If you have been reading my blog using the key word dyslexia, chances are you have read about my adult friend who supplied me with her unresolved symptoms. She came in many names, in fact she is most paranoid about being my subject in this blog. After a few years, she came to trust me enough to tell me more.
That day she told me confidentially that when she could no longer cope with any verbal abuse, she could dissociate her consciousness and step away from her body. In a way she was still standing or sitting there, but she also becomes an onlooker, thus the verbal tirade would not hurt as much.
When I told her about the Davies' Method of therapy for dyslexic children, she was visibly distressed. As I revealed more about my observation as a Home Tutor, what the mother of the target child said, and what the child himself testified about, my friend started coughing quite badly. On the one hand, it is to her advantage to know more about her condition, as knowledge would set her free. But on the other hand, she could not handle too much information at any one installment. Thus, though she is drawn to me, she could not handle listening to me for too long or too frequently. As you must have concluded by now, my pet topic is learning difficulties as a broad subject.
When I told her in detail about how my ex-student found it difficult to read, the reason was words danced around him; I saw anguish in her eyes. I realized she was getting to tread back into her landmine years. It must have been difficult! She conquered her own demons with no help whatsoever. Her salvation came in the form of English children's books. She would fail every subject except English. Some how by working triple hard, she passed major examinations. The few short term jobs she has had before she married did not work out. For one she was too disorganized to file or find documents. But as a language tutor now she is perfect. She takes students in all shapes, sizes, with all kinds of baggage and turned them into A students. In the process, she loves them, mothers those who are neglected for whatever reason. She worms her way into her students' hearts, she spoils them with attention and snacks. After a while they would work hard for her sake alone, so that she would be able to continue to earn a good living charging those well-to-do parents her rates.
After the therapy, my ex-student was able to center his attention about eight inches on top and slightly behind his head. Then with that anchored, he could read normally. For him, his point was yellow in colour. As a tutor who worked with him for at least a year before he underwent therapy, I could see him greatly improved. What I marveled at was he was installed with an activity level meter on top of his navel. The level of activity runs from 1 to 10. In order to study and absorb new things, he should tune it to 5. Most often, he bounced around at 8. It sounded like a huge imagination, yet it really worked. With reminding him about attaching his attention to his yellow point, tuning down his buoyant personality to 5, he could actually go through an exercise in English with no sweat. After a while, he no longer needed to have a special tutor and I moved onto other interesting students.
I know all these knowledge came too late for my friend the language tutor. But I am sure it helps to know that she belongs to a big group of sufferers worldwide. She was not a retard as others teased her years ago. She is not stupid as her siblings claimed. She is not crazy as her ex-husband presumed. She is just a dyslexic who made good. No mean feat! It is quite an achievement that she should be proud of!
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Saturday, September 17, 2011
(531) The Chase by Louisa M Alcott
When I was fourteen years old, we were using Little Women as our literature text. It was many years before I located Good Wives in a pile of old books in a jumble sale. I read Jo's Boys one summer in a community library in a suburban area when I was a college student in America. And it was after my children started reading that I finally read Little Men. It was not as well written as Little Women. I guess the author must be fed up about the long and drawn out tale across the generation. But readers are not to be deterred, demands must be met.
Imagine my surprise that there is another book published by her. This "new" book is totally different from the four books I have read over the years. I can't say it is better or worse, but it is difficult to imagine that such a different book is written by an author I am familiar with. This topic about obsessive love is more of a contemporary topic too. I think of Nemesis by Agatha Christie. Obsessive love kills eventually. Indeed, in these two books, "love" is a frightening thing!
Imagine my surprise that there is another book published by her. This "new" book is totally different from the four books I have read over the years. I can't say it is better or worse, but it is difficult to imagine that such a different book is written by an author I am familiar with. This topic about obsessive love is more of a contemporary topic too. I think of Nemesis by Agatha Christie. Obsessive love kills eventually. Indeed, in these two books, "love" is a frightening thing!
(530) Secrets by Freya North
It was interesting to read about house sitting. I was a student when it was both convenient and economical to house sit for friends' friend during the summer.
Here in this book, I read of professional house sitters who bring their little world with them into the house they are bound by contract to care for. That is very different from my amateur days of moving in with sufficient clothing with not much else.
Tess chose to keep her love child, that was the first step towards economic hardship. Then it did not help to have a failed business venture that left debts. It is really familiar. I have a friend who achieved financial success in her mid twenties. She had a few failed relationships and one brief marriage. Some how she kept on with a pregnancy when her partner told her to abort. When her daughter was in her teens, she failed in a daring venture and has unpaid debts since. These two years, she has been slowly clearing her debts to friends and relatives. It was a slow, tedious crawl upwards.
Joe sounded like a much broken man. His avoidance of monogamous relationship sounded like a fear to commit. It is uncanny that my friend's new face book hot friend also goes by the same moniker. Just like the story Secrets, the real live tess and joe could not walk away from each other. Of course a courtship on the internet is very different from that between a house sitter and the land lord. I was much amazed by the frequent quarrels they have had over the net.
Real life is not that different from fiction. In the book, it was ended as they live happily ever after. Although I have known a life group member who actually married her friend whom she met over the net quite a few years ago, I often wonder if such a feat could be repeated.
Here in this book, I read of professional house sitters who bring their little world with them into the house they are bound by contract to care for. That is very different from my amateur days of moving in with sufficient clothing with not much else.
Tess chose to keep her love child, that was the first step towards economic hardship. Then it did not help to have a failed business venture that left debts. It is really familiar. I have a friend who achieved financial success in her mid twenties. She had a few failed relationships and one brief marriage. Some how she kept on with a pregnancy when her partner told her to abort. When her daughter was in her teens, she failed in a daring venture and has unpaid debts since. These two years, she has been slowly clearing her debts to friends and relatives. It was a slow, tedious crawl upwards.
Joe sounded like a much broken man. His avoidance of monogamous relationship sounded like a fear to commit. It is uncanny that my friend's new face book hot friend also goes by the same moniker. Just like the story Secrets, the real live tess and joe could not walk away from each other. Of course a courtship on the internet is very different from that between a house sitter and the land lord. I was much amazed by the frequent quarrels they have had over the net.
Real life is not that different from fiction. In the book, it was ended as they live happily ever after. Although I have known a life group member who actually married her friend whom she met over the net quite a few years ago, I often wonder if such a feat could be repeated.
(529) Enigma
While waiting for university admission, Elizabeth took on coaching a student for examination. Although she made him go through work book exercises of all subjects, she specialised in teaching him mathematics. After she moved into the hostel for the academic year, I took over the task on week days.
It was interesting that I found out a few contrasting facts about him. He is fifteen years old. He spent the first six years studying in a Chinese medium school with English and the National language thrown in. Next he transitioned into a school where he did all his subjects in the National language except Maths and Science. He still studies English as a second language.
By the time Elizabeth was summoned, he was barely passing all his subjects. I was appalled by the English composition he wrote for his final exam. I was shocked by the silly and careless mistakes he made in his Maths paper one. He worked sums in his head, wrongly. He read his question in part, leaving out the line that states that the answer be presented in two decimal places. And he left questions with diagrams that look complicated, when in actual fact it was easily solved by one single observation.
Yet, when I went through his many mistakes in science, I found that he not only read faster than I. He could reason out arguments, chose two out of four statements just like that, within the time to snap his fingers. Now, that was unusual! Although I read English more slowly than Chinese, I am not a slow reader. Of course I can't compete with my son, Kenneth, who reads five, six lines at one go. I have seldom come across any college students who reads fast, let alone a fifteen year old.
His grammar could be atrocious, but once he was given sufficient points for content; the composition he wrote was quite acceptable. Surprisingly, he could summarise both in English and the National language rather well. He could pick out main points, articulate in simple sentences that fall within the word limit.
And this same boy does not read, at all. He did not read his literature book through, not even once. He could not remember reading any non-text book at all, in his entire life. After having had dedicated and interesting teachers in his first six years, he gave up not listening to any of his class teachers the last three years. There is a point that he is right, most of his current teachers probably could not even be compared to those he had when he was younger. But not to listen to a single lesson tentamount to committing academic suicide. I wonder if there are lots of boys like that within our educational system? Is that the reason why each year we have increasingly more girls who made it to government universities?
It was interesting that I found out a few contrasting facts about him. He is fifteen years old. He spent the first six years studying in a Chinese medium school with English and the National language thrown in. Next he transitioned into a school where he did all his subjects in the National language except Maths and Science. He still studies English as a second language.
By the time Elizabeth was summoned, he was barely passing all his subjects. I was appalled by the English composition he wrote for his final exam. I was shocked by the silly and careless mistakes he made in his Maths paper one. He worked sums in his head, wrongly. He read his question in part, leaving out the line that states that the answer be presented in two decimal places. And he left questions with diagrams that look complicated, when in actual fact it was easily solved by one single observation.
Yet, when I went through his many mistakes in science, I found that he not only read faster than I. He could reason out arguments, chose two out of four statements just like that, within the time to snap his fingers. Now, that was unusual! Although I read English more slowly than Chinese, I am not a slow reader. Of course I can't compete with my son, Kenneth, who reads five, six lines at one go. I have seldom come across any college students who reads fast, let alone a fifteen year old.
His grammar could be atrocious, but once he was given sufficient points for content; the composition he wrote was quite acceptable. Surprisingly, he could summarise both in English and the National language rather well. He could pick out main points, articulate in simple sentences that fall within the word limit.
And this same boy does not read, at all. He did not read his literature book through, not even once. He could not remember reading any non-text book at all, in his entire life. After having had dedicated and interesting teachers in his first six years, he gave up not listening to any of his class teachers the last three years. There is a point that he is right, most of his current teachers probably could not even be compared to those he had when he was younger. But not to listen to a single lesson tentamount to committing academic suicide. I wonder if there are lots of boys like that within our educational system? Is that the reason why each year we have increasingly more girls who made it to government universities?
(528) Phantoms by Dean Koontz
It is fiction that tied in with age old unexplained mysteries. Looking at those beautifully built monuments that were left to be reclaimed by nature, I have wondered what exactly exterminated such a distinct ancient civilisation in South America. We know that the Spanish had waged war successfully for decades, but that would not explain a hill top city that was both deserted, unknown and abandoned.
Koontz wove such mystery into modern day doomsday in a town called Snowfield in California. Here the police, the Governor, the army and the press were involved. Where unexplained deaths occurred, autopsies were performed. Scientists in space suits carried out their tests determining if it was chemical or biological weapons. Even specialists in outer space alien theory were invited to be present. Here the author built the image of an invincible monster. Almost, but not quite! The ego of the monster turned itself into an object to be examined. That in turn revealed its vulnerability. The desire for glory determined that the monster wanted an author to document its power. That bought time for the biologist to import an item which might destroy the monster.
After the monster was killed, it went on to show us that the two human followers of the creature were overcome by fire power while they tried to carry out more murders. As in traditional tales, the two heroes were rewarded by finding their soul mates. I felt like I was sitting by the fire side listening to the end of an exciting epic poem.
It is a well written book. However, it is unlikely I would read it again. My friend who lent me the book seemed to think differently. She had given me better books for recycling but she wanted this one back. Interesting!
Koontz wove such mystery into modern day doomsday in a town called Snowfield in California. Here the police, the Governor, the army and the press were involved. Where unexplained deaths occurred, autopsies were performed. Scientists in space suits carried out their tests determining if it was chemical or biological weapons. Even specialists in outer space alien theory were invited to be present. Here the author built the image of an invincible monster. Almost, but not quite! The ego of the monster turned itself into an object to be examined. That in turn revealed its vulnerability. The desire for glory determined that the monster wanted an author to document its power. That bought time for the biologist to import an item which might destroy the monster.
After the monster was killed, it went on to show us that the two human followers of the creature were overcome by fire power while they tried to carry out more murders. As in traditional tales, the two heroes were rewarded by finding their soul mates. I felt like I was sitting by the fire side listening to the end of an exciting epic poem.
It is a well written book. However, it is unlikely I would read it again. My friend who lent me the book seemed to think differently. She had given me better books for recycling but she wanted this one back. Interesting!
Friday, September 9, 2011
(527) Visiting
Over the festive days, we visited Elizabeth's former Vice Principal. Since we left Silver City, we have been visiting her family most years. Last year we went to enjoy her asam laksa on the first day of Moslem Year after Ramadan. We were really entertained by the stories of her son and daughter-in-law's exotic green lizard from South America. The year before, we sat in her sitting room looking at the bridal pictures of her son's wedding. This year, the beautiful bride has put on some weight, she looks like the wife of a prosperous restaurant owner.
The Vice Principal did not change much. After retiring from Government teaching, she joined the local International School. She kept house. She pampered her plants. She is a teacher to be reckoned with. Elizabeth is a very fortunate girl to go to a mission school with many serious teachers like this Vice Principal. Even though my country's educational system has turned to gear itself towards churning out A's, there are still a few schools where we find teachers who are dedicated and really educate the children.
Now that a person is measured in terms of the house she owns and the car she drives, we need to nurture more teachers who are called to teach. The salary alone may attract the wrong type of people. We need teachers who are there to make a difference. In my church, I am beginning to see the answers to our prayers for Godly teachers. There are a few youth training themselves to teach. May this trickle multiply many folds!
The Vice Principal did not change much. After retiring from Government teaching, she joined the local International School. She kept house. She pampered her plants. She is a teacher to be reckoned with. Elizabeth is a very fortunate girl to go to a mission school with many serious teachers like this Vice Principal. Even though my country's educational system has turned to gear itself towards churning out A's, there are still a few schools where we find teachers who are dedicated and really educate the children.
Now that a person is measured in terms of the house she owns and the car she drives, we need to nurture more teachers who are called to teach. The salary alone may attract the wrong type of people. We need teachers who are there to make a difference. In my church, I am beginning to see the answers to our prayers for Godly teachers. There are a few youth training themselves to teach. May this trickle multiply many folds!
Thursday, September 8, 2011
(526) Starting University
I just sent Elizabeth off to Uni with her father. It was interesting looking at the many parents who went to attend the talks given by the Uni officials. The roads to the hostels were bumper to bumper. We parked as directed and walked for a good fifteen minutes to get to her hostel.
Once she was registered, we climbed to her room and found two girls and their mothers cleaning the room. One mom actually brought a vacuum cleaner and was hoovering the dusty mattress. I left Elizabeth with her rags and her room mate's pail. High time she learns to be independent.
On the way back, I saw the only luxurious big model car with a well endowed girl and her entourage. They were carrying about fifty outfits of silk formal wear in crisp plastic covers out of the enormous boot. Well! Good luck with the closet that was about fourteen inches wide. Not unless she can persuade the hostel staff to let her pay triple the fee and kick out two other students. Space is a premium, a single bed, a double decker and a regular closet divided into three sections fitted in a room no bigger than fourteen by eleven feet. I did not even notice if there are any study desks. If there is, they must be mini desks.
I am very thankful she was accepted. With the low tuition there is no need for her to take a study loan. She will be one of the few graduates in a few years' time that will be debt free. Primitive as her living conditions will be, she will be a lot more comfortable than the children in any refugee camps. If she can live in harmony in such an environment with two room mates, chances are she would do well with any difficult co-workers in the future.
Once she was registered, we climbed to her room and found two girls and their mothers cleaning the room. One mom actually brought a vacuum cleaner and was hoovering the dusty mattress. I left Elizabeth with her rags and her room mate's pail. High time she learns to be independent.
On the way back, I saw the only luxurious big model car with a well endowed girl and her entourage. They were carrying about fifty outfits of silk formal wear in crisp plastic covers out of the enormous boot. Well! Good luck with the closet that was about fourteen inches wide. Not unless she can persuade the hostel staff to let her pay triple the fee and kick out two other students. Space is a premium, a single bed, a double decker and a regular closet divided into three sections fitted in a room no bigger than fourteen by eleven feet. I did not even notice if there are any study desks. If there is, they must be mini desks.
I am very thankful she was accepted. With the low tuition there is no need for her to take a study loan. She will be one of the few graduates in a few years' time that will be debt free. Primitive as her living conditions will be, she will be a lot more comfortable than the children in any refugee camps. If she can live in harmony in such an environment with two room mates, chances are she would do well with any difficult co-workers in the future.
(525) At the Altar by L.M. Montgomery
I just came back from my neighbour's house. While one sister is planning a spring wedding with her American boy friend, the other sister's relationship came to a stand still. Reason: boy friend's mom.
