Friday, April 26, 2019

(1087) Teenage depression

Last blog I recorded woes of my contemporaries as moms of children in their twenties. This blog I will try to say something about teenagers' perspective.

By chance I heard of depression and suicidal thoughts of two teenagers: one who has passed the phase and the other who just got into the middle of it. Since I don't work with that age group, the info came from adults who are aware of it.

That reminded me of a lady I have heard about. As a student, she attempted suicide in Australia. It was not successful. She graduated and returned to her hometown and managed to get a job and later got married. We would imagine good things from then on... No, she left her husband with her infant daughter for about a year. Lots of prayers were said from well wishers, the impossible happened: she returned to her husband and they have a second child.

Life often is more than just career and child rearing. Both the lady's family and the husband's family play a part too. I have attended the husband's care group once and therefore know him vaguely. I can well imagine how he has to tread carefully as if he is stepping on thin ice. I have much sympathies for him. But still, he must be either very brave or simple minded to marry her in spite of  her past history. As far as I can see, the lady came from moneyed back ground and finance is not a factor in most of the conflict. If the lady's parents are not loving to her, I honestly don't think they would spend hundreds of thousands to send her studying abroad. If the lady lacked extra cash, she would not be able to live in a house of her own when she moved out of her marital home. As to whether the misunderstandings, conflicts, quarrels and any ill feelings were merely storms in a teacup, only the key players themselves know.

Interestingly all three suicidal females came from comfortable backgrounds and small families. Perhaps if they were poor, they would be spending all their time and energy on climbing the economic ladder. Feelings would take a second seat to practical things like supplementing one's allowance. When a person needs to plot and plan to work her way out of poverty, there is little incentive to wallow in depressive thoughts. Perhaps that is why when people have more material things, their emotional well being may be more vulnerable.

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