struck. I kept quiet about the outlandish idea. Only my eldest heard about it way before the lock down in Wuhan. He warned me that such a pandemic would make a social visit impossible for 2 to 3 years. Which by then it would be too late for my mum to fly, she is already 88 this year. Anyway, it was a wonderful brain wave while the idea lasted.
(1225) clothes for attending graduations
The year I graduated from college, my mother was 51 years old.
It is interesting that I am far older now than she was then. Things often look different further down the road in life. Age and experience do change a person's perspectives. Had my mum and dad been able to come for my graduation, I would have been overjoyed and delighted at their presence. Had I been ethnic Indian, my mum would have come with her best sari. Were I Malay, it would have been ornate baju kurung. Since we are Chinese descent, the formal attire for her would be cheongsam, also called qipao.
Looking back, my mum-in-law went on repeated shopping sprees to buy western co-ordinated blouse and skirt sets in solid pastel colours for her daughter's graduation in Boston. Of course the choice of attire for an important occasion is a personal one. I, however, like to think of the reason I was given scholarship and financial aid to attend an exclusive liberal arts college is to add diversity to a homogenously white student body. I would imagine what my mum and dad would choose to put on for a landmark occasion like graduation would be somewhat educational to most American youth.
When my youngest child graduated, I actually wore a nice blouse and pants - which was what I normally wore for that period of my life. A few years after that I lost like 35 pounds due to an illness, for close to a year I wore skirts with rubberised tops. After gaining back 15 pounds or so, it was not so difficult to acquire fitting clothes. All the sizes 5, 6, and 7 were given away at the recycling centre. It is a wonderful blessing to be able to fit into a size M, quite easy to shop for clothes in most places.
It is interesting that I am far older now than she was then. Things often look different further down the road in life. Age and experience do change a person's perspectives. Had my mum and dad been able to come for my graduation, I would have been overjoyed and delighted at their presence. Had I been ethnic Indian, my mum would have come with her best sari. Were I Malay, it would have been ornate baju kurung. Since we are Chinese descent, the formal attire for her would be cheongsam, also called qipao.
Looking back, my mum-in-law went on repeated shopping sprees to buy western co-ordinated blouse and skirt sets in solid pastel colours for her daughter's graduation in Boston. Of course the choice of attire for an important occasion is a personal one. I, however, like to think of the reason I was given scholarship and financial aid to attend an exclusive liberal arts college is to add diversity to a homogenously white student body. I would imagine what my mum and dad would choose to put on for a landmark occasion like graduation would be somewhat educational to most American youth.
When my youngest child graduated, I actually wore a nice blouse and pants - which was what I normally wore for that period of my life. A few years after that I lost like 35 pounds due to an illness, for close to a year I wore skirts with rubberised tops. After gaining back 15 pounds or so, it was not so difficult to acquire fitting clothes. All the sizes 5, 6, and 7 were given away at the recycling centre. It is a wonderful blessing to be able to fit into a size M, quite easy to shop for clothes in most places.
(1224)The lot of a chief tenant
It was a long time ago that thirteen female shared a medium-size fridge in a Senior's dormitory in Virginia.
I occupied a room on the top floor that faced the stairway. To avoid any petty conflicts, I normally kept any food in my room in sealed bags. Things that required chilling would be kept on the outer ledge of the wide window. Old buildings tend to have very long and wide ledges. Temperatures in late winter and early spring were as cool as the fridge anyway. Whenever the maid screamed and yelled, I was definitely not the source of her ire. You can bet that whatever teenage to working age girls do with the fridge which won't meet with the approval of their mothers. So I often ended up listening and sympathizing with the help.
Now it is almost as if I have travelled in the time machine. It is my friend bemoaning the antics of her six subtenants. This time I am roughly the age of that maid in 1983. After having housed a few young girls, I see things with a less rigid standard. Of course I am not saying the careless, thoughtless, and often a little self-centred girls are right. Mind you, these are girls in their mid-twenties. And some of them actually cook breakfasts and dinners daily. Whatever the reasons are, whether it is the purse or the waist-line, they took the trouble to cook for one individually. Whatever the misdemeanour, I see it as either you resolve it the soonest or choose to let it go. There is not much point to be irritated and fume over it, it simply is not worth letting such a little thing spoiling the day. Most people would grouse. So it is to be expected that any visitor would get an earful of complaints. Thank goodness I am not a landlady or a chief tenant.
I occupied a room on the top floor that faced the stairway. To avoid any petty conflicts, I normally kept any food in my room in sealed bags. Things that required chilling would be kept on the outer ledge of the wide window. Old buildings tend to have very long and wide ledges. Temperatures in late winter and early spring were as cool as the fridge anyway. Whenever the maid screamed and yelled, I was definitely not the source of her ire. You can bet that whatever teenage to working age girls do with the fridge which won't meet with the approval of their mothers. So I often ended up listening and sympathizing with the help.
Now it is almost as if I have travelled in the time machine. It is my friend bemoaning the antics of her six subtenants. This time I am roughly the age of that maid in 1983. After having housed a few young girls, I see things with a less rigid standard. Of course I am not saying the careless, thoughtless, and often a little self-centred girls are right. Mind you, these are girls in their mid-twenties. And some of them actually cook breakfasts and dinners daily. Whatever the reasons are, whether it is the purse or the waist-line, they took the trouble to cook for one individually. Whatever the misdemeanour, I see it as either you resolve it the soonest or choose to let it go. There is not much point to be irritated and fume over it, it simply is not worth letting such a little thing spoiling the day. Most people would grouse. So it is to be expected that any visitor would get an earful of complaints. Thank goodness I am not a landlady or a chief tenant.
(1223)Financial reputation
Young girls who first come out to work renting rooms know little about building good financial reputations.
I see an example when I sat down with an experienced chief tenant who have had tenants for five years. A girl who has flawless complexion, much above average looks, dresses sassily may be late most months in paying rent. I guess all that expensive make-up, skin care and costly clothes make balancing the monthly budget difficult. That was until the day the chief tenant related how she had an unbeatable record of paying rent at least a few days before it is due. All the neighbours knew about her prompt payments. At least three other houses within hailing distance have been offered to her at matching amount. She then went on to tell her pretty tenant that beauty is important to a young woman, but a good reputation is important too. People tend to talk, not only the inmates of one house, but if one person stays more than a few months, her reputation might travel. Neighbours would match face to car, perhaps voice with occupation. The world can be a very small place. It is therefore smart to build a flawless financial reputation from day one.
After this chatty lecture, the pretty one reformed and pays on time monthly. Once she even surprised her chief by paying a few days early. Now I can see why my eldest became the favourite tenant of his landlord. Within his slim means he habitually pays his rent a week ahead, summer and winter. No wonder soups came weekly, extra food of all kinds travelled from the landlord's bountiful kitchen often. I am fortunate to enjoy this favour when I visit.
I see an example when I sat down with an experienced chief tenant who have had tenants for five years. A girl who has flawless complexion, much above average looks, dresses sassily may be late most months in paying rent. I guess all that expensive make-up, skin care and costly clothes make balancing the monthly budget difficult. That was until the day the chief tenant related how she had an unbeatable record of paying rent at least a few days before it is due. All the neighbours knew about her prompt payments. At least three other houses within hailing distance have been offered to her at matching amount. She then went on to tell her pretty tenant that beauty is important to a young woman, but a good reputation is important too. People tend to talk, not only the inmates of one house, but if one person stays more than a few months, her reputation might travel. Neighbours would match face to car, perhaps voice with occupation. The world can be a very small place. It is therefore smart to build a flawless financial reputation from day one.
After this chatty lecture, the pretty one reformed and pays on time monthly. Once she even surprised her chief by paying a few days early. Now I can see why my eldest became the favourite tenant of his landlord. Within his slim means he habitually pays his rent a week ahead, summer and winter. No wonder soups came weekly, extra food of all kinds travelled from the landlord's bountiful kitchen often. I am fortunate to enjoy this favour when I visit.
(1222) Renting a room
I am visiting an old friend who runs a rooming house for six girls. It is interesting to see the interactions among the inmates as well as the relationship of each tenant with the chief tenant.
One would imagine that students or working girls would group together and rent an apartment. Not true for this house. Each girl independently found the house, stay happily until it is time to move on. Although they are happy to make this gracious location their domicile, they would not recommend their friend in, not even when friends are interested and there is a room about to be vacant. With two months deposit, the chief tenant has at least two months' notice before anyone moved out. Any other scenario would lead to forfeiture of deposit, month for month in hard cash!