The situation reminded me of "The Wooing of Bessy" in At the Altar. In the story, the mother of Lawrence Eastman contrived to cause a quarrel between her son and his girl friend. She not only lied but put the blame on another person.
My neighbour was doing well with the boy friend's mom until one daughter came for a visit from New Zealand. For all we know, the visitor was the mischief maker. It seemed to me that if the prospective mom-in-law trusted her enough to seek her help in remitting funds from Thailand, it was most surprising that once the daughter returned to New Zealand, she was no longer welcome in the old lady's house.
In the story, true love triumphed as Lawrence went and checked to see if his mom told the truth. In real life, if a forty-five-year-old man is still tied to his mom's apron strings, I don't think my neighbour should cry over losing him!
The situation reminded me of "The Wooing of Bessy" in At the Altar. In the story, the mother of Lawrence Eastman contrived to cause a quarrel between her son and his girl friend. She not only lied but put the blame on another person.
My neighbour was doing well with the boy friend's mom until one daughter came for a visit from New Zealand. For all we know, the visitor was the mischief maker. It seemed to me that if the prospective mom-in-law trusted her enough to seek her help in remitting funds from Thailand, it was most surprising that once the daughter returned to New Zealand, she was no longer welcome in the old lady's house.
In the story, true love triumphed as Lawrence went and checked to see if his mom told the truth. In real life, if a forty-five-year-old man is still tied to his mom's apron strings, I don't think my neighbour should cry over losing him!
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
(524) P.Jackson & Olympians by Rick Riordan
One day my old school buddy who is a pre-Christian asked Elizabeth if she had seen any Harry Porter movies or read any of the series. My daughter's answer was I advised her not to read it when she was young. Now that she is an adult, she has lost the desire to read or watch any of them.
To be fair to my children, I did not either. Not that if I read any of those books, they would shake my beliefs. My stand now is my adult children are welcome to read them or watch the movies if they really want to.
By borrowing from two friends, Elizabeth and I read the "Eragon" series. We enjoyed them tremendously as folk tales. Perhaps there were former worlds where dragons were present. Perhaps not! But the important thing is we are living in our present world where we only see dragon dance during Chinese New Year celebrations.
Lately I have access to Riordan's series. I can assure you I spent many hours reading happily. Here I will record their names: The Lightning Thief, The Sea of Monsters, The Titan's Curse, The Battle of the Labyrinth, and The Last Olympian.
It may seem strange that a woman of my age with much grey hair is reading what some may consider as children's books. Well, I am still trying to catch up with the years when I was speaking, thinking and dreaming in Mandarin. I read my first English book with the help of my trusty English-Chinese dictionary when I was fourteen. I only managed to source and finish reading the Famous Five series when I was eighteen years old. All I can remember about the Greek Mythologies was a simplified reader I plow through in the dim past. Since then I have found lots of contradictory references to it in numerous books and magazine articles. A few years ago, I learned a little more of it from Agatha Christie's The Labour of Hercules.
I thought the authors or the historians got all mixed up over Greek mythologies. It was not until Riordan pointed out in his series that there was a Titan's age and then an Olympian age that I began to see that many sets of players fought for power over thousands of years. It sounded like the dynasties in China. The only difference is that the Chinese killed everyone connected with the deposed Emperor. The Olympians cannot kill their predecessors for good because they were supposed to be immortal. I wonder how much was related in the mythologies and how much was made up by Riordan.
The fact that Percy chose to remain a mortal so he would not outlive Annabeth made the series an Adventure love story. In a way it is a happy ending. The irresponsible Olympians were bound by oath for a time to acknowledge their half-blood off-springs and bring them to the training camp. It was good to have the population of the camp increase. It sounded like in the ancient days where angels took human females and begot children who become the heroes of old.
To be fair to my children, I did not either. Not that if I read any of those books, they would shake my beliefs. My stand now is my adult children are welcome to read them or watch the movies if they really want to.
By borrowing from two friends, Elizabeth and I read the "Eragon" series. We enjoyed them tremendously as folk tales. Perhaps there were former worlds where dragons were present. Perhaps not! But the important thing is we are living in our present world where we only see dragon dance during Chinese New Year celebrations.
Lately I have access to Riordan's series. I can assure you I spent many hours reading happily. Here I will record their names: The Lightning Thief, The Sea of Monsters, The Titan's Curse, The Battle of the Labyrinth, and The Last Olympian.
It may seem strange that a woman of my age with much grey hair is reading what some may consider as children's books. Well, I am still trying to catch up with the years when I was speaking, thinking and dreaming in Mandarin. I read my first English book with the help of my trusty English-Chinese dictionary when I was fourteen. I only managed to source and finish reading the Famous Five series when I was eighteen years old. All I can remember about the Greek Mythologies was a simplified reader I plow through in the dim past. Since then I have found lots of contradictory references to it in numerous books and magazine articles. A few years ago, I learned a little more of it from Agatha Christie's The Labour of Hercules.
I thought the authors or the historians got all mixed up over Greek mythologies. It was not until Riordan pointed out in his series that there was a Titan's age and then an Olympian age that I began to see that many sets of players fought for power over thousands of years. It sounded like the dynasties in China. The only difference is that the Chinese killed everyone connected with the deposed Emperor. The Olympians cannot kill their predecessors for good because they were supposed to be immortal. I wonder how much was related in the mythologies and how much was made up by Riordan.
The fact that Percy chose to remain a mortal so he would not outlive Annabeth made the series an Adventure love story. In a way it is a happy ending. The irresponsible Olympians were bound by oath for a time to acknowledge their half-blood off-springs and bring them to the training camp. It was good to have the population of the camp increase. It sounded like in the ancient days where angels took human females and begot children who become the heroes of old.
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
(523) Total shut down
For anyone who is reading my blog for the first time, a little background. I was probably born dyslexic with some gifts in-built for learning Chinese. At age twelve I chose to confront English and at great cost I struggled to be acceptably proficient in it. At age twenty one I lived for a while with a full blown dyslexic boy eleven years old. It was through looking at him that I realized that I must have been somewhat dyslexic when I was young. After my marriage I ventured into teaching remedial English to college students. By the time my youngest was three I stumbled into special education as a home tutor. When my youngest was fourteen, I met a few women who must have been learning disabled to whatever degree. I am still in touch with some of them today.
This blog is written to compare two of the women I have attempted to help. I met both through my old school mate. A little about this old friend, she has a child who was diagnosed dyslexic. While I self diagnosed myself, she was blissfully busy with her college, boy friend and later career and business. I worked, prayed and planned on early intervention for my children. They were more or less normal by the time they reached school age. My old friend had a hard time struggling with her boy, from age seven until he was seventeen. She met Annabel through her kindergarten hunt and Zelda as a car pool mum.
Both Annabel and Zelda are capable women. They both are very attractive to men. Annabel is still single in her forties, but not because she lacks faithful suitors. She is very good at keeping her many ex-boyfriends as close friends. Zelda, on the other hand, has a disastrous marriage when she was much younger. She, too, is swinging single and attracting men like flies.
Both of them told me they have worked themselves until total physical break downs. Annabel would spend four day week-ends resting. All she could do was eat whatever was in the house, sleep and go to the toilet before returning to bed. She would give her all either to her corporate boss or her own business venture. From what she said she has no switch to lower her speed of working. It was either going at full speed or total break down for a few days of recuperation. That year that I hung out with her, I knew of two break downs.
Zelda has a tendency to be anaemic. She regularly complained about being very tired. Of course she gets run down, being on line and working at her data base at all hours. One day I met her at four pm and her hands shake - low blood sugar. All she had eaten was two bananas and a cup of coffee. She had spent hours searching for information and been on the phone continually since nine am talking to clients.
I am beginning to wonder if it is the case that both strived extremely hard to overcome their respective disabilities. So much so that both of them over compensated. They both achieved a great deal: Annabel, with Cambridge level education, was earning something like $16,000 as a team manager in a financial institution in the early eighties. Zelda, who runs her own manufacturing operation in her mid twenties, was having an average income of $20,000 - $30,000 monthly. Zelda did not have the means to further her education at age 16.
I thank God that I have slowed down. My hard working husband kept the family afloat. It is thanks to him that I have the leisure to ponder much to jot down thoughts on this blog. I am also blessed with supportive children. I hope that by sharing these observations, it will help you in some way or other in understanding my favourite group of people: those who have to work very hard to fit into regular society.
This blog is written to compare two of the women I have attempted to help. I met both through my old school mate. A little about this old friend, she has a child who was diagnosed dyslexic. While I self diagnosed myself, she was blissfully busy with her college, boy friend and later career and business. I worked, prayed and planned on early intervention for my children. They were more or less normal by the time they reached school age. My old friend had a hard time struggling with her boy, from age seven until he was seventeen. She met Annabel through her kindergarten hunt and Zelda as a car pool mum.
Both Annabel and Zelda are capable women. They both are very attractive to men. Annabel is still single in her forties, but not because she lacks faithful suitors. She is very good at keeping her many ex-boyfriends as close friends. Zelda, on the other hand, has a disastrous marriage when she was much younger. She, too, is swinging single and attracting men like flies.
Both of them told me they have worked themselves until total physical break downs. Annabel would spend four day week-ends resting. All she could do was eat whatever was in the house, sleep and go to the toilet before returning to bed. She would give her all either to her corporate boss or her own business venture. From what she said she has no switch to lower her speed of working. It was either going at full speed or total break down for a few days of recuperation. That year that I hung out with her, I knew of two break downs.
Zelda has a tendency to be anaemic. She regularly complained about being very tired. Of course she gets run down, being on line and working at her data base at all hours. One day I met her at four pm and her hands shake - low blood sugar. All she had eaten was two bananas and a cup of coffee. She had spent hours searching for information and been on the phone continually since nine am talking to clients.
I am beginning to wonder if it is the case that both strived extremely hard to overcome their respective disabilities. So much so that both of them over compensated. They both achieved a great deal: Annabel, with Cambridge level education, was earning something like $16,000 as a team manager in a financial institution in the early eighties. Zelda, who runs her own manufacturing operation in her mid twenties, was having an average income of $20,000 - $30,000 monthly. Zelda did not have the means to further her education at age 16.
I thank God that I have slowed down. My hard working husband kept the family afloat. It is thanks to him that I have the leisure to ponder much to jot down thoughts on this blog. I am also blessed with supportive children. I hope that by sharing these observations, it will help you in some way or other in understanding my favourite group of people: those who have to work very hard to fit into regular society.
Monday, August 29, 2011
(522) Directionally challenged n bruises
I was sitting in my friend's car. We were talking about this and that. Suddenly she asked me if I know the shortest way home from where we were at that moment. I actually know where we were. We were a road away from Elizabeth's piano teacher's residence. But since she has been driving herself to piano lessons for at least two years, I cannot remember the way we normally drive home from there. But please note I was not lost, perhaps I would take a circuit around the entire housing area, I would be able to get home after burning a little extra gas.
She could relate to that. After all, when I encouraged her to take up driving again and buy herself a car to get around in, she claimed that she has the world's worst sense of direction. This is like two years later, she has come a long way. She gets around on her own. When she is not confident about going to certain places, she uses the GPS. After all, neither of us need to earn a living as taxi drivers. We can certainly survive pretty well with our limited sense of direction.
That was when she confessed that although she has lived in the same apartment for the past four years, she still knocks her shin or her elbow against her bedroom door frame. Now that was an interesting piece of information! I can't say I have the problem now. But for years and years I would have to contend with blue blacks (bruises) that I have no idea when I hurt myself. My deceased grandma used to laugh and say that I got pinched by ghosts in my dreams. No! I have no hematological problems. I see Elizabeth rubbing her unexplained bruises with Counterpain just two nights ago, it is almost a weekly event. If she is stressed and has a full schedule, it happens more often.
My husband, my brothers, my parents and Elizabeth's siblings do not have this problem. Since Elizabeth was seven, we have been having her friend, Cassandra, home with us often. Cassandra used to be much worse at that point of time, she knocked into furniture, door, cars, and even walls if the passage way is narrow. Over time Cassandra improved. I must ask her about this the next time I see her. Wonder if she is like Elizabeth, now and then having the same problem, or has gotten over it like me. Or Cassandra suffers it in a chronic way like my friend. I know it is not funny. But what can one do when she has this kind of funny problem, other than having a good laugh over it! I don't think anyone would go to the hospital and look up the relevant specialist over a mundane and non-threatening problem like this. I do know that it indicates that one part of the brain is not functioning as it should. Well! My friend is already in her forties. She actually earns very well teaching students weak in English. We both know that she has made a strong point out of her weaknesses. If she had not suffered in school over whatever difficulties over all subjects except English, she would not end up being such a good tutor to all types of students.
I am an armchair special education hobbyist. I think my friend, Cassandra, Elizabeth and I all display one specific symptom of dyslexia. I might have been blessed with a brain wired for the Chinese language, but I was and still is foolhardy enough to keep working on my shadow area(weakest subject). My friend has been taken for a fool by her beloved. She has been taken for a ride as well as he divorced her when she stopped obeying him and fought back. Cassandra is very blessed as her current boy friend (very first and hopefully they would marry) loves her enough to take over all cleaning duties. You see, her skin breaks up after coming into contact with detergent. I have skin almost as bad but it still tolerates certain brands after dilution. Elizabeth is having a whale of a time: she is shouldering a normal college load while juggling a few hats in church, she just signed up for a major role in the Christmas play that would entail many hours of practice. Boy friends are pretty far from the normal list of things on her mind.
She could relate to that. After all, when I encouraged her to take up driving again and buy herself a car to get around in, she claimed that she has the world's worst sense of direction. This is like two years later, she has come a long way. She gets around on her own. When she is not confident about going to certain places, she uses the GPS. After all, neither of us need to earn a living as taxi drivers. We can certainly survive pretty well with our limited sense of direction.
That was when she confessed that although she has lived in the same apartment for the past four years, she still knocks her shin or her elbow against her bedroom door frame. Now that was an interesting piece of information! I can't say I have the problem now. But for years and years I would have to contend with blue blacks (bruises) that I have no idea when I hurt myself. My deceased grandma used to laugh and say that I got pinched by ghosts in my dreams. No! I have no hematological problems. I see Elizabeth rubbing her unexplained bruises with Counterpain just two nights ago, it is almost a weekly event. If she is stressed and has a full schedule, it happens more often.
My husband, my brothers, my parents and Elizabeth's siblings do not have this problem. Since Elizabeth was seven, we have been having her friend, Cassandra, home with us often. Cassandra used to be much worse at that point of time, she knocked into furniture, door, cars, and even walls if the passage way is narrow. Over time Cassandra improved. I must ask her about this the next time I see her. Wonder if she is like Elizabeth, now and then having the same problem, or has gotten over it like me. Or Cassandra suffers it in a chronic way like my friend. I know it is not funny. But what can one do when she has this kind of funny problem, other than having a good laugh over it! I don't think anyone would go to the hospital and look up the relevant specialist over a mundane and non-threatening problem like this. I do know that it indicates that one part of the brain is not functioning as it should. Well! My friend is already in her forties. She actually earns very well teaching students weak in English. We both know that she has made a strong point out of her weaknesses. If she had not suffered in school over whatever difficulties over all subjects except English, she would not end up being such a good tutor to all types of students.
I am an armchair special education hobbyist. I think my friend, Cassandra, Elizabeth and I all display one specific symptom of dyslexia. I might have been blessed with a brain wired for the Chinese language, but I was and still is foolhardy enough to keep working on my shadow area(weakest subject). My friend has been taken for a fool by her beloved. She has been taken for a ride as well as he divorced her when she stopped obeying him and fought back. Cassandra is very blessed as her current boy friend (very first and hopefully they would marry) loves her enough to take over all cleaning duties. You see, her skin breaks up after coming into contact with detergent. I have skin almost as bad but it still tolerates certain brands after dilution. Elizabeth is having a whale of a time: she is shouldering a normal college load while juggling a few hats in church, she just signed up for a major role in the Christmas play that would entail many hours of practice. Boy friends are pretty far from the normal list of things on her mind.
Saturday, August 27, 2011
(521) Upbringing 54
Remember Elizabeth's applications to universities? She was accepted into my old university with partial financial aid. She was rejected by the university in China. And she was accepted by a local university less than 50 Km from where we live.
