(518) Immigration

A few days ago my daughter, Elizabeth, went to a farewell meal to send off a young friend. The girl and her family were going to migrate to Canada.

I had a few idle thoughts about this family. I wonder where exactly they are migrating to. If it is to Vancouver, property prices are sky high. Elsewhere, it must be pretty cold most of the year. As I saw this teenager grows, she seems to be dressing in clothing that requires less and less cloth to make. Perhaps she would have to try a different tack to be fashionable in a temperate climate. After all, in our tropical weather, it is really advantageous to expose more skin. It is truly more sensible to wear a pair of micro mini shorts and a tank top than the Muslim hijab ensemble.

Her parents were both successful business people. Her mum owns a chain of eight stores. Her dad also runs a chain of restaurants. When they pull up their stake and venture to half the globe away, they would have to start all over again. It must be quite a challenge to deal with a completely different set of climate, geography, people, culture, custom, languages ...

What I remember about the girl's mum is that she was impressed by Elizabeth's skills and charm in dealing with her and her daughter as a youth leader. She asked and was pointed out to me as Elizabeth's mum. I could see that she was visibly disappointed. And of course she could detect no resemblance between us, Elizabeth takes after her dad's family. I was dressed in such a way that no fashion conscious person would notice me nor would anyone look at me a second time. I could have been outstanding once as a student. Now you would wonder if I have slaved in the kitchen all of my life.

What attracted her most to Elizabeth was the respect and esteem my daughter exudes while talking to her. While you may think that could be in born, I have personally experienced that most of what was found in my children took years to cultivate. I can't just issue orders and expect to be obeyed. It takes "modeling", I must display equal respect to people from all walks of life in order for her to catch it. For little quirks I don't like, it took years to chip away. It was in reading "The Little Prince" that finally caused Elizabeth to realize that after everything was taken away: gold, ruby and diamonds, he was just an ordinary statue. Similarly, if youth, beauty and being witty are taken away, Elizabeth would be an ordinary person. Youth passes very fast, beauty fades, wit actually comes from God. What endures are qualities like kindness, love, mercy, compassion, faith, loyalty ... One day in her fifteenth year she decided that she better develop those qualities while she was young and popular. As her inborn God given qualities would not last into old age. And she did  not want to be like our neighbour who was once pretty but was fading away fast in her forties. What remained was a rather self-centered person who would rather die young than to be old and ugly.

The young girl we have been discussing is rather rebellious and think that her parents are her kill joys. She pouts, she sulks, she hides things from her family and think they do not want her to be happy. Despite all their wealth and success, she is  not a happy nor contented person. I am surprised that she likes Elizabeth and wants to spend time with my daughter. Interestingly both mother and daughter agree about Elizabeth. Both like and trust Elizabeth.

I certainly hope that in going to another country, the difficulty in adjusting will turn out to be a blessing for this young girl. Maturity will find her faster in the midst of change. May she become self-assured in the process. Adjustment can bind the family closer together. Difficulties breed character. May she find her centre in the new world and be happy and contented.