My friend's theory is that friends of most kinds could not withstand the daily grind. She thinks it is smarter for most girls to live apart from every one of their friends and live with virtual strangers. Perhaps that is generally true. But, I do have an exception to the rule. My mother lives next door to a house owned by three people: husband, his wife and the wife's best friend. Lately the middle age husband who is a citizen of Australia works out of town. We seldom see the wife, she probably relocated periodically to be with him. The other female part owner retired from school teaching but still keeps herself busy with other jobs. Previously the building was used as a counselling house run by three women: the two joint owners and one other from their church. With the current situation, my mum hardly sees the third woman.
Now and then as I visit I would notice all three of them going out in one car for most of the day, possibly running or attending a seminar on counselling.
One would imagine that students or working girls would group together and rent an apartment. Not true for this house. Each girl independently found the house, stay happily until it is time to move on. Although they are happy to make this gracious location their domicile, they would not recommend their friend in, not even when friends are interested and there is a room about to be vacant. With two months deposit, the chief tenant has at least two months' notice before anyone moved out. Any other scenario would lead to forfeiture of deposit, month for month in hard cash!
My friend's theory is that friends of most kinds could not withstand the daily grind. She thinks it is smarter for most girls to live apart from every one of their friends and live with virtual strangers. Perhaps that is generally true. But, I do have an exception to the rule. My mother lives next door to a house owned by three people: husband, his wife and the wife's best friend. Lately the middle age husband who is a citizen of Australia works out of town. We seldom see the wife, she probably relocated periodically to be with him. The other female part owner retired from school teaching but still keeps herself busy with other jobs. Previously the building was used as a counselling house run by three women: the two joint owners and one other from their church. With the current situation, my mum hardly sees the third woman.
Now and then as I visit I would notice all three of them going out in one car for most of the day, possibly running or attending a seminar on counselling.
(1221) Campus life
I was sitting in the kitchen cutting papaya. It is wonderful to stay in a place that is within walking distance to a wet market.
Seow came in, collecting boiled cooled water for her trip to Universiti Malaya for an one hour lecture. I mused that my youngest spent 5 years of her college life there. She loved that campus. Had she the opportunity, she won't mind living on campus for the rest of her mortal life. But the catch is she didn't want to continue onto a PhD, academic career is out. Still, if she could find a job as a dormitory warden, she could work and live on campus. No, she said the fact that the warden's apartment was built to accommodate a good size family preclude that. Those slots were hard to get. Usually way before a family moved on, many others would vie for the post.
Seow was a little taken aback. I guess she just saw the campus as any collection of buildings of learning. Now that she is in her last semester, any learning period is less hectic than a working life. She had a tough time during her internship previously. As a modern educated female, working is inevitable unless she chose to marry a man of substance and decide to stay at home. That too brings along its own set of challenges.
Seow came in, collecting boiled cooled water for her trip to Universiti Malaya for an one hour lecture. I mused that my youngest spent 5 years of her college life there. She loved that campus. Had she the opportunity, she won't mind living on campus for the rest of her mortal life. But the catch is she didn't want to continue onto a PhD, academic career is out. Still, if she could find a job as a dormitory warden, she could work and live on campus. No, she said the fact that the warden's apartment was built to accommodate a good size family preclude that. Those slots were hard to get. Usually way before a family moved on, many others would vie for the post.
Seow was a little taken aback. I guess she just saw the campus as any collection of buildings of learning. Now that she is in her last semester, any learning period is less hectic than a working life. She had a tough time during her internship previously. As a modern educated female, working is inevitable unless she chose to marry a man of substance and decide to stay at home. That too brings along its own set of challenges.
(1220) The road less travelled
The Road less travelled
I count on my fingers:
1. my friend from Thailand in a Petaling Jaya church
2. a lady from a small church with 4 children
3. a friend who moved out of the neighbourhood
4. a newly met friend who is retired and going back to her home country
1 is still suffering the after effects of divorce and missing her two grown children living in her husband's country. 2 - I see her swollen wrist valiantly painting her gate, although her husband offered to pay a man to do it. 3 - her swollen wrists after months of gardening and all kinds of DIY projects to beautify a rented house. 4 - her uphill and windy roads after a perfect youth - able to travel the world with more than enough pay and wonderful benefits that come with the job (being an ex-pat).
These are professing Christians and I could see much suffering. They each carry their respective cross. Is suffering and pain the only way to learning to hear God and obey him? Is human nature such that under normal circumstances few would need God?
Yet I see another group of people:
a. My millionaire well educated former classmate that chose western Buddhism
b. An elder cousin who seemed so self-sufficient and does not need God whom he is angry with
c. A neighbour who enshrines travelling and house cleaning after retirement
d. A cousin who is happily saving every penny. But as long as her mom with dementia is alive, she could not travel at all.
I would not say that the second group is any happier than the first group. Nor could I conclude that the second group suffers from nothing. Perhaps life is what one makes it of.
I count on my fingers:
1. my friend from Thailand in a Petaling Jaya church
2. a lady from a small church with 4 children
3. a friend who moved out of the neighbourhood
4. a newly met friend who is retired and going back to her home country
1 is still suffering the after effects of divorce and missing her two grown children living in her husband's country. 2 - I see her swollen wrist valiantly painting her gate, although her husband offered to pay a man to do it. 3 - her swollen wrists after months of gardening and all kinds of DIY projects to beautify a rented house. 4 - her uphill and windy roads after a perfect youth - able to travel the world with more than enough pay and wonderful benefits that come with the job (being an ex-pat).
These are professing Christians and I could see much suffering. They each carry their respective cross. Is suffering and pain the only way to learning to hear God and obey him? Is human nature such that under normal circumstances few would need God?
Yet I see another group of people:
a. My millionaire well educated former classmate that chose western Buddhism
b. An elder cousin who seemed so self-sufficient and does not need God whom he is angry with
c. A neighbour who enshrines travelling and house cleaning after retirement
d. A cousin who is happily saving every penny. But as long as her mom with dementia is alive, she could not travel at all.
I would not say that the second group is any happier than the first group. Nor could I conclude that the second group suffers from nothing. Perhaps life is what one makes it of.
(1219) landlord-tenant relationship
I was visiting at a friend's when I met her downstairs tenant. We'll call the landlady Betty and the tenant Cathy. Cathy looks like a physically rather short cover girl. She is well groomed. She rushed into the kitchen while I was almost done cooking my simple meal.
During our leisurely lunch, Betty related her year-long relationship with Cathy. Apparently Cathy rented the room fresh out of college and sweet-talked Betty into giving her an extra month's grace in complying with the 2-month deposit and one month advance rule. She was given a special concession to move in after paying one month deposit and one month advance. By the end of the first month in house, she paid 2 months' rental to make up for the late deposit. Perhaps that was the circumstance that led to a later conflict.
Being new at work, she was bullied by her boss. One day Cathy found herself jobless as she was wrongfully dismissed. Betty, being older and more knowledgeable, wrote a letter like a lawyer that managed to have Cathy reinstated. Cathy worked long enough to get her rightful month's pay but left anyway. She whiled away her free month before reporting for work at a new job. It was around Chinese New Year, she left the rented room and spent three weeks at home with her parents in another state. A simple whatsap message requesting permission to pay the February rent slowly over the following few months. After all, Betty wasn't born yesterday. She shot back a long message giving many reasons why Cathy could not be allowed to do that. She mercifully gave Cathy 5 days' grace to pay up. The amount was banked into the correct account within 4 days.
After all, a landlord-tenant relationship is financial and contractual. One can be kind but it is madness to be knowingly taken advantage of. And it is just so easy to be kind once and the other party not only take it for granted but expect further leniency.
During our leisurely lunch, Betty related her year-long relationship with Cathy. Apparently Cathy rented the room fresh out of college and sweet-talked Betty into giving her an extra month's grace in complying with the 2-month deposit and one month advance rule. She was given a special concession to move in after paying one month deposit and one month advance. By the end of the first month in house, she paid 2 months' rental to make up for the late deposit. Perhaps that was the circumstance that led to a later conflict.
Being new at work, she was bullied by her boss. One day Cathy found herself jobless as she was wrongfully dismissed. Betty, being older and more knowledgeable, wrote a letter like a lawyer that managed to have Cathy reinstated. Cathy worked long enough to get her rightful month's pay but left anyway. She whiled away her free month before reporting for work at a new job. It was around Chinese New Year, she left the rented room and spent three weeks at home with her parents in another state. A simple whatsap message requesting permission to pay the February rent slowly over the following few months. After all, Betty wasn't born yesterday. She shot back a long message giving many reasons why Cathy could not be allowed to do that. She mercifully gave Cathy 5 days' grace to pay up. The amount was banked into the correct account within 4 days.