Actually, if we were to scrape together every dollar we own we can afford to send her to USA this year. But if we do that, there is no certainty that we could raise the required amount for the next three years. After all, the main part of our contribution came as an outright gift which would not be repeated. So what my brother commented about USA came true: the financial melt down did affect foreign scholarships. If Elizabeth is a decisive and quick to adapt person, I may send her with the intention of transfer to a state university within one year. But as it is, a bird in hand is worth two in the bush. It is prudent to take the local offer which costs a fraction of what we have to pay in USA. Here the government subsidized the students heavily. The entire degree would cost only a fifth of what we were to pay for the first year of a USA education.
Despite the rejection of the university in China, Elizabeth was still on the waiting list when she checked the web site. Now I wonder if she would go if the late offer does come, once she settles down. Of course the chance of being selected in the second or third intake is slim. After all, there were fourteen hundred applications for limited places. But I suppose all things are possible if God is willing.
We will wait and see what happens next. I am still holding a suitcase full of winter clothing, wondering why God gave it to us so providentially three years ago when we prayed about a scholarship which would enable her to study pre-university abroad. She did not win the scholarship but the lovely cloths remained. I am still waiting to see why the clothes came, surely there must be a good reason. God never make mistakes.
Actually, if we were to scrape together every dollar we own we can afford to send her to USA this year. But if we do that, there is no certainty that we could raise the required amount for the next three years. After all, the main part of our contribution came as an outright gift which would not be repeated. So what my brother commented about USA came true: the financial melt down did affect foreign scholarships. If Elizabeth is a decisive and quick to adapt person, I may send her with the intention of transfer to a state university within one year. But as it is, a bird in hand is worth two in the bush. It is prudent to take the local offer which costs a fraction of what we have to pay in USA. Here the government subsidized the students heavily. The entire degree would cost only a fifth of what we were to pay for the first year of a USA education.
Despite the rejection of the university in China, Elizabeth was still on the waiting list when she checked the web site. Now I wonder if she would go if the late offer does come, once she settles down. Of course the chance of being selected in the second or third intake is slim. After all, there were fourteen hundred applications for limited places. But I suppose all things are possible if God is willing.
We will wait and see what happens next. I am still holding a suitcase full of winter clothing, wondering why God gave it to us so providentially three years ago when we prayed about a scholarship which would enable her to study pre-university abroad. She did not win the scholarship but the lovely cloths remained. I am still waiting to see why the clothes came, surely there must be a good reason. God never make mistakes.
(520) The perfect mate for Zelda
There is a friend whom I have been listening and encouraging for the past five years. She prayed for a husband and has a long list of criteria. I never consciously take notes as I am not a trained staff. But I can certainly rattle off her list off hand.
1. The guy must be tall, at least five nine.
2. He must have a clear missionary call.
3. He must be obedient to God.
4. He must be single, or divorced with no woman claiming him, or widowed
5. Preferably be musically inclined.
6. Preferably be gifted with tongues and spiritual gifts, presently serving in his local church.
7. He is to lead, not to follow her
8. He should not be over weight
9. She would be pleased with his appearance.
10. He should not be more than five years older than her
Out of a tough list of ten, I must say that her present intended whom she got to know through the internet has nine of her criteria. The only one not perfectly matched is number eight. Yet looking at his photo, I cannot say that he is fat. If he loses 5-8 kilo, he should have an acceptable B.M.I. for a six footer with a big frame.
Looking at the situation, I am of the opinion that there can be perfect candidates, but I think both husband and wife have to work at being the perfect mates for each other. There is no such thing as the perfect husband that is born for a particular woman.
Please read (749),(361), (383), (401), (487), (994), (9)
1. The guy must be tall, at least five nine.
2. He must have a clear missionary call.
3. He must be obedient to God.
4. He must be single, or divorced with no woman claiming him, or widowed
5. Preferably be musically inclined.
6. Preferably be gifted with tongues and spiritual gifts, presently serving in his local church.
7. He is to lead, not to follow her
8. He should not be over weight
9. She would be pleased with his appearance.
10. He should not be more than five years older than her
Out of a tough list of ten, I must say that her present intended whom she got to know through the internet has nine of her criteria. The only one not perfectly matched is number eight. Yet looking at his photo, I cannot say that he is fat. If he loses 5-8 kilo, he should have an acceptable B.M.I. for a six footer with a big frame.
Looking at the situation, I am of the opinion that there can be perfect candidates, but I think both husband and wife have to work at being the perfect mates for each other. There is no such thing as the perfect husband that is born for a particular woman.
Please read (749),(361), (383), (401), (487), (994), (9)
(519) Morning sickness
A young wife is in the family way. She was often sick. One moment she was talking in a most lethargic way, the next she was running to the rest room to throw up.
One day she commented how her friends never throw up throughout the nine months. I happened to disagree that it was a good thing, this nauseous feeling: it indicated that the foetus was digging deeper and getting a firmer hold onto the lining of the womb. The one pregnancy I had had no vomiting almost ended in a miscarriage.
The first trimester passed very fast. She is once again healthy and herself. She related to Elizabeth how she was fed up with many people who told her she imagined the whole nauseous business. Others told her she did not eat the right things, or she did the wrong things. I was the only one who could explain to her nature's way of ensuring that this particular pregnancy would result in a lively, lovely baby. Thank God that there is a logical explanation if we look for it.
One day she commented how her friends never throw up throughout the nine months. I happened to disagree that it was a good thing, this nauseous feeling: it indicated that the foetus was digging deeper and getting a firmer hold onto the lining of the womb. The one pregnancy I had had no vomiting almost ended in a miscarriage.
The first trimester passed very fast. She is once again healthy and herself. She related to Elizabeth how she was fed up with many people who told her she imagined the whole nauseous business. Others told her she did not eat the right things, or she did the wrong things. I was the only one who could explain to her nature's way of ensuring that this particular pregnancy would result in a lively, lovely baby. Thank God that there is a logical explanation if we look for it.
Saturday, August 20, 2011
(518) Immigration
A few days ago my daughter, Elizabeth, went to a farewell meal to send off a young friend. The girl and her family were going to migrate to Canada.
I had a few idle thoughts about this family. I wonder where exactly they are migrating to. If it is to Vancouver, property prices are sky high. Elsewhere, it must be pretty cold most of the year. As I saw this teenager grows, she seems to be dressing in clothing that requires less and less cloth to make. Perhaps she would have to try a different tack to be fashionable in a temperate climate. After all, in our tropical weather, it is really advantageous to expose more skin. It is truly more sensible to wear a pair of micro mini shorts and a tank top than the Muslim hijab ensemble.
Her parents were both successful business people. Her mum owns a chain of eight stores. Her dad also runs a chain of restaurants. When they pull up their stake and venture to half the globe away, they would have to start all over again. It must be quite a challenge to deal with a completely different set of climate, geography, people, culture, custom, languages ...
What I remember about the girl's mum is that she was impressed by Elizabeth's skills and charm in dealing with her and her daughter as a youth leader. She asked and was pointed out to me as Elizabeth's mum. I could see that she was visibly disappointed. And of course she could detect no resemblance between us, Elizabeth takes after her dad's family. I was dressed in such a way that no fashion conscious person would notice me nor would anyone look at me a second time. I could have been outstanding once as a student. Now you would wonder if I have slaved in the kitchen all of my life.
What attracted her most to Elizabeth was the respect and esteem my daughter exudes while talking to her. While you may think that could be in born, I have personally experienced that most of what was found in my children took years to cultivate. I can't just issue orders and expect to be obeyed. It takes "modeling", I must display equal respect to people from all walks of life in order for her to catch it. For little quirks I don't like, it took years to chip away. It was in reading "The Little Prince" that finally caused Elizabeth to realize that after everything was taken away: gold, ruby and diamonds, he was just an ordinary statue. Similarly, if youth, beauty and being witty are taken away, Elizabeth would be an ordinary person. Youth passes very fast, beauty fades, wit actually comes from God. What endures are qualities like kindness, love, mercy, compassion, faith, loyalty ... One day in her fifteenth year she decided that she better develop those qualities while she was young and popular. As her inborn God given qualities would not last into old age. And she did not want to be like our neighbour who was once pretty but was fading away fast in her forties. What remained was a rather self-centered person who would rather die young than to be old and ugly.
The young girl we have been discussing is rather rebellious and think that her parents are her kill joys. She pouts, she sulks, she hides things from her family and think they do not want her to be happy. Despite all their wealth and success, she is not a happy nor contented person. I am surprised that she likes Elizabeth and wants to spend time with my daughter. Interestingly both mother and daughter agree about Elizabeth. Both like and trust Elizabeth.
I certainly hope that in going to another country, the difficulty in adjusting will turn out to be a blessing for this young girl. Maturity will find her faster in the midst of change. May she become self-assured in the process. Adjustment can bind the family closer together. Difficulties breed character. May she find her centre in the new world and be happy and contented.
I had a few idle thoughts about this family. I wonder where exactly they are migrating to. If it is to Vancouver, property prices are sky high. Elsewhere, it must be pretty cold most of the year. As I saw this teenager grows, she seems to be dressing in clothing that requires less and less cloth to make. Perhaps she would have to try a different tack to be fashionable in a temperate climate. After all, in our tropical weather, it is really advantageous to expose more skin. It is truly more sensible to wear a pair of micro mini shorts and a tank top than the Muslim hijab ensemble.
Her parents were both successful business people. Her mum owns a chain of eight stores. Her dad also runs a chain of restaurants. When they pull up their stake and venture to half the globe away, they would have to start all over again. It must be quite a challenge to deal with a completely different set of climate, geography, people, culture, custom, languages ...
What I remember about the girl's mum is that she was impressed by Elizabeth's skills and charm in dealing with her and her daughter as a youth leader. She asked and was pointed out to me as Elizabeth's mum. I could see that she was visibly disappointed. And of course she could detect no resemblance between us, Elizabeth takes after her dad's family. I was dressed in such a way that no fashion conscious person would notice me nor would anyone look at me a second time. I could have been outstanding once as a student. Now you would wonder if I have slaved in the kitchen all of my life.
What attracted her most to Elizabeth was the respect and esteem my daughter exudes while talking to her. While you may think that could be in born, I have personally experienced that most of what was found in my children took years to cultivate. I can't just issue orders and expect to be obeyed. It takes "modeling", I must display equal respect to people from all walks of life in order for her to catch it. For little quirks I don't like, it took years to chip away. It was in reading "The Little Prince" that finally caused Elizabeth to realize that after everything was taken away: gold, ruby and diamonds, he was just an ordinary statue. Similarly, if youth, beauty and being witty are taken away, Elizabeth would be an ordinary person. Youth passes very fast, beauty fades, wit actually comes from God. What endures are qualities like kindness, love, mercy, compassion, faith, loyalty ... One day in her fifteenth year she decided that she better develop those qualities while she was young and popular. As her inborn God given qualities would not last into old age. And she did not want to be like our neighbour who was once pretty but was fading away fast in her forties. What remained was a rather self-centered person who would rather die young than to be old and ugly.
The young girl we have been discussing is rather rebellious and think that her parents are her kill joys. She pouts, she sulks, she hides things from her family and think they do not want her to be happy. Despite all their wealth and success, she is not a happy nor contented person. I am surprised that she likes Elizabeth and wants to spend time with my daughter. Interestingly both mother and daughter agree about Elizabeth. Both like and trust Elizabeth.
I certainly hope that in going to another country, the difficulty in adjusting will turn out to be a blessing for this young girl. Maturity will find her faster in the midst of change. May she become self-assured in the process. Adjustment can bind the family closer together. Difficulties breed character. May she find her centre in the new world and be happy and contented.
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
(517) A Reluctant Queen by Joan Wolf
Being familiar with the book of Esther in the bible, I must say that this historical fiction is some what different from the biblical account. As the author puts it, it is "the love story of Esther".
The story was set in the city of Susa, where Mordecai worked in the King's treasury. Esther was his orphaned niece. After Queen Vashti was deposed, beautiful virgins were taken into the palace to be prepared as candidates to take her place. Out of many formidable rivals, Esther was chosen as the new Queen. Meanwhile, Haman (the Jews' enemy) was plotting to annihilate the Jews. Esther courageously went before the King to plead for her people. The Jews were saved and Haman was executed.
This book provided a glimpse into the daily life in the palace that one cannot get from reading the scripture. I find it entirely believable that Esther did fall in love with her royal husband. And it is certain that she won the favour of her husband. I know it was probably naive to believe that a great King can be satisfied with bedding one woman exclusively. But it is wonderful to believe love does conquer all in some cases.
I like the chapters devoted to the less formal life the royal family spent in the summer hill resort. In that setting, I see the warring and conquering abilities of the victorious race. Without the horses, they would not be controlling such a great empire stretching from India to Ethiopia.
After conquering many nations and taking captives, the city of Susa must have been a most cosmopolitan place. Seeing that Mordecai was placed in a literate position in the treasury, this government obviously utilized the many talents of their captives.
Another interesting fact is that the conquering race counted the blood line from the father side. But the Jews counted it from the mother side. If Esther's mother did not marry her husband who was not a Jew, there would be no Queen Esther. (And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.) It is obvious that Esther is the one called to save her race.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
The story was set in the city of Susa, where Mordecai worked in the King's treasury. Esther was his orphaned niece. After Queen Vashti was deposed, beautiful virgins were taken into the palace to be prepared as candidates to take her place. Out of many formidable rivals, Esther was chosen as the new Queen. Meanwhile, Haman (the Jews' enemy) was plotting to annihilate the Jews. Esther courageously went before the King to plead for her people. The Jews were saved and Haman was executed.
This book provided a glimpse into the daily life in the palace that one cannot get from reading the scripture. I find it entirely believable that Esther did fall in love with her royal husband. And it is certain that she won the favour of her husband. I know it was probably naive to believe that a great King can be satisfied with bedding one woman exclusively. But it is wonderful to believe love does conquer all in some cases.
I like the chapters devoted to the less formal life the royal family spent in the summer hill resort. In that setting, I see the warring and conquering abilities of the victorious race. Without the horses, they would not be controlling such a great empire stretching from India to Ethiopia.
After conquering many nations and taking captives, the city of Susa must have been a most cosmopolitan place. Seeing that Mordecai was placed in a literate position in the treasury, this government obviously utilized the many talents of their captives.
Another interesting fact is that the conquering race counted the blood line from the father side. But the Jews counted it from the mother side. If Esther's mother did not marry her husband who was not a Jew, there would be no Queen Esther. (And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.) It is obvious that Esther is the one called to save her race.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
(516) Outcasts United by Warren St. John
Quoting the author: "it's the story of a soccer team for young refugees, of the remarkable woman who founded that team, and of the town where these people came together."
It is also remarkable that a successful reporter would pull up stake from New York city to relocate to Clarkston, Georgia to write this story. Until I read this book, I have never thought about where all the refugees go to after they enter the United States. In just one team of soccer players, we have boys from Sudan, Congo, Kosovo, Gambia, Burundi, Afghanistan, Liberia, Bosnia, and Iraq.
The first thing that Elizabeth thought about was sending a small sum to support such a meaningful enterprise. I have noted the film deal and the commercial support as well as financial support from a National newspaper. I am glad that Luma, Tracy and the Fugees players do not have to struggle on their own anymore in a land of plenty.
For my daughter who hardly follow the different conflicts around the world, this book opened her eyes. She particularly likes the fact that the author did not assume every reader would know what happened when in those war torn countries, he just explained enough so that readers like Elizabeth would get enough back ground information to appreciate what was being related.
Like those who voluntarily and continue to work with the refugees in Georgia, my family and I have experienced the gracious generous ways of dirt poor subsisting farmers in Thailand and Borneo. Folks in my present church continue to work with the poor and the marginalized in Myanmar. There is something refreshing about those who are untouched by the unrelenting materialism in modern society.
It is also remarkable that a successful reporter would pull up stake from New York city to relocate to Clarkston, Georgia to write this story. Until I read this book, I have never thought about where all the refugees go to after they enter the United States. In just one team of soccer players, we have boys from Sudan, Congo, Kosovo, Gambia, Burundi, Afghanistan, Liberia, Bosnia, and Iraq.
The first thing that Elizabeth thought about was sending a small sum to support such a meaningful enterprise. I have noted the film deal and the commercial support as well as financial support from a National newspaper. I am glad that Luma, Tracy and the Fugees players do not have to struggle on their own anymore in a land of plenty.
For my daughter who hardly follow the different conflicts around the world, this book opened her eyes. She particularly likes the fact that the author did not assume every reader would know what happened when in those war torn countries, he just explained enough so that readers like Elizabeth would get enough back ground information to appreciate what was being related.
