Thursday, September 13, 2012

(55) Sing You Home by Jodi Picoult

Whatever problem I may face in my marriage, infertility is not it. Reading Sing You Home opened my eyes. I could not understand why my old friends who had miscarriages disappeared from our reunions. Perhaps the children came into my life without much effort in terms of not needing fertility treatment. I did not envision the heart breaks others could have faced. Instead, I saw the beautiful and neat homes childless couples have. I imagine the luxury of personal time they have individually and as a couple. Having looked after a sick child for several nights consecutively, I would actually envy those childless friends of mine who could sleep through the night without having to attend to a child who woke up a few times to throw up or had soiled the bed.

While I have spent one summer hanging around a landlady who happened to be the best friend of a gay man, I didn't have any friend who is a lesbian. Personally, I found that gay man very personable, often times he was really a friend in need. Whenever his partner was out of town, he would come and have Sichuan dinners with us (my landlady and I). He was fun, very  knowledgeable, entertaining, and he was extremely articulate for being an IT man. Putting religion aside, forgetting about middle-class morality, he was easily one of the best guy friend I had met in America.

Imagine a girl who has a biological mother married to her birth mother, her biological father is actively participating in her life. What do you think her life is like? Well, it is not the typical scenario in most parts of the world. I would not want any one of my children to grow up in a family with two mothers or two fathers. Neither would I want any of my brood to hang out and spend extensive time in such a household. After saying that, I admit that I am rather conservative in these issues.(Liberals, shoot me!) But after reading the book, I do see the other side of the coin: namely Zoe and Vanessa have the right to decide to live the way they want. They could seek to parent a child by adoption or have a donated sperm to fertilize eggs from Vanessa. The constitution in America probably could be interpreted in such a way in some states to allow them to fulfill their desire to bring up their child in that respect.(Conservatives may shoot me now!) I did not grow up in a church, I chose Christianity as an adult after college. I find that I belong to the small group who do not see things as black and white. While I may choose to keep my opinions to myself, it does not mean that I agree with others in my fellowship group or church. Perhaps that is the precise reason why I chose the net as a platform to present my views.

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