After all, a landlord-tenant relationship is financial and contractual. One can be kind but it is madness to be knowingly taken advantage of. And it is just so easy to be kind once and the other party not only take it for granted but expect further leniency.
(1218) three dates soup
A phone call came to me while I was travelling between Perak and Perlis. My daughter asked me the recipe for making 3 dates soup for an anaemic patient.
Many years ago I visited Amy during her confinement period for her second child. She had her first child's first month in her mother's home. After that it was agreed among the in-laws to rotate to her mother-in-law's home. However, while she was carrying the second child, her unmarried brother-in-law passed away. Since a happy event would clashes with a tragedy, she opted to hire a confinement lady to help her the lunar month subsequent to the second birth.
Her confinement lady boiled a most palatable 3 dates soup for her to consume throughout the 28 days. As one of the few who were admitted to see the mother and new born within that month, I was given the same drink made for the convalescing mother. There were three dates used: red, black and blue dates. I have forgotten her exact ratio, after all it was 33 years ago. However I vaguely recalled it was in proportion to the taste and value in money spent purchasing those different dates. It could have been 4:2:1, red dates are the cheapest by weight and the sweetest; it was followed by black dates and then the rare blue dates which would be the most pricey.
Depending on the means of cooking, by gas it was to bring it to a rapid boil, simmer for one and a half hours. If one was to use charcoal, it would be on medium heat until the volume of water halved. Using a slow cooker, one switched from high at a rolling boil to slow or simmer for two hours. Since the instruction was given a third of a decade ago, no one in the country then had induction electrical cooking yet. Any reader keen to try this recipe would have to improvise.
My daughter took down the instructions and accordingly boiled the first batch for her friend who was discharged from the hospital. The patient was being treated for leukaemia. We'll see how the patient fared a few weeks later.
** The blog was hand written three weeks ago. Finally I got to a place I have internet to post this. Am happy to report the "patient" found enough energy to plant a plot of 4 vegetables 10x40 feet in front of her house in Pahang.
Many years ago I visited Amy during her confinement period for her second child. She had her first child's first month in her mother's home. After that it was agreed among the in-laws to rotate to her mother-in-law's home. However, while she was carrying the second child, her unmarried brother-in-law passed away. Since a happy event would clashes with a tragedy, she opted to hire a confinement lady to help her the lunar month subsequent to the second birth.
Her confinement lady boiled a most palatable 3 dates soup for her to consume throughout the 28 days. As one of the few who were admitted to see the mother and new born within that month, I was given the same drink made for the convalescing mother. There were three dates used: red, black and blue dates. I have forgotten her exact ratio, after all it was 33 years ago. However I vaguely recalled it was in proportion to the taste and value in money spent purchasing those different dates. It could have been 4:2:1, red dates are the cheapest by weight and the sweetest; it was followed by black dates and then the rare blue dates which would be the most pricey.
Depending on the means of cooking, by gas it was to bring it to a rapid boil, simmer for one and a half hours. If one was to use charcoal, it would be on medium heat until the volume of water halved. Using a slow cooker, one switched from high at a rolling boil to slow or simmer for two hours. Since the instruction was given a third of a decade ago, no one in the country then had induction electrical cooking yet. Any reader keen to try this recipe would have to improvise.
My daughter took down the instructions and accordingly boiled the first batch for her friend who was discharged from the hospital. The patient was being treated for leukaemia. We'll see how the patient fared a few weeks later.
** The blog was hand written three weeks ago. Finally I got to a place I have internet to post this. Am happy to report the "patient" found enough energy to plant a plot of 4 vegetables 10x40 feet in front of her house in Pahang.
Monday, February 3, 2020
(1216) A blind cat
There is a blind white cat that begs at my table whenever I eat at the Malay place.
It is a strong male. Its pale blue eyes were seldom open whenever it was seated near my chair legs. I suspect it is at least partially blind. It compensates the lack of keen sight with an acute sense of smell. Without looking at our plates, it knows which of us has fish on the plate. Accordingly, it is right beside the person with fish meat to spare.
Yesterday I did not sit in my usual place. It was about to rain. I chose a corner seat under the wide awning. The white cat walked along the side where our usual table was and right across the front of the shop. It did not spot me. Anyway at that point the fish dish was just being cooked. I chose to keep quiet.
Sure enough, half an hour later it came back. I called it and it walked right up to where I was to claim my fish stomach pieces. It was the cat's lucky day since the fish was not cooked in a spicy sauce. It is interesting that given enough time, an animal in a familiar territory is able to learn enough to survive even if it is slowly losing its sight. It probably recognises me by placement and sound. Should I sit in an unfamiliar seat alone and kept quiet, it would walk right past me without recognition. With a unique voice signature, it remembers me as a friendly food provider.
It is a strong male. Its pale blue eyes were seldom open whenever it was seated near my chair legs. I suspect it is at least partially blind. It compensates the lack of keen sight with an acute sense of smell. Without looking at our plates, it knows which of us has fish on the plate. Accordingly, it is right beside the person with fish meat to spare.
Yesterday I did not sit in my usual place. It was about to rain. I chose a corner seat under the wide awning. The white cat walked along the side where our usual table was and right across the front of the shop. It did not spot me. Anyway at that point the fish dish was just being cooked. I chose to keep quiet.
Sure enough, half an hour later it came back. I called it and it walked right up to where I was to claim my fish stomach pieces. It was the cat's lucky day since the fish was not cooked in a spicy sauce. It is interesting that given enough time, an animal in a familiar territory is able to learn enough to survive even if it is slowly losing its sight. It probably recognises me by placement and sound. Should I sit in an unfamiliar seat alone and kept quiet, it would walk right past me without recognition. With a unique voice signature, it remembers me as a friendly food provider.
Monday, January 27, 2020
(1215) Learning to drive
My landlady has an only child. The girl is going to be 17 when she hits her birthday this year. She wasn't planning to learn to drive. Why? Because mum and dad said she has to dig money out of her saving account to learn driving. Not only that, she suspected she would become the official driver for her parents. Should she get into any accidents, points will be deducted from her license.
Since my son and I listened to her attentively and respected her view, she in turn listened to our view. We told her that learner's cost goes up every year, in 2004 it cost $750, by 2008 it was $850. Now it may cost $1050 or more.
Then we explained that it is very common that a young person passed his or her driving test and then leave the home town to study pre-university in another city. Unless dad coughed out $15,000 or so for a second hand car, most students do not drive. Once the two years are up, a "p" license will convert to a normal license.
She could see our points are valid. But of course it is her choice when she decides to learn to drive.
Since my son and I listened to her attentively and respected her view, she in turn listened to our view. We told her that learner's cost goes up every year, in 2004 it cost $750, by 2008 it was $850. Now it may cost $1050 or more.
Then we explained that it is very common that a young person passed his or her driving test and then leave the home town to study pre-university in another city. Unless dad coughed out $15,000 or so for a second hand car, most students do not drive. Once the two years are up, a "p" license will convert to a normal license.
She could see our points are valid. But of course it is her choice when she decides to learn to drive.
(1214) Child Labour
Today is the third day in Chinese New Year. There was an all girls troupe of lion dancers performing in the Giant Supermarket. I heard that the Giant chain of supermarkets in Sabah was being taken over by a group from Labuan. Already Giant in Tawau was in new hands with new name.
After lunch we were outside of Kentucky Fried Chicken. The door to KFC kitchen was open. Three boys were collecting paper recyclables in black bags on trolley to a small lorry outside. A boy that looked like 11 years old was wheeling the trolley. Another smaller boy that could be 7 or so was loading the trolley. A third one that could be 14 was standing up in the loading area to pack the bags tightly.
My son said that these boys probably came from the interior and were too poor to go to school. Their parents may have too many children to feed that they were farmed out to relatives near the city. The relatives found individuals who would feed, house, train the boys to a legitimate line of work. Near my place there is a restaurant that sells economic noodles for breakfast and economic mix rice for lunch. The lady boss is a fair, even-temper individual who trained her servers from young, maybe 12 to 14. As far as I could see, she had been having the same three servers (2 boys and 1 older girl) for the past 5 years and now there is a 13 year old new additional girl.
Well, certainly these boys will have a better future than the five glue sniffers who sleep rough in front of the shops. Being employed bodes well, they could advance to better jobs as time goes on. It is better than the undocumented children that hang around the dumb site. It is sad that the very state that produced the most resources happened to be the second poorest in my country. I certainly do not see Malaysian citizens being deprived of education in the Peninsular. But here, things are very different.