Like those who voluntarily and continue to work with the refugees in Georgia, my family and I have experienced the gracious generous ways of dirt poor subsisting farmers in Thailand and Borneo. Folks in my present church continue to work with the poor and the marginalized in Myanmar. There is something refreshing about those who are untouched by the unrelenting materialism in modern society.
Sunday, August 7, 2011
(515) Satelite Imaging
Having access to digital TV, I enjoyed a program made possible by satelite imaging. It was like an aerial journey made for armchair travelers.
I actually watched one that shows me parts of South Africa which includes Johansburg. The journey started from the east coast, transverse to the west and ended at a spectacular mountain range. For the first time I have a close look at what an old diamond mine was left to look like.
Then I really like the one on New York state which ended with a grand view of the Niagara Falls. I was treated to the beautiful scenery of the acres and acres of forest preserve in New York state. Those lakes, big and small, are just so serene and peaceful to look at.
There was one that shows those expensive and exclusive get away towns like Martha's Vineyard. There were many islands, seaside quaint little towns, famous names like the Kennedy's home base. Massachusetts may be small, but the Atlantic side certainly seems like it was millionaires' playground.
No wonder one of my friends said she rather watch one of these programs from the comforts of home than to take long flights to be there!
I actually watched one that shows me parts of South Africa which includes Johansburg. The journey started from the east coast, transverse to the west and ended at a spectacular mountain range. For the first time I have a close look at what an old diamond mine was left to look like.
Then I really like the one on New York state which ended with a grand view of the Niagara Falls. I was treated to the beautiful scenery of the acres and acres of forest preserve in New York state. Those lakes, big and small, are just so serene and peaceful to look at.
There was one that shows those expensive and exclusive get away towns like Martha's Vineyard. There were many islands, seaside quaint little towns, famous names like the Kennedy's home base. Massachusetts may be small, but the Atlantic side certainly seems like it was millionaires' playground.
No wonder one of my friends said she rather watch one of these programs from the comforts of home than to take long flights to be there!
(514) Politeness
I have an old school friend who often gives expensive treats to Elizabeth and I. Being a conscientious mom, I would make sure Elizabeth sends appreciative notes after the events.
One day, I was in her palatial home. She received a sweet thank you note from her friend who came for lunch just an hour ago. I have noted that the lady in question came with a little something in hand too. To me, it was really good manners. But to my friend, she would rather those whom she sees regularly not follow Miss Manners to the dot. She reasons it this way, she merely cooks a little more and have some delightful company to share it with. It was a win-win situation and nobody loses.
After analyzing it, I realised that my friend's husband is in business. Her friend's husband is a banker. Could it be that the banker's wife is being circumspect and not wanting to owe any favours. Otherwise, it would be hard for her husband to turn down a loan application from my friend's husband.
One day, I was in her palatial home. She received a sweet thank you note from her friend who came for lunch just an hour ago. I have noted that the lady in question came with a little something in hand too. To me, it was really good manners. But to my friend, she would rather those whom she sees regularly not follow Miss Manners to the dot. She reasons it this way, she merely cooks a little more and have some delightful company to share it with. It was a win-win situation and nobody loses.
After analyzing it, I realised that my friend's husband is in business. Her friend's husband is a banker. Could it be that the banker's wife is being circumspect and not wanting to owe any favours. Otherwise, it would be hard for her husband to turn down a loan application from my friend's husband.
(513) Happily ever after?
I have been hibernating in my brother's house for many days. Just yesterday I heard my mum talking on the phone with her old friend who was her co workers from her early twenties. Now I know from whom I have inherited my listening skills.
It was a kind of one-sided conversation. Apparently my mum's friend was lonely and needed sympathy. Her husband left her alone in their house. He went on one of his many do-good trips to Thailand. Why was it that a healthy and active old lady not follow her husband there? Oh! He seemed to walk too fast and each time she was left behind, she was terrified of being lost in a foreign country. When she complained about it, her children told her not to go with him unless there is another person who would wait for her.
We are talking about a couple who have celebrated their golden anniversary. I wonder if there are any really happily married couple who are both above seventy years old in town? I have met a few in America. Lately, I haven't come across any in this mega city.
It was a kind of one-sided conversation. Apparently my mum's friend was lonely and needed sympathy. Her husband left her alone in their house. He went on one of his many do-good trips to Thailand. Why was it that a healthy and active old lady not follow her husband there? Oh! He seemed to walk too fast and each time she was left behind, she was terrified of being lost in a foreign country. When she complained about it, her children told her not to go with him unless there is another person who would wait for her.
We are talking about a couple who have celebrated their golden anniversary. I wonder if there are any really happily married couple who are both above seventy years old in town? I have met a few in America. Lately, I haven't come across any in this mega city.
(512) Collectors?
I have a cousin who collects guitars. My husband asked how many guitars does he own? His answer was interesting: "Officially twenty three." Apparently he invariably kept that number at home but keeps the rest away from his wife's eyes.
My girl friend collects shoes. At last count she has sixty three pairs. Another collects hand bags. At her death, there were forty five. A third one collects books. She owns a few thousands stored safely in boxes with moth balls in her spare room.
My husband's friend is a geek. He kept buying the latest gadgets. In order to find room for the new items, he gave away the not so old ones to brothers, sisters, nephews and nieces. I suppose it is better than gambling or taking drugs. But one can imagine the thousands he spent chasing after the latest technology. It is just as well that he has a high income.
Here I want to bring in a New York celebrity chef: Marc Samuelsson. He was born and orphaned in Ethiopia. His sister and him were adopted and brought up in Sweden. His adoptive parents obviously spent their hard earned money transforming these two orphans' lives. I wonder if they still find the time and money to collect items. No, don't get me wrong! I am not really against collecting beautiful and meaningful items. I am merely pointing out that those with great resources are responsible for the wise disposal of it.
My girl friend collects shoes. At last count she has sixty three pairs. Another collects hand bags. At her death, there were forty five. A third one collects books. She owns a few thousands stored safely in boxes with moth balls in her spare room.
My husband's friend is a geek. He kept buying the latest gadgets. In order to find room for the new items, he gave away the not so old ones to brothers, sisters, nephews and nieces. I suppose it is better than gambling or taking drugs. But one can imagine the thousands he spent chasing after the latest technology. It is just as well that he has a high income.
Here I want to bring in a New York celebrity chef: Marc Samuelsson. He was born and orphaned in Ethiopia. His sister and him were adopted and brought up in Sweden. His adoptive parents obviously spent their hard earned money transforming these two orphans' lives. I wonder if they still find the time and money to collect items. No, don't get me wrong! I am not really against collecting beautiful and meaningful items. I am merely pointing out that those with great resources are responsible for the wise disposal of it.
(511) Stowaway by Karen Hesse
It took me many weeks to wade through a journal-like book. I can't say it is badly written. The only thing is that it makes tedious reading. Yet I am not willing to let it go as I know I am learning new facts about sailing round the world centuries ago.
I am amazed that the author actually accessed journals kept by sea captain and naturalist in order to gather materials to write a fictional account of the journey through the eyes of a stowaway. I may be willing to struggle through hundreds of pages to learn new facts, but I have no great love for the sea. And I won't dream of going through reams of decaying documents to sieve through historical data.
If you are interested to find out how it is like to be on Captain Cook's first journey which he discovered Australia, this is a good book to read. It was a by gone age where a boy in his early teen could be signed on to work on such a ship. Many able body sea men died of tropical diseases while Nicholas Young lived to join Joseph Banks on a journey to Iceland.
I am amazed that the author actually accessed journals kept by sea captain and naturalist in order to gather materials to write a fictional account of the journey through the eyes of a stowaway. I may be willing to struggle through hundreds of pages to learn new facts, but I have no great love for the sea. And I won't dream of going through reams of decaying documents to sieve through historical data.
If you are interested to find out how it is like to be on Captain Cook's first journey which he discovered Australia, this is a good book to read. It was a by gone age where a boy in his early teen could be signed on to work on such a ship. Many able body sea men died of tropical diseases while Nicholas Young lived to join Joseph Banks on a journey to Iceland.
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
(510) Crime Zero by Michael Cordy
This is a book that I read quite a number of years ago. I read it again the last few days and found that I have actually forgotten everything in it except the scene that we found thirteen nude bodies of teenagers preserved in aquariums filled with formalin.
With genetic therapy at a very advanced state now, it is possible that there is technology here today to do what was claimed in the book. Suppose if there are experts with sufficient finance, I can see in my mind's eye that a pathogen could be released in major airports through the air filters targeted at any group predetermined by the designer.
It is one thing to test gene therapy on death row convicts that bring them to death sooner. It is another to kill off all adult male universally within three years. This idea brought to mind one of the countries described in Journey to the West: a country made up of females only. The only difference between the two books is: in Crime Zero, boys before puberty would be allowed to live and pass on their modified genes to their offspring.
It seems that we are too clever by half. A lone gun man who may be insane could massacre between sixty to seventy people within an afternoon. Sorry I did not keep up to date with the much revised number of casualty in Norway. Our fire power far out stripped our security and justice systems. I simply cannot equate that number of lives to no death penalty and a maximum of 21 years in jail, really I don't care if some psychiatrists diagnose him as insane. Suppose if those countries with such technology do not find a way to safe guard the use, then a few key individuals could be the cause of millions of deaths.
With genetic therapy at a very advanced state now, it is possible that there is technology here today to do what was claimed in the book. Suppose if there are experts with sufficient finance, I can see in my mind's eye that a pathogen could be released in major airports through the air filters targeted at any group predetermined by the designer.
It is one thing to test gene therapy on death row convicts that bring them to death sooner. It is another to kill off all adult male universally within three years. This idea brought to mind one of the countries described in Journey to the West: a country made up of females only. The only difference between the two books is: in Crime Zero, boys before puberty would be allowed to live and pass on their modified genes to their offspring.
It seems that we are too clever by half. A lone gun man who may be insane could massacre between sixty to seventy people within an afternoon. Sorry I did not keep up to date with the much revised number of casualty in Norway. Our fire power far out stripped our security and justice systems. I simply cannot equate that number of lives to no death penalty and a maximum of 21 years in jail, really I don't care if some psychiatrists diagnose him as insane. Suppose if those countries with such technology do not find a way to safe guard the use, then a few key individuals could be the cause of millions of deaths.
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
(509) The witness for Prosecution by Agatha Christie
This book is made up of eleven short stories. I have read the last five stories in other collections.
The first story is used as the name of this book. A weak-will man who was low in financial water was arrested for murder. He told his solicitor that his live-in partner would give him an alibi. But the lady in question denied it. She in fact took the trouble to put up a convincing show to force the jury and all in court to wrestle out a reluctant admission out of her that he came home at the time he claimed. As a result he got off.
The Red Signal explores the field of premonition and insanity. It is not unheard of that some could sense some danger ahead and thus could escape unscathed. For the uninitiated, it may not be easy to pick up a cunning insane mind. Fortunately, the insane person killed himself in the struggle. His wife finally could go to the deceased's good friend.
In The Fourth Man, we find a lawyer, a canon, a mental specialist and a man who grew up in the same home as a woman who was found with multiple personalities. It was through the fourth person's special knowledge that the other three could guess at what actually happened to lead the woman in question to strangle herself to death.
In S.O.S. a chanced visitor to an isolated cottage was an answered prayer to an adopted daughter of the family. A murder was planned to the last detail to kill off the target so that the biological daughter could claim an inheritance. Indeed the love of money could lead to evil.
Where There is a Will is a story of how a young man plotted and planned his way out of a huge fortune. Should he be able to leave the old lady alone, she could have died within a short time. It was ironic that one who set a trap did fall into it himself.
I find it difficult to believe The Mystery of the Blue Jar could be a true story. But with a beautiful girl and a cunning "mental specialist", I suppose anything is possible.
In Sing a Song of Sixpence, we have a retired lawyer used his experience to solve a murder. The answer is tied to a new coin that was mentioned by one of the witnesses.
We have The Mystery of the Spanish Shawl in which a young man was ripped of everything in his apartment.
In Philomel Cottage a woman was able to save her own life from being taken by her husband, a serial killer.
In Accident, someone who was able to recognise a repeat killer was killed in trying to prevent a further murder. Or so he thought! In fact the murderess did not want to kill her husband but had to kill again to prevent her identity from being uncovered.
The Second Gong was rewritten into a longer story: A Mirror cracked from Side to Side.
The first story is used as the name of this book. A weak-will man who was low in financial water was arrested for murder. He told his solicitor that his live-in partner would give him an alibi. But the lady in question denied it. She in fact took the trouble to put up a convincing show to force the jury and all in court to wrestle out a reluctant admission out of her that he came home at the time he claimed. As a result he got off.
The Red Signal explores the field of premonition and insanity. It is not unheard of that some could sense some danger ahead and thus could escape unscathed. For the uninitiated, it may not be easy to pick up a cunning insane mind. Fortunately, the insane person killed himself in the struggle. His wife finally could go to the deceased's good friend.
In The Fourth Man, we find a lawyer, a canon, a mental specialist and a man who grew up in the same home as a woman who was found with multiple personalities. It was through the fourth person's special knowledge that the other three could guess at what actually happened to lead the woman in question to strangle herself to death.
In S.O.S. a chanced visitor to an isolated cottage was an answered prayer to an adopted daughter of the family. A murder was planned to the last detail to kill off the target so that the biological daughter could claim an inheritance. Indeed the love of money could lead to evil.
Where There is a Will is a story of how a young man plotted and planned his way out of a huge fortune. Should he be able to leave the old lady alone, she could have died within a short time. It was ironic that one who set a trap did fall into it himself.
I find it difficult to believe The Mystery of the Blue Jar could be a true story. But with a beautiful girl and a cunning "mental specialist", I suppose anything is possible.
In Sing a Song of Sixpence, we have a retired lawyer used his experience to solve a murder. The answer is tied to a new coin that was mentioned by one of the witnesses.
We have The Mystery of the Spanish Shawl in which a young man was ripped of everything in his apartment.
In Philomel Cottage a woman was able to save her own life from being taken by her husband, a serial killer.
In Accident, someone who was able to recognise a repeat killer was killed in trying to prevent a further murder. Or so he thought! In fact the murderess did not want to kill her husband but had to kill again to prevent her identity from being uncovered.
The Second Gong was rewritten into a longer story: A Mirror cracked from Side to Side.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
(508) Packing for a trip
I visited two sisters. The elder has a college age daughter. After the daughter took out clothes for a trip, her mother has to pack it for the journey.
The younger sister has a seven year old son. During the last school holidays, he went with his Sunday School teacher and a few classmates to visit a daughter church in another state. While relating how a child has to learn skills, I encouraged the younger sister to start training her son to learn to make lists and to pack his things with the mother's help.
From my own experience, seven is a good age to start. First let the child be present and witness how things are gathered and packed. The second time around, hand a list to let him gather what he would need. Then pack them into the bag or case, depending how much the child wants to do. Gradually, the child does more, and the parent less. Finally, the parent should make sure the list is complete and perhaps view the case before it is closed and then locked.
By the time a child is about twelve, he or she should be capable enough to independently pack for a school trip or a youth camp lasting a few days.
The younger sister has a seven year old son. During the last school holidays, he went with his Sunday School teacher and a few classmates to visit a daughter church in another state. While relating how a child has to learn skills, I encouraged the younger sister to start training her son to learn to make lists and to pack his things with the mother's help.
From my own experience, seven is a good age to start. First let the child be present and witness how things are gathered and packed. The second time around, hand a list to let him gather what he would need. Then pack them into the bag or case, depending how much the child wants to do. Gradually, the child does more, and the parent less. Finally, the parent should make sure the list is complete and perhaps view the case before it is closed and then locked.
By the time a child is about twelve, he or she should be capable enough to independently pack for a school trip or a youth camp lasting a few days.
(507) Gun man
Here I am, sitting in front of the TV. Instead of typing straight into Blogspot, I am writing long hand.
My sibling and family went for a vacation. I am house sitting, making sure my mother is not alone. When I heard from CNN that a bomb detonated in Oslo, my heart skipped a beat. It was a good thing that on that day they were in another European country. As soon as I figured that out, I thanked God and said a prayer committing their safety to God. My mum agreed with me in prayer. Who would have expected such wholesale bloodletting in a Scandinavian country? On satelite TV, they claimed at least 80 deaths in that summer camp of the youth wing of the ruling party.
The poor, unfortunate parents of those youth who were shot at by a lone gun man wearing police uniform! May the murderer be caught soon. Please let the injured be safe. It is tragic that so many young lives were snuffed prematurely in one afternoon!
