Saturday, October 15, 2011

(545) The love of gold

Here let me make it clear that I don't hate money. But neither do I love it. I need a reasonable amount of money to lead a simple life. My needs are few.

I can divide my life into four sections: before college, during college, back in my home town and away living in Silver City. Before college, I was an out and out extrovert. I used to have many friends and even more activities. I worked very hard during college as I wanted to qualify for another scholarship to stay on in USA. That I achieved not through good academic performance alone. God led a rich Christian to offer me the means to go on for my Masters degree. I met Jesus around that period  and received the call to return to my home country. I returned to work and marriage. My family and I have a good twelve years living in a small town that is called a city. Now I am back in the smog and noisy metropolitan area.

There are few ladies I count as good friends. One I met after I returned from US. She also just returned from four years in UK around then. We managed to meet and spend a fair amount of time together playing tennis and jogging during the week ends. I was married about six years ahead of her. We managed to keep up our friendship until I moved to Silver City. After that move it became increasingly difficult to keep in touch. Still we visited each other at least twice a year. Then she and her husband actually helped us locate our new house before we move back to the capital city.

As the years go by I noticed that her life became more and more dictated by money. As her business did not grow yearly because of her principle to be honest and above board, she looked into immigration. She told herself that she wants free university education for all her children. For that she gave up her business and become a salaried professional in her adopted country.

I know she inherited millions of our currency after the death of her mother. So she cannot claim to be poor or in need. Perhaps the fact that she married a gold digger husband who refused to work way before retirement age did not contribute to her life goal of accumulating more wealth. Lately she told me mournfully that no matter how much she tried to add to her nest egg, money seemed to come and then frittered away.

I listened to her frustration and I do understand her disappointment. But I don't know how to tell her that this is hardly the time to build up more earthly wealth. The last thing I want to do is to hurt her already bruised feelings. Perhaps as an immigrant in Australia, it is difficult to prosper as a salaried professional. Taxes are rather high. I do know that there is a lot of tension between husband and wife over money. Just to show you the level it went to is rather ridiculous: I used to drop by their place and invite myself for lunch before they left the country. One day their maid was told off for boiling three eggs more than was ordered because I turned up unexpectedly when they were not around. I used to enjoy talking to their children then. Let us think about it: how much does an egg cost a few years back? In a retail grocery store, it may cost thirty cents. But if we buy thirty in a super market, it merely costs twenty three cents. For 69 cents, the maid was reprimanded and I was embarrassed. There after, I brought my own lunch and a share more for the children if they fancy my food.

Each time she returned from Australia, she invited me to visit. I made all kinds of excuses. But the fact is I would hardly want to bunk in her house there. It would be too expensive to eat out for three meals a day. Yet I know better than to eat her food that she and her husband so carefully rationed. So you see, her love of money and my relative lack of it is blocking the friendship from growing deeper.  It does not lead to evil yet, but neither is it helpful in this sort of circumstances.

Perhaps as I grow older, I need to be increasingly be on the look out for like minded people. I would not belong with anybody who loves money. I have little to contribute and no influence to help anyone increase their stock pile. It is sad that divergent paths force people to part. That is in spite of the fact that I still like them and we shared a lot in the past.  I still wish them well.

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