After lunch we were outside of Kentucky Fried Chicken. The door to KFC kitchen was open. Three boys were collecting paper recyclables in black bags on trolley to a small lorry outside. A boy that looked like 11 years old was wheeling the trolley. Another smaller boy that could be 7 or so was loading the trolley. A third one that could be 14 was standing up in the loading area to pack the bags tightly.
My son said that these boys probably came from the interior and were too poor to go to school. Their parents may have too many children to feed that they were farmed out to relatives near the city. The relatives found individuals who would feed, house, train the boys to a legitimate line of work. Near my place there is a restaurant that sells economic noodles for breakfast and economic mix rice for lunch. The lady boss is a fair, even-temper individual who trained her servers from young, maybe 12 to 14. As far as I could see, she had been having the same three servers (2 boys and 1 older girl) for the past 5 years and now there is a 13 year old new additional girl.
Well, certainly these boys will have a better future than the five glue sniffers who sleep rough in front of the shops. Being employed bodes well, they could advance to better jobs as time goes on. It is better than the undocumented children that hang around the dumb site. It is sad that the very state that produced the most resources happened to be the second poorest in my country. I certainly do not see Malaysian citizens being deprived of education in the Peninsular. But here, things are very different.
(1213) The Cost of Writing
It is interesting that the threat of death took away all my fears. In surviving, after spending much in medical cost, I need an alternate source of income. I am very blessed that my husband is my publisher. My eldest child is my editor and my youngest child is my proof-reader. Something like a family enterprise. Now that I am a published author, the next logical step is to give talks.
Now, if you are thinking of writing and publishing books, there are habits you have to pick up:
1. writing daily
2. my writing professor gave me the advice of reading good books, she separated her thumb and her index finger to be 2-3 inches apart and said keep reading weekly.
3. open your mind to life long learning - you must keep picking up new facts, new thoughts and new things to write about.
4. join a public library nearby and visit it fortnightly
5. love languages, be intoxicated with words, be accepting to new ideas
6. surround yourself with word smiths: language teachers, reporters, lawyers, writers, editors, people in advertising, people in public relations, bloggers,...
7. develop perseverance. If you want to be picked by a publishing house, you have to be able handle rejections, possibly years of it. Real gold is refined by fire. Real talents would last and perhaps win out ultimately against adversity.
Now, if you are thinking of writing and publishing books, there are habits you have to pick up:
1. writing daily
2. my writing professor gave me the advice of reading good books, she separated her thumb and her index finger to be 2-3 inches apart and said keep reading weekly.
3. open your mind to life long learning - you must keep picking up new facts, new thoughts and new things to write about.
4. join a public library nearby and visit it fortnightly
5. love languages, be intoxicated with words, be accepting to new ideas
6. surround yourself with word smiths: language teachers, reporters, lawyers, writers, editors, people in advertising, people in public relations, bloggers,...
7. develop perseverance. If you want to be picked by a publishing house, you have to be able handle rejections, possibly years of it. Real gold is refined by fire. Real talents would last and perhaps win out ultimately against adversity.
(1212) A Lifetime of writing
If I had accepted the high school- college scholarship, I definitely would not be here today. I would be exclusively Mandarin speaking. At age 13 when I joined a Malay school, I could not speak English, neither could I speak Malay. It was very difficult to overcome the language barrier.
I came from a poor family, at a very young age I was enterprising enough to sell articles to Chinese newspapers and magazines. At first I was paid in stamps, which I would use to write to pen friends outside of Malaysia. Later as the articles became longer, postal orders were used. The most I was paid for a single story was to Reader's Digest All in A Day's Work at US$30, it was a joke with a 63 word count.
Eight years after my first offer, I did accept an offer to study in Virginia, USA. It was not for writing. I was selected for being good in all three branches of Science and Mathematics. Of course being able to write well helped tremendously in the selection essays or statement of purpose.
In the university, I had to fulfil requirements. In year two I took a second level writing course and chose to write a term paper on my maternal grandma's biography. In year three I could not find anything I like and ended up with an independent study writing Chinese folk tales with my writing instructor. My instructor happened to be a professional copy-editor, she was surprised that as a foreign student I could produce work on par with publishable manuscript. She made me promise I would hold on to the eight folk tales and not throw them away. I actually brought it back from Texas both in diskette and in printed forms.
Thirty six years passed by. I still write almost daily, in my journals, letters, notes, e-mails, ... Then when my children showed me what a nifty way it is to store things on line, I started blogging. In no time was I convinced to publish my work. I didn't need money as my needs are few. I am fearful of being known. It is very easy to be totally anonymous. I have little ambition, and I no longer wanted to be rich. I have seen how my friends and classmates become rich and turned into people I could hardly recognise. And I dare not say that wealth would not change me to be a lesser person. And so I muddle on, year after year.
Then I was sick and came close to dying. I told my children I have stored on line 7 and 1/2 books. I offered to write down instructions on how to get them ready for publishing. They dared not take on the responsibility to publish posthumously. It was a mental choice to fight to live. By God's mercy, I won the battle and live to publish 3 books. The first was Stories My Grandma Told me. The second was Animal Stories and the third was a Chinese translation of book one plus an article left by my dad: The Stories of Four Generations. The fourth one is in the pipeline: it will be a collection of picture devotional articles, title to be determined.
I came from a poor family, at a very young age I was enterprising enough to sell articles to Chinese newspapers and magazines. At first I was paid in stamps, which I would use to write to pen friends outside of Malaysia. Later as the articles became longer, postal orders were used. The most I was paid for a single story was to Reader's Digest All in A Day's Work at US$30, it was a joke with a 63 word count.
Eight years after my first offer, I did accept an offer to study in Virginia, USA. It was not for writing. I was selected for being good in all three branches of Science and Mathematics. Of course being able to write well helped tremendously in the selection essays or statement of purpose.
In the university, I had to fulfil requirements. In year two I took a second level writing course and chose to write a term paper on my maternal grandma's biography. In year three I could not find anything I like and ended up with an independent study writing Chinese folk tales with my writing instructor. My instructor happened to be a professional copy-editor, she was surprised that as a foreign student I could produce work on par with publishable manuscript. She made me promise I would hold on to the eight folk tales and not throw them away. I actually brought it back from Texas both in diskette and in printed forms.
Thirty six years passed by. I still write almost daily, in my journals, letters, notes, e-mails, ... Then when my children showed me what a nifty way it is to store things on line, I started blogging. In no time was I convinced to publish my work. I didn't need money as my needs are few. I am fearful of being known. It is very easy to be totally anonymous. I have little ambition, and I no longer wanted to be rich. I have seen how my friends and classmates become rich and turned into people I could hardly recognise. And I dare not say that wealth would not change me to be a lesser person. And so I muddle on, year after year.
Then I was sick and came close to dying. I told my children I have stored on line 7 and 1/2 books. I offered to write down instructions on how to get them ready for publishing. They dared not take on the responsibility to publish posthumously. It was a mental choice to fight to live. By God's mercy, I won the battle and live to publish 3 books. The first was Stories My Grandma Told me. The second was Animal Stories and the third was a Chinese translation of book one plus an article left by my dad: The Stories of Four Generations. The fourth one is in the pipeline: it will be a collection of picture devotional articles, title to be determined.
(1211) The act of writing
There are three groups of people.
1. Those who write naturally
2. Those who write with great difficulties
3. Those who work really hard to write well
It is easy for group 1 to become writers.
It is inevitable that 99% of group 2 do not write daily for enjoyment.
I can think of two individuals from group 3: a form mate of mine became a staff writer in the main English newspaper. She was in my class at age 13. Later I joined the science stream but she chose the arts stream.
My youngest daughter's bus mate who became a cub reporter for a weekend newspaper in Silver City.
From the time I was nine years old I was aware that I enjoyed writing and could produce work that was passed around among the Chinese language teachers in the staff room. Most of the time I was embarrassed because I did not work hard and didn't really deserve to be praised.
At age 12 the headmistress offered me a private scholarship to a private Chinese High School. She promised me that should I continue to write well, the scholarship would extend to a journalism degree in Taiwan. The sponsors were a group of wealthy women who would like to see a female become the executive editor of a Chinese national daily.
I kept quiet about the offer because I knew that my mum and dad would force me to accept it. They both feel that I should confine my natural talents to serve the Chinese language, culture and community.
Being stubborn, I went to a Malay school and pursue my dream of becoming good in English. Looking back, it was a mulish habit to fight a disability. It would have been very natural and easy to pursue what I was born to excel in and become a specialist in that field.
That was not to be.
1. Those who write naturally
2. Those who write with great difficulties
3. Those who work really hard to write well
It is easy for group 1 to become writers.