My sibling and family went for a vacation. I am house sitting, making sure my mother is not alone. When I heard from CNN that a bomb detonated in Oslo, my heart skipped a beat. It was a good thing that on that day they were in another European country. As soon as I figured that out, I thanked God and said a prayer committing their safety to God. My mum agreed with me in prayer. Who would have expected such wholesale bloodletting in a Scandinavian country? On satelite TV, they claimed at least 80 deaths in that summer camp of the youth wing of the ruling party.
The poor, unfortunate parents of those youth who were shot at by a lone gun man wearing police uniform! May the murderer be caught soon. Please let the injured be safe. It is tragic that so many young lives were snuffed prematurely in one afternoon!
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
(506) a Twist in the Tale by Jeffrey Archer
This book reminds me about Tales of the Unexpected by Roald Dahl. The interesting part is that ten of the twelve tales were true!
The Perfect Murder
My grandma used to say that adulterers have higher chances than an average person to be murdered. This story amply illustrated her theory. It is quite unexpected that a married man would expect his mistress to be faithful to him. But I suppose it does not take a lot for a man to kill a woman, especially in a moment of rage. Elizabeth and I both wondered aloud if it was a true story. We hope not. It would be unfair for a real murderer to escape scot free in this world. But surely he could not escape from the Higher Judge.
Clean Sweep Ignatius
My palm sweated when I read of the bank manager being threatened by a hand gun. Surely the confidentiality of banking would not be carried to such extreme! Yet without such bank secret accounts, we would not have such poor countries like Indonesia with lots of natural resources. It is difficult to find men with political power who are not corrupt. Where we find such men, we would find a nation that is beyond riches, like Singapore.
A La Carte
Would not teenagers think their parents old fashion or crazy to be ambitious for them? I wonder when was the turning point for the young man in the story? At the moment when he turned around to walk back to the hotel? Elizabeth's counseling teacher said that she practically had to nag her son to apply for the first scholarship. Finally she had to apply on his behalf and did everything for him. The earlier ones he did not win. The one that enabled him to back pack in Europe last summer was the one that his mum applied for against his wishes.
Elizabeth have obtained a place in my old college with 60% aid. However, she did not win the American Chamber of Commerce scholarship. Unless a miracle occurs, she will go to a local government university near where we live. Alternatively, we are still waiting to see if she is on the waiting list of a University in China. So far, no news could be good news.
Not the Real Thing
This is an unlikely story of how a vain man lost his costly and beautiful medal. It is futile for a commoner to try his best to appear lordly in front of a Monarch. Does a medal awarded to a person belongs to him or the monarch?
Just Good Friends
I was fooled until the last moment when the author finally mentioned about the female's tail. It was natural to assume that this pub customer picked up a homeless female who part timed for the pub owner.
The Steal
I have met a few couples like the Kendall-Humes, rich, loud, confident, generous to a fault ... Personally I prefer them to strait laced old money folks. Unwittingly, they have paid four times the real price for their inferior carpet. And the Rogers had gotten their "steal". They paid five hundred for something worth five thousand. I suppose every party wins. The carpet dealer made excellent profit even though he practically gave one away to the Rogers. The Kendall-Humes thought they made a fantastic bargain. And the Rogers knew they had a bargain.
Colonel Bullfrog
It was amazing to have the Japanese rose from the ashes and the humiliation of the Second World War to become an industrial power. By a series of co-incidences, it would not be too far fetched to imagine this being a true story.
Checkmate
Perhaps the pickings were lean in other places. It was unusual that a lady in the trade would choose to pick her fool in a chess competition. She must have learned her skills in chess since childhood. She must be quite good to able to pretend to lose convincingly so many times with a chess president.
Honour among Thieves
I find it difficult to believe a person can tell a vintage by vineyard and year. They exist, I am sure. Barker did not lose any money over losing the bet. He had two good meals and some excellent wines in the bargain. The only thing that would pierce his side constantly would be that fool Hamilton laughing at him over his "inability to name the wines" from Hamilton's cellar. But I suppose Barker has the last laugh.
A Chapter of Accidents
If this is a true story, I find it ironic that Travers suffered a nasty accident for only making a pass at a lady. Of course he had it coming to him, for bedding many women in town behind their husbands' backs. Take heed: "Any intended victim who has a regular routine immediately makes himself more vulnerable." (Conan Doyle)
The Loophole
I have never heard that a successful litigant need not pay tax at all on damages received in a civil case. Is that true in UK or USA? Philip who paid tax at the highest rate could expense off the loss because the person who sued him for libel once worked for him. I have not been able to figure out why he would not be able to do it otherwise.
Christina Rosenthal
The modern Romeo and Juliet! For parents who held to their beliefs that their children should not marry certain races, this is a warning! Not unless they would prefer untimely deaths rather than gain a son or daughter-in-law whom they do not accept.
The Perfect Murder
My grandma used to say that adulterers have higher chances than an average person to be murdered. This story amply illustrated her theory. It is quite unexpected that a married man would expect his mistress to be faithful to him. But I suppose it does not take a lot for a man to kill a woman, especially in a moment of rage. Elizabeth and I both wondered aloud if it was a true story. We hope not. It would be unfair for a real murderer to escape scot free in this world. But surely he could not escape from the Higher Judge.
Clean Sweep Ignatius
My palm sweated when I read of the bank manager being threatened by a hand gun. Surely the confidentiality of banking would not be carried to such extreme! Yet without such bank secret accounts, we would not have such poor countries like Indonesia with lots of natural resources. It is difficult to find men with political power who are not corrupt. Where we find such men, we would find a nation that is beyond riches, like Singapore.
A La Carte
Would not teenagers think their parents old fashion or crazy to be ambitious for them? I wonder when was the turning point for the young man in the story? At the moment when he turned around to walk back to the hotel? Elizabeth's counseling teacher said that she practically had to nag her son to apply for the first scholarship. Finally she had to apply on his behalf and did everything for him. The earlier ones he did not win. The one that enabled him to back pack in Europe last summer was the one that his mum applied for against his wishes.
Elizabeth have obtained a place in my old college with 60% aid. However, she did not win the American Chamber of Commerce scholarship. Unless a miracle occurs, she will go to a local government university near where we live. Alternatively, we are still waiting to see if she is on the waiting list of a University in China. So far, no news could be good news.
Not the Real Thing
This is an unlikely story of how a vain man lost his costly and beautiful medal. It is futile for a commoner to try his best to appear lordly in front of a Monarch. Does a medal awarded to a person belongs to him or the monarch?
Just Good Friends
I was fooled until the last moment when the author finally mentioned about the female's tail. It was natural to assume that this pub customer picked up a homeless female who part timed for the pub owner.
The Steal
I have met a few couples like the Kendall-Humes, rich, loud, confident, generous to a fault ... Personally I prefer them to strait laced old money folks. Unwittingly, they have paid four times the real price for their inferior carpet. And the Rogers had gotten their "steal". They paid five hundred for something worth five thousand. I suppose every party wins. The carpet dealer made excellent profit even though he practically gave one away to the Rogers. The Kendall-Humes thought they made a fantastic bargain. And the Rogers knew they had a bargain.
Colonel Bullfrog
It was amazing to have the Japanese rose from the ashes and the humiliation of the Second World War to become an industrial power. By a series of co-incidences, it would not be too far fetched to imagine this being a true story.
Checkmate
Perhaps the pickings were lean in other places. It was unusual that a lady in the trade would choose to pick her fool in a chess competition. She must have learned her skills in chess since childhood. She must be quite good to able to pretend to lose convincingly so many times with a chess president.
Honour among Thieves
I find it difficult to believe a person can tell a vintage by vineyard and year. They exist, I am sure. Barker did not lose any money over losing the bet. He had two good meals and some excellent wines in the bargain. The only thing that would pierce his side constantly would be that fool Hamilton laughing at him over his "inability to name the wines" from Hamilton's cellar. But I suppose Barker has the last laugh.
A Chapter of Accidents
If this is a true story, I find it ironic that Travers suffered a nasty accident for only making a pass at a lady. Of course he had it coming to him, for bedding many women in town behind their husbands' backs. Take heed: "Any intended victim who has a regular routine immediately makes himself more vulnerable." (Conan Doyle)
The Loophole
I have never heard that a successful litigant need not pay tax at all on damages received in a civil case. Is that true in UK or USA? Philip who paid tax at the highest rate could expense off the loss because the person who sued him for libel once worked for him. I have not been able to figure out why he would not be able to do it otherwise.
Christina Rosenthal
The modern Romeo and Juliet! For parents who held to their beliefs that their children should not marry certain races, this is a warning! Not unless they would prefer untimely deaths rather than gain a son or daughter-in-law whom they do not accept.
Sunday, July 17, 2011
(505) Random Hearts by Warren Adler
Adler is an author of many books. It looks like the most well known is The War of Roses. Random Hearts is a motion picture.
In the story a married woman had an affair with a married man. They were both very careful and thought their spouses would not find out. Unfortunately their flight to a stolen holiday ended as a tragic wreck in the Potomic River. Since they were traveling under fictitious names, their bodies were kept for days before their identities were traced. Meanwhile, their respective faithful spouses suffered.
The book dealt in details how this man and woman reacted to their respective spouses' deceit. In the end, something good came out of the tragedy. They developed feelings for each other and decided to face the future as a couple.
Normally, a widow faced her grief at her husband's death. This particular widow was overwhelmed by her anger at being cheated for more than a year. Similarly, the widower had to deal with grief as well as anger. For him, it was worse. He found that his deceased wife chose to conceive a child with her lover. It really hurt him as she had refused to have a child with him for many years. The flip side of love is hate. The book ended as heroine decided to forgive the deceitful deceased male.
In the story a married woman had an affair with a married man. They were both very careful and thought their spouses would not find out. Unfortunately their flight to a stolen holiday ended as a tragic wreck in the Potomic River. Since they were traveling under fictitious names, their bodies were kept for days before their identities were traced. Meanwhile, their respective faithful spouses suffered.
The book dealt in details how this man and woman reacted to their respective spouses' deceit. In the end, something good came out of the tragedy. They developed feelings for each other and decided to face the future as a couple.
Normally, a widow faced her grief at her husband's death. This particular widow was overwhelmed by her anger at being cheated for more than a year. Similarly, the widower had to deal with grief as well as anger. For him, it was worse. He found that his deceased wife chose to conceive a child with her lover. It really hurt him as she had refused to have a child with him for many years. The flip side of love is hate. The book ended as heroine decided to forgive the deceitful deceased male.
Saturday, July 16, 2011
(504) Courtship
The other day I was watching a movie on cable TV. Since I was channel surfing when I hit the movie, I only watched about three quarters of it. Elizabeth and my mother joined me at the half way point. The main actress was very attractive. I really enjoyed seeing her in many outfits.
From the way the director was handling the movie, we saw the main actor pursuing the heroine. Yet at the end of the movie, the attractive actress revealed to her grandma that she had been eying the guy ever since she noticed him visiting his grandpa pretty often in her grandma's retirement home. She set about to plan to meet him seemingly by chance. Then she attracted him by some scheming and played hard to get after the incident. In the movie, he was caught and caught for all time. (If I see the movie again I will note the name to record here.)
When Elizabeth was in her good friend's house, a few teenagers and I talked about courtship. Elizabeth and I mentioned about this movie and the idea it put forward. Her friend, Vivien, agreed totally that nowadays guys are like that. It takes ingenuity to attract one desirable male and it takes more manipulation to catch him.
Thinking back, I was really fortunate that I did not need to scheme and manipulate. I had two direct proposals four years apart. I accepted the second one and got married. In between I know if had hung on longer I would have gotten another two proposals. The very first offer was from a man much older than I was. If I had accepted him I would have become the lady boss of a big Chinese Restaurant near the Rockies. Another likely contender was a Navy pilot. The third was a rich developer's son who held a Green Card to Canada. I am glad that I don't have to plot and scheme to catch my prince.
While I am still on the topic, I am tickled to mention a novel way to catch a boy : as in Meg Cabot's All American Girl. In the book we have Samantha Madison declaring on National TV that she would like the rumours about her and the First Son being an item to be true. That certainly beats rescuing the President from being shot at.
From the way the director was handling the movie, we saw the main actor pursuing the heroine. Yet at the end of the movie, the attractive actress revealed to her grandma that she had been eying the guy ever since she noticed him visiting his grandpa pretty often in her grandma's retirement home. She set about to plan to meet him seemingly by chance. Then she attracted him by some scheming and played hard to get after the incident. In the movie, he was caught and caught for all time. (If I see the movie again I will note the name to record here.)
When Elizabeth was in her good friend's house, a few teenagers and I talked about courtship. Elizabeth and I mentioned about this movie and the idea it put forward. Her friend, Vivien, agreed totally that nowadays guys are like that. It takes ingenuity to attract one desirable male and it takes more manipulation to catch him.
Thinking back, I was really fortunate that I did not need to scheme and manipulate. I had two direct proposals four years apart. I accepted the second one and got married. In between I know if had hung on longer I would have gotten another two proposals. The very first offer was from a man much older than I was. If I had accepted him I would have become the lady boss of a big Chinese Restaurant near the Rockies. Another likely contender was a Navy pilot. The third was a rich developer's son who held a Green Card to Canada. I am glad that I don't have to plot and scheme to catch my prince.
While I am still on the topic, I am tickled to mention a novel way to catch a boy : as in Meg Cabot's All American Girl. In the book we have Samantha Madison declaring on National TV that she would like the rumours about her and the First Son being an item to be true. That certainly beats rescuing the President from being shot at.
Friday, July 15, 2011
(503) The Capture by Kathryn Lasky
When I first saw this book, I thought I would just read a few pages and see if it is worth my time. Surprisingly, it is a captivating read. I learned many little facts about owls and birds in general.
It is the story of a undersized bird who would never be able to fly normally. She chose to use her disability for some noble purpose. In this case, she pretended to be an owlet and infiltrated into enemy camp to save eggs. In the end, she died as a heroine defending an egg she was rescuing through an eagle. Instead of being an odd single owl depending on other owls' charity for food, she became a role model in her country, Ambala. Her name, Hortense, became the most frequently used name in that land.
None of us are perfect. As pre-teens, most people have probably felt handicapped in one way or another. With such books published by Scholastic, no one needs to feel marginalized by any handicap, instead, we could rise above any handicap to be all that we can be, like Hortense.
It is the story of a undersized bird who would never be able to fly normally. She chose to use her disability for some noble purpose. In this case, she pretended to be an owlet and infiltrated into enemy camp to save eggs. In the end, she died as a heroine defending an egg she was rescuing through an eagle. Instead of being an odd single owl depending on other owls' charity for food, she became a role model in her country, Ambala. Her name, Hortense, became the most frequently used name in that land.
None of us are perfect. As pre-teens, most people have probably felt handicapped in one way or another. With such books published by Scholastic, no one needs to feel marginalized by any handicap, instead, we could rise above any handicap to be all that we can be, like Hortense.
(502) Holding on to the listener
On page 34 of Personality Plus we find Popular Sanguine as warm and physical people. "they frequently hold on to the people they are talking to in order to be in close contact and to make sure their audience doesn't get away.
Thank goodness Elizabeth does not have this trait! But in The Secret of Chimneys by Agatha Christie, we find "Lomax had the unpleasant habit of retaining a hold upon a person with whom he was engaged in serious conversation ... a firm grip of the the lapel of Lord Caterham's coat."
In real life I have come across my fair share of sanguine who talked fast and furious. So far I have not been a captive audience of a compulsive talker like Lomax yet.
Thank goodness Elizabeth does not have this trait! But in The Secret of Chimneys by Agatha Christie, we find "Lomax had the unpleasant habit of retaining a hold upon a person with whom he was engaged in serious conversation ... a firm grip of the the lapel of Lord Caterham's coat."
In real life I have come across my fair share of sanguine who talked fast and furious. So far I have not been a captive audience of a compulsive talker like Lomax yet.
Saturday, July 9, 2011
(501) Personality plus by Florence Littauer
Since I brought up the four basic personalities in my last blog, I thought I would share a little on this book. Some neighbours moved away from my neighbourhood. They threw away a box of books. Sad to say, I didn't hear of it until too late. The garbage collector took them. A maid, who is my friend, rescued two and gave them to me. One I donated to my church library. The other is the above-mentioned.
I heard about this basic four personality grouping from Elizabeth's Kindergarten teacher. When my eldest went to work, he bought a book by Tim LaHaye: I think it was Spirit filled Temperaments. I flipped through most of the pages over a few years but perhaps because I was dense, I could not appreciate it.
