(1259) Confucious saying

Yesterday I was talking about the roles of man and woman. Please don't get me wrong, I am educated and I did work outside the home many years. What I am talking about is taking over the role of one's husband in bringing home the bacon for a sustain period of time.

Many years ago as a young woman I used to think that Confucius is a die hard sexist. After all, he said that a woman without any money or money making talents is virtuous. In my modern mind, I thought it was alright either to have wealth or abilities that can make money. Surely that would be good assets for any person, man or woman.

Thirty years on, my view on such a matter changed. First, my best friend in pre-university became the CEO of a bank in one of the Middle-Eastern countries. Of course I was happy for her. Interestingly her husband went into semi-retirement to ferry their two children.

Next, my best friend after college became one of the premier lawyers in town. Her husband happened to be like 12 years older than her. After he was retrenched from a multinational firm, he also took things easy to become the three children's transporter. Shortly after that, they migrated to Canada.

The third case was my neighbour in Sabah, she worked long and hard in a Chinese regional company to put her three children through higher studies while her husband took it easy losing like two hundred thousand ringgit in an ill fated retail and wholesale business. There are men who are fantastic managers but hopeless businessmen.

Fourthly, a friend in Thailand rushed out to teach in both a government school and a private tutoring centre to make ends meet when her husband lost his high paying job. Her marriage crumbled and her ex managed to turn both her darlings against her. She lost custody of both off springs.

Last of all, a woman doctor wanted to get her child bearing years over in as short time as possible. She had two biological children within 18 months and adopted a third child whose age was in between the former two. There was a time period that she had three children under the age of 4. It was tough. Her husband had to give up his career to help the maid and his mother in child care. As a result they become a single income family. It does seem that while it is wonderful the wife helps supplement the family income, it actually is not a good idea that the wife takes over the task of bringing home the bacon. Surely not many men are good at nurturing, cooking, cleaning and all that a homemaker does to run the home.