It is inevitable that 99% of group 2 do not write daily for enjoyment.
I can think of two individuals from group 3: a form mate of mine became a staff writer in the main English newspaper. She was in my class at age 13. Later I joined the science stream but she chose the arts stream.
My youngest daughter's bus mate who became a cub reporter for a weekend newspaper in Silver City.
From the time I was nine years old I was aware that I enjoyed writing and could produce work that was passed around among the Chinese language teachers in the staff room. Most of the time I was embarrassed because I did not work hard and didn't really deserve to be praised.
At age 12 the headmistress offered me a private scholarship to a private Chinese High School. She promised me that should I continue to write well, the scholarship would extend to a journalism degree in Taiwan. The sponsors were a group of wealthy women who would like to see a female become the executive editor of a Chinese national daily.
I kept quiet about the offer because I knew that my mum and dad would force me to accept it. They both feel that I should confine my natural talents to serve the Chinese language, culture and community.
Being stubborn, I went to a Malay school and pursue my dream of becoming good in English. Looking back, it was a mulish habit to fight a disability. It would have been very natural and easy to pursue what I was born to excel in and become a specialist in that field.
That was not to be.
Thursday, January 23, 2020
(1211) smash the hand phone
The smart phone is a versatile instrument that most people could not live without.
More than ten years ago I was staying in a rental semi-detached on a road called Desa Mansion. It was an old housing estate very near to the city in a tin mining town. The average number of people staying in those big houses is four. Many such houses were occupied by the old folks whose children have flown the coup.
Opposite my house lived a young couple with one son and one maid in renovated splendour. There were four huge rooms upstairs and one spacious room downstairs. The young mistress was a beautiful woman. She owns her retreat house a few miles away. Whenever she had a tiff with her indulgent husband, she would disappear for a few weeks before being "courted" by her husband to return.
One day he must have laid down some unacceptable rules, she threw her new hand phone (purchased and given by her husband) onto his new car's windscreen. I happened to be weeding in my front garden and heard the crash. Soon a group of old ladies and maids gathered in front of my gate to look at the shattered windscreen.
If you have been following this blog lately, you would know a 13 year old boy who alternated between mom's and dad's abodes. He was given I-pad and I-phone when he was 7 years old. Both gadgets were abruptly withdrawn one November, he was angry enough to throw his phone at the wide screen TV. As a consequence of the action, he was denied a vacation in his father's town.
Here I note that the action of a child was not very different from that of a 35 year old woman who was a successful car salesperson.
More than ten years ago I was staying in a rental semi-detached on a road called Desa Mansion. It was an old housing estate very near to the city in a tin mining town. The average number of people staying in those big houses is four. Many such houses were occupied by the old folks whose children have flown the coup.
Opposite my house lived a young couple with one son and one maid in renovated splendour. There were four huge rooms upstairs and one spacious room downstairs. The young mistress was a beautiful woman. She owns her retreat house a few miles away. Whenever she had a tiff with her indulgent husband, she would disappear for a few weeks before being "courted" by her husband to return.
One day he must have laid down some unacceptable rules, she threw her new hand phone (purchased and given by her husband) onto his new car's windscreen. I happened to be weeding in my front garden and heard the crash. Soon a group of old ladies and maids gathered in front of my gate to look at the shattered windscreen.
If you have been following this blog lately, you would know a 13 year old boy who alternated between mom's and dad's abodes. He was given I-pad and I-phone when he was 7 years old. Both gadgets were abruptly withdrawn one November, he was angry enough to throw his phone at the wide screen TV. As a consequence of the action, he was denied a vacation in his father's town.
Here I note that the action of a child was not very different from that of a 35 year old woman who was a successful car salesperson.
(1210) Swear words
Swearing is like smoking. One can easily pick it up from family members and people around either at home or in school.
I had a Chemistry professor who said "sugar!" whenever she got flustered or upset. Most people would utter "sh*t" in undertone. My lab buddy, however, chose to say "shark!" whenever her experiments were going to pieces. We were doing organic chemistry experiments that were long, complicated and it was often tedious to get satisfactory result.
Here in a corner of Borneo, Chinese school boys say "Da bien" (sh*t) in abandon. I hear it in bus stops, shops near secondary schools. Interestingly, my son claimed that some of them limit such swear words to outside of the parental orbit. There is a tuition centre in my housing estate. Children were utilising hand phone to call for rides, often they play games and talk to their friends too. The few times I walked past, conversations were peppered with very colourful language, either in Mandarin or Cantonese.
Just a few days ago, I was commenting about English pronunciation, accent, and ability to persuade. One of the students in my son's tutoring group is 13 years old. He evidently has the gift of the gab. Without trying too hard, he could be witty and sarcastic. I said in passing that if he could improve his Bahasa (the national language, used in the courts), he would make a good lawyer. He laughed and said that would be over his parents' dead bodies. Somehow Chinese still think that lawyers subvert justice by saving murderers from death sentences. Anyway, he said that he would only get himself into jail should he swear at the judge in court when provoked. Interesting!
I had a Chemistry professor who said "sugar!" whenever she got flustered or upset. Most people would utter "sh*t" in undertone. My lab buddy, however, chose to say "shark!" whenever her experiments were going to pieces. We were doing organic chemistry experiments that were long, complicated and it was often tedious to get satisfactory result.
Here in a corner of Borneo, Chinese school boys say "Da bien" (sh*t) in abandon. I hear it in bus stops, shops near secondary schools. Interestingly, my son claimed that some of them limit such swear words to outside of the parental orbit. There is a tuition centre in my housing estate. Children were utilising hand phone to call for rides, often they play games and talk to their friends too. The few times I walked past, conversations were peppered with very colourful language, either in Mandarin or Cantonese.
Just a few days ago, I was commenting about English pronunciation, accent, and ability to persuade. One of the students in my son's tutoring group is 13 years old. He evidently has the gift of the gab. Without trying too hard, he could be witty and sarcastic. I said in passing that if he could improve his Bahasa (the national language, used in the courts), he would make a good lawyer. He laughed and said that would be over his parents' dead bodies. Somehow Chinese still think that lawyers subvert justice by saving murderers from death sentences. Anyway, he said that he would only get himself into jail should he swear at the judge in court when provoked. Interesting!
(1209) Music police
Mrs Francis is an avid orchestra fan. She watches musical concerts, opera, ballet, plays and visiting singer's concerts.
Her husband, however, is totally bored by such entertainment. It does not matter how mush the tickets cost, he invariably measures such events by how long he could sleep without snoring.
One day, his beloved daughter took part as Alice in a ballet end of the year performance: Alice in Wonderland. Well, he could hardly excuse himself this round. It looked like he had to suffer through it, whether he likes to or not. And the entire family and extended clan would be there to prevent him from sleeping.
It just so happened that Mr Francis sat on the second row dead centre in the auditorium. Every time he nodded off, the sweet young thing in front of him would turn her head swiftly to the right or to the left to talk to either seat partner. It was sweet justice, from the perspective of Mrs Francis, that every bout of sleep was interrupted by swishing hair slashing against Francis' bull dog face.
Believe you me, he didn't get to sleep at all. The long hair teenager acted unknowingly as a music police to wake him up time and again.
Her husband, however, is totally bored by such entertainment. It does not matter how mush the tickets cost, he invariably measures such events by how long he could sleep without snoring.
One day, his beloved daughter took part as Alice in a ballet end of the year performance: Alice in Wonderland. Well, he could hardly excuse himself this round. It looked like he had to suffer through it, whether he likes to or not. And the entire family and extended clan would be there to prevent him from sleeping.
It just so happened that Mr Francis sat on the second row dead centre in the auditorium. Every time he nodded off, the sweet young thing in front of him would turn her head swiftly to the right or to the left to talk to either seat partner. It was sweet justice, from the perspective of Mrs Francis, that every bout of sleep was interrupted by swishing hair slashing against Francis' bull dog face.
Believe you me, he didn't get to sleep at all. The long hair teenager acted unknowingly as a music police to wake him up time and again.
(1208) Courting allowance
Here in a back water town, I see many interesting dramas. I'll relate one.
Two families live within hailing distance. One on the left side and the other on the right side separated by about six houses. Family has a seventeen year old boy. Family B produced three pretty daughters. The middle girl who is fourteen years old chose our teenage boy hero as her boy friend. Please note that both families fully sanction the relationship.
In fact the girl's mum made plans that the boy's parents fully concur with. When the girl finishes her school certificate, at age 16(she must have skipped a year), both boy and girl friend will go to Taiwan to further their studies. The boy will go to university and the girl will go for make-up and skin care course.