Elizabeth is very introspective. She read Spirit filled temperaments more than once to search into her own make up. As she was reading Personality Plus, she read me numerous sections. This time I could see how it applies into my life and how it seemed to be describing some of my close friends. I hope it will give me an insight into the people whom I am trying to understand. And it will give me ideas as to motivating them to draw on God's gracious healing provision. To a greater or lesser extent, most of us are wounded people. Most of us in the church need healing before we can be effective in our unique ministries.
I heard about this basic four personality grouping from Elizabeth's Kindergarten teacher. When my eldest went to work, he bought a book by Tim LaHaye: I think it was Spirit filled Temperaments. I flipped through most of the pages over a few years but perhaps because I was dense, I could not appreciate it.
Elizabeth is very introspective. She read Spirit filled temperaments more than once to search into her own make up. As she was reading Personality Plus, she read me numerous sections. This time I could see how it applies into my life and how it seemed to be describing some of my close friends. I hope it will give me an insight into the people whom I am trying to understand. And it will give me ideas as to motivating them to draw on God's gracious healing provision. To a greater or lesser extent, most of us are wounded people. Most of us in the church need healing before we can be effective in our unique ministries.
(500) Movies - happy endings?
Elizabeth ended her temporary work at the legal firm. As youth meeting was cancelled today, she has the rare opportunity to indulge herself in a movie marathon.
She emerged from in front of the TV and DVD player to gulp down her breakfast. Meanwhile, she complained about movies that ended sadly. For one, she would not pay for any movie that did not end happily. In reply, I told her that the Hollywoods of this world run on box office cash. If the majority of the paying audience demand a realistic ending to most movies, directors and producers would comply. After all, money makes the world go round.
Even though we talk of sanguine, choleric, phlegmatic and melancholic as 4 groups of personalities. In actual fact, I suspect that popular sanguine is well below one sixth of the population. We need lots of choleric, just like in a beehive we need thousands of worker bees. Elizabeth thinks she is more of a popular sanguine than a powerful choleric. She loves fairy tales and happy endings.
Looking back, I was probably a popular sanguine when I was a child. Since 18 I have deliberately decided to change. Now I am more of a phlegmatic looking on things happening from the fringe most of the time. In order to write, I guarded my time so that I have the peace and leisure to reflect in order to write down my thoughts and feelings. I need to learn to talk less, to listen and think more.
She emerged from in front of the TV and DVD player to gulp down her breakfast. Meanwhile, she complained about movies that ended sadly. For one, she would not pay for any movie that did not end happily. In reply, I told her that the Hollywoods of this world run on box office cash. If the majority of the paying audience demand a realistic ending to most movies, directors and producers would comply. After all, money makes the world go round.
Even though we talk of sanguine, choleric, phlegmatic and melancholic as 4 groups of personalities. In actual fact, I suspect that popular sanguine is well below one sixth of the population. We need lots of choleric, just like in a beehive we need thousands of worker bees. Elizabeth thinks she is more of a popular sanguine than a powerful choleric. She loves fairy tales and happy endings.
Looking back, I was probably a popular sanguine when I was a child. Since 18 I have deliberately decided to change. Now I am more of a phlegmatic looking on things happening from the fringe most of the time. In order to write, I guarded my time so that I have the peace and leisure to reflect in order to write down my thoughts and feelings. I need to learn to talk less, to listen and think more.
Thursday, July 7, 2011
(499) Hacking stones
In Brisingr by Christopher Paolini, we find a stone forest in Mount Thardur. (page 418) The ancestor that found the stone forest had his masons chisel out nearly fifty trees. "It has also become a tradition to send troublesome offspring here to chisel out a tree or two while under the supervision of a master mason."
We could benefit from this today with our youth who are angry. Unspent anger often find outlets that either harm others or the person himself. But not many have the opportunity to chop trees or chisel stones. Most of us who get angry could speed on the highway or bang our computer desk.
We still have games. But only those with good co-ordination play games on a regular basis. Modern civilization does have its limitations!
We could benefit from this today with our youth who are angry. Unspent anger often find outlets that either harm others or the person himself. But not many have the opportunity to chop trees or chisel stones. Most of us who get angry could speed on the highway or bang our computer desk.
We still have games. But only those with good co-ordination play games on a regular basis. Modern civilization does have its limitations!
(498) Upbringing 53
Some children are like wild horses. When my brother went to school, my mother actually brought a cane to present to his teacher in front of him. She wisely told the teacher that the cane was meant for hitting my brother's arms and legs should my brother show disrespect. The middle age teacher was smart enough to place her hand on my brother's shoulder and said that she would be honoured to keep it to punish other pupils. She said that she was sure my brother would prove to be her best student, and he did. My brother was fortunate to be given an expert rider who knew how to break him in gently.
When Elizabeth went to school, she had some problems with the discipline of sitting for hours listening. When she was having disturbed sleep and dreaded going to school, I knew it was time to visit the class teacher. Remember that period of time I was visiting the public library at least once a week? I located a small volume of old folk tales and poems in the national language. Since it was out of print, I made two copies of it before returning. I brought one copy as a gift to Elizabeth's class. I must have a likely reason to visit without seeming to complain or spy. I know she would welcome the book because earlier she had copied a similar poem on the board as an exercise for the class to work on.
After presenting the copy, I told her how much I appreciate her effort in teaching my daughter literature at such a young age. Then I casually asked her if Elizabeth had been difficult or disobedient. She told me candidly that she really likes to teach my daughter as she is very quick to grasp concepts. Since Elizabeth is fast in finishing her work, she placed the girl next to a slower child to be helped. However, some times Elizabeth would stare at the teacher in a hostile manner. Since we are in Asia, the teacher wants to teach my child to look down instead of challenging an elder. Immediately I saw the problem.
The few nights after the visit, I enlisted the help of my older children. My bed time stories all involved a young maid meeting a King, a princess, a witch and a Premier. With my plots involving the actions of an untrained maid of tender years, and the reactions of the powers that be. The stories illustrates the terrible things that could happen to the young girl should there be no one to intervene. The persons to help the girl could be the Chamberlain, a lady in waiting, the black cat or an adviser. I remember Michael asking the right questions at the right points, and Keziah guessing the outcomes quite correctly. And we all awaited Elizabeth to state the moral of the fairy tale. By the fourth night she could tell me that it is not smart of her to look defiantly at her teacher, even if her teacher had been unfair in punishing her class. She could agree with me that at the tense moments, it is more prudent to look down and escape the wrath that would pass.
This stage of teaching took a few months, I did not push too hard. All in, I visited about four times. I learned to appreciate the commitment of this Grade One teacher. She had come to regard me as a friend. I am glad to say that from that point on, Elizabeth was quite a delight to her many teachers. She was particularly loved after we moved back to the capital, where the children of the upwardly mobile and brash new-wealth parents pale in comparison. Somehow a respectful spirit and humility in heart outshone any intellect, gifts, athletic prowess and leadership qualities.
When Elizabeth went to school, she had some problems with the discipline of sitting for hours listening. When she was having disturbed sleep and dreaded going to school, I knew it was time to visit the class teacher. Remember that period of time I was visiting the public library at least once a week? I located a small volume of old folk tales and poems in the national language. Since it was out of print, I made two copies of it before returning. I brought one copy as a gift to Elizabeth's class. I must have a likely reason to visit without seeming to complain or spy. I know she would welcome the book because earlier she had copied a similar poem on the board as an exercise for the class to work on.
After presenting the copy, I told her how much I appreciate her effort in teaching my daughter literature at such a young age. Then I casually asked her if Elizabeth had been difficult or disobedient. She told me candidly that she really likes to teach my daughter as she is very quick to grasp concepts. Since Elizabeth is fast in finishing her work, she placed the girl next to a slower child to be helped. However, some times Elizabeth would stare at the teacher in a hostile manner. Since we are in Asia, the teacher wants to teach my child to look down instead of challenging an elder. Immediately I saw the problem.
The few nights after the visit, I enlisted the help of my older children. My bed time stories all involved a young maid meeting a King, a princess, a witch and a Premier. With my plots involving the actions of an untrained maid of tender years, and the reactions of the powers that be. The stories illustrates the terrible things that could happen to the young girl should there be no one to intervene. The persons to help the girl could be the Chamberlain, a lady in waiting, the black cat or an adviser. I remember Michael asking the right questions at the right points, and Keziah guessing the outcomes quite correctly. And we all awaited Elizabeth to state the moral of the fairy tale. By the fourth night she could tell me that it is not smart of her to look defiantly at her teacher, even if her teacher had been unfair in punishing her class. She could agree with me that at the tense moments, it is more prudent to look down and escape the wrath that would pass.
This stage of teaching took a few months, I did not push too hard. All in, I visited about four times. I learned to appreciate the commitment of this Grade One teacher. She had come to regard me as a friend. I am glad to say that from that point on, Elizabeth was quite a delight to her many teachers. She was particularly loved after we moved back to the capital, where the children of the upwardly mobile and brash new-wealth parents pale in comparison. Somehow a respectful spirit and humility in heart outshone any intellect, gifts, athletic prowess and leadership qualities.
(497) Upbringing 52
Now that all my children are safely out of the school system, I finally can say my piece!
It is not unusual to read of a parent slapping or assaulting his or her child's teacher in the newspaper. Even if the teacher concerned has done the unforgivable, it is still wrong for any parent to touch the child's teacher. Such an act would destroy the child.
Let me bring up an instance:
A close friend of mine sent her children to a Chinese medium primary school. Such schools are well known for strict discipline. My friend's husband is well to do. He is a busy and important man. She is busy in her own right over a lot of concerns that may not help either of her children. Both children are disorganized. No one teach them to pack bags or how to keep track of important documents. One day he lost his fund raising card for the Scouts. Much as the house hold searched, it was not found. Perhaps it was really eaten by the puppy. This poor boy was called up at assembly and humiliated in front of the whole school. He came home crying, I think he was barely eight years old.
His father heard of it and went to school to complain about the inhuman punishment. The entire affair ended up with him endowing the school with quite big sum of donation. But the damage was done. Some teachers made it a point to pick on the son as someone not to be trusted. Others pointedly ignored him as they saw that the father was trying to bribe them. A few would be artificially sweet to him whenever it was school fund raising time as such schools need donations from well wishers and were not fully government funded.
A few years later, the parents had to pull both children out to place them in a private school. Both children developed very defensive attitudes and were difficult to teach. The boy was depressed by the jealousy of peers and angered by the treatment of his teachers.
In retrospect, a girl in Keziah's school lost her card, the girl's mother went to school to see the class teacher and apologised. They were fined less than a hundred dollars and the matter was settled. While a boy in Michael's school lost his card, he was required to make a police report. He was grilled in the Assistant Principle's room and he parted with what he remembered he had collected. Both these schools teach in the National language. Hence the difference in culture in student treatment.
It is not unusual to read of a parent slapping or assaulting his or her child's teacher in the newspaper. Even if the teacher concerned has done the unforgivable, it is still wrong for any parent to touch the child's teacher. Such an act would destroy the child.
Let me bring up an instance:
A close friend of mine sent her children to a Chinese medium primary school. Such schools are well known for strict discipline. My friend's husband is well to do. He is a busy and important man. She is busy in her own right over a lot of concerns that may not help either of her children. Both children are disorganized. No one teach them to pack bags or how to keep track of important documents. One day he lost his fund raising card for the Scouts. Much as the house hold searched, it was not found. Perhaps it was really eaten by the puppy. This poor boy was called up at assembly and humiliated in front of the whole school. He came home crying, I think he was barely eight years old.
His father heard of it and went to school to complain about the inhuman punishment. The entire affair ended up with him endowing the school with quite big sum of donation. But the damage was done. Some teachers made it a point to pick on the son as someone not to be trusted. Others pointedly ignored him as they saw that the father was trying to bribe them. A few would be artificially sweet to him whenever it was school fund raising time as such schools need donations from well wishers and were not fully government funded.
A few years later, the parents had to pull both children out to place them in a private school. Both children developed very defensive attitudes and were difficult to teach. The boy was depressed by the jealousy of peers and angered by the treatment of his teachers.
In retrospect, a girl in Keziah's school lost her card, the girl's mother went to school to see the class teacher and apologised. They were fined less than a hundred dollars and the matter was settled. While a boy in Michael's school lost his card, he was required to make a police report. He was grilled in the Assistant Principle's room and he parted with what he remembered he had collected. Both these schools teach in the National language. Hence the difference in culture in student treatment.
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
(496) Language Learning
Although I had English classes in Elementary school, my English vocabulary was far less than 500 at age 13. How did I know that? It was because I borrowed a Enid Blyton Blue Dragon book from a classmate but could not understand it.
Many people found it difficult to believe that English was my weakest language for many years. I really worked long and hard at improving it. Lately I have been spending time watching documentaries to improve my pronunciation.
I used to carry a little pocket diary everywhere I went. In the diary I recorded every new English word I come across. Whenever I have any free time, I would check my small English-Chinese dictionary and record the meaning. If I happened to have friends with me who can help me, I would ask them how to pronounce the new word. Once I caught the pronunciation, I would say it ten times and then write it down in my own phonetic symbols. While waiting for buses, I would be reading this and committing everything to memory.
Every week I make myself read one English book. If that week was after exam, it would be a thicker book. Otherwise I would choose a thin simplified volume. Even if for whatever reason I missed reading a book, I would make up during the school holidays.
On Sunday I force myself to go through the Editor's commentary. It was laborious! First I read through the entire article, underlining words I have not learned. Next I would check for the meanings and write it next to the word as well as add it to my pocket diary. Then I would go through the article with the meanings in mind. Last of all, I would read the article aloud.
My uncle in China sent a small transistor radio when my grandma visited him. Every night at eleven o'clock I would listen to one hour of The Voice of America broadcast in bed. That tiny radio served me well for about three years. During the holidays I would tune to BBC or the Australia Broadcasting Corporation. My family was too poor to own a TV until my eldest sibling went out to work. Till this day I am not good at catching conversations in movies. I prefer to watch movies with subtitle in another language.
In school I would cultivate friends who would speak to me in English. I particularly appreciate Indian friends who speak English at home. They are good in English and most willing to help me.
From the age 14 to 18 I kept diaries. The earlier pages in my first diary were almost entirely in Chinese. By the time I hit 17, most of everything written was in English except a word here and there that I could not think of an English equivalent.
So you can see, my abilities are hard earned. It seemed worthwhile now as I can definitely reach a wider readership in English than Chinese.
Many people found it difficult to believe that English was my weakest language for many years. I really worked long and hard at improving it. Lately I have been spending time watching documentaries to improve my pronunciation.
I used to carry a little pocket diary everywhere I went. In the diary I recorded every new English word I come across. Whenever I have any free time, I would check my small English-Chinese dictionary and record the meaning. If I happened to have friends with me who can help me, I would ask them how to pronounce the new word. Once I caught the pronunciation, I would say it ten times and then write it down in my own phonetic symbols. While waiting for buses, I would be reading this and committing everything to memory.
Every week I make myself read one English book. If that week was after exam, it would be a thicker book. Otherwise I would choose a thin simplified volume. Even if for whatever reason I missed reading a book, I would make up during the school holidays.
On Sunday I force myself to go through the Editor's commentary. It was laborious! First I read through the entire article, underlining words I have not learned. Next I would check for the meanings and write it next to the word as well as add it to my pocket diary. Then I would go through the article with the meanings in mind. Last of all, I would read the article aloud.
My uncle in China sent a small transistor radio when my grandma visited him. Every night at eleven o'clock I would listen to one hour of The Voice of America broadcast in bed. That tiny radio served me well for about three years. During the holidays I would tune to BBC or the Australia Broadcasting Corporation. My family was too poor to own a TV until my eldest sibling went out to work. Till this day I am not good at catching conversations in movies. I prefer to watch movies with subtitle in another language.
In school I would cultivate friends who would speak to me in English. I particularly appreciate Indian friends who speak English at home. They are good in English and most willing to help me.
From the age 14 to 18 I kept diaries. The earlier pages in my first diary were almost entirely in Chinese. By the time I hit 17, most of everything written was in English except a word here and there that I could not think of an English equivalent.
So you can see, my abilities are hard earned. It seemed worthwhile now as I can definitely reach a wider readership in English than Chinese.
(495) My prof
I have a Computer lecturer whom I respected. One day we were talking about the difference between American and Chinese culture in the use of married and maiden name. Upon marriage, my college friend changed her bank account and driver's license to her husband's family name. Whereas I would retain my father's family name in my passport, driver's license and any legal ID. And I asked if her surname was her ex-husband's or her father's.
