For anyone who is reading my blog for the first time, a little background. I was probably born dyslexic with some gifts in-built for learning Chinese. At age twelve I chose to confront English and at great cost I struggled to be acceptably proficient in it. At age twenty one I lived for a while with a full blown dyslexic boy eleven years old. It was through looking at him that I realized that I must have been somewhat dyslexic when I was young. After my marriage I ventured into teaching remedial English to college students. By the time my youngest was three I stumbled into special education as a home tutor. When my youngest was fourteen, I met a few women who must have been learning disabled to whatever degree. I am still in touch with some of them today.
This blog is written to compare two of the women I have attempted to help. I met both through my old school mate. A little about this old friend, she has a child who was diagnosed dyslexic. While I self diagnosed myself, she was blissfully busy with her college, boy friend and later career and business. I worked, prayed and planned on early intervention for my children. They were more or less normal by the time they reached school age. My old friend had a hard time struggling with her boy, from age seven until he was seventeen. She met Annabel through her kindergarten hunt and Zelda as a car pool mum.
Both Annabel and Zelda are capable women. They both are very attractive to men. Annabel is still single in her forties, but not because she lacks faithful suitors. She is very good at keeping her many ex-boyfriends as close friends. Zelda, on the other hand, has a disastrous marriage when she was much younger. She, too, is swinging single and attracting men like flies.
Both of them told me they have worked themselves until total physical break downs. Annabel would spend four day week-ends resting. All she could do was eat whatever was in the house, sleep and go to the toilet before returning to bed. She would give her all either to her corporate boss or her own business venture. From what she said she has no switch to lower her speed of working. It was either going at full speed or total break down for a few days of recuperation. That year that I hung out with her, I knew of two break downs.
Zelda has a tendency to be anaemic. She regularly complained about being very tired. Of course she gets run down, being on line and working at her data base at all hours. One day I met her at four pm and her hands shake - low blood sugar. All she had eaten was two bananas and a cup of coffee. She had spent hours searching for information and been on the phone continually since nine am talking to clients.
I am beginning to wonder if it is the case that both strived extremely hard to overcome their respective disabilities. So much so that both of them over compensated. They both achieved a great deal: Annabel, with Cambridge level education, was earning something like $16,000 as a team manager in a financial institution in the early eighties. Zelda, who runs her own manufacturing operation in her mid twenties, was having an average income of $20,000 - $30,000 monthly. Zelda did not have the means to further her education at age 16.
I thank God that I have slowed down. My hard working husband kept the family afloat. It is thanks to him that I have the leisure to ponder much to jot down thoughts on this blog. I am also blessed with supportive children. I hope that by sharing these observations, it will help you in some way or other in understanding my favourite group of people: those who have to work very hard to fit into regular society.
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