Meanwhile, the boy is spending most of his allowance on her. He even saves up any extra to indulge her on her whims: maybe a facial in a new place that costs $120. If you look at his family background, you may see why it is so. The boy's uncle fell in love with a girl of a different race against the family's wishes. It happened that she was pregnant and they were forced to get married. He had no choice but to change his religion to follow her according to the law of the land. Sad to say the marriage did not last. She divorced him leaving behind two children for the father and grandma to care for. It is hard to believe but the eligible single father remained single.
Whether this relationship works out or not in the end, it does not matter. It is an acceptable girl. She is from the right race, right religion and correct background. AS the guy's dad and grandma are well to do, they don't mind indulging him with a hefty monthly courting allowance.
Two families live within hailing distance. One on the left side and the other on the right side separated by about six houses. Family has a seventeen year old boy. Family B produced three pretty daughters. The middle girl who is fourteen years old chose our teenage boy hero as her boy friend. Please note that both families fully sanction the relationship.
In fact the girl's mum made plans that the boy's parents fully concur with. When the girl finishes her school certificate, at age 16(she must have skipped a year), both boy and girl friend will go to Taiwan to further their studies. The boy will go to university and the girl will go for make-up and skin care course.
Meanwhile, the boy is spending most of his allowance on her. He even saves up any extra to indulge her on her whims: maybe a facial in a new place that costs $120. If you look at his family background, you may see why it is so. The boy's uncle fell in love with a girl of a different race against the family's wishes. It happened that she was pregnant and they were forced to get married. He had no choice but to change his religion to follow her according to the law of the land. Sad to say the marriage did not last. She divorced him leaving behind two children for the father and grandma to care for. It is hard to believe but the eligible single father remained single.
Whether this relationship works out or not in the end, it does not matter. It is an acceptable girl. She is from the right race, right religion and correct background. AS the guy's dad and grandma are well to do, they don't mind indulging him with a hefty monthly courting allowance.
(1207) To give or not to give
In the last blog, we talked about illicit hand phones that parents know nothing about. Let us follow such transactions through the years.
A bought a second-hand phone from a school mate. He placed it in another friend's house within walking distance from his home. As the phone ages, he could no longer continue to play certain games as they evolved until the old phone no longer could function efficiently running such a big program due to the memory constraints.
The old phone, however, is still perfectly functional. One could use it for What's app, We chat, sms, go online, take selfie and video. It has a certain monetary value for those who are not gamers. A could locate a buyer and unload his old phone before purchasing a brand new phone should he be able to save up enough dough. And of course such transactions are often risk prone. A friend's friend may not be trustworthy when it comes to financial dealing. Should any parent or teacher sniff any scent of such illicit sale or purchase, the authorities would clamp down on it and everyone loses either item or cash. Worse still, a person's credibility is totally gone in a moment.
Still, the smart phone is an essential part of our lives. You give it to a child too early and you create unnecessary problems. Yet if you with hold it for too long, your child will suffer the under development of digital soft skills which is so important for successful modern living.
A bought a second-hand phone from a school mate. He placed it in another friend's house within walking distance from his home. As the phone ages, he could no longer continue to play certain games as they evolved until the old phone no longer could function efficiently running such a big program due to the memory constraints.
The old phone, however, is still perfectly functional. One could use it for What's app, We chat, sms, go online, take selfie and video. It has a certain monetary value for those who are not gamers. A could locate a buyer and unload his old phone before purchasing a brand new phone should he be able to save up enough dough. And of course such transactions are often risk prone. A friend's friend may not be trustworthy when it comes to financial dealing. Should any parent or teacher sniff any scent of such illicit sale or purchase, the authorities would clamp down on it and everyone loses either item or cash. Worse still, a person's credibility is totally gone in a moment.
Still, the smart phone is an essential part of our lives. You give it to a child too early and you create unnecessary problems. Yet if you with hold it for too long, your child will suffer the under development of digital soft skills which is so important for successful modern living.
(1206) Game addict
Starting from Atari, video games on TV screen have entered the home as a means of entertainment. About 40 years ago, I spent an entire night glued to a monitor screen playing "dungeon and dragons". That was in the 24hour computer centre in the Science Building on campus. It was also the very last time I played any electronic game.
Here in a coastal city along the Eastern side of Borneo, it seemed that every other teenager is playing some smart phone game. That day as I walked past a Malay eating place two Malay teenagers were playing "Wang Tzi" (The prince) at 7am on a week day. It is a game from China.
Let us follow the electronic path of a sixteen year old boy. Dad bought him a smart phone for his 12th birthday. He made full use of it playing games of all kinds until the phone was worn out. Then he substituted each phone with his dad's cast off. By the time he is 14, dad confiscated his phone for weekdays because he was by then a game addict who would lose sleep to win. But dad did not know that he secretly saved up his allowance to buy a second hand phone from his school mate. He was smart enough to hide his illicit phone in his friend's house which is within walking distance from his home. Therefore even on weekdays he has access to games in the afternoons.
I heard from his friends that he was putting his game accounts for sale to raise fund to purchase new phone. By now he has invested many years of his free time to rise up in the gaming hierarchy and he has spent perhaps $1,400 into buying all kinds of accessories and software peripherals popular to teenagers in this part of the world. He is asking for $500 for each account. We will see if there is any takers!
Here in a coastal city along the Eastern side of Borneo, it seemed that every other teenager is playing some smart phone game. That day as I walked past a Malay eating place two Malay teenagers were playing "Wang Tzi" (The prince) at 7am on a week day. It is a game from China.
Let us follow the electronic path of a sixteen year old boy. Dad bought him a smart phone for his 12th birthday. He made full use of it playing games of all kinds until the phone was worn out. Then he substituted each phone with his dad's cast off. By the time he is 14, dad confiscated his phone for weekdays because he was by then a game addict who would lose sleep to win. But dad did not know that he secretly saved up his allowance to buy a second hand phone from his school mate. He was smart enough to hide his illicit phone in his friend's house which is within walking distance from his home. Therefore even on weekdays he has access to games in the afternoons.
I heard from his friends that he was putting his game accounts for sale to raise fund to purchase new phone. By now he has invested many years of his free time to rise up in the gaming hierarchy and he has spent perhaps $1,400 into buying all kinds of accessories and software peripherals popular to teenagers in this part of the world. He is asking for $500 for each account. We will see if there is any takers!
(1205) Change of perspective
It is interesting how a person can change her perspective quite a bit over the years.
Twenty six years ago, I was in silver city. As my youngest was in morning session for the first year in standard 4, I excused myself from my care group on Wednesday nights. To fit in the bed time for early rising, I started to attend a cell group from a sister church on Friday nights.
Veronica is the parent of a child in my youngest daughter's class. She invited me to join her group. For a consultant specialist in a private hospital, it is unheard of that a specialist doctor paid only $10 for her hair cut. That year, all three of her daughters were under the age of 10, so all four of the females would go to have their hair cut in the same saloon near the market. I must confess that I was a homemaker with zero earning potential, yet I paid $12 for a trim in a place near my housing estate. Well, I figure for a person without a car, the nearest place would make the most sense.
Lately, I visited her and wrapped up my third book in her lovely home. It was ten days of eight hour work to proof read and write up the preface and the epilogue. It was blessed silence in her mansion quite apart from the main road and traffic. I enjoyed three meals a day prepared by her maid. Laundry was taken care off. The phone was off and stored in a drawer upstairs. It was easy to do good work in such peaceful surrounding. Now I know why authors have their hideaway house. Only thing this poor and unknown author could not afford to own such a place. God has been good to me to supply me my good friend's home.
We talked about skin care one evening. Even though I have never been a well-to-do person, I invested money into my youngest' skin regimen. Somehow I knew she was destined for a public career, she has the looks, the personality, the capability and the poise to rise above the hum drum rank and file.
My hostess talked about how she spent money on facial for all three of her daughters. How the business worked is for a client to purchase a certificate worth $1,000 which will be valid for one calendar year. One could use it for facial or to purchase skin care products. That particular brand of products solved her elder two children's skin problems. From the details given, she was purchasing the fourth certificate a few days prior to my visit. I listened to all she said with patience and interest, but I know $680 for a year's worth of cleanser and toner would be way out of my daughter's pay grade, especially if she has to travel to a town three hours away for facials periodically.
Twenty six years ago, I was in silver city. As my youngest was in morning session for the first year in standard 4, I excused myself from my care group on Wednesday nights. To fit in the bed time for early rising, I started to attend a cell group from a sister church on Friday nights.