Apparently she kept her husband's name until her younger child was twenty one. Then she reverted to her father's name. It was interesting that her divorce was amicable. She just got to the point she could not go on as an appendage of her ex. She chose marriage and children. Yet she did not give up working. It was not easy to survive in the IT field. As soon as she obtained her Master's, she opted for college teaching. That eliminated overtime and traveling on business. All the while she was married, she kept immaculate house and cooked like the ladies in Woman's Weekly. Being a serious lecturer who gives her best, having no household help and being a hands-on mother as well as a good wife who entertains to further her husband's ambition, she had hardly a moment to call her own.
She laughed when she related how she used to chew her sandwich in the car and used her lunch hour to scrub her Master bedroom toilet and bath so as to ensure her husband had a clean and dry bathroom to use at all times. I could not believe my ears: that seemed so unlike what I expected from an American woman. Now that I have been married a quarter of a century, I do see childhood friends who would do anything to keep their married state.
It is sad that the more a woman bends to suit her husband, the more her man seems to demand. My lecturer reached a stage where if she continue to bend, she would either lose her sanity or her identity and become her husband's slave. She stopped, applied for sabbatical and took her children to her place of research for the summer. After having some leisure and a stock-take of her busy life, she talked her ex into a no fault divorce. They have joint custody of the children, she kept them during term time and he kept them during the holidays, at least until he remarried and begot other children. He actually remarried as soon as the divorce was final. That makes me wonder if he had been cheating his wife on the side. My lecturer was still single when I met her. It was refreshing that there was no bitterness in her. She was grateful that her marriage to that man produced two lovely off springs. She felt that her life was full and she had no regrets.
Apparently she kept her husband's name until her younger child was twenty one. Then she reverted to her father's name. It was interesting that her divorce was amicable. She just got to the point she could not go on as an appendage of her ex. She chose marriage and children. Yet she did not give up working. It was not easy to survive in the IT field. As soon as she obtained her Master's, she opted for college teaching. That eliminated overtime and traveling on business. All the while she was married, she kept immaculate house and cooked like the ladies in Woman's Weekly. Being a serious lecturer who gives her best, having no household help and being a hands-on mother as well as a good wife who entertains to further her husband's ambition, she had hardly a moment to call her own.
She laughed when she related how she used to chew her sandwich in the car and used her lunch hour to scrub her Master bedroom toilet and bath so as to ensure her husband had a clean and dry bathroom to use at all times. I could not believe my ears: that seemed so unlike what I expected from an American woman. Now that I have been married a quarter of a century, I do see childhood friends who would do anything to keep their married state.
It is sad that the more a woman bends to suit her husband, the more her man seems to demand. My lecturer reached a stage where if she continue to bend, she would either lose her sanity or her identity and become her husband's slave. She stopped, applied for sabbatical and took her children to her place of research for the summer. After having some leisure and a stock-take of her busy life, she talked her ex into a no fault divorce. They have joint custody of the children, she kept them during term time and he kept them during the holidays, at least until he remarried and begot other children. He actually remarried as soon as the divorce was final. That makes me wonder if he had been cheating his wife on the side. My lecturer was still single when I met her. It was refreshing that there was no bitterness in her. She was grateful that her marriage to that man produced two lovely off springs. She felt that her life was full and she had no regrets.
Sunday, July 3, 2011
(494) Subjugation
Our accountant friend was making a phone call during our high tea. She sounded harassed and was trying to find out details for her own appointment later in the evening. Once her call ended, Mei asked why did she not know what she was supposed to do with the client in her own meeting?
The reply was that her husband made the appointment for her. He told her about it as soon as he reached home the day before. At that time she was working at her computer and could not leave the program. As he was telling her, he kept walking away and she could not hear what he said after he turned a corner and walked into the kitchen. She concentrated on her own task and thought she would ask him later. When she looked for him, he was taking a bath. Next they were having dinner and other issues with the children claimed their attention. She forgot all about it until the following afternoon.
Comments were made. It seemed that all the women gathered there have at one time or other had to run after their husband to make sure they do not miss out on important information. One or two of them hated to have to off cooking fire to go ask for missing info. Others often had to switch off the electric iron to leave the room to hear the rest of the instructions. Lily was the only "smarty pants" who has actually found a way to make the husband finish the conversation before walking off.
Guess what was the reaction of the accountant? She thought it wrong of Lily to "bully" her husband! I am too lazy to go and look up the proper term : there is a word that describes women using age, money, power, authority, peer pressure ... to subjugate other women and make sure that every other woman suffer the same fate as an unfortunate victim. It is one thing to be subjugated willingly oneself: that probably was the price of being married (which is not unusual at all around here). It is quite another to willfully and systematically use words to victimize or subjugate other women!
The reply was that her husband made the appointment for her. He told her about it as soon as he reached home the day before. At that time she was working at her computer and could not leave the program. As he was telling her, he kept walking away and she could not hear what he said after he turned a corner and walked into the kitchen. She concentrated on her own task and thought she would ask him later. When she looked for him, he was taking a bath. Next they were having dinner and other issues with the children claimed their attention. She forgot all about it until the following afternoon.
Comments were made. It seemed that all the women gathered there have at one time or other had to run after their husband to make sure they do not miss out on important information. One or two of them hated to have to off cooking fire to go ask for missing info. Others often had to switch off the electric iron to leave the room to hear the rest of the instructions. Lily was the only "smarty pants" who has actually found a way to make the husband finish the conversation before walking off.
Guess what was the reaction of the accountant? She thought it wrong of Lily to "bully" her husband! I am too lazy to go and look up the proper term : there is a word that describes women using age, money, power, authority, peer pressure ... to subjugate other women and make sure that every other woman suffer the same fate as an unfortunate victim. It is one thing to be subjugated willingly oneself: that probably was the price of being married (which is not unusual at all around here). It is quite another to willfully and systematically use words to victimize or subjugate other women!
Saturday, July 2, 2011
(493) Enmeshed
I learned one new term today. "Enmeshed". When a family is so dependent on each other that they do not keep in touch with any other close relatives.
It is good for a family to be close knit. However, it is not good nor healthy to have a enmeshed family. Let us look at an example. A man graduated with a engineering degree. Once he has some working experience, he started a firm with two friends. Meanwhile, he married his high school sweet heart. Through the years, his business prospered. His family is blessed with two boys and two girls.
They moved a few times, each time to a bigger and more luxurious house. The children grew up, each a graduate in their own right. The family takes yearly vacations. They go everywhere together. If the parents could not persuade the children to go anywhere, nobody goes. Lets say it was all soul's day, they could elect to go back to visit and clear the graves of their parents. As the children grow up, they became more reluctant to go back to their parents' home town. After a while, none from this family turned up anymore for grave visits.
There are five siblings of this father, he is really only in close touch with his only sister. And it was actually the sister that was making the effort to visit them. The rest of his brothers, if they meet at all, it is during Chinese New Year. Apart from his siblings, he nor his children are in touch with anybody else (not uncles, not aunties, not cousins ...). This is very unusual in Asia, where kins are an important part of one's family and identity. This enmeshed family is like an island floating in the ocean of community. I guess they would not know any of their neighbours either.
Do you belong to an enmashed family? Family members should be each independent individuals, then each member of the close knit family is inter depedent on each other. That would be a healthy model of a happy family.
It is good for a family to be close knit. However, it is not good nor healthy to have a enmeshed family. Let us look at an example. A man graduated with a engineering degree. Once he has some working experience, he started a firm with two friends. Meanwhile, he married his high school sweet heart. Through the years, his business prospered. His family is blessed with two boys and two girls.
They moved a few times, each time to a bigger and more luxurious house. The children grew up, each a graduate in their own right. The family takes yearly vacations. They go everywhere together. If the parents could not persuade the children to go anywhere, nobody goes. Lets say it was all soul's day, they could elect to go back to visit and clear the graves of their parents. As the children grow up, they became more reluctant to go back to their parents' home town. After a while, none from this family turned up anymore for grave visits.
There are five siblings of this father, he is really only in close touch with his only sister. And it was actually the sister that was making the effort to visit them. The rest of his brothers, if they meet at all, it is during Chinese New Year. Apart from his siblings, he nor his children are in touch with anybody else (not uncles, not aunties, not cousins ...). This is very unusual in Asia, where kins are an important part of one's family and identity. This enmeshed family is like an island floating in the ocean of community. I guess they would not know any of their neighbours either.
Do you belong to an enmashed family? Family members should be each independent individuals, then each member of the close knit family is inter depedent on each other. That would be a healthy model of a happy family.
(492) Upbringing 51
I was in a crowded place. A child was running around. She came to an abrupt stop between me and the person I was exchanging pleasantries with. Before she turned around and run on away from me, she threw a fleeting glance at me.
In that glance, she imbued it with feelings. "Now, why did you stand there and block my way? Can't you see I was heading towards you?" She was almost angry, very frustrated that this "blockhead" (me) who chose to block her rather than walking on to make way for her. There was a tinge of regret that she was one tenth my size and could not afford to knock smack into me.
Later, I fell into a conversation with her mother. I mentioned casually that her daughter reminded me of Elizabeth at that age. It was the strong will, the purposefulness, and the decisiveness that I picked up on. Quite a number of adults did not like that in Elizabeth and told me so. Even when Elizabeth was two years old, I knew what I was dealing with. I chose to see it as good raw ingredients to work with. With time, with prayers, with a lot of hard work, she became what she is today. It was all to God's glory.
I used books to shape her character. This little girl's mum fasts and prays regularly for God to change her little girl. It has been working for her. Everyone has his or her own preference. I, for one, am not inclined to fast unless it is a half day fast for my country or to make a major personal decision. I am impressed that another woman is so completely dependent and humble before the Lord. But which ever way, we all try our level best. The rest is really up to God.
In that glance, she imbued it with feelings. "Now, why did you stand there and block my way? Can't you see I was heading towards you?" She was almost angry, very frustrated that this "blockhead" (me) who chose to block her rather than walking on to make way for her. There was a tinge of regret that she was one tenth my size and could not afford to knock smack into me.
Later, I fell into a conversation with her mother. I mentioned casually that her daughter reminded me of Elizabeth at that age. It was the strong will, the purposefulness, and the decisiveness that I picked up on. Quite a number of adults did not like that in Elizabeth and told me so. Even when Elizabeth was two years old, I knew what I was dealing with. I chose to see it as good raw ingredients to work with. With time, with prayers, with a lot of hard work, she became what she is today. It was all to God's glory.
I used books to shape her character. This little girl's mum fasts and prays regularly for God to change her little girl. It has been working for her. Everyone has his or her own preference. I, for one, am not inclined to fast unless it is a half day fast for my country or to make a major personal decision. I am impressed that another woman is so completely dependent and humble before the Lord. But which ever way, we all try our level best. The rest is really up to God.
(491) Blood sugar level
A normal person could eat three meals a day and a reasonable amount of dessert daily. We need to eat to live.
A friend of mine is diabetic. She does not take anything sweet, not even a thin slice of another person's birthday cake. It was her birthday last week. Another friend made a not so sweet jelly cake to celebrate the former's birthday. She took a small piece, and I mean it could hardly be any smaller.
An hour later she was giddy from a sugar spike. She lie down and rub ointment on her forehead. No one expected her to react so. Apparently, she had breakfast very early. By the time she ate the jelly, it went into an empty stomach. When she was totally out, it was actually lunch time. Yet she was too unwell to get up to eat anything.
Now I know why some individuals, with parents who are severely diabetic, avoid dessert and sweet things like plague.
A friend of mine is diabetic. She does not take anything sweet, not even a thin slice of another person's birthday cake. It was her birthday last week. Another friend made a not so sweet jelly cake to celebrate the former's birthday. She took a small piece, and I mean it could hardly be any smaller.
An hour later she was giddy from a sugar spike. She lie down and rub ointment on her forehead. No one expected her to react so. Apparently, she had breakfast very early. By the time she ate the jelly, it went into an empty stomach. When she was totally out, it was actually lunch time. Yet she was too unwell to get up to eat anything.
Now I know why some individuals, with parents who are severely diabetic, avoid dessert and sweet things like plague.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
(490) Individuality
I went for a lady's coffee morning gathering. Four of us were in the kitchen. Amelia made coffee for herself using a mug. Betty made tea in a mug too. I made coffee in a teacup while Dorothy made tea in a teacup.
We looked at each other and noticed no one did anything alike. Amelia is of the opinion that coffee should be made in a mug. Well, she said we call coffee mug and not tea mug. Betty likes to have a mug of tea so she does not have to add water to a shallow teacup. I am having a taste of coffee and limiting my caffeine intake. Dorothy is like a properly trained English lady who does not fancy tea in any other vessel.
Well, one man's meat is another's poison. More often than not, we have different ways of doing things. While we have our preferences, it will be good to respect and allow others room to be different.
We looked at each other and noticed no one did anything alike. Amelia is of the opinion that coffee should be made in a mug. Well, she said we call coffee mug and not tea mug. Betty likes to have a mug of tea so she does not have to add water to a shallow teacup. I am having a taste of coffee and limiting my caffeine intake. Dorothy is like a properly trained English lady who does not fancy tea in any other vessel.
Well, one man's meat is another's poison. More often than not, we have different ways of doing things. While we have our preferences, it will be good to respect and allow others room to be different.
(489) Eldest by Christopher Paolini
This is not a review. I read the book and Elva brought back childhood memories. Since memories are flitting, it helps to document it while it lasts.
Elva was mentioned a few times. Eragon and Saphira "blessed" her as a baby. Although everything was done with good intentions, the mistake made in wording shielded as shield turned the blessing into a curse.
When I was young, I must have been an exceptional child. A number of the gifts I was born with which frightened me most are no longer with me. Don't ask me what happened! I don't remember. Somehow I must have switched them off. Looking at my children and my deceased father, I must have had a tape recorder database and a photocopier memory at birth. With no training, I was good at putting things together to draw conclusions that later turned out to be true. Now, with hind sight, I see it as exceptional logical and analytical skills. Everything seemed to work on a sub-conscious level. I have known since very young that I was not like the rest of the children around me. I didn't like it. I thought it was being abnormal. Now I know that it was being super normal. Those were blessings and assets, not curses.
Anyway, when one is handed a lemon, one can make lemonade, right? I am adding sugar now to whatever innate intuition and ability I still have to help my "tribe" -- the group of folks with different learning styles.
Elva was mentioned a few times. Eragon and Saphira "blessed" her as a baby. Although everything was done with good intentions, the mistake made in wording shielded as shield turned the blessing into a curse.
When I was young, I must have been an exceptional child. A number of the gifts I was born with which frightened me most are no longer with me. Don't ask me what happened! I don't remember. Somehow I must have switched them off. Looking at my children and my deceased father, I must have had a tape recorder database and a photocopier memory at birth. With no training, I was good at putting things together to draw conclusions that later turned out to be true. Now, with hind sight, I see it as exceptional logical and analytical skills. Everything seemed to work on a sub-conscious level. I have known since very young that I was not like the rest of the children around me. I didn't like it. I thought it was being abnormal. Now I know that it was being super normal. Those were blessings and assets, not curses.
Anyway, when one is handed a lemon, one can make lemonade, right? I am adding sugar now to whatever innate intuition and ability I still have to help my "tribe" -- the group of folks with different learning styles.
(488) Extra ordinary favour
A friend told me this real incident.
A missionary kid was applying for a visa to enter the United States of America. She was attending an International School and her transcript from Grade 1 onwards was in a database in USA. From thousands of children, she was a lucky one among many to be chosen to attend a leadership conference in America. Since she has just completed Grade 11, she thought she might as well go and look at a few campuses. Food and lodging for the conference would be sponsored. There are family friends to receive her at the airport. Another close family friend would pay for her airfare. It looks like she is all set.
In the Pacific island they resides, apparently it takes three months to apply for a visa. They filled in all the relevant forms and applied. There was an application fee. They were directed to pay through a certain British bank. This missionary family does not own any bank account in this bank. For convenience sake, a friend paid on their behalf. Right after the payment, that friend went abroad. Perhaps it was remiss for both party, no one thought of passing the bank receipt to the person applying for the visa.
In due time, this teenager was called for an interview. Looking at the document list, they realized that they lack the bank receipt. What to do? They just prayed and committed everything to God. On the actual day, the parents dropped her at the embassy gate. No parent was allowed to accompany the interviewee. She went in with trepidation. It was stated that clearing security may take 45 minutes. It was a surprise that she cleared security after 5 minutes. The interview was expected to last 2 hours. A receptionist checked through the stack of documents. The missing receipt was duly noted. She waited to be called.
And she waited. People who came before her was called. Folks who came after her was called. Half an hour passed. She was nervous. Forty five minutes went by. Her hands started sweating. Her turn came. She was called to go to the most intimidating interviewer. By this time, she was almost in a panic. She prayed and took a deep breath. Walking to the far counter, she greeted the interviewing officer and sat down.
Lo and behold! The interviewer smiled at her and asked her a few routine questions. Then he went out of his way to help her by offering to give her a one year multiple entry visa. Further to that, he went on to advise her to request for letters of invitation from the colleges she plans to visit. Otherwise, she may have problems clearing immigration on arrival.
It was extraordinary favour from God.
A missionary kid was applying for a visa to enter the United States of America. She was attending an International School and her transcript from Grade 1 onwards was in a database in USA. From thousands of children, she was a lucky one among many to be chosen to attend a leadership conference in America. Since she has just completed Grade 11, she thought she might as well go and look at a few campuses. Food and lodging for the conference would be sponsored. There are family friends to receive her at the airport. Another close family friend would pay for her airfare. It looks like she is all set.
In the Pacific island they resides, apparently it takes three months to apply for a visa. They filled in all the relevant forms and applied. There was an application fee. They were directed to pay through a certain British bank. This missionary family does not own any bank account in this bank. For convenience sake, a friend paid on their behalf. Right after the payment, that friend went abroad. Perhaps it was remiss for both party, no one thought of passing the bank receipt to the person applying for the visa.
In due time, this teenager was called for an interview. Looking at the document list, they realized that they lack the bank receipt. What to do? They just prayed and committed everything to God. On the actual day, the parents dropped her at the embassy gate. No parent was allowed to accompany the interviewee. She went in with trepidation. It was stated that clearing security may take 45 minutes. It was a surprise that she cleared security after 5 minutes. The interview was expected to last 2 hours. A receptionist checked through the stack of documents. The missing receipt was duly noted. She waited to be called.
And she waited. People who came before her was called. Folks who came after her was called. Half an hour passed. She was nervous. Forty five minutes went by. Her hands started sweating. Her turn came. She was called to go to the most intimidating interviewer. By this time, she was almost in a panic. She prayed and took a deep breath. Walking to the far counter, she greeted the interviewing officer and sat down.
Lo and behold! The interviewer smiled at her and asked her a few routine questions. Then he went out of his way to help her by offering to give her a one year multiple entry visa. Further to that, he went on to advise her to request for letters of invitation from the colleges she plans to visit. Otherwise, she may have problems clearing immigration on arrival.
It was extraordinary favour from God.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
(487) Zelda's prince charming
Remember my friend Zelda? I sat and prayed with her through her mission trip in London. I also sat with her through her internet courting through a Christian website. I must have looked at more than fifty photographs of men. So have I gone through looking at all kinds of possibles pursuing her for months, none of them lasted.
I have come to be rather philosophical about her would be marriage. In my head, I separate people into the marrying and the non-marrying kind. Maybe, in spite of all she said, she belongs to the second group.
Guess what I heard today? She has prayed and received her answer. If her most recent possible furnishes all personal details and come to her and all information given tallied, then she will say yes. I was shocked! He, judging from one photograph, is not really good looking. Perhaps to do him justice, I would say that he looks pleasant. This person has little materially. Not that I would look for a millionaire to marry, but I would not choose one of the poorest either. This person towers over her in height and weighs twice her weight. I know that she saw a tall and large man in her dream. But double her weight? One good point is she can abandon her weight watching and eat, for she would still be petite standing next to him.
Truly, I admire her guts and adventurous spirit. She prayed for a husband who would partner her in mission work. And if this guy persists and is checked to be genuine, she is ready to marry him this year and follow him to the ends of the world to declare the Lordship of Jesus Christ. Amazing!
Please read (9), (994), (749), (361), (383), (401), (520)
I have come to be rather philosophical about her would be marriage. In my head, I separate people into the marrying and the non-marrying kind. Maybe, in spite of all she said, she belongs to the second group.
Guess what I heard today? She has prayed and received her answer. If her most recent possible furnishes all personal details and come to her and all information given tallied, then she will say yes. I was shocked! He, judging from one photograph, is not really good looking. Perhaps to do him justice, I would say that he looks pleasant. This person has little materially. Not that I would look for a millionaire to marry, but I would not choose one of the poorest either. This person towers over her in height and weighs twice her weight. I know that she saw a tall and large man in her dream. But double her weight? One good point is she can abandon her weight watching and eat, for she would still be petite standing next to him.
Truly, I admire her guts and adventurous spirit. She prayed for a husband who would partner her in mission work. And if this guy persists and is checked to be genuine, she is ready to marry him this year and follow him to the ends of the world to declare the Lordship of Jesus Christ. Amazing!
Please read (9), (994), (749), (361), (383), (401), (520)
(486) Being Observant
A few days ago I went out with a neighbour. Mrs Tee went to drop one child for a tutoring session. Then we went to a food court so her other child could have dinner. Next thing that happened is that Junior with a full tummy was dropped. We sat in the car chatting until the first child emerged from the tutoring center with a stream of students.
We had a delicious dinner and then proceeded to shop for the first child. Interestingly, as we were chatting about everyday things in the neighbourhood, names were attached to neighbors we know by recognition. There is this house where two sisters live. The elder one has two sons while the younger one has one son. I had to describe which is which. The first child with whom I was having a meal, is a girl of 16, commented that my neighbour the younger sister has a very respectful, filial son. I was really taken aback.
For I know that these two young people were not even nodding acquintance. Our houses are positioned in such a way that we can see each other coming in and going out. Ha! Here is an observant girl who is a good judge of character.
I tried to look back to the year I was 16. I don't remember any near neighbour with a twenty year old son. Even if there was, I probably won't notice much as I was running in and out of the house busy with school activities.
Now that I am interested, I must keep in touch with this neighbour. Some day I would like to see if the girl make good use of her skill in selecting a good husband.
We had a delicious dinner and then proceeded to shop for the first child. Interestingly, as we were chatting about everyday things in the neighbourhood, names were attached to neighbors we know by recognition. There is this house where two sisters live. The elder one has two sons while the younger one has one son. I had to describe which is which. The first child with whom I was having a meal, is a girl of 16, commented that my neighbour the younger sister has a very respectful, filial son. I was really taken aback.
For I know that these two young people were not even nodding acquintance. Our houses are positioned in such a way that we can see each other coming in and going out. Ha! Here is an observant girl who is a good judge of character.
I tried to look back to the year I was 16. I don't remember any near neighbour with a twenty year old son. Even if there was, I probably won't notice much as I was running in and out of the house busy with school activities.
Now that I am interested, I must keep in touch with this neighbour. Some day I would like to see if the girl make good use of her skill in selecting a good husband.
(485) Computer Search
One day before Elizabeth started on her temporary job, she asked me if there is any one I wanted to locate. So I named one person who seemed to have her act together in my senior year. We'll call her Jane here.
Lo and behold, my daughter actually found Jane as part of the faculty in one of the nearby colleges not too far from my alma mater. She worked for the Government for a time until she qualified to lecture. No, I did not contact her. It is not that I don't like her. Just that I know very little about Jane. She was smart, attractive, had a boyfriend studying far away and just seemed to be so cool. She was a far better student that I was. Whenever I got stressed, she welcomed me to sit in her room to listen to classical music which would sooth my trouble soul. We seldom talk, as she was a reflective person and when I was troubled, I seldom talk.
This led me to wonder, if any of my old friends wanted to locate me; would they be able to find me on line? No! My son said. And he ought to know, as he is the most IT savvy person in my family. The reason is I have ceased to use the given name my parents gave me. I chose a new name, something no one expected me to choose. Also I adopted my husband's family name, even though most Chinese women do not in this part of the world (especially Chinese educated ones, and I was instructed in classical literature right up to 18 years old).
An old friend asked me why? She noticed I have effectively cut away my past. I am no longer the person I used to be. I have given up a lot of things I held dear to my heart, more than just a successful career, when I chose marriage and children. For I know that bringing up my children would exclude a vocation and personal ambition. And I also know that by the time all my children are grown and gone, I would be quite an authority in the field of bringing out the best of special children. Hence forth, I owe it to the many people who have suffered a frustrated childhood (due to one reason or another, as there is little awareness about learning disability in many parts of the world) to make my findings available if they are searching for it. I don't know exactly who reads my blog. Just like you don't know much about me(not my real name and particulars). But if you have read all three hundred over postings of mine, you should know me very well.
But whoever you are, if week in and week out you come in to catch up on my tale, I appreciate your tenacity. If you care enough to follow me real time, I must be writing something that is important and close to your heart. I thank you for your confidence in me. All I have is a liberal arts degree and many years of experience in bringing up my unique children.
Lo and behold, my daughter actually found Jane as part of the faculty in one of the nearby colleges not too far from my alma mater. She worked for the Government for a time until she qualified to lecture. No, I did not contact her. It is not that I don't like her. Just that I know very little about Jane. She was smart, attractive, had a boyfriend studying far away and just seemed to be so cool. She was a far better student that I was. Whenever I got stressed, she welcomed me to sit in her room to listen to classical music which would sooth my trouble soul. We seldom talk, as she was a reflective person and when I was troubled, I seldom talk.
This led me to wonder, if any of my old friends wanted to locate me; would they be able to find me on line? No! My son said. And he ought to know, as he is the most IT savvy person in my family. The reason is I have ceased to use the given name my parents gave me. I chose a new name, something no one expected me to choose. Also I adopted my husband's family name, even though most Chinese women do not in this part of the world (especially Chinese educated ones, and I was instructed in classical literature right up to 18 years old).
An old friend asked me why? She noticed I have effectively cut away my past. I am no longer the person I used to be. I have given up a lot of things I held dear to my heart, more than just a successful career, when I chose marriage and children. For I know that bringing up my children would exclude a vocation and personal ambition. And I also know that by the time all my children are grown and gone, I would be quite an authority in the field of bringing out the best of special children. Hence forth, I owe it to the many people who have suffered a frustrated childhood (due to one reason or another, as there is little awareness about learning disability in many parts of the world) to make my findings available if they are searching for it. I don't know exactly who reads my blog. Just like you don't know much about me(not my real name and particulars). But if you have read all three hundred over postings of mine, you should know me very well.
But whoever you are, if week in and week out you come in to catch up on my tale, I appreciate your tenacity. If you care enough to follow me real time, I must be writing something that is important and close to your heart. I thank you for your confidence in me. All I have is a liberal arts degree and many years of experience in bringing up my unique children.
(484) One way Broadcast
Using the statistics function of Blogger as well as Google Analytics, I was able piece together some information about my faithful readers.
You come from 36 countries: (recorded in the order the first reader from one country reads my blog) Malaysia, Russia,USA, Canada, Slovenia, Denmark, Germany, China, UK, Sweden, France, Japan, Macedonia, Italy, Ireland, Spain, Kenya, Poland, Australia, Netherlands, Colombia, Slovakia, South Africa. Ukraine, Brasil, Indonesia, India, Greece, Sri Lanka, Philippines, Romania, Singapore, Pakistan, Iran, Austria, and Taiwan.
The top ten countries my readers come from are: USA(1004 pageviews), Malaysia, Canada, France, Germany, Russia, UK, Slovenia, India, Japan(18 page views).
At last count last week, I have 2 real time readers from USA, 2 from M'sia, 1 from India and 1 from Germany. I wonder if they keep their computers on 24 hours a day, both in the office and at home. Do you read my blog from computer screen, I-pad or hand phone? Should I customise the layout of my blog to fit a smaller screen?
Do folks sleep? Whether I blog in the morning, afternoon, evening, night or at three o'clock in the morning, these six readers would appear within one or two hours at most, regardless of time zones. Do people keep their hand phone on throughout the night? It is most interesting that a writer that avoids hand phone finds that such technology keeps people up to date round the clock in touch with this blog. I salute you, reading warriors who sleep little.
You come from 36 countries: (recorded in the order the first reader from one country reads my blog) Malaysia, Russia,USA, Canada, Slovenia, Denmark, Germany, China, UK, Sweden, France, Japan, Macedonia, Italy, Ireland, Spain, Kenya, Poland, Australia, Netherlands, Colombia, Slovakia, South Africa. Ukraine, Brasil, Indonesia, India, Greece, Sri Lanka, Philippines, Romania, Singapore, Pakistan, Iran, Austria, and Taiwan.
The top ten countries my readers come from are: USA(1004 pageviews), Malaysia, Canada, France, Germany, Russia, UK, Slovenia, India, Japan(18 page views).
At last count last week, I have 2 real time readers from USA, 2 from M'sia, 1 from India and 1 from Germany. I wonder if they keep their computers on 24 hours a day, both in the office and at home. Do you read my blog from computer screen, I-pad or hand phone? Should I customise the layout of my blog to fit a smaller screen?
Do folks sleep? Whether I blog in the morning, afternoon, evening, night or at three o'clock in the morning, these six readers would appear within one or two hours at most, regardless of time zones. Do people keep their hand phone on throughout the night? It is most interesting that a writer that avoids hand phone finds that such technology keeps people up to date round the clock in touch with this blog. I salute you, reading warriors who sleep little.
(483) A Corner of the Universe by Ann M. Martin
First I will list every book mentioned that was written by Ann.
Bummer Summer 1980
At least four books: The Baby-sitters Club
Leo the Magnificent (picture book)
P.S. Longer Letter Later n Snail Mail No More ( Co-authored with Paula Danziger)
The Doll People n The Meanest Doll in the World (Co-authored with Laura Godwin)
Belle Teal (a Publisher's Weekly Best Book of the Year)
Here Today
A Corner of the Universe (a Newberry Honour Book)
A Dog's Life
In (474) I have written my two cents worth of my response to Here Today. Here I want to state that "A Corner of the Universe" is the most touching book I read in 2011. Considering books that I have borrowed and read that I have nothing to write about, this is probably ranked number one in at least 100.
If you have a special child as a sibling, off spring, niece or nephew, grandchild, ... Please go to Amazon or a Book Swap site to locate "A Corner of the Universe". It will show you a side of a special child or adult that you have never thought about.
I have known that I was one of the "freaks" since age 21. But I was intelligent enough and act well enough to pass off as kind of normal for years. Adam could tell the day of the week for any day we care to name. His parents forbid him to exibit that ability because it was like a circus trick.
Looking at the way Ann described Adam, he could have been born autistic but did not adjust well and later became a schizophrenic. It did not help that his father was a prosperous lawyer and the mother is the richest woman in town from a long line of a proud family.
What do we measure as valuable in a person? Normality? Intelligence? A good heart? Wealth? Popularity? Fame? Special abilities? An average person who is loving and loyal? Faithfulness? Or are we able to accept and love another just because he or she is created by a God who makes no mistakes?
Bummer Summer 1980
At least four books: The Baby-sitters Club
Leo the Magnificent (picture book)
P.S. Longer Letter Later n Snail Mail No More ( Co-authored with Paula Danziger)
The Doll People n The Meanest Doll in the World (Co-authored with Laura Godwin)
Belle Teal (a Publisher's Weekly Best Book of the Year)
Here Today
A Corner of the Universe (a Newberry Honour Book)
A Dog's Life
In (474) I have written my two cents worth of my response to Here Today. Here I want to state that "A Corner of the Universe" is the most touching book I read in 2011. Considering books that I have borrowed and read that I have nothing to write about, this is probably ranked number one in at least 100.
If you have a special child as a sibling, off spring, niece or nephew, grandchild, ... Please go to Amazon or a Book Swap site to locate "A Corner of the Universe". It will show you a side of a special child or adult that you have never thought about.
I have known that I was one of the "freaks" since age 21. But I was intelligent enough and act well enough to pass off as kind of normal for years. Adam could tell the day of the week for any day we care to name. His parents forbid him to exibit that ability because it was like a circus trick.
Looking at the way Ann described Adam, he could have been born autistic but did not adjust well and later became a schizophrenic. It did not help that his father was a prosperous lawyer and the mother is the richest woman in town from a long line of a proud family.
What do we measure as valuable in a person? Normality? Intelligence? A good heart? Wealth? Popularity? Fame? Special abilities? An average person who is loving and loyal? Faithfulness? Or are we able to accept and love another just because he or she is created by a God who makes no mistakes?
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