Veronica is the parent of a child in my youngest daughter's class. She invited me to join her group. For a consultant specialist in a private hospital, it is unheard of that a specialist doctor paid only $10 for her hair cut. That year, all three of her daughters were under the age of 10, so all four of the females would go to have their hair cut in the same saloon near the market. I must confess that I was a homemaker with zero earning potential, yet I paid $12 for a trim in a place near my housing estate. Well, I figure for a person without a car, the nearest place would make the most sense.
Lately, I visited her and wrapped up my third book in her lovely home. It was ten days of eight hour work to proof read and write up the preface and the epilogue. It was blessed silence in her mansion quite apart from the main road and traffic. I enjoyed three meals a day prepared by her maid. Laundry was taken care off. The phone was off and stored in a drawer upstairs. It was easy to do good work in such peaceful surrounding. Now I know why authors have their hideaway house. Only thing this poor and unknown author could not afford to own such a place. God has been good to me to supply me my good friend's home.
We talked about skin care one evening. Even though I have never been a well-to-do person, I invested money into my youngest' skin regimen. Somehow I knew she was destined for a public career, she has the looks, the personality, the capability and the poise to rise above the hum drum rank and file.
My hostess talked about how she spent money on facial for all three of her daughters. How the business worked is for a client to purchase a certificate worth $1,000 which will be valid for one calendar year. One could use it for facial or to purchase skin care products. That particular brand of products solved her elder two children's skin problems. From the details given, she was purchasing the fourth certificate a few days prior to my visit. I listened to all she said with patience and interest, but I know $680 for a year's worth of cleanser and toner would be way out of my daughter's pay grade, especially if she has to travel to a town three hours away for facials periodically.
(1204)Handmade mouse mama.
Looking at a book teaching mothers how to hand sew soft toys, I thought of one particular toy.
Until today, I haven't seen it. However, I have a detail description of it from my auntie. It is a cloth-made mama mouse. There is a hat matching the country cottage long dress. The mama mouse was holding a cloth basket made of cherry motive cloth trimmed with lace. Without using a ruler, I think from the hat to the hem of the dress is about ten inches. The overall colour scheme is pastel.
About six months after the birth of my last child, I lost the ability to walk. My toddler was sent to my parents' in laws, my baby was cared for by a day nanny who came to my house. My cousin who grew up in my parent's house (before I left for further studies and get married) bought and gave the above described toy to my toddler.
This is probably 26 years later. Yesterday I repaired a teddy bear shredded by a rather "violent" washing machine. The teddy was a Christmas present given by the church to my son (a Sunday School pupil) many years ago. My youngest was given a duck. The two duly exchanged their gifts. After all, the toy duck wore no clothes (therefore gender neutral) but the bear wore a sailor dress. Yes, that many years ago, even children under the age of 9 knew instinctively about such things.
I heard about the toy when my auntie was thinking of buying something like that for her first grand daughter. Interestingly my cousin the purchaser had forgotten all about the toy mouse. My uncle, however, gave my auntie an earful for contemplating to fritter away hard earned cash. He thought it would be ridiculous to spend $100 for such a toy. On the other hand, my mum firmly believed that a limited edition hand made soft toy would sell above $200.
*............
*
Until today, I haven't seen it. However, I have a detail description of it from my auntie. It is a cloth-made mama mouse. There is a hat matching the country cottage long dress. The mama mouse was holding a cloth basket made of cherry motive cloth trimmed with lace. Without using a ruler, I think from the hat to the hem of the dress is about ten inches. The overall colour scheme is pastel.
About six months after the birth of my last child, I lost the ability to walk. My toddler was sent to my parents' in laws, my baby was cared for by a day nanny who came to my house. My cousin who grew up in my parent's house (before I left for further studies and get married) bought and gave the above described toy to my toddler.
This is probably 26 years later. Yesterday I repaired a teddy bear shredded by a rather "violent" washing machine. The teddy was a Christmas present given by the church to my son (a Sunday School pupil) many years ago. My youngest was given a duck. The two duly exchanged their gifts. After all, the toy duck wore no clothes (therefore gender neutral) but the bear wore a sailor dress. Yes, that many years ago, even children under the age of 9 knew instinctively about such things.
I heard about the toy when my auntie was thinking of buying something like that for her first grand daughter. Interestingly my cousin the purchaser had forgotten all about the toy mouse. My uncle, however, gave my auntie an earful for contemplating to fritter away hard earned cash. He thought it would be ridiculous to spend $100 for such a toy. On the other hand, my mum firmly believed that a limited edition hand made soft toy would sell above $200.
*............
*
Sunday, January 19, 2020
(1203) Skills acquired
I ask myself what I did learn from the one-month work as child minder and cook?
The first answer is gratefulness that as a family we resisted big screen colour TV and wireless 24 hour TV programming. As my children were growing up, we moved from one rental property to the next. Without proper TV antenna, even a 20-inch colour TV screen was no fun to watch. When my children fell in love with the cartoon channel, it was my husband who veto having to pay $80 a month of subscription fee to Astro the cable network.
After I stopped working full time, my children were privileged to grow up with lots of children's books borrowed from public library. Imagine, if a mother gives 0-7 years of full time care to each child she bears, it usually equals to a career suicide if she has more than 2 children and if there is a gap between children. Yet I have seen friends who worked full time until the last child turned 7 before quitting their job to drive the car pools. Invariably they have tough time working against the habits of half grown children formed under other carers.
Of course those who worked that extra ten or more years would have accumulated much money in Employee Provident Fund. Perhaps they have invested in a well rounded share portfolio or own one rental property.
Going back to the topic at hand, I have achieved only two things:
1. The girl's table manners improved
2. Should the boy implement my suggestions, he would be able to overcome a range of social ineptness.
The first answer is gratefulness that as a family we resisted big screen colour TV and wireless 24 hour TV programming. As my children were growing up, we moved from one rental property to the next. Without proper TV antenna, even a 20-inch colour TV screen was no fun to watch. When my children fell in love with the cartoon channel, it was my husband who veto having to pay $80 a month of subscription fee to Astro the cable network.
After I stopped working full time, my children were privileged to grow up with lots of children's books borrowed from public library. Imagine, if a mother gives 0-7 years of full time care to each child she bears, it usually equals to a career suicide if she has more than 2 children and if there is a gap between children. Yet I have seen friends who worked full time until the last child turned 7 before quitting their job to drive the car pools. Invariably they have tough time working against the habits of half grown children formed under other carers.
Of course those who worked that extra ten or more years would have accumulated much money in Employee Provident Fund. Perhaps they have invested in a well rounded share portfolio or own one rental property.
Going back to the topic at hand, I have achieved only two things:
1. The girl's table manners improved
2. Should the boy implement my suggestions, he would be able to overcome a range of social ineptness.
(1202) Poltergeist?
This is a real incident that happened in Silver City many years ago.
There was this couple in my life group. Mr Tee was a contractor. Mrs Tee was a homemaker who takes care of toddlers as a profession. One day she tagged along with her sister to visit a tarot card reader. That very evening items started flying in her home. Mr Tee called the pastor and the entire prayer team turned up. After explaining how serious it was for a believer to dabble in the occult, the couple confessed in prayer. The phenomenon ceased.
In the same city, there is a woman who warned me not to let my children watch "Teletubie" on TV. She related what she read in a magazine. There was a brother and sister duo whose ages were four and two respectively. Their parents were active Christians. Yet the children regularly watched such TV programs, followed such video programs often and owned more than twenty such soft toys. One day the children were being extra difficult and the parents locked up every single one of the soft toys. Guess what happened? Objects flew, defying gravity. The end result was the Ministry team turned up in full force, Mum and Dad repented in prayer. The toys and video tapes were burned and destroyed that very evening.
At that time, there was no working TV in my house. The very next time such a program came on in my brother's house, I watched about five minutes of it with my children, my niece and nephew. To me it seemed artificial, stilted and not interesting. As I walked off, the children changed the channel immediately. Of course all of them were then more than six years old. Apparently that program was targeted at very young children. Since my children became avid readers at very young ages, it was not that difficult to discourage TV watching on normal school days.
There was this couple in my life group. Mr Tee was a contractor. Mrs Tee was a homemaker who takes care of toddlers as a profession. One day she tagged along with her sister to visit a tarot card reader. That very evening items started flying in her home. Mr Tee called the pastor and the entire prayer team turned up. After explaining how serious it was for a believer to dabble in the occult, the couple confessed in prayer. The phenomenon ceased.
In the same city, there is a woman who warned me not to let my children watch "Teletubie" on TV. She related what she read in a magazine. There was a brother and sister duo whose ages were four and two respectively. Their parents were active Christians. Yet the children regularly watched such TV programs, followed such video programs often and owned more than twenty such soft toys. One day the children were being extra difficult and the parents locked up every single one of the soft toys. Guess what happened? Objects flew, defying gravity. The end result was the Ministry team turned up in full force, Mum and Dad repented in prayer. The toys and video tapes were burned and destroyed that very evening.
At that time, there was no working TV in my house. The very next time such a program came on in my brother's house, I watched about five minutes of it with my children, my niece and nephew. To me it seemed artificial, stilted and not interesting. As I walked off, the children changed the channel immediately. Of course all of them were then more than six years old. Apparently that program was targeted at very young children. Since my children became avid readers at very young ages, it was not that difficult to discourage TV watching on normal school days.
(1201) Unexpected influence of toys
This is a continuing account of the nine-year-old girl. Prior to us starting the month, the father gave us house keys and a door key to a guest room. We could lock up whatever item deemed dangerous or interfering with daily lessons.
On the Friday right before their return to home town date (Tuesday), our sassy girl threw a challenge at my son. She thought he wouldn't dare to lock up her five soft toys. Normally he is a most patient and mild person, but throw him a serious challenge and you are going to have it- exactly what one does not want to happen.
And so the five soft toys were in detention over the week end. For the following two hours, she ranted. She screamed. She cried. She begged. To no avail! Then she calmed down and it was as if nothing unusual had happened.
The next Monday, we found her almost another person. Her American accent was fading. She began to make small grammar mistakes. Her voice was less shrill. She was less intense. Even her facial expression seemed different, less I-know-better-than-you and no more smirk. She run less. She looked for snacks less frequently. The desire to strut around naked was gone.
She began begging for the soft toys to be released. After ten minutes of argument, she gave up. We told her everything in the room would come out and the keys would be returned to her dad at 5pm. It was quite an extra-ordinary experience to underline how important it was for parents to choose toys, TV programs and activities that bring good influence to their children.
On the Friday right before their return to home town date (Tuesday), our sassy girl threw a challenge at my son. She thought he wouldn't dare to lock up her five soft toys. Normally he is a most patient and mild person, but throw him a serious challenge and you are going to have it- exactly what one does not want to happen.
And so the five soft toys were in detention over the week end. For the following two hours, she ranted. She screamed. She cried. She begged. To no avail! Then she calmed down and it was as if nothing unusual had happened.
The next Monday, we found her almost another person. Her American accent was fading. She began to make small grammar mistakes. Her voice was less shrill. She was less intense. Even her facial expression seemed different, less I-know-better-than-you and no more smirk. She run less. She looked for snacks less frequently. The desire to strut around naked was gone.
She began begging for the soft toys to be released. After ten minutes of argument, she gave up. We told her everything in the room would come out and the keys would be returned to her dad at 5pm. It was quite an extra-ordinary experience to underline how important it was for parents to choose toys, TV programs and activities that bring good influence to their children.
(1200) Sibling rivalry
Comparing eating habits, the 13-year old boy was a joy to feed. Dad took his two children and carer-tutors to eat a hefty breakfast. Lunch is at 12:30 pm. Tea is at three. No matter what I served, he took normal portions.
His sister, however, is different! Every half an hour she runs to the fridge. Even after eating an adult portion of duck noodle at 7:30am, by eight she munches on a few grapes. At ten out comes the orange to be pealed. Even when all fruits are eaten, she would dip her fingers into milo powder for licking. Of course it did not help that the sweet girl gets chocolates, pastries, donuts from neighbours and dad regularly.
Since she refused to co-operate in learning the national language, we located a few work books teaching cursive writing. As her brother was diligently reading and writing essays in the national language, she habitually runs in to disturb him.
Siblings fight. These two are rough. As they wrestle, run around the apartment, sits on each other by turns, my policy is non-interference as long as there is no broken bone or bleeding. They punched and kicked, yelled in pain and each heads for time out in different rooms. Since there is a 4 year age gap, the girl is obviously at a disadvantage physically.
Only once I was concerned enough to examine her back, noted a bruise and rubbed it with ointment I found. I really cannot understand why she kept going back for more punches and physical confrontations. It is as if she hardly suffers pain like any ordinary mortal girl.
His sister, however, is different! Every half an hour she runs to the fridge. Even after eating an adult portion of duck noodle at 7:30am, by eight she munches on a few grapes. At ten out comes the orange to be pealed. Even when all fruits are eaten, she would dip her fingers into milo powder for licking. Of course it did not help that the sweet girl gets chocolates, pastries, donuts from neighbours and dad regularly.
Since she refused to co-operate in learning the national language, we located a few work books teaching cursive writing. As her brother was diligently reading and writing essays in the national language, she habitually runs in to disturb him.
Siblings fight. These two are rough. As they wrestle, run around the apartment, sits on each other by turns, my policy is non-interference as long as there is no broken bone or bleeding. They punched and kicked, yelled in pain and each heads for time out in different rooms. Since there is a 4 year age gap, the girl is obviously at a disadvantage physically.
Only once I was concerned enough to examine her back, noted a bruise and rubbed it with ointment I found. I really cannot understand why she kept going back for more punches and physical confrontations. It is as if she hardly suffers pain like any ordinary mortal girl.
Friday, January 17, 2020
(1199) Good points
It is very easy to focus on problems and miss out on the good points of a child. I am still on the two children of previous blogs.
While the boy is a rather serious young person, the girl is full of smiles. I am probably an extremely low scorer on being touchy-feely, she still managed to wrangle quite a few hugs out of me every day.
Apparently last year during Christmas carolling the eight year old girl was physically chasing shy teenage boys for bear hugs. Apart from demanding hugs every fifteen minutes, she is a load of fun to be with. It was very easy to teach her to wipe dining table and wash her own cutlery and dishes. She is most enthusiastic about helping to prepare a meal.
As my son showed her a jar of homemade cookies given by a good friend, she agreed to a competition of cleaning glass shower door to earn a right to eat the goody. I showed her how to clean one side, she scrubbed and washed the other side. In the process, she came to appreciate how difficult it was for her home helper to earn the latter's wage. I suppose it is the case of a child from upper middle class family being cocooned by the parents' earning capacity.
While the boy is a rather serious young person, the girl is full of smiles. I am probably an extremely low scorer on being touchy-feely, she still managed to wrangle quite a few hugs out of me every day.
Apparently last year during Christmas carolling the eight year old girl was physically chasing shy teenage boys for bear hugs. Apart from demanding hugs every fifteen minutes, she is a load of fun to be with. It was very easy to teach her to wipe dining table and wash her own cutlery and dishes. She is most enthusiastic about helping to prepare a meal.
As my son showed her a jar of homemade cookies given by a good friend, she agreed to a competition of cleaning glass shower door to earn a right to eat the goody. I showed her how to clean one side, she scrubbed and washed the other side. In the process, she came to appreciate how difficult it was for her home helper to earn the latter's wage. I suppose it is the case of a child from upper middle class family being cocooned by the parents' earning capacity.
Monday, January 13, 2020
(1198) Running around unclothed
Not too long ago a mum in church moaned about her two year old daughter habitually took off any clothing and pranced about the house naked. That was because of sensorial distortion, it could be very uncomfortable for a child with autistic symptoms to wear certain material.
I am still writing about the nine-year-old I took care of for one month. She played with water in the kitchen sink until she needed to change her clothes. Well, it seemed an inevitable collateral damage of learning to wash dishes under a full jet of water.
Before she walked into the master bedroom, she started stripping. Then she walked stark naked into the attached bathroom to pee. I closed her bathroom door, told her not to show herself naked out of the bedroom. And I closed the bedroom door as well on my way out.
A few minutes later, she appeared with a short T-shirt but nothing on the lower portion and sashayed across the living room towards the balcony to retrieve an underwear. I promptly dropped the fish I was washing into the sink. She giggled and dodged the towel I located to enfold her. It was great fun for her to run around semi-naked. Her brother commented from the dining table that she habitually does that at home.
I am still writing about the nine-year-old I took care of for one month. She played with water in the kitchen sink until she needed to change her clothes. Well, it seemed an inevitable collateral damage of learning to wash dishes under a full jet of water.
Before she walked into the master bedroom, she started stripping. Then she walked stark naked into the attached bathroom to pee. I closed her bathroom door, told her not to show herself naked out of the bedroom. And I closed the bedroom door as well on my way out.
A few minutes later, she appeared with a short T-shirt but nothing on the lower portion and sashayed across the living room towards the balcony to retrieve an underwear. I promptly dropped the fish I was washing into the sink. She giggled and dodged the towel I located to enfold her. It was great fun for her to run around semi-naked. Her brother commented from the dining table that she habitually does